There's many a slip
'Twixt the race and the tip.
* * * * *
[Illustration: "LAST, BUT NOT LEAST"
"Why do you call him a good jockey! He never rides a winner." "That just
proves it. He can finish last on the best horse in the race!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: IN SEARCH OF A "CERTAINTY."--_Cautious Gambler._ "Four to
one be blowed! I want a chaunce of gettin' a bit for my money."
_Bookmaker._ "Tell you what you want. You ought to join a burial
society. Sure to get somethin' out o' that!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: AN ECHO FROM EPSOM.--"Wot's the matter, Chawley?"
"Matter! See that hinnercent babby there? 'E's got 'is pockets full o'
tin tacks!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH OUR GIRLS?
(_Why not give them a few lessons in the science of book-making?_)
_Mr. Professor._ "And now, ladies, having closed our book on the
favourite, and the betting being seven to three bar one, I will show you
how to work out the odds against the double event."]
* * * * *
[Illustration: COLD COMFORT.--Scene--_Badly beaten horse walking in with
crowd. First Sporting Gent (to second ditto, who has plunged
disastrously on his advice)._ "Told yer he was a foregorne conclusion
for this race, did I? Well, and what more d'yer want? Ain't he jolly
well the conclusion of it?"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: DERBY DAY. DOWN THE ROAD.--Matches that strike upon the
box.]
* * * * *