How Apuleius carried away the Gentlewoman, and how they were taken
againe by the theeves, and what a kind of death was invented for them.
By and by the theeves came home laden with treasure, and many of them
which were of strongest courage (leaving behind such as were lame and
wounded, to heale and aire themselves) said they would returne backe
againe to fetch the rest of their pillage, which they had hidden in a
certaine cave, and so they snatched up their dinner greedily, and
brought us forth into the way and beate us before them with staves.
About night (after that we had passed over many hilles and dales) we
came to a great cave, where they laded us with mighty burthens, and
would not suffer us to refresh our selves any season but brought us
againe in our way, and hied so fast homeward, that what with their
haste and their cruell stripes, I fell downe upon a stone by the way
side, then they beate me pittifully in lifting me up, and hurt my right
thigh and my left hoofe, and one of them said, What shall we do with
this lame Ill favoured Asse, that is not worth the meate he eats? And
other said, Since the time that we had him first he never did any good,
and I thinke he came unto our house with evill lucke, for we have had
great wounds since, and losse of our valiant captaines, and other said,
As soone as he hath brought home his burthen, I will surely throw him
out upon the mountaine to be a pray for wild beasts: While these
gentlemen reasoned together of my death, we fortuned to come home, for
the feare that I was in, caused my feet to turne into wings: after that
we were discharged of our burthens, they went to their fellowes that
were wounded, and told them of our great tardity and slownesse by the
way, neither was I brought into small anguish, when I perceived my
death prepared before my face: Why standest thou still Lucius? Why dost
thou not looke for thy death? Knowst thou not that the theeves have
ordained to slay thee? seest thou not these sharpe and pointed flints
which shall bruise and teare thee in peeces, if by adventure thou
happen upon them? Thy gentle Magitian hath not onely given thee the
shape and travell of an Asse, but also a skinne so soft and tender as
it were a swallow: why dost thou not take courage and runne away to
save thy selfe? Art thou afraid of the old woman more then halfe dead,
whom with a stripe of thy heele thou maist easily dispatch? But whither
shall I fly? What lodging shall I seek? See my Assy cogitation. Who is
he that passeth by the way and will not take me up? While I devised
these things, I brake the halter wherewith I was tyed and ran away with
all my force, howbeit I could not escape the kitish eyes of the old
woman, for shee ran after me, and with more audacity then becommeth her
kind age, caught me by the halter and thought to pull me home: but I
not forgetting the cruell purpose of the theeves, was mooved with small
pity, for I kicked her with my hinder heeles to the ground and had
welnigh slaine her, who (although shee was throwne and hurled downe)
yet shee held still the halter, and would not let me goe; then shee
cryed with a loud voyce and called for succour, but she little
prevayled, because there was no person that heard her, save onely the
captive gentlewoman, who hearing the voice of the old woman, came out
to see what the matter was, and perceiving her hanging at the halter,
tooke a good courage and wrested it out of her hand, and (entreating me
with gentle words) got upon my backe. Then I began to runne, and shee
gently kicked mee forward, whereof I was nothing displeased, for I had
as great a desire to escape as shee: insomuch that I seemed to scowre
away like a horse. And when the Gentlewoman did speake, I would answere
her with my neighing, and oftentimes (under colour to rub my backe) I
would sweetly kisse her tender feet. Then shee fetching a sigh from the
bottome of her heart, lifted up her eyes to the heavens, saying: O
soveraigne Gods, deliver mee if it be your pleasure, from these present
dangers: and thou cruell fortune cease thy wrath, let the sorrow
suffice thee which I have already sustained. And thou little Asse, that
art the occasion of my safety and liberty, if thou canst once render me
safe and sound to my parents, and to him that so greatly desireth to
have me to his wife, thou shalt see what thankes I will give: with what
honour I will reward thee, and how I will use thee. First, I will
bravely dresse the haires of thy forehead, and then will I finely combe
thy maine, I will tye up thy rugged tayle trimly, I will decke thee
round about with golden trappes, in such sort that thou shalt glitter
like the starres of the skie, I will bring thee daily in my apron the
kirnels of nuts, and will pamper thee up with delicates; I will set
store by thee, as by one that is the preserver of my life: Finally,
thou shalt lack no manner of thing. Moreover amongst thy glorious fare,
thy great ease, and the blisse of thy life, thou shalt not be destitute
of dignity, for thou shalt be chronicled perpetually in memory of my
present fortune, and the providence divine. All the whole history shall
be painted upon the wall of our house, thou shalt be renowned
throughout all the world. And it shall be registred in the bookes of
Doctours, that an Asse saved the life of a young maiden that was
captive amongst Theeves: Thou shalt be numbred amongst the ancient
miracles: wee beleeve that by like example of truth Phryxus saved
himselfe from drowning upon the Ram, Arion escaped upon a Dolphin, and
that Europa was delivered by the Bull. If Jupiter transformed himselfe
into a Bull, why may it not be that under the shape of this Asse, is
hidden the figure of a man, or some power divine? While that the Virgin
did thus sorrowfully unfold her desires, we fortuned to come to a place
where three wayes did meet, and shee tooke me by the halter, and would
have me to turne on the right hand to her fathers house: but I (knowing
that the theeves were gone that way to fetch the residue of their
pillage) resisted with my head as much as I might, saying within my
selfe: What wilt thou doe unhappy maiden? Why wouldst thou goe so
willingly to hell? Why wilt thou runne into destruction by meane of my
feet? Why dost thou seek thine own harme, and mine likewise? And while
we strived together whether way we might take, the theeves returned,
laiden with their pray, and perceived us a farre off by the light of
the Moon: and after they had known us, one of them gan say, Whither goe
you so hastely? Be you not afraid of spirits? And you (you harlot) doe
you not goe to see your parents? Come on, we will beare you company?
And therewithall they tooke me by the hatter, and drave me backe
againe, beating me cruelly with a great staffe (that they had) full of
knobs: then I returning againe to my ready destruction, and remembering
the griefe of my hoofe, began to shake my head, and to waxe lame, but
he that led me by the halter said, What, dost thou stumble? Canst thou
not goe? These rotten feet of thine ran well enough, but they cannot
walke: thou couldest mince it finely even now with the gentlewoman,
that thou seemedst to passe the horse Pegasus in swiftnesse. In saying
of these words they beat mee againe, that they broke a great staffe
upon mee. And when we were come almost home, we saw the old woman
hanging upon a bow of a Cipresse tree; then one of them cut downe the
bowe whereon shee hanged, and cast her into the bottome of a great
ditch: after this they bound the maiden and fell greedily to their
victuals, which the miserable old woman had prepared for them. At which
time they began to devise with themselves of our death, and how they
might be revenged; divers was the opinions of this divers number: the
first said, that hee thought best the Mayd should be burned alive: the
second said she should be throwne out to wild beasts: the third said,
she should be hanged upon a gibbet: the fourth said she should be flead
alive: thus was the death of the poore Maiden scanned betweene them
foure. But one of the theeves after every man had declared his
judgement, did speake in this manner: it is not convenient unto the
oath of our company, to suffer you to waxe more cruell then the quality
of the offence doth merit, for I would that shee should not be hanged
nor burned, nor throwne to beasts, nor dye any sodaine death, but by my
council I would have her punished according to her desert. You know
well what you have determined already of this dull Asse, that eateth
more then he is worth, that faineth lamenesse, and that was the cause
of the flying away of the Maid: my mind is that he shall be slaine to
morrow, and when all the guts and entrailes of his body is taken out,
let the Maide be sowne into his belly, then let us lay them upon a
great stone against the broiling heate of the Sunne, so they shall both
sustaine all the punishments which you have ordained: for first the
Asse shall be slaine as you have determined, and she shall have her
members torne and gnawn with wild beasts, when as she is bitten and
rent with wormes, shee shall endure the paine of the fire, when as the
broyling heat of the Sunne shall scortch and parch the belly of the
Asse, shee shall abide the gallows when the Dogs and Vultures shall
have the guts of her body hanging in their ravenous mouthes. I pray you
number all the torments which she shall suffer: First shee shall dwell
within the paunch of an Asse: secondly her nosethrilles shall receive a
carraine stinke of the beast: thirdly shee shall dye for hunger: last
of all, shee shall finde no meane to ridde her selfe from her paines,
for her hand shalt be sowen up within the skinne of the Asse: This
being said, all the Theeves consented, and when I (poore Asse) heard
and understood all their device, I did nothing else but lament and
bewayle my dead carkasse, which should be handled in such sort on the
next morrow.