A LOVE STORY.
I obtained work at one of the plantations for three pounds sterling per
week. For this money I was expected only to work eight hours a day and
five hours on Saturdays, that being the ordinary tradesman's hours of
work all over Australia. But as my employer was busy and I was tired of
remaining poor longer than I could help, I obtained leave to work two
hours overtime every day, for which I was paid at the rate of
eighteenpence an hour. When I arrived in Mackay I had gone into a
Chinaman's boarding-house, as being the most suitable place for my means
and condition, but although a similar place had suited me well enough in
the gold-diggings, the class of men who stayed here and the
accommodation I received did not now suit me at all. I seemed to shrink
into myself and gradually got into a morbid and unhealthy state of mind.
I was as good, at least I thought myself as good, as most of the clerks
or well-dressed young fellows I saw knocking about the town, doing very
little work; but that they were of a different opinion was evident from
the scathing contempt one or two of them managed once or twice to put
into their manner towards me the first week I was in town when I by
accident had addressed them. Do clothes make the man? thought I; was it
necessary for me to conform to their habits, and to imitate them, to
secure respect or even civility? I would not do it. What would be
gained? All was vanity. Another little incident which had not been
without its influence upon me, I mention to show that such unconsidered
trifles make the sum total of ordinary life, was this: the day I arrived
in town, but when I was yet about half a mile from it, I had met four
young ladies, who I suppose were out for a walk. They were evidently
dressed in their best clothes and looked both nice and pretty, and as
youth always recognizes a sort of relation in youth--or, if you prefer
it, young men always take an interest in young women, and _vice
versa_--I was looking closely at them and they at me as we neared each
other on the road. They took no trouble in concealing their verdict of
me. I will not say they were so ill-bred as to make grimaces at me, but
they might just as soon have gathered their skirts about them and held
their noses. I saw that they considered me an undesirable party. I was
just then in rather high spirits, which could not be damped all in a
moment, so as I met and passed them I took my stick up and held it in
military fashion close to my shoulder as I marched by. I could hear them
giggling behind me, but I did not look round, and lovelorn as I
was--because you must remember my adventure of the day before--it had a
depressing effect upon me, which grew as time went. So, after staying
for a week in the Chinaman's boarding-house, with the first money I got
I bought a tent and pitched it right away in a lonely spot, and there I
lived by myself, like a regular hermit. I thought of Thorkill who was
dead and of his lonely grave, that dream for which I could not account,
and I thought, too, of my own home from which I had heard nothing now
for years, and I brooded over my own friendless condition. Then I
thought of the girl on the plantation I had left behind me, but it never
entered my head for a moment to go and visit her. Far from it. I would
travel to the end of the world to put it out of my power rather than do
that, or for two pins I would then have put an end to myself! It seems
to me as I write, that, this being simply true, it should not be without
a salutary warning to other young men not to allow themselves to drift
into the same state of temperament, because it is dangerous and may
spoil a life which otherwise might become useful; nor is there any merit
in such misanthropy, as the subsequent pages will show, and but one
little straw one way or the other will have its effect during the
remainder of one's life.
One thing which it is difficult to write about, as it seems to have no
logic or sense in it, but which, nevertheless, was of great importance
to me, was this: I worked like a tiger, not because I was fond of work
nor to get away from my morbid feelings, because I did not struggle
against them, nor because I was fond of money, as I had very little use
for any, as I thought, and as my wages were the same whether I worked
like an average man or did more, but I worked because in my morbid brain
I liked to fancy that the girl on the plantation was in great distress,
and that her life and liberty depended upon my doing certain work in a
certain time. When I got a piece of work to do I would think to myself
in this way: here is a week's work for any man, but unless I can do it
in four days, then--all sorts of misery will happen. Therefore I really
worked as if my life depended on it, and I would be perfectly intolerant
of any obstruction to my progress. My "boss" took in the situation very
soon, because he let me stand by myself and dared scarcely speak to me
for fear of putting me out.
This state of affairs had lasted about three months, and during that
time I can almost count on my fingers the words I had said; I do not
think I had spoken to any one one unnecessary word. It cost me only five
or six shillings a week to live. I had bought merely the most necessary
clothes, and all the rest of my money and cheques I had received were in
my possession, lying in a pickle-bottle in the tent.
One afternoon as I came from my work I saw in front of me in the street
the girl from the plantation. I ran after her. "Sophy, Sophy, is that
you?" Happy meeting! She had been in town for a month and was now a
dressmaker; but let it be enough to say that I went at once to the tent
and got out the money and bought the best clothes I could get in town,
that I went to stay at an hotel, and that, as time went on, I kept two
horses in a paddock, ordered a side-saddle, and for sixteen months after
used to boast to myself that no one among the tradesmen in Mackay had a
prettier sweetheart, was a better dancer, kept such good horses, or
earned so much money as myself!
I reckon this time as being among my most pleasant recollections. People
did not seem to me so egotistic or the world so black as it had appeared
while I lived in the tent; on the contrary, I was often invited among
very nice people to their parties and family gatherings, and I was a
constant attendant at both Oddfellows' and Caledonian balls, and, in
short, anything that was going on. I was intending some day in the near
future to marry and settle down, and for that reason had bought an
allotment for twenty-five pounds, and I meant to build a house on it. I
had only one fault to find with the lady who honoured me with her
approbation. It was this: she was fearfully jealous and excitable, and
would at such times be in a perfect rage if I had done anything which
she thought not becoming; but as I took it as a proof of the value in
which she held me, I rather liked it, and even sometimes went so far as
to excite her suspicion on purpose just to get up a "scene." This
happened again one day when I had been sixteen months in Mackay. The
occasion was that I had, as it was Sunday, been out for a ride with
another young lady--I had things so handy, the two horses, one with
side-saddle and all, and the temptation to a little extra flirtation was
always great--but when that evening, in a most dutiful mood, I went to
see my "only love," she, I remember, was very angry indeed with me. She
was sitting sewing in her room, and I was sitting also at the table in a
careless position, with my head on my hand and my elbow on the table,
smiling at her and enjoying matters very much, although, as I have
written above, she was very angry, and even crying. She rated me
terribly, too, for my wickedness, and I was defending myself mildly.
