[Illustration]
UNCLE WIGGILY'S
(TRADE MARK REGISTERED)
AUTOMOBILE
_by_
HOWARD R. GARIS
_Author of_ "UNCLE WIGGILY BEDTIME STORIES",
"UNCLE WIGGILY'S PICTURE BOOK",
"UNCLE WIGGILY'S STORY BOOK", Etc.
_Illustrated by_
LOUIS WISA
[Illustration]
A. L. BURT COMPANY
PUBLISHERS NEW YORK
UNCLE WIGGILY BOOKS
(TRADE MARK REGISTERED)
_by_
HOWARD R. GARIS
* * * * *
BEDTIME STORIES
UNCLE WIGGILY and CHARLIE and ARABELLA CHICK
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE RINGTAILS
UNCLE WIGGILY ON SUGAR ISLAND
UNCLE WIGGILY AT THE SEASHORE
UNCLE WIGGILY AND BABY BUNTY
UNCLE WIGGILY IN THE COUNTRY
UNCLE WIGGILY'S PUZZLE BOOK
UNCLE WIGGILY IN THE WOODS
UNCLE WIGGILY'S ADVENTURES
UNCLE WIGGILY'S AUTOMOBILE
UNCLE WIGGILY ON THE FARM
UNCLE WIGGILY'S BUNGALOW
UNCLE WIGGILY'S FORTUNE
UNCLE WIGGILY'S TRAVELS
UNCLE WIGGILY'S AIRSHIP
* * * * *
Larger Uncle Wiggily Volumes
* * * * *
UNCLE WIGGILY'S PICTURE BOOK
_33 full colored illustrations and
32 in black and white_
UNCLE WIGGILY'S STORY BOOK
_16 full colored illustrations and
29 in black and white_
_Copyright 1913 by_
R. F. FENNO & COMPANY
UNCLE WIGGILY'S AUTOMOBILE
* * * * *
_Printed in the United States of America_
PUBLISHER'S NOTE
These stories appeared originally in the Evening News, of Newark, N.
J., and are reproduced in book form by the kind permission of the
publishers of that paper, to whom the author extends his thanks.
Uncle Wiggily's Automobile
* * * * *
STORY I
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE SORROWFUL CROW
Once upon a time, a good many years ago, there was an old rabbit
gentleman named Uncle Wiggily Longears. He was related to Johnnie and
Billie Bushytail, the squirrels, as well as being an Uncle to Sammie
and Susie Littletail, his rabbit nephew and niece. And Uncle Wiggily
lived near Jackie and Peetie Bow Wow, the puppy dogs, while, not far
away was the home of the Wibblewobble family of ducks, and across
the street, almost, around the corner by the old slump, were the Kat
children, and Neddie and Beckie Stubtail, the nice bear children.
One day Uncle Wiggily was not feeling very well, so he sent for Dr.
Possum, who soon came over. Dr. Possum found Uncle Wiggily sitting in
the rocking chair on the front porch of the hollow stump house where he
lived.
"Well, what is the trouble, Uncle Wiggily?" asked Dr. Possum, as he
looked over the tops of his glasses.
"I am sick," answered the rabbit gentleman.
"Sick; eh?" exclaimed Dr. Possum. "Let me see. Put out your tongue!"
Uncle Wiggily did so.
"Ha! Hum!" exclaimed Dr. Possum. "Yes, I think you are ill, and you
will have to do something for it right away."
"What will I have to do?" asked Uncle Wiggily, anxious-like, and his
nose twinkled like a star on a frosty night.
"You will simply have to go away," said Dr. Possum. "There is no help
for it."
"I don't see why!" exclaimed Uncle Wiggily, and he bent one of his long
ears forward and the other backward, until he looked as if he had the
letter V on top of his head. But, of course, he hadn't, for that letter
is in the reading book--or it was the last time I looked.
"Yes," said Dr. Possum, "you must go away."
"I don't see why," said Uncle Wiggily again. "Couldn't I get well at
home here?"
"No, you could not," replied Dr. Possum. "If you want me to tell you
the truth----"
"Oh, always tell the truth!" exclaimed Uncle Wiggily, quickly. "Always!"
"Well, then," said Dr. Possum, as he looked in his medicine case, to
see if he had any strong peppermint for Aunt Jerushia Ann, the little,
nervous old lady woodchuck. "Well, then, to tell you the truth, you are
getting too fat, and you must take more exercise."
"Exercise!" cried Uncle Wiggily. "Why! Don't I play a game of Scotch
checkers with Grandfather Goosey Gander, the old gentleman duck, nearly
every day? And we always eat the sugar cookies we use for checkers."
"That's just it," said Dr. Possum, as he rolled up a sweet sugar-pill
for Sammie Littletail, the mill rabbit boy; "you eat too much, and you
don't jump around enough."
"But I used to," said Uncle Wiggily, while he twinkled his pink nose
like a red star on a frosty night. "Why, don't you remember the time
I went off and had a lot of adventures, and how I traveled after my
fortune, and found it?"
"That is just the trouble," spoke Dr. Possum. "You found your fortune,
and since you became rich you do nothing. I remember the time when you
used to teach Sammie and Susie Littletail how to keep out of traps, and
how to dig burrows and watch out for savage dogs."
"Ah, yes!" sighed Uncle Wiggily. "Those were happy days."
"And healthful days, too," said Dr. Possum. "You were much better off
then, and not so fat."
"And so you think I had better start traveling again?" asked Uncle
Wiggily, taking off his high hat and bowing politely to Uