to hear of his sins, that he might repent and be saved; is said to be a
man that saith unto God, Depart from me, for I desire not the knowledge
of thy wayes. {163a} He is a man that sayes in his heart and with his
actions, I have loved strangers, (sins) and after them I will goe. He
is a man that shuts his eyes, stops his ears, and that turneth his
spirit against God. Yea he is the man that is at enmity with God, and
that abhorres him with his soul. {163b}
Atten. What other signe can you give me that Mr. Badman died without
repentance?
Wise. Why, he did never heartily cry to God for mercy all the time of
his affliction. {163c} True, when sinking fits, stitches, or pains took
hold upon him, then he would say as other carnal men use to do, Lord
help me, Lord strengthen me, Lord deliver me, and the like: But to cry
to God for mercy, that he did not, but lay, as I hinted before, as if
he never had sinned.
Atten. That is another bad sign indeed; for crying to God for mercy,
is one of the first signs of repentance. When Paul lay repenting of
his sin, upon his bed, the Holy Ghost said of him, Behold he prayes.
{163d} But he that hath not the first signs of repentance, ’tis a sign
he hath none of the other, and so indeed none at all. I do not say, but
there may be crying, where there may be no sign of repentance. They
cryed, says David, to the Lord, but he answered them not; {163e} but
that he would have done, if their cry had been the fruit of repentance.
But, I say, if men may cry, and yet have no repentance, be sure, they
have none, that cry not at all. It is said in Job, They cry not when
he bindeth them; {163f} that is, because they have no repentance; no
repentance, no cryes; false repentance, false cryes; true repentance,
true cryes.
Wise. I know that it is as possible for a man to forbear crying that
hath repentance, as it is for a man to forbear groaning that feeleth
deadly pain. He that looketh into the Book of Psalms, (where repentance
is most lively set forth even in its true and proper effects,) shall
there find, that crying, strong crying, hearty crying, great crying,
and uncessant crying, hath been the fruits of repentance: (But none of
this had this Mr. Badman, therefore he dyed in his sins.)
That Crying is an inseparable effect of repentance, is seen in these
Scriptures. Have mercy upon me, O God, according to the multitude of
thy tender mercies, blot out my transgressions. O Lord, rebuke me
not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure. Have
mercy upon me, O Lord, for I am weak. O Lord, heal me for my bones are
vexed. My soul is also vexed, but thou, O Lord, how long: Return, O
Lord, deliver my soul: O save me for thy mercies sake: O Lord, rebuke
me not in thy wrath, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure; for
thine arrows stick fast in me, and thy hand presseth me sore. There
is no soundness in my flesh, because of thine anger, neither is there
any rest in my bones, because of my sin. For mine iniquities are gone
over mine head, as an heavy burthen, they are too heavy for me. My
wounds stink and are corrupt; because of my foolishness. I am troubled,
I am bowed down greatly, I goe mourning all the day long. My loyns
are filled with a loathsom disease, and there is no soundness in my
flesh. I am feeble, and sore broken, I have roared by reason of the
disquietness of my heart. {164a}
I might give you a great number more of the holy sayings of good men,
whereby they express how they were, what they felt, and whether they
cryed or no, when repentance was wrought in them. Alas, alas, it is as
possible for a man, when the pangs of Guilt are upon him to forbear
praying, as it is for a woman when pangs of travel are upon her to
forbear crying. If all the world should tell me that such a man hath
repentance, yet if he is not a praying man, I should not be perswaded
to believe it.
Atten. I know no reason why you should: for there is nothing can
demonstrate that such a man hath it. But pray Sir, what other sign have
you, by which you can prove that Mr. Badman died in his sins, and so in
a state of damnation?
Wise. I have this to prove it. {164b} Those who were his old sinfull
companions in the time of his health, were those whose company and
carnal talk he most delighted in, in the time of his sickness. I did
occasionally hint this before, but now I make it an argument of his
want of grace: for where there is indeed a work of Grace in the heart,
that work doth not only change the heart, thoughts and desires, but the
conversation also; yea conversation and company too. When Paul had a
work of grace in his soul, he assayed to Joyn himself to the Disciples.
He was for his old companions in their abominations no longer: he was
now a Disciple, and was for the company of Disciples. And he was with
them coming in and going out in Jerusalem. {165a}
Atten. I thought something when I heard you make mention of it before.
Thought I, this is a shrewd sign that he had not grace in his heart.
Birds of a feather, thought I, will flock together: If this man was
one of Gods children, he would heard with Gods children, his delight
would be with, and in the company of Gods children. As David said, I
am a companion of all them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy
precepts. {165b}
Wise. You say well, for what fellowship hath he that believeth with
an Infidel? And although it be true, that all that joyn to the godly
are not godly, yet they that shall inwardly choose the company of the
ungodly and open profane, rather than the company of the godly, as
Mr. Badman did; surely are not godly men, but profane. He was, as I
told you, out of his element, when good men did come to visit him, but
then he was where he would be, when he had his vain companions about
him. Alas! grace, as I said, altereth all, heart, life, company, and
all; for by it the heart and man is made new: and a new heart, a new
man, must have objects of delight that are new, and like himself: Old
things are passed away; Why? For all things are become new. {165c} Now
if all things are become new, to wit, heart, mind, thoughts, desires,
and delights, it followeth by consequence that the company must be
answerable: hence it is said, That they that believed were together;
that they went to their own company; that they were added to the
Church; that they were of one heart and of one soul; {165d} and the
like. Now if it be objected that Mr. Badman was sick, and so could
not goe to the godly, yet he had a tongue in his head, and could, had
he had an heart, have spoken to some to call or send for the godly to
come to him. Yea, he would have done so; yea the company of all others,
specially his fellow sinners, would, even in every appearance of them
before him, have been a burden and a grief unto him. His heart and
affection standing bent to good, good companions would have suited him
best. But his Companions were his old Associates, his delight was in
them, therefore his heart and soul were yet ungodly.
Atten. Pray how was he when he drew near his end? for I perceive that
what you say of him now, hath reference to him, and to his actions,
at the beginning of his sickness? Then he could endure company, and
much talk; besides, perhaps then he thought he should recover and not
die, as afterwards he had cause to think, when he was quite wasted
with pining sickness, when he was at the graves mouth. But how was he,
I say, when he was (as we say) at the graves mouth, within a step of
death? when he saw, and knew, and could not but know, that shortly he
must dye, and appear before the Judgment of God?
Wise. Why {166a} there was not any other alteration in him, than what
was made by his disease upon his body: sickness, you know, will alter
the body, also pains and stitches will make men groan; but for his
mind he had no alteration there. His mind was the same, his heart was
the same. He was the self-same Mr. Badman still: not onely in Name but
Conditions, and that to the very day of his death: yea, so far as could
be gathered to the very moment in which he died.
Atten. Pray how was he in his death? was Death strong upon him? or did
he dye with ease, quietly?
Wise. As quietly as a {166b} Lamb. There seemed not to be in it, to
standers by, so much as a strong struggle of Nature: and as for his
Mind, it seemed to be wholly at quiet. But pray why do you ask me this
question?
Atten. Not for mine own sake, but for others. For there is such {166c}
an opinion as this among the ignorant: That if a man dies, as they call
it, like a Lamb, that is, quietly, and without that consternation of
mind that others shew in their death, they conclude, and that beyond
all doubt, that such an one is gone to Heaven, and is certainly escaped
the wrath to come.
Wise. There is no Judgment to be made by a quiet death, of the Eternal
state of him that so dieth. Suppose one man should die quietly, another
should die suddenly, and a third should die under great consternation
of spirit; no man can Judge of their eternall condition by the manner
of any of these kinds of deaths. He that dies quietly, suddenly, or
under consternation of spirit, may goe to Heaven, or may goe to Hell;
no man can tell whether a man goes, by any such manner of death. The
{167a} Judgment therefore that we make of the eternall condition of a
man must be gathered from another consideration: To wit, Did the man
die in his sins? did he die in unbelief? did he die before he was born
again? then he is gone to the Devil and hell, though he died never so
quietly. Again, Was the man a good man? had he faith and holiness?
was he a lover and a Worshipper of God by Christ, according to his
Word? Then he is gone to God and Heaven, how suddenly, or in what
consternation of mind soever he died: But Mr. Badman was naught, his
life was evil, his wayes were evil; evil to his end: he therefore went
to Hell and to the Devil, how quietly soever he died.
