How Apuleius saved himselfe from the Cooke, breaking his halter, and of
other things that happened.
In this manner the traiterous Cooke prepared himselfe to slay me: and
when he was ready with his knives to doe his feat, I devised with my
selfe how I might escape the present perill, and I did not long delay:
for incontinently I brake the halter wherewith I was tied, and flinging
my heeles hither and thither to save my selfe, at length I ran hastily
into a Parlour, where the Master of the house was feasting with the
Priests of the goddesse Syria, and disquieted all the company, throwing
downe their meats and drinks from the table. The Master of the house
dismayed at my great disorder, commanded one of his servants to take me
up, and locke me in some strong place, to the end I might disturb them
no more. But I little regarded my imprisonment, considering that I was
happily delivered from the hands of the traiterous Cooke. Howbeit
fortune, or the fatall disposition of the divine providence, which
neither can be avoided by wise counsell, neither yet by any wholesome
remedie, invented a new torment, for by and by a young ladde came
running into the Parlour all trembling, and declared to the Master of
the house, that there was a madde Dog running about in the streetes,
which had done much harme, for he had bitten many grey hounds and
horses in the Inne by: And he spared neither man nor beast. For there
was one Mitilius a Mulettour, Epheseus, a Cooke, Hyppanius a
chamberlaine, and Appolonius a Physition, who (thinking to chase away
the madde Dogge) were cruelly wounded by him, insomuch that many Horses
and other beasts infected with the venyme of his poysonous teeth became
madde likewise. Which thing caused them all at the table greatly to
feare, and thinking that I had beene bitten in like sort, came out with
speares, Clubs, and Pitchforks purposing to slay me, and I had
undoubtedly beene slaine, had I not by and by crept into the Chamber,
where my Master intended to lodge all night. Then they closed and
locked fast the doores about me, and kept the chamber round, till such
time as they thought that the pestilent rage of madnesse had killed me.
When I was thus shutte in the chamber alone, I laid me downe upon the
bed to sleepe, considering it was long time past, since I lay and tooke
my rest as a man doth. When morning was come, and that I was well
reposed, I rose up lustily. In the meane season, they which were
appointed to watch about the chamber all night, reasoned with
themselves in this sort, Verely (quoth one) I think that this rude Asse
be dead. So think I (quoth another) for the outragious poyson of
madness hath killed him, but being thus in divers opinions of a poore
Ass, they looked through a crevis, and espied me standing still, sober
and quiet in the middle of the chamber; then they opened the doores,
and came towards me, to prove whether I were gentle or no. Amongst whom
there was one, which in my opinion, was sent from Heaven to save my
life, that willed the other to set a bason of faire water before me,
and thereby they would know whether I were mad or no, for if I did
drinke without feare as I accustomed to do, it was a signe that I was
whole, and in mine Assie wits, where contrary if I did flie and abhorre
the tast of the water, it was evident proofe of my madness, which thing
he said that he had read in ancient and credible books, whereupon they
tooke a bason of cleere water, and presented it before me: but I as
soone as I perceived the wholesome water of my life, ran incontinently,
thrusting my head into the bason, drank as though I had beene greatly
athirst; then they stroked me with their hands, and bowed mine eares,
and tooke me by the halter, to prove my patience, but I taking each
thing in good part, disproved their mad presumption, by my meeke and
gentle behaviour: when I was thus delivered from this double danger,
the next day I was laded againe with the goddesse Siria, and other
trumpery, and was brought into the way with Trumpets and Cymbals to beg
in the villages which we passed by according to our custome. And after
that we had gone through a few towns and Castles, we fortuned to come
to a certaine village, which was builded (as the inhabitants there
affirme) upon the foundation of a famous ancient Citie. And after that
we had turned into the next Inne, we heard of a prettie jest committed
in the towne there, which I would that you should know likewise.