_On being asked to play Croquet, A.D. 1894._
["It is impossible to visit any part of the country without
realising the fact that the long-discredited game of Croquet is
fast coming into vogue again.... This is partly owing to the
abolition of 'tight croqueting.'"--_Pall Mall Gazette._]
Eh? What? Why? How?
Are we back in the Sixties again?
I am rubbing my eyes--is it _then_, or now?
I'm a _Rip Van Winkle_, it's plain!
Hoop, Ball, Stick, Cage?
Eh, fetch them all out once more?
Why, look, they're begrimed and cracked with age,
And their playing days are o'er!
Well--yes--here goes
For a primitive chaste delight!
Let us soberly, solemnly beat our foes,
For Croquet's no longer "tight"!
[Illustration]
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[Illustration: CHARLES KEENESQUE CROQUET PERIOD. 1866]
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[Illustration: AN OBJECTIONABLE OLD MAN.--_Young Ladies._ "Going to make
a flower-bed here, Smithers? Why, it'll quite spoil our croquet ground!"
_Gardener._ "Well, that's yer Pa's orders, Miss! He'll hev' it laid out
for 'orticultur', not for 'usbandry'".]
* * * * *
[Illustration: SWEET DELUSION.--_Chorus of Young Ladies_ (_speaking
technically_). "No _spooning_, Mr. Lovel! No _spooning_ allowed _here_!"
_Miss Tabitha_ (_with the long curls_). "Those naughty, _n-n-naughty_
girls! I suppose they allude to you and me, Mr. Lovel. But, lor'! never
mind them!--_I_ don't."]
* * * * *
[Illustration: SO READY!--_Snooks_ (_coming out conversationally_). "I
think that every woman who is not out-and-out plain considers herself a
beauty." _Miss Rinkle._ "Does that include _me_?" _Snooks._ "Oh, of
course not!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE MOMENTOUS QUESTION
_Eligible Bachelor._ "Shall I follow you up, Annie; or leave myself for
Lizzie?"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: [According to _Country Life_, Croquet, which was revived
last summer, is likely to increase in popularity this year. A splendid
opportunity to revive the pastime and the costumes of the early sixties
at the same time.]
]
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