Indeed there is, in some cases, a Judgment to be made of a mans eternal
condition by the manner of the death he dieth. {167b} As suppose now
a man should murder himself, or live a wicked life, and after that
die in utter despair; these men without doubt do both of them goe to
Hell. And here I will take an occasion to speak of two of Mr. Badmans
Brethren, (for you know I told you before that he had Brethren,) and of
the manner of their death. One of them killed himself, and the other
after a wicked life died in utter despair. Now I should not be afraid
to conclude of both these, that they went by, and through their death
to hell.
Atten. Pray tell me concerning the first, how he made away himself?
Wise. Why, he took a knife and cut his own Throat, and immediately gave
up the Ghost and died. Now what can we judge of such a mans condition;
since the Scripture saith, No murderer hath eternall life, &c. but
that it must be concluded, that such an one is gone to Hell. He was a
murderer, a Self-murderer; and he is the worst murderer, one that slays
his own body and soul: nor doe we find mention made of any but cursed
ones that doe such kind of deeds. I say, no mention made in holy Writ
of any others, but such, that murder themselves.
And this is the sore Judgment of God upon men, when God shall, for the
sins of such, give them up to be their own Executioners, or rather to
execute his Judgment and Anger upon themselves. And let me earnestly
give this Caution to sinners. Take heed, Sirs, break off your sins,
lest God serves you as he served Mr. Badmans Brother: That is, lest he
gives you up to be your own Murderers.
Atten. Now you talk of this. [Picture: Take note symbol] I did once
know a man, a Barber, that took his own Raisor, and cut his own Throat,
and then put his head out of his Chamber-window, to shew the neighbours
what he had done, and after a little while died.
Wise. [Picture: Take note symbol] I can tell you a more dreadful thing
than this: I mean as to the manner of doing the fact. {168c} There was
about twelve years since, a man that lived at Brafield by Northampton,
(named John Cox) that murdered himself; the manner of his doing of it
was thus. He was a poor man, and had for some time been sick (and the
time of his sickness was about the beginning of Hay-time;) and taking
too many thoughts how he should live afterwards, if he lost his present
season of work, he fell into deep despair about the world, and cryed
out to his wife the morning before he killed himself, saying, We are
undone. But quickly after, he desired his wife to depart the room,
Because, said he, I will see if I can get any rest; so she went out:
but he instead of sleeping, quickly took his Raisor, and therewith cut
up a great hole in his side, out of which he pulled, and cut off some
of his guts, and threw them, with the blood up and down the Chamber.
But this not speeding of him so soon as he desired, he took the same
Raisor and therewith cut his own throat. His wife then hearing of him
sigh and fetch his wind short, came again into the room to him, and
seeing what he had done, she ran out and called in some Neighbours,
who came to him where he lay in a bloody manner, frightfull to behold.
Then said one of them to him, Ah! John, what have you done? are you
not sorry for what you have done? He answered roughly, ’Tis too late
to be sorry. Then said the same person to him again, Ah! John, pray to
God to forgive thee this bloody act of thine. At the hearing of which
Exhortation, he seemed much offended, and in angry manner said, Pray!
and with that flung himself away to the wall, and so after a few gasps
died desperately. When he had turned him of his back, to the wall, the
blood ran out of his belly as out of a boul, and soaked quite through
the bed to the boards, and through the chinks of the boards it ran
pouring down to the ground. Some said, that when the neighbours came to
see him, he lay groaping with his hand in his bowels, reaching upward,
as was thought, that he might have pulled or cut out his heart. ’Twas
said also, that some of his Liver had been by him torn out and cast
upon the boards, and that many of his guts hung out of the bed on the
side thereof. But I cannot confirm all particulars; but the general of
the story, with these circumstances above mentioned, is true; I had it
from a sober and credible person, who himself was one that saw him in
this bloody state, and that talked with him, as was hinted before.
Many other such dreadful things might be told you, but these are
enough, and too many too, if God in his wisdom had thought necessary to
prevent them.
Atten. This is a dreadful Story: and I would to God that it might
be a warning to others to instruct them to fear before God, and
pray, lest he gives them up to doe as John Cox hath done. For surely
self-murderers cannot goe to Heaven: and therefore, as you have said,
he that dieth by his own hands, is certainly gone to Hell. But speak a
word or two of the other man you mentioned.
Wise. What? of a wicked man dying in Despair?
Atten. Yes, of a wicked man dying in despair.
Wise. Well then: {169a} This Mr. Badmans other Brother was a very
wicked man, both in Heart and Life; I say in Heart, because he was so
in Life, nor could anything reclaim him; neither good Men, good Books,
good Examples, nor Gods Judgements. Well, after he had lived a great
while in his sins, God smote with a sickness of which he died. Now in
his sickness his Conscience began to be awakened, and he began to roar
out of his ill-spent Life, insomuch that the Town began to ring of him.
Now when it was noysed about, many of the Neighbours came to see him,
and to read by him, as is the common way with some; but all that they
could doe, [Picture: Take note symbol] could not abate his terror, but
he would lie in his Bed gnashing of his teeth, and wringing of his
wrists, concluding upon the Damnation of his Soul, and in that horror
and despair he dyed; not calling upon God, but distrusting in his
Mercy, and Blaspheming of his Name.
Atten. This brings to my mind a man that a Friend of mine told me of.
[Picture: Take note symbol] He had been a wicked liver; so when he
came to die, he fell into despair, and having concluded that God had
no mercy for him he addressed himself to the Devil for favour, saying,
Good Devil be good unto me.
Wise. This is almost like Saul, who being forsaken of God, went to the
Witch of Endor, and so to the Devil for help. {170a} But alas, should
I set my self to collect these dreadful Stories, it would be easie in
little time to present you with hundreds of them: But I will conclude
as I began; They that are their own Murderers, or that die in Despair,
after they have lived a life of wickedness, do surely go to Hell.
And here I would put in a Caution: Every one that dieth under
consternation of spirit; that is, under amazement and great fear, do
not therefore die in Despair: For a good man may have this for his
bands in his death, and yet go to Heaven and Glory. For, as I said
before, He that is a good man, a man that hath Faith and Holiness, a
lover and Worshipper of God by Christ, according to his Word, may die
in consternation of spirit: for Satan will not be wanting to assault
good men upon their death-bed, but they are secured by the Word and
Power of God; yea, and are also helped, though with much agony of
spirit, to exercise themselves in Faith and Prayer, the which he that
dieth in Despair, can by no means doe. But let us return to Mr. Badman,
and enter further Discourse of the manner of his Death.
Atten. I think you and I are both of a mind; for just now I was
thinking to call you back to him also. And pray now, since it is your
own motion to return again to him, let us discourse a little more of
his quiet and still death.
Wise. With all my heart. You know we were speaking before of the manner
of Mr. Badmans death: {171a} How that he dyed very stilly and quietly;
upon which you made observation, that the common people conclude,
that if a man dyes quietly, and as they call it, like a Lamb, he is
certainly gone to Heaven: when alas, if a wicked man dyes quietly, if a
man that has all his dayes lived in notorious sin, dyeth quietly; his
quiet dying is so far off from being a sign of his being saved, that it
is an uncontrollable proof of his damnation. This was Mr. Badmans case,
he lived wickedly even to the last, and then went quietly out of the
world: therefore Mr. Badman is gone to Hell.
Att. Well, but since you are upon it, and also so confident in it, to
wit, that a man that lives a wicked life till he dyes, and then dyes
quietly, is gone to Hell; let me see what shew of proof you have for
this your opinion.
Wise. My first argument is drawn from the Necessity of repentance: No
man can be saved except he repents, nor can he repent that sees not,
that knows not that he is a sinner, and he that knows himself to be
a sinner, will, I will warrant him, be molested for the time by that
knowledge. {171b} This, as it is testified by all the Scriptures, so
it is testified by Christian experience. He that knows of himself to
be a sinner, is molested, especially if that knowledge comes not to
him untill he is cast upon his death-bed; molested, I say, before he
can dye quietly. Yea, he is molested, dejected and cast down, he is
also made to cry out, to hunger and thirst after mercy by Christ,
and if at all he shall indeed come to die quietly, I mean with that
quietness that is begotten by Faith and Hope in Gods mercy (to the
which Mr. Badman and his brethren were utter strangers,) his quietness
is distinguished by all Judicious observers, by what went before it, by
what it flows from, and also by what is the fruit thereof.
I must confess I am no admirer of sick-bed repentance, for I think
verily it is seldom {171c} good for any thing: but I say, he that hath
lived in sin and profaneness all his dayes, as Mr. Badman did, and yet
shall dye quietly, that is, without repentance steps in ’twixt his life
and death, he is assuredly gone to Hell, and is damned.
Atten. This does look like an argument indeed; for Repentance must
come, or else we must goe to Hell-fire: and if a lewd liver shall (I
mean that so continues till the day of his death), yet goe out of the
world quietly, ’tis a sign that he died without repentance, and so a
sign that he is damned.
Wise. I am satisfied in it, for my part, and that from the Necessity,
and Nature of repentance. It is necessary, because God calls for it,
and will not pardon sin without it: Except ye repent ye shall all
likewise perish. This is that which God hath said, and he will prove
but a fool-hardy man that shall yet think to goe to Heaven and glory
without it. Repent, for the Ax is laid to the root of the tree, every
tree therefore that bringeth not forth good fruit, (but no good fruit
can be where there is not sound repentance) shall be hewn down, and
cast into the fire. {172a} This was Mr. Badmans case, he had attending
of him a sinfull life, and that to the very last, and yet dyed quietly,
that is, without repentance; he is gone to Hell and is damned. For the
Nature of repentance, I have touched upon that already, and shewed,
that it never was where a quiet death is the immediate companion of a
sinfull life; and therefore Mr. Badman is gone to Hell.
Secondly, {172b} My second argument is drawn from that blessed Word of
Christ, While the strong man armed keeps the house, his goods are in
peace, till a stronger than he comes: but the strong man armed kept Mr.
Badmans house, that is, his heart, and soul, and body, for he went from
a sinfull life quietly, out of this world: the stronger did not disturb
by intercepting with sound repentance, betwixt his sinful life and his
quiet death: Therefore Mr. Badman is gone to Hell.
The strong man armed is the Devil, and quietness is his security. The
Devil never fears losing of the sinner, if he can but keep him quiet:
can he but keep him quiet in a sinfull life, and quiet in his death, he
is his own. Therefore he saith, his goods are in peace; that is, out
of danger. There is no fear of the Devils losing such a soul, I say,
because Christ, who is the best Judge in this matter, saith, his goods
are in peace, in quiet, and out of danger.
Atten. This is a good one too; {173a} for doubtless, peace and quiet
with sin, is one of the greatest signs of a damnable state.
Wise. So it is. Therefore, when God would shew the greatness of his
anger against sin and sinners in one word, he saith, They are joyned
to Idols, let them alone. {173b} Let them alone, that is, disturb
them not; let them goe on without controll; let the Devil enjoy them
peaceably, let him carry them out of the world unconverted quietly.
This is one of the sorest of Judgments, and bespeaketh the burning
anger of God against sinfull men. See also when you come home, the
fourteenth Verse of the Chapter last mentioned in the Margent: I will
not punish your daughters when they commit Whoredom. I will let them
alone, they shall live and dye in their sins. But,
Thirdly, My third argument {173c} is drawn from that saying of Christ:
He hath blinded their eyes, and hardened their hearts; that they should
not see with their eyes, nor understand with their hearts, and be
converted, and I should heal them. {173d}
There are three things that I will take notice of from these words.
1. The first is, That there can be no conversion to God where the eye
is darkned, and the heart hardened. The eye must first be made to see,
and the heart to break and relent under and for sin, or else there
can be no conversion. He hath blinded their eyes, and hardned their
hearts, lest they should see, and understand and (So) be converted. And
this was clearly Mr. Badmans case, he lived a wicked life, and also
died with his eyes shut, and heart hardened, as is manifest, in that a
sinful life was joyned with a quiet death; and all for that he should
not be converted, but partake of the fruit of his sinfull life in Hell
fire.
2. The second thing that I take notice of from these words is, That
this is a dispensation and manifestation of Gods anger against a man
for his sin. When God is angry with men, I mean, when he is so angry
with them, this among many is one of the Judgments that he giveth them
up unto, to wit, to blindness of mind, and hardness of heart, which
he also suffereth to accompany them till they enter in at the gates
of death. And then, and there, and not short of then and there, their
eyes come to be opened. Hence it is said of the rich man mentioned in
Luke, He dyed, and in Hell he lifted up his eyes: {174a} Implying that
he did not lift them up before: He neither saw what he had done, nor
whither he was going, till he came to the place of execution, even into
Hell. He died asleep in his soul; he dyed bespotted, stupified, and so
consequently for quietness, like a Child or Lamb, even as Mr. Badman
did: this was a sign of Gods anger; he had a mind to damn him for his
sins, and therefore would not let him see nor have an heart to repent
for them, lest he should convert, and his damnation, which God had
appointed, should be frustrate: lest they should be converted, and I
should heal them.