"Dear," I said, "I only took her out to-day as a mark of the respect in
which I hold her."
"I'll mark you!" she cried, and she struck me in the mouth with terrible
violence. The blow not only knocked me off the chair, but sent one of my
front teeth spinning round the room, and to this day I am marked by the
absence of that tooth. I got up; she stood gasping with excitement,
looking at me. I cannot give the reader any idea how handsome she was,
or how fond I was of her. Still, this would never do. I took the lamp
from the table and began looking for my tooth on the floor. I never
spoke, neither did she say anything. I can well remember. When I had
found the tooth I took my hat up and went away. This would never do,
thought I, I must be off somewhere by the next steamer, never to return;
because I knew very well that if I stayed in Mackay I should just go and
make love to her again. I therefore decided I would be off, never mind
where I went; and in that mood I arrived at my hotel. On the verandah
stood one of the boarders who was the captain of a labour schooner. For
the information of my readers who may not know what that means I will
state that the plantations round Mackay and elsewhere in Queensland
employ a great many South Sea Islanders, and that these men are brought
to Queensland under a certain system. It is this way: a number of
planters unite in sending a ship out among the South Sea Islands to
engage all the Kanakas the ship can hold, and who are willing to come.
The ship so engaged is under Government orders, and the Government sends
an agent with the ship, whose duty is to watch that no coercion is
employed in order to get "the boys" to engage, and that they understand
their agreements with the planter. These agreements are all uniform. The
Kanakas engage for three years' service, for which the planter gives
them their food and six pounds per year; he also defrays the cost of
bringing them to Queensland, and when their time is out he sends them at
his own cost back to the island whence they came. As I now came up on
the verandah the captain spoke to me and invited me in to have a drink
with him. He had been staying in the hotel for about a month and I knew
him very well, so we went into the bar and began to talk about his
affairs. He intended to start for the South Seas the following night, if
all went well; the only thing that upset him just then was that his cook
had deserted the ship and was not to be found. He did not care except
for this reason--that he could not afford to keep the ship waiting, and
on the other hand he did not know where to get another, as he could not
do without a good cook. "Faith, then," said I, "I am a good cook, as
cooks go in this part of the world, and, what is more to the purpose,
not only do I intend to leave Mackay to-morrow if I can, but I have a
great longing to see the South Sea Islands, and therefore I am your man,
if you like."
He could not see that at all for a long time, and thought I was having a
lark with him, but when at last I said there was a lady at the bottom of
it, he winked and thought he knew all about it. So at break of day the
next morning we went on board the schooner, and I started in the cook's
galley making breakfast for all hands. I peeled potatoes and flogged the
steak as if I had never done anything else in my life, because the
captain would not engage me before I had shown my capabilities; but
after my trial he was quite satisfied and engaged me for the trip at
eight pounds per month, and then I stipulated before signing articles
that I should have leave of absence until break of day next morning, as
it was necessary for me to put my affairs in order before I left Mackay.
After having given my word of honour to return, I went ashore again.
There was enough for me to see to. My "boss" did not owe me anything, as
I had received my last cheque on the previous Saturday; but there were
my tools to dispose of. These went for a trifle among the other men: one
took one piece, one another, and the "boss" gave me his cheque for the
lot. Then there were the horses and saddles; these also were got rid of
before dinner-time, and when evening came I had sold my allotment which
I had bought for twenty-five pounds, for one hundred and fifty pounds,
and had all the money lodged in the bank. I had not, therefore, done so
badly in Mackay the eighteen or nineteen months I had been there. Not
only, on an average, had I enjoyed myself pretty well, but the sum total
which I now had to my credit was as near two hundred and fifty pounds as
possible. After tea I had nothing to do but reflect on the wisdom or
otherwise of the step I had taken. I walked about the streets for a long
time, and as I knew very well that my sweetheart expected me as usual I
found myself circling round the house in which she lived. She did not,
of course, know that I was going away, and as she usually expected me
about seven o'clock of an evening, my feet seemed perforce to carry me
towards the house. I did not go in; at eight o'clock I saw her sitting
by the window, at nine o'clock she was there still, at ten o'clock I saw
her sitting by the window as I came past the place, at eleven o'clock
she was standing outside, and I was right up to her before I saw her.
The reader must not expect too much confidence from me; I cannot repeat
what she said, and will only say this--that I have never seen her since,
and that with a heavy heart I went on board the schooner next morning,
when we hoisted anchor and left for the South Sea Islands.
Dear reader, if I were to tell you all that happened to me on this
journey in the same detailed way as I have told you about my travels
through Queensland, it would take me too far away and also occupy too
much space, so I have thought it better to leave it all out and take up
the thread of my history at the point when I again arrived in Port
Mackay about nine months after. Should this effort of mine meet with the
approbation of the public, I shall be very glad to write another book
about my adventures in the South Seas, but at present I will content
myself by saying that although many things I saw upon this journey were
new and startling to me, yet on the whole we had a good journey, and
that I was paid off in Mackay when we came back, and at once took a
passage in a steamer for Brisbane.