“IF I LOVED YOU!”
A singular pomp is sometimes associated with the announcement that my
Lord Pedigree, or Mister Nobody has ‘had the honour of dining’ with
their Majesties the King and Queen. Outsiders read the thrilling line
with awe and envy,--and many of them are foolish enough to wish that
they also were Lords Pedigree or Misters Nobody. As a matter of sad and
sober fact, however, a dinner with royal personages is an extremely
dull affair. ‘Do not speak unless you are spoken to,’ is a rule which,
however excellent and necessary in Court etiquette, is apt to utterly
quench conversation, and render the brightest spirits dull and inert.
The silent and solemn movements of the Court flunkeys,--the painful
attitudes of those who are _not_ ‘spoken to’; the eager yet laboured
smiles of those who _are_ ‘spoken to ‘;--the melancholy efforts at
gaiety--the dread of trespassing on tabooed subjects--these things tend
to make all but the most independent and unfettered minds shrink from
such an ordeal as the ‘honour’ of dining with kings. It must, however,
be conceded that the kings themselves are fully aware of the tediousness
of their dinner parties, and would lighten the boredom if they could;
but etiquette forbids. The particular monarch whose humours are the
subject of this ‘plain unvarnished’ history would have liked nothing
better than to be allowed to dine in simplicity and peace without his
conversation being noted, and without having a flunkey at hand to watch
every morsel of food go into his mouth. He would have liked to eat
freely, talk freely, and conduct himself generally with the ease of a
private gentleman.
All this being denied to him, he hated the dinner-hour as ardently as
he hated receiving illuminated addresses, and the freedom of cities. Yet
all things costly and beautiful were combined to make his royal table a
picture which would have pleased the eyes and taste of a Marguerite de
Valois. On the evening of the day on which he had determined, as he
had said to himself, to ‘begin to reign,’ it looked more than usually
attractive. Some trifling chance had made the floral decorations more
tasteful--some amiable humour of the providence which rules daily
events, had ordained that two or three of the prettiest Court ladies
should be present;--Prince Humphry and his two brothers, Rupert and
Cyprian, were at table,--and though conversation was slow and scant, the
picturesqueness of the scene was not destroyed by silence. The apartment
which was used as a private dining-room when their Majesties had no
guests save the members of their own household, was in itself a gem of
art and architecture,--it had been designed and painted from floor to
ceiling by one of the most famous of the dead and gone masters, and its
broad windows opened out on a white marble loggia fronting the ocean,
where festoons of flowers clambered and hung, in natural tufts and
trails of foliage and blossom, mingling their sweet odours with the
fresh scent of the sea. Amid all the glow and delicacy of colour, the
crowning perfection of the perfect environment was the Queen-Consort,
lovelier in her middle-age than most women in their teens. An exquisite
figure of stateliness and dignity, robed in such hues and adorned with
such jewels as best suited her statuesque beauty, and attended by ladies
of whose more youthful charms she was never envious, having indeed no
cause for envy, she was a living defiance to the ravages of time, and
graced her royal husband’s dinner-table with the same indifferent
ease as she graced his throne, unchanging in the dazzling light of her
physical faultlessness. He, looking at her with mingled impatience
and sadness, almost wished she would grow older in appearance with her
years, and lose that perfect skin, white as alabaster,--that
glittering but cold luminance of eye. For experience had taught him the
worthlessness of beauty unaccompanied by tenderness, and fair faces had
no longer the first attraction for him. His eldest son, Prince Humphry,
bore a strong resemblance to himself,--he was tall and slim, with a fine
face, and a well-built muscular figure; the other two younger princes,
Rupert and Cyprian, aged respectively eighteen and sixteen, were like
their mother,--beautiful in form and feature, but as indifferent to all
tenderness of thought and sentiment as they were full of splendid health
and vigour. And, despite the fact that the composition and surroundings
of his household were, to all outward appearances, as satisfactory as a
man in his position could expect them to be, the King was intellectually
and spiritually aware of the emptiness of the shell he called ‘home.’
Love was lacking; his beautiful wife was the ice-wall against which all
waves of feeling froze as they fell into the stillness of death. His
sons had been born as the foals of a racing stud might be born,--merely
to continue the line of blood and succession. They were not the dear
offspring of passion or of tenderness. The coldness of their mother’s
nature was strongly engendered in them, and so far they had never shown
any particular affection for their parents. The princes Rupert and
Cyprian thought of nothing all day but sports and games of skill; they
studied serious tasks unwillingly, and found their position as sons of
the reigning monarch, irksome, and even ridiculous. They had caught the
infection of that diseased idea which in various exaggerated forms is
tending to become more or less universal, and to work great mischief to
nations,--namely, that ‘sport’ is more important than policy, and that
all matters relating to ‘sport,’ are more worth attention than wisdom in
government. Of patriotism, or love of country they had none; and laughed
to scorn the grand old traditions and sentiments of national glory and
honour, which had formerly inspired the poets of their land to many
a wild and beautiful chant of battle or of victory. How to pass the
day--how best to amuse themselves--this was their first thought on
waking every morning,--football, cricket, tennis and wrestling formed
their chief subjects of conversation; and though they had professors
and tutors of the most qualified and certificated ability, they made
no secret of their utter contempt for all learning and literature. They
were fine young animals; but did less with the brains bestowed upon them
than the working bee who makes provision of honey for the winter, or the
swallow that builds its nest under warmly sheltered eaves.
Prince Humphry, however, was of a different nature. From a shy, somewhat
unmanageable boy, he had developed into a quiet, dreamy youth, fond of
books, music, and romantic surroundings. He avoided the company of his
brothers whenever it was possible; their loud voices, boisterous spirits
and perpetual chatter concerning the champions of this or that race
or match, bored him infinitely, and he was at no pains to disguise his
boredom. During the last year he seemed to have grown up suddenly into
full manhood,--he had begun to assert his privileges as Heir-Apparent,
and to enjoy the freedom his position allowed him. Yet the manner of
his enjoyment was somewhat singular for a young man who formed a central
figure in the circle of the land’s Royalty,--he cared nothing at all
for the amusements and dissipations of the time; he merely showed an
abnormal love of solitude, which was highly unflattering to fashionable
society. It was on this subject that the King had decided to speak
with him,--and he watched him with closer attention than usual on this
particular evening when his habit of absenting himself all day in his
yacht had again excited comment. It was easy to see that the Prince had
been annoyed by the message Sir Roger de Launay had conveyed to him on
his arrival home,--a message to the effect that, as soon as dinner was
concluded, he was required to attend his Majesty in private; and all
through the stately and formal repast, his evident irritation and
impatience cast a shadow of vague embarrassment over the royal
party,--with the exception of the princes Rupert and Cyprian, who were
never embarrassed by anything, and who were more apt to be amused than
disquieted by the vexation of others. Welcome relief was at last given
by the serving of coffee,--and the Queen and all her ladies adjourned to
their own apartments. With their departure the rest of the circle soon
dispersed, there being no special guests present; and at a sign from
De Launay, Prince Humphry reluctantly followed his father into a small
private smoking-room adjacent to the open loggia, where the equerry,
bowing low, left the two together.
For a moment the King kept silence, while he chose a cigar from
the silver box on the table. Then, lighting it, he handed the box
courteously to his son.
“Will you smoke, Humphry?”
“Thanks, Sir,--no.”
The King seated himself; Prince Humphry remained standing.
“You had a favourable wind for your expedition today;” said the monarch
at last, beginning to smoke placidly--“I observe that The Islands appear
to have won special notice from you. What is the attraction? The climate
or the scenery?”
The Prince was silent.
“I like fine scenery myself,--” continued the King--“I also like a
change of air. But variation in both is always desirable,--and for this,
it is unwise to go to the same place every day!”
Still the Prince said nothing. His father looked up and studied his face
attentively, but could guess nothing from its enigmatical expression.
“You seem tongue-tied, Humphry!” he said--“Come, sit down! Let us talk
this out. Can you not trust me, your father, as a friend?”
“I wish I could!” answered the young man, half inaudibly.
“And can you not?”
“No. You have never loved me!”
The King drew his cigar from his mouth, and flicking off a morsel of
ash, looked at its end meditatively.
“Well--no!--I cannot say honestly that I have. Love,--it is a ridiculous
word, Humphry, but it has a meaning on certain occasions!--love for the
children of your mother is an impossibility!”
“Sir, I am not to blame for my mother’s disposition.”
“True--very true. You are not to blame. But you exist. And that you do
exist is a fact of national importance. Will you not sit down?”
“At your command, Sir!” and the Prince seated himself opposite his
father, who having studied his cigar sufficiently, replaced it between
his lips and went on smoking for a few minutes before he spoke again.
Then he resumed:--
“Your existence, I repeat, Humphry, is a fact of national importance.
To you falls the Throne when I have done with it, and life has done
with me. Therefore, your conduct,--your mode of life--your example in
manners--concern, not me, so much as the nation. You say that you cannot
trust me as a friend, because I have never loved you. Is not this a
somewhat childish remark on your part? We live in a very practical
age--love is not a necessary tie between human beings as things go
nowadays;--the closest bond of friendship rests on the basis of cash
accounts.”
“I am perfectly aware of that!” said the Prince, fixing his fine dark
eyes full on his father’s face--“And yet, after all, love is such a
vital necessity, that I have only to look at you, in order to realize
the failure and mistake of trying to do without it!”
The King gave him a glance of whimsical surprise.
“So!--you have begun to notice what I have known for years!” he said
lightly--“Clever young man! What fine fairy finger is pointing out to
you my deficiencies, while supplying your own? Do you learn to estimate
the priceless value of love while contemplating the romantic groves and
woodlands of The Islands? Do you read poetry there?--or write it? Or
talk it?”
Prince Humphry coloured,--then grew very pale.
“When I misuse my time, Sir,” he said--“Surely it will then be needful
to catechise me on the manner in which I spend it,--but not till then!”
“Fairly put!” answered the King--“But I have an idea--it may be a
mistaken idea,--still I have it--that you _are_ misusing your time,
Humphry! And this is the cause of our present little discussion. If I
knew that you occupied yourself with the pleasures befitting your age
and rank, I should be more at ease.”
“What do you consider to be the pleasures befitting my age and rank?”
asked the Prince with a touch of satire; “Making a fool of myself
generally?”
The King smiled.
“Well!--it would be better to make a fool of yourself generally than
particularly! Folly is not so harmful when spread like jam over a whole
slice of bread,--but it may cause a life-long sickness, if swallowed in
one secret gulp of sweetness!”
The Prince moved uneasily.
“You think I am catechising you,--and you resent it--but, my dear boy,
let me again remind you that you are in a manner answerable to the
nation for your actions; and especially to that particular section of
the nation called Society. Society is the least and worst part of the
whole community--but it has to be considered by such servants of the
public as ourselves. You know what James the First of England wrote
concerning the ‘domestic regulations’ on the conduct of a prince and
future king? ‘A king is set as one on a stage, whose smallest, actions
and gestures all the people gazinglie do behold; and, however just in
the discharge of his office, yet if his behaviour be light or dissolute,
in indifferent actions, the people, who see but the outward part,
conceive preoccupied conceits of the king’s inward intention, which
although with time, the trier of all truth, will evanish by the evidence
of the contrarie effect, yet, _interim patitur justus_, and prejudged
conceits will, in the meantime, breed contempt, the mother of rebellion
and disorder.’ Poor James of the ‘goggle eyes and large hysterical
heart’ as Carlyle describes him! Do you not agree with his estimate of a
royal position?”
“I am not aware, Sir, that my behaviour can as yet be called light or
dissolute;” replied the Prince coldly, with a touch of hauteur.
“I do not call it so, Humphry”--said the King--“To the best of my
knowledge, your conduct has always been most exemplary. But with all
your excessive decorum, you are mysterious. That is bad! Society will
not endure being kept in the dark, or outside the door of things, like
a bad child! It wants to be in the room, and know everything and
everybody. And this reminds me of another point on which the good
English James offers sound advice. ‘Remember to be plaine and sensible
in your language; for besides, it is the tongue’s office to be the
messenger of the mind, it may be thought a point of imbecilitie of
spirit, in a king to speak obscurely, much more untrewly, as if he stood
in awe of any in uttering his thoughts.’ That is precisely your mood at
the present moment, Humphry,--you stand ‘in awe’--of me or of someone
else,--in ‘uttering your thoughts.’”
“Pardon me, Sir,--I do not stand in awe of you or of anyone;” said the
Prince composedly--“I simply do not choose to ‘utter my thoughts’ just
now.”
The King looked at him in surprise, and with a touch of admiration. The
defiant air he had unconsciously assumed became him,--his handsome
face was pale, and his dark eyes coldly brilliant, like those of his
beautiful mother, with the steel light of an inflexible resolve.
“You do not choose?” said the King, after a pause--“You decline to give
any explanation of your long hours of absence?--your constant visits to
The Islands, and your neglect of those social duties which should keep
you at Court?”
“I decline to do so for the present,” replied the young man decisively;
“I can see no harm in my preference for quietness rather than
noise,--for scenes of nature rather than those of artificial folly. The
Islands are but two hours sail from this port,--little tufts of land set
in the sea, where the coral-fishers dwell. They are beautiful in
their natural adornment of foliage and flower;--I go there to read--to
dream--to think of life as a better, purer thing than what you call
‘society’ would make it for me; you cannot blame me for this?”
The King was silent.
“If it is your wish,”--went on the Prince--“that I should stay in the
palace more, I will obey you. If you desire me to be seen oftener in
the capital, I will endeavour to fulfil your command, though the streets
stifle me. But, for God’s sake, do not make me a puppet on show before
my time,--or marry me to a woman I hate, merely for the sake of heirs to
a wretched Throne!”
The King rose from his chair, and, walking towards the garden, threw the
rest of his cigar out among the foliage, where the burning morsel shone
like a stray glowworm in the green. Then he turned towards his son;--his
face was grave, almost stern.
“You can go, Humphry!” he said;--“I have no more to say to you at
present. You talk wildly and at random, as if you were, by some means or
other, voluntarily bent upon unfitting yourself for the position you
are destined to occupy. You will do well, I think, to remain more in
evidence at Court. You will also do well to be seen at some of the
different great social functions of the day. But I shall not coerce you.
Only--consider well what I have said!--and if you have a secret”--he
paused, and then repeated with emphasis--“I say, if you have a secret of
any kind, be advised, and confide in me before it is too late! Otherwise
you may find yourself betrayed unawares! Good-night!”
He walked away without throwing so much as a backward glance at the
Prince, who stood amazed at the suddenness and decision with which he
had brought the conversation to a close; and it was not till his tall
figure had disappeared that the young man began to realize the doubtful
awkwardness of the attitude he had assumed towards one who, both as
parent and king, had the most urgent claim in the world upon his respect
and obedience. Impatient and angry with himself, he crossed the loggia
and went out into the garden beyond. A young moon, slender as a bent
willow wand, gleamed in the clear heavens among hosts of stars more
brilliantly visible than itself, and the soft air, laden with the
perfume of thousands of flowers, cooled his brain and calmed his nerves.
The musical low murmur of the sea, lapping against the shore below the
palace walls, suggested a whole train of pleasing and poetical fancies,
and he strolled along the dewy grass paths, under tangles of scented
shrubs and arching boughs of pine, giving himself up to such idyllic
dreams of life and life’s fairest possibilities, as only youthful and
imaginative souls can indulge in. He was troubled and vexed by his
father’s warning, but not sufficiently to pay serious heed to it. His
‘secret’ was safe so far;--and all he had to do, so he considered, was
to exercise a little extra precaution.
“There is only Von Glauben,”--he thought, “and he would never betray me.
Besides it is a mere question of another year--and then I can make all
the truth known.”
The lovely long-drawn warble of a nightingale broke the stillness
around him with a divine persistence of passion. He listened, standing
motionless, his eyes lifted towards the dark boughs above him, from
whence the golden notes dropped liquidly; and his heart beat quickly as
he thought of a voice sweeter than that of any heavenly-gifted bird, a
face fairer than that of the fabled goddess who on such a night as this
descended from her silver moon-car to enchant Endymion;--and he murmured
half aloud--
“Who would not risk a kingdom--ay! a thousand kingdoms!--for such
happiness as I possess! It is a foolish, blind world nowadays, that
forgets the glory of its youth,--the glow, the breath, the tenderness of
love!--all for amassing gold and power! I will not be of such a world,
nor with it;--I will not be like my father, the slave of pomp and
circumstance;--I will live an unfettered life--yes!--even if I have to
resign the throne for the sake of freedom, still I will be free!”
He strolled on, absorbed in romantic reverie, and the nightingale’s
song followed him through the winding woods down to the shore, where the
waves made other music of their own, which harmonised with the dreamy
fancies of his mind.
Meanwhile, the King had sought his consort in her own apartments.
Walking down the great corridor which led to these, the most beautiful
rooms in the palace, he became aware of the silvery sound of stringed
instruments mingling with harmonious voices,--though he scarcely heeded
the soft rush of melody which came thus wafted to his ears. He was full
of thoughts and schemes,--his son’s refusal to confide in him had not
seriously troubled him, because he knew he should, with patience, find
out in good time all that the young Prince had declined to explain,--and
his immediate interest was centred in his own immediate plans.
On reaching the ante-room leading to the Queen’s presence-chamber, he
was informed that her Majesty was listening to a concert in the rosery.
Thither he went unattended,--and passing through a long suite of
splendid rooms, each one more sumptuously adorned than the last, he
presently stepped out on the velvet greensward of one of the most
perfect rose gardens in the world--a garden walled entirely round with
tall hedges of the clambering flowers which gave it its name, and which
were trailed up on all sides, so as to form a ceiling or hanging
canopy above. In the centre of this floral hall, now in full blossom,
a fountain tossed up one tall column of silver spray; and at its upper
end, against a background of the dainty white roses called “Felicité
perpétuelle” sat the Queen, in a high chair of carved ivory, surrounded
by her ladies. Delicious music, performed by players and singers who
were hidden behind the trees, floated in voluptuous strains upon the
air, and the King, looking at the exquisite grouping of fair women and
flowers, lit by the coloured lamps which gleamed here and there among
the thick foliage, wondered to himself how it chanced, that amid
surroundings which were calculated to move the senses to the most
refined and delicate rapture, he himself could feel no quickening pulse,
no touch of admiration. These open-air renderings of music and song were
the Queen’s favourite form of recreation;--at such times alone would her
proud face soften and her eyes grow languid with an unrevealed weight of
dreams. But should her husband, or any one of his sex break in upon the
charmed circle, her pleasure was at once clouded,--and the cold hauteur
of her beautiful features became again inflexibly frozen. Such was the
case now, when perceiving the King, she waved her hand as a sign for the
music to cease; and with a glance of something like wonderment at his
intrusion, saluted him profoundly as he entered the precincts of her
garden Court. But for once he did not pause as usual, on his way to
where she sat,--but lightly acknowledging the deep curtseys of the
ladies in attendance, he advanced towards her and raising her hand in
courtly homage to his lips, seated himself carelessly in a low chair at
her feet.
“Let the music go on!” he said; “I am here to listen.”
The Queen looked at him,--he met her eyes with an expression that she
had never seen on his face before.
“Suffer me to have my way!” he said to her in a low tone--“Let your
singers finish their programme; afterwards do me the favour to dismiss
your women, for I must speak with you alone.”
She bent her head in acquiescence; and re-seated herself on her ivory
throne. The sign was given for the continuance of the music, and the
King, leaning back in his chair, half closed his eyes as he listened
dreamily to the harmonious throbbing of harps and violins around him,
in the stillness of the languid southern night. His hand almost brushed
against his wife’s jewelled robes--the scent of the great lilies on her
breast was wafted to him with every breath of air, and he thought--“All
this would be Paradise,--with any other woman!” And while he so thought,
the clear tenor voice of one of the unseen singers rang out in half gay,
half tender tones:
If I loved you, and you loved me,
How happy this little world would be--
The light of the day, the dancing hours,
The skies, the trees, the birds and flowers,
Would all be part of our perfect gladness;--
And never a note of pain or sadness
Would jar life’s beautiful melody
If I loved you, and you loved me!
‘If I loved you!’ Why, I scarcely know
How if I did, the time would go!--
I should forget my dreary cares,
My sordid toil, my long despairs,
I should watch your smile, and kneel at your feet,
And live my life in the love of you, Sweet!--
So mad, so glad, so proud I should be,
If I loved you, and you loved me!
‘If you loved me!’ Ah, nothing so strange
As that could chance in this world of change!--
As well expect a planet to fall,
Or a Queen to dwell in a beggar’s hall--
But if you did,--romance and glory
Might spring from our lives’ united story,
And angels might be less happy than we--
If I loved you and you loved me!
‘If I loved you and you loved me!’
Alas, ‘t is a joy we shall never see!
You are too fair--I am too cold;--
We shall drift along till we both grow old,
Till we reach the grave, and gasping, die,
Looking back on the days that have passed us by,
When ‘what might have been,’ can no longer be,--
When I lost you, and you lost me!
The song concluded abruptly, and with passion;--and the King, turning on
his elbow, glanced with a touch of curiosity at the face of his Queen.
There was not a flicker of emotion on its fair cold calmness,--not a
quiver on the beautiful lips, or a sigh to stir the quiet breast on
which the lilies rested, white and waxen, and heavily odorous. He
withdrew his gaze with a half smile at his own folly for imagining that
she could be moved by a mere song to any expression of feeling,--even
for a moment,--and allowed his glance to wander unreservedly over the
forms and features of the other ladies in attendance who, conscious of
his regard, dropped their eyelids and blushed softly, after the fashion
approved by the heroines of the melodramatic stage. Whereat he began to
think of the tiresome sameness of women generally; and their irritating
habit of living always at two extremes,--either all ardour, or all
coldness.
“Both are equally fatiguing to a man’s mind,” he thought
impatiently--“The only woman that is truly fascinating is the one who
is never in the same mind two days together. Fair on Monday, plain on
Tuesday, sweet on Wednesday, sour on Thursday, tender on Friday, cold on
Saturday, and in all moods at once on Sunday,--that being a day of rest!
I should adore such a woman as that if I ever met her, because I should
never know her mind towards me!”
A soft serenade rendered by violins, with a harp accompaniment, was
followed by a gay mazurka, played by all the instruments together,--and
this finished the musical programme.
The Queen rose, accepting the hand which the King extended to her,
and moved with him slowly across the rose-garden, her long snowy train
glistering with jewels, and held up from the greensward by a pretty
page, who, in his picturesque costume of rose and gold, demurely
followed his Royal lady’s footsteps,--and so amid the curtseying
ladies-in-waiting and other attendants, they passed together into a
private boudoir, at the threshold of which the Queen’s train-bearer
dropped his rich burden of perfumed velvet and gems, and bowing low,
left their Majesties together.
Shutting the door upon him with his own hand, the King drew a heavy
portière across it,--and then walking round the room saw that every
window was closed,--every nook secure. The Queen’s boudoir was one of
the most sacred corners in the whole palace,--no one, not even the most
intimate lady of the Court in personal attendance on her Majesty, dared
enter it without special permission; and this being the case, the
Queen herself was faintly moved to surprise at the extra precaution
her husband appeared to be taking to ensure privacy. She stood silently
watching his movements till he came up to her, and bowing courteously,
said:--
“I pray you, be seated, Madam! I will not detain you long.”
She obeyed his gesture, and sank down in a chair with that inimitable
noiseless grace which made every attitude of hers a study for an artist,
and waited for his next words; while he, standing opposite to her, bent
his eyes upon her face with a certain wistfulness and appeal.
“I have never asked you a favour,” he began--“and--since the day we
married,--I have never sought your sympathy. The years have come and
gone, leaving no visible trace on either you or me, so far as outward
looks go,--and if they have scarred and wrinkled us inwardly, only God
can see those scars! But as time moves on with a man,--I know not how it
is with a woman,--if he be not altogether a fool, he begins to consider
the way in which he has spent, or is spending his life,--whether he has
been, or is yet likely to be of any use to the world he lives in,--or
if he is of less account than the blown froth of the sea, or the sand
on the shore. Myriads and myriads of men and women are no more than
this--no more than midges or ants or worms;--but every now and then in
the course of centuries, one man does stand forth from the million,--one
heart does beat courageously enough to send the firm echo of its
pulsations through a long vista of time,--one soul does so exalt and
inspire the rest of the world by its great example that we are, through
its force reminded of something divine,--something high and true in a
low wilderness of shams!”
He paused; the Queen raised her beautiful eyes, and smiled strangely.
“Have you only just now thought of this?” she said.
He flushed, and bit his lip.
“To be perfectly honest with you, Madam, I have thought of nothing worth
thinking about for many years! Most men in my position would probably
make the same confession. Perhaps had you given me any great work to do
for your sake I should have done it! Had _you_ inspired me to achieve
some great conquest, either for myself or others, I should no doubt
have conquered! But I have lived for twenty-one years in your admirable
company without being commanded by you to do anything worthy of a
king;--I am now about to command Myself!--in order to leave some notable
trace of my name in history.”
While he thus spoke, a faint flush coloured the Queen’s cheeks, but it
quickly died away, leaving her very pale. Her fingers strayed among the
great jewels she wore, and toyed unconsciously with a ruby talisman cut
in the shape of a heart, and encircled with diamonds. The King noted the
flash of the gems against the whiteness of her hand, and said:
“Your heart, Madam, is like the jewel you hold!--clear crimson, and full
of fire,--but it is not the fire of Heaven, though you may perchance
judge it to be so. Rather is it of hell!--(I pray you to pardon me for
the roughness of this suggestion!)--for one of the chief crimes of
the devil is unconquerable hatred of the human race. You share
Satan’s aversion to man!--and strange indeed it is that even the most
sympathetic companionship with your own sex cannot soften that aversion!
However, we will not go into this;--the years have proved you true to
your own temperament, and there is nothing to be said on the matter,
either of blame or of praise. As I said, I have never asked a favour of
you, nor have I sought the sympathy which it is not in your nature
to give. I have not even claimed your obedience in any particular
strictness of form; but that is my errand to you to-night,--indeed it is
the sole object of this private interview,--to claim your entire, your
unfaltering, your implicit obedience!”
She raised her head haughtily.
“To what commands, Sir?” she asked.
“To those I have here written,--” and he handed her a paper folded
in two, which she took wonderingly, as he extended it. “Read this
carefully!--and if you have any objections to urge, I am willing to
listen to you with patience, though scarcely to alter the conditions
laid down.”
He turned away, and walked slowly through the room, pausing a moment
to whistle to a tiny bird swinging in a gilded cage, that perked up its
pretty head at his call and twittered with pleasure.
“So you respond to kindness, little one!” he said softly,--“You are more
Christ-like in that one grace than many a Christian!”
He started, as a light touch fell on his shoulder, and he saw the Queen
standing beside him. She held the paper he had given her in one hand,
and as he looked at her enquiringly she touched it with her lips, and
placed it in her bosom.
“I swear my obedience to your instructions, Sir!” she said,--“Do not
fear to trust me!”
Gently he took her hands and kissed them.
“I thank you!” he said simply.
For a moment they confronted each other. The beautiful cold woman’s eyes
drooped under the somewhat sad and searching gaze of the man.
“But--your life!--” she murmured.
“My life!” He laughed and dropped her hands. “Would you care, Madam, if
I were dead? Would you shed any tears? Not you! Why should you? At this
late hour of time, when after twenty-one years passed in each other’s
close company we are no nearer to each other in heart and soul than if
the sea murmuring yonder at the foot of these walls were stretching
its whole width between us! Besides--we are both past our youth! And,
according to certain highly instructed scientists and philosophers, the
senses and affections grow numb with age. I do not believe this theory
myself--for the jejune love of youth is as a taper’s flame to the great
and passionate tenderness of maturity, when the soul, and not the body,
claims its due; when love is not dragged down to the vulgar level of
mere cohabitation, after the fashion of the animals in a farmyard,
but rises to the best height of human sympathy and intelligent
comprehension. Who knows!--I may experience such a love as that
yet,--and so may you!”
She was silent.
“Talking of love,”--he went on--“May I ask whether our son,--or rather
the nation’s son, Humphry,--ever makes you his confidante?”
“Never!” she replied.
“I thought not! We do not seem to be the kind of parents admired
in moral story-books, Madam! We are not the revered darlings of our
children. In fact, our children have the happy disposition of animal
cubs,--once out of the nursing stage, they forget they ever had parents.
It is quite the natural and proper thing, born as they were born,--it
would never do for them to have any over-filial regard for us. Imagine
Humphry weeping for my death, or yours! What a grotesque idea! And as
for Rupert and Cyprian,--it is devoutly to be hoped that when we die,
our funerals may be well over before the great cricket matches of the
year come on, as otherwise they will curse us for having left the world
at an inconvenient season!” He laughed. “How sentiment has gone out
nowadays, or how it seems to have gone out! Yet it slumbers in the
heart of the nation,--and if it should ever awaken,--well!--it will be
dangerous! I asked you about Humphry, because I imagine he is entangled
in some love-affair. If it should be agreeable to your humour to go with
me across to The Islands one day this week, we may perhaps by chance
discover the reason of his passion for that particular kind of scenery!”
The Queen’s eyes opened wonderingly.
“The Islands!” she repeated,--“The Islands? Why, only the coral-fishers
live there,--they have a community of their own, and are jealous of all
strangers. What should Humphry do there?”
“That is more than I can tell you,” answered the King,--“And it is more
than he will himself explain. Nevertheless, he is there nearly every
day,--some attraction draws him, but what, I cannot discover. If Humphry
were of the soul of me, as he is of the body of me, I should not even
try to fathom his secret,--but he is the nation’s child--heir to its
throne--and as such, it is necessary that we, for the nation’s sake,
should guard him in the nation’s interests. If you chance to learn
anything of the object of his constant sea-wanderings, I trust you will
find it coincident with your pleasure to inform me?”
“I shall most certainly obey you in this, Sir, as in all other things!”
she replied.
He moved a step or two towards her.
“Good-night!” he said very gently, and detaching one of the lilies from
her corsage, took it in his own hand. “Good-night! This flower will
remind me of you;--white and beautiful, with all the central gold deep
hidden!”
He looked at her intently, with a lingering look, half of tenderness,
half of regret, and bowing in the courtliest fashion of homage, left her
presence.
She remained alone, the velvet folds of her train flowing about her
feet, and the jewels on her breast flashing like faint sparks of flame
in the subdued glow of the shaded lamplight. She was touched for the
first time in her life by the consciousness of something infinitely
noble, and altogether above her in her husband’s nature. Slowly she
drew out the paper he had given her from her bosom and read it through
again--and yet once again. Almost unconsciously to herself a mist
gathered in her eyes and softened into two bright tears, which dropped
down her fair cheeks, and lost themselves among her diamonds.
“He is brave!” she murmured--“Braver than I thought he could ever be--”
She roused herself sharply from her abstraction. Emotions which were
beyond her own control had strangely affected her, and the humiliating
idea that her moods had for a moment escaped beyond her guidance made
her angry with herself for what she considered mere weakness. And
passing quickly out of the boudoir, in the vague fear that solitude
might deepen the sense of impotence and failure which insinuated itself
slowly upon her, like a dull blight creeping through her heart and soul,
she rejoined her ladies, the same great Queen as ever, with the same
look of indifference on her face, the same chill smile, the same
perfection of loveliness, unwithered by any visible trace of sorrow or
of passion.