to take his hat and cane; but, instead of going to the yard, he headed
for the front door, crying:
"There go two of them into the road! I'll run after them."
"Do you think so?"
"I saw them."
"How could they have got out?"
"Under the gate. They scratched till they made a hole. But don't be
disturbed; I'll catch them, if I have to chase them to Vincennes!"
And Cherami ran out into the road, leaving the ladies and the servant to
hunt the rabbits.
LIII
CHERAMI'S SECONDS
Cherami went across fields to the village of Bagnolet, thence to
Belleville, and returned to his domicile, consigning the Capucine family
and its rabbits to the evil one.
"No seconds," he said to himself, as he went to bed; "and the count's
will be here at ten o'clock to-morrow! No matter; let's go to sleep; it
will be light to-morrow."
At seven o'clock, Cherami rose, dressed, and went to his window. It was
just daylight, and Rue de l'Orillon was deserted. About eight o'clock, a
water-carrier's cart came along. It stopped in front of Madame
Louchard's house, and the master carrier and his man came upstairs with
their pails.
Cherami opened his door, and scrutinized the two men closely as they
came up.
"There are two stout fellows," he mused. "Sapristi! such seconds would
just do for my affair! Why not? Pardieu! by making a slight sacrifice;
and this is no time for economizing, but for going through with my duel
in a dignified way. Gad! I am inclined to think that it's a good idea; I
see no other way of obtaining seconds."
Cherami waited for the two men to come down the stairs; he stopped them
as they passed, asked them into his room, and said to them:
"I have a favor to ask of you, messieurs."
The master, a tall, robust Auvergnat, replied, in the accent of his
province:
"A pail to fill?"
"No."
"Do you want some water?"
"It is something out of your regular line. It will be a change for you."
"We must serve our customers."
"Listen to me first. If your customers should be served a little later
than usual for once, it won't kill them. I have a duel to arrange for.
Do you know what a duel is?"
"It's a clock that strikes the hours, ain't it?"
"You are a long way off."
The apprentice, a young Piedmontese, nearly six feet tall, suddenly
exclaimed:
"Yes, yes, I know the vendetta, basta! I've seen friends who'd been out
to fight with fists."
"Your young man understands rather better; yes, a duel's a fight, but
not with fists."
"Where do you fight?" rejoined the Piedmontese.
Cherami made a wry face, muttering:
"Sapristi! I prefer the Auvergnat accent to that jargon.--Look you,
messieurs, I just want you to be my seconds; I expect my opponent's
seconds here at ten o'clock, and you must both be here then. I will give
you a hundred sous each for the morning; and you will be free at
half-past ten; for the fight will not come off till to-morrow, I fancy."
"All right! five francs; all right!"
"What have we got to do?"
"In the first place, my boy, you will be good enough not to speak at
all; for you have a way of pronouncing your t's and s's which will
produce a very bad effect. Your master can say that you're a Pole, and
that you don't know a word of French. That's your role, then--to say
nothing. But I must dress you, my friends; I can't have seconds in short
jackets. Do you own a coat, my boy?"
"No, but I've got a much better jacket."
"I don't want seconds in jackets. My landlady must have some coats that
belonged to her late husband; we will get one of them. Have you a hat?"
"I have a new cap."
"How you run your words together! We'll find a hat somewhere in the
house.--And you, master--what's your name?"
"Michel."
"Good! well, Michel, have you any good clothes?"
"_Dame!_ I should say so; my new frock-coat--only three years old--which
comes down to my heels."
"Then I'll make an old soldier of you. You must put on a black stock. Go
and dress. Put your cask in a safe place, and come back at once with
your man, whom I will dress. Be here at half-past nine, and I will tell
you what you have to do; it will be very simple. You will agree to
whatever is proposed by the men who come here."
"We will agree, if they'll pay for something to drink."
"There's no question of taking anything to drink. However, I shall be
here; I'll prompt you. Go, and make haste."
"And the five francs?"
"Here they are; I pay in advance; you see that I have confidence in
you."
"Oh! never fear; our word's sacred.--Come, Piedmontese. Let's go and
take care of the cask."
"Where'll you put it?"
"In the next yard."
The water-carriers departed, and Cherami went down to his landlady.
"Have you a man's hat to loan me for this morning and to-morrow?" he
asked her.
"A man's hat? What do you want it for?"
"Don't be alarmed; I don't propose to make an omelet in it, as the
prestidigitators do; I want it for someone to wear."
"Yes, I have a hat that belonged to Louchard, which I am keeping to give
my godson when he grows up."
"Do me the favor to loan it to me; I will take the best of care of it."
"I trust you will."
Madame Louchard left the room, and soon returned with a felt hat in
reasonably good condition.
"Look; I call that rather fine, myself!"
"The devil! it's gray."
"Well! it's all the more stylish."
"I don't say it isn't, in summer; but in November gray hats are not worn
much."
"If you don't want it, leave it."
"Never mind; I'll take it. A Pole may like gray hats at all seasons.
Now, Madame Louchard, I must have either an overcoat or a frock-coat."
"I have nothing but a green sack-coat of Louchard's, which I also intend
for my godson."
"A sack-coat! that's risky, because it shows the trousers! But, no
matter! give it to me."
"You'll be responsible for it?"
"I'll be responsible for everything."
Cherami returned to his room with the clothes; at half-past nine, the
water-carriers appeared. The Auvergnat wore a long blue overcoat that
reached to his heels, a collar that came to the bottom of his ears, and
a three-cornered hat. He was a perfect type of a laundryman going out to
dinner. The Piedmontese was still in his jacket; but he had on a white
striped waistcoat and olive-green trousers. Cherami bade him put on the
green coat, which was too short in front and showed half of the
waistcoat. By way of compensation, the late Louchard evidently had an
enormous head, for the gray hat came down so far that it almost
concealed the young water-carrier's eyes. These preparations completed,
Cherami, having examined his two seconds, exclaimed:
"What in the devil will they take you for? However, damn the odds!--You,
Piedmontese, will bow whenever anyone speaks to you, but you must not
say a word in reply."
"Never fear! what would I say to them, anyway?"
"Very good! You are Monsieur de Chamousky, a Polish nobleman."
"No; for I was born in Piedmont."
"Hold your tongue; I make you a Pole!--You, Michel, are a wealthy
land-holder from Auvergne; at all events, you will be rightfully
entitled to your accent."
"Yes, yes, I have some land at home, and all planted with chestnuts."
"The gentlemen who are coming will tell you what weapons the count
proposes to fight with, also the time and place; to whatever they
propose, you will reply: 'Very well, we agree.'--Do you understand?"
"Pardi! that ain't very hard: 'Very well; that hits us!'"
"I didn't say: 'That hits us,' but: 'We agree.'"
"Bah! it amounts to the same thing."
"No, no! Sacrebleu! it doesn't amount to the same thing! Don't you go
making mistakes; no foolishness! Ah! mon Dieu! I hear a carriage
stopping in front of the house; two gentlemen are getting out--they are
the ones. Attention! I leave the door unlocked, so that they can open it
themselves. I go into this little dark closet for a moment; I want them
to think that I have more than this one room. Now: a serious face, heads
up, and be cool!"
Cherami disappeared. The two water-carriers stared at each other in
speechless amazement to see themselves so finely arrayed. Soon there was
a knock at the door; then, as no one answered, the door was opened, and
Monsieur de la Beriniere's two seconds entered the room.
One was a man of some fifty years, tall and thin, with a decidedly
unamiable manner, a rigid bearing, and a severely simple costume. The
other, who was at least fifteen years younger, with a pleasant face, and
dressed in the height of fashion, had all the manners of a modern Don
Juan. He entered the room first, and, having glanced about, exclaimed:
"This isn't the place; it can't be; the woman directed us wrong."
"But there are some people here," said the other; "we had better
inquire.--Monsieur Cherami, if you please?" he continued, addressing the
Auvergnat, who stood in the centre of the room.
The water-carrier buried his chin in his cravat, and answered, without
hesitation:
"Very well; we agree."
The old gentleman turned to his companion, who said:
"He did not understand you."--Whereupon he, in his turn, addressed the
Auvergnat: "We desire to know, monsieur, if this is where Monsieur
Cherami lives."
Again Michel replied in his deep voice:
"Very well; we agree."
At that, the young man burst out laughing.
"Gad!" he exclaimed; "this is evidently a joke, a wager! What do you
think about it, Monsieur de Maugrille?"
"I think that we did not come here to joke, and if I knew that there was
any purpose to make fools of us----"
Cherami, who was listening, and saw that his seconds were in a fair way
to wreck the whole business, hastily left the closet, and saluted the
new-comers with much courtesy, saying:
"Pardon, messieurs, a thousand pardons! I crave a little indulgence for
my seconds,--most respectable persons, by the way,--one of whom, being a
Pole, recently arrived in France, is not able as yet to express his
thoughts in our language. As for the other, Monsieur de Saint-Michel, a
wealthy land-holder in the outskirts of Clermont, in Auvergne--he is not
yet at home in all the details of affairs of this sort. However,
messieurs, as I have determined in advance to agree to what Monsieur de
la Beriniere may suggest, it seems to me that your mission is very much
simplified, and that the affair will settle itself; my seconds are here
only as a matter of form."
"Ordinarily, monsieur, the details of a meeting are not arranged with
the adversary himself, but with his seconds."
"I know it, monsieur. Pardieu! you cannot teach me how affairs are
managed in duels; this isn't the first time I have fought."
"In that case, monsieur," queried the younger man, with a smile, "why
did you select seconds who apparently have no understanding of what is
going on?"
"Because I found no others at hand, in all probability," retorted
Cherami, biting his lips wrathfully. "Come, messieurs, let us come to
terms. Is it such a difficult matter, pray, to tell us where, when, and
how the count proposes to fight?"
"I beg your pardon, monsieur," observed Monsieur de Maugrille; "but, as
I, for my part, insist that everything shall be done in accordance with
the established etiquette of duels, I will tell your seconds, and no one
else."
"Tell my concierge, if you choose; it makes confounded little difference
to me, after all."
"What does that tone mean, monsieur?"
"It means that you make me very weary with all your nonsense; and if
you're not satisfied with the tone I adopt, why, I'll give you
satisfaction as soon as I have done with the count; or before, if you
choose."
"Monsieur!"
The discussion was on the verge of ending in a quarrel, when the
Auvergnat, seeing that things seemed to be approaching a crisis, shouted
in stentorian tones:
"Very well, _fouchtra!_ very well! We agree, I say!"
This outburst was delivered in such unique fashion by the water-carrier,
that the younger of the count's seconds roared with laughter again, and
Cherami himself could not keep a sober face. He turned his back and put
his handkerchief to his mouth. The old gentleman alone retained an air
of displeasure; but his young companion said to him earnestly:
"Come, Monsieur de Maugrille, let us not have trouble over an affair
which really seems to me quite simple.--Monsieur de la Beriniere selects
swords; he wishes to fight to-morrow, about nine o'clock, in Vincennes
Forest; we will meet at the entrance to the forest, near Porte
Saint-Mande, on the highroad. Those are our conditions, messieurs; are
they satisfactory to you?"
Then or never was the time for the water-carrier to repeat the phrase he
had been taught; but, just as it frequently happens on the stage, that,
when an actor has begun his lines too soon, he is silent when he ought
to speak, so did the Auvergnat look stolidly at the others and utter
never a word.
Cherami, who was gazing at him impatiently, at last walked up behind him
and struck him in the side, crying:
"Well, Monsieur de Saint-Michel, have you suddenly lost your voice?"
"Ah! bless my soul! what was I thinking about?--Very well, very well! We
agree to everything," said the water-carrier.
Thereupon the young man took his companion's arm and led him from the
room, laughing still, and saying in his ear:
"I think that we may retire, now that everything is settled."
Cherami saluted them, and escorted them to the door.
"Be sure, monsieur," he said, "that we shall be on hand promptly at the
rendezvous; we shall not keep you waiting. By the way! it will be very
kind of you to bring swords for both, for I broke mine recently and
have not yet replaced it."
"Very good, monsieur; we will do so."
The younger man bowed with much affability; his older associate bent his
head almost imperceptibly, retaining his ill-humored expression; then
they left the house and returned to their carriage.
LIV
TWO!
"Sapristi!" cried Cherami, when the count's witnesses had gone; "I
thought that we weren't going to get out of that hole; they had
difficulty in swallowing my seconds, and I don't wonder."
"Ain't you satisfied with us?" inquired the water-carrier; "I should say
that I said just what you told me to."
"That is to say, you said it when you shouldn't have, and held your
tongue when you should have answered."
"I didn't say a single word," observed the Piedmontese.
"It's lucky you didn't! That would have been the last straw! Well,
that's all for to-day; you may go back to your cask; but be here
to-morrow at half-past seven sharp, dressed just the same; don't forget
it!"
"For five francs more apiece?"
"Of course, as that's what we agreed."
"We won't fail."
The next day, the two water-carriers appeared at seven o'clock, each in
his costume of the preceding day: the Piedmontese in the late Louchard's
green sack-coat and gray hat, which he was obliged to push up from his
face every minute, so that he could see where he was going. Cherami
dressed in haste; he paid particular attention to his toilet, which
presented a striking contrast to that of his two seconds; then he
requested his landlady to send for a cab. Madame Louchard was much
disturbed when she recognized the coat and hat of her deceased husband
on the water-carrier.
"Why have you rigged that fellow up like that?" she asked her tenant.
"He'll just ruin my husband's things. I wouldn't have lent 'em to you,
if I'd known you wanted 'em for him. Are you going to a wedding so early
in the morning?"
"Widow Louchard, I will be responsible for your chattels--don't bother
us! Your man's cast-off clothes are more fortunate than they deserve, to
be present at such a festivity.--Get in, messieurs."
Cherami pushed the water-carrier and his man into the cab, and shouted
to the driver to take them to Porte Saint-Mande; then, taking a seat
beside his seconds, he said to them:
"Listen carefully to my instructions for this morning, and, ten thousand
cigars! try not to make any mistakes; I am going to fight with a third
gentleman, whom you didn't see yesterday."
"Ah! you ought to fight with your fists; that's our way; we're good
hands at it; eh, Piedmontese?"
"Yes, just let me get a crack at 'em! I'd like that better than to stand
and say nothing, like a stuffed goose!"
"Nevertheless, you must make up your mind to that, my boy. I didn't
bring you with me to fight, but to be my seconds. I am to fight with a
sword. You will simply measure the two swords, to make sure that they're
of the same length."
"What with? I didn't bring a rule."
"You measure two swords by putting them side by side. It's simple
enough."
"And must I say again: 'Very well; we agree'?"
"No, there's no need of it. You must say: 'Everything is ready, let them
proceed.' If I am wounded, you will bring me back to this cab, which
will wait for us, and take me home. If it's the other who is
wounded,--and it will be,--you will help his seconds to take him to his
carriage. Do you understand?"
"That's all right."
They arrived at Porte Saint-Mande, where they alighted from the cab and
walked into the woods. It was a cold, dull morning; it was not nine
o'clock, and they met nobody.
"We are ahead of time," said Cherami, "but I prefer to be. Above all
things, my boys, be very polite to the men we are waiting for: take your
hats off and bow, and don't put them on again till after they do."
"What if they don't put 'em on at all?"
"Never fear--they will. Now, we have nothing to do but walk back and
forth and wait."
"Why don't we go and take a glass of wine at the nearest inn, while we
wait?"
"_Dame!_" said the apprentice; "I'm with you for a glass of wine!"
"But I am not with you, not by any means, messieurs. After the fight,
you shall drink as much as you please, but not before."
"We might treat the others to a glass when they come; that's polite, you
know!"
"The gentlemen who are coming don't drink at wine-shops!--No fool's
tricks, sacrebleu! or you'll compromise me! But, see! that carriage
coming along the road yonder is probably bringing our adversaries. It's
a private carriage--the count's, no doubt. Yes, those are they.
Attention, my seconds! Well, well, what in the devil are you doing?
Taking off your hats before the gentlemen have left their carriage!"
"You told us to be polite."
"I didn't tell you to bow to the horses."
The count and his seconds alighted and came toward Cherami. The
grotesque aspect of the latter's attendants seemed greatly to amuse
Monsieur de la Beriniere, who could not take his eyes from the two
water-carriers. They, at a sign from Cherami, hastily removed their hats
when the new-comers were close at hand. But the Piedmontese, in his
eagerness to uncover, forgot that his hat was too large for him, and
struck Monsieur de Maugrille in the nose with it, that gentleman
happening to be directly in front of him.
The old gentleman made an angry gesture. But the tall youth, as he
picked up his hat, cried:
"Excuse me! I didn't do it a-purpose! it slipped out of my hand."
The count glanced at his seconds. They looked at Cherami. And he, hardly
able to resist the temptation to plant his foot in the apprentice's
posterior, struggled to restrain himself, as he said:
"Monsieur is a Pole; he speaks French very badly! indeed, he fairly
murders it."
"So we observe," rejoined the count, with a smile. "But it's none too
warm here, and I am anxious to have done with this affair. It seems to
me that we shall be very well placed behind this low wall."
"I agree with you, monsieur le comte."
They walked a short distance, and halted behind a wall which would serve
to conceal the combatants from any chance passers-by. While the
principals removed their coats, the younger of the count's seconds
handed to the water-carrier two swords which he carried out of sight
under his overcoat. The Auvergnat measured them so long that Cherami
went to him and took one out of his hands.
"They're all right!" he exclaimed; "they're exactly alike! I will take
this one, unless monsieur le comte prefers it."
But Monsieur de la Beriniere at once took the other, while his older
second grumbled:
"In God's name, who are these two idiots of seconds who know absolutely
nothing as to what they are doing?"
Cherami at once stood on guard, saying:
"At your service, monsieur le comte, whenever you choose."
"I am here, monsieur."
Monsieur de la Beriniere had been a very good fencer in his youth, but
years had impaired his agility and strength. It was easy to see that
Cherami was sparing his adversary, to whom he observed, as he parried
his thrusts:
"Well done, monsieur le comte! very pretty work, indeed! You must have
been a fine fencer formerly."
But these compliments, instead of flattering the count, stung and
irritated him, because he saw that his opponent was playing with him;
and he suddenly cried:
"What the devil! in God's name, monsieur, attack! you confine yourself
to parrying! Do you think you're fighting with a novice?"
"Is that your wish, monsieur le comte? Solely to comply then----"
And Cherami, suddenly striking down his adversary's sword, plunged his
own into the count's right side.
Monsieur de la Beriniere staggered a moment, then fell.
"_Fouchtra!_ he's got his reckoning!" cried the Auvergnat, while the
count's witnesses ran forward to help him and carry him off the field.
But, at a sign from Cherami, the tall Piedmontese lifted the wounded man
in his arms as if he were a child, and carried him to the elegant
equipage, in which a surgeon was waiting, who had come with the
gentlemen, but whom they had not thought it necessary to take with them
to the field of battle.
"There's one job done!" said the young water-carrier.
The count's seconds could hardly keep up with him. In the end, they
seated themselves by the wounded man's side in the carriage, which drove
away at a walk.
"The wound can't be dangerous," said Cherami to his seconds, when they
were alone; "it's in among the ribs. He will be laid up a fortnight or
three weeks, unless I touched some vital part. Ah! they forgot to take
away their sword. I will carry it back myself, and that will give me an
opportunity to inquire for the count."
"Ah! _fouchtra!_ you're a smart one! how you run on!"
"Now it's all over, ain't we going to have a glass of wine at the
nearest wine-shop, to refresh us?"
"My boys, here's a hundred sous for each of you. Go and refresh
yourselves all you choose; I am going to take the cab and go home. Do
you prefer to ride back?"
"No, no! Riding makes us sick; eh, Piedmontese?"
"Yes, yes, I prefer to walk."
"But don't forget, my boys, to bring that coat and gray hat back to
Madame Louchard."
"Don't you be afraid; we're just going to have a little fun with our
hundred sous."
"Have all the fun you can, my boys. Good-day!"
"Say, Monsieur Cherami, you're satisfied with us, ain't you? We did what
you wanted us to."
"Yes, my friends, I am very well satisfied.--But God preserve me from
ever having you as seconds again!" added Cherami, as he drove away.
LV
CHERAMI CHANGES HIS TACTICS
On the day after the duel, Cherami, concealing under his coat the sword
which had been loaned to him the day before, betook himself to the
count's abode and asked the concierge how his master was. The concierge
replied, with a profound sigh:
"Would you believe, monsieur, that, in spite of his years--for although
monsieur le comte dresses like a young man, it's easy to see that he
isn't one; his valet tells me he's past sixty--well, in spite of his
years, he fought a duel yesterday."
"A man fights a duel when the occasion arises; there's no prescribed
term for that."
"No, monsieur; no, a man doesn't fight--and with swords, above all--when
his wrist is no longer firm; and it seems that Monsieur de la
Beriniere's opponent was a great, tall rascal--a professional--one of
those fellows who pass their time fighting. A fine profession!"
Cherami pushed the sword still farther under his coat, stared at the
concierge as if he would swallow him, and said in a sharp tone:
"Your reflections tire me; I am going up to the count's apartments."
"But, monsieur, you can't go up; monsieur le comte is very badly
wounded, so it seems. He is forbidden to read or talk."
"I don't mean to speak to him, but to his valet, who isn't so much of an
ass as you, I trust."
And Cherami rapidly ascended the stairs, opened the door of the
reception-room by turning the knob, and found there the valet, who knew
him. He handed him the sword, saying:
"Here, my friend, is a sword which your master loaned to the person with
whom he fought yesterday, and which that person requested me to return
to him, and at the same time to inquire as to his condition. Is the
count's wound dangerous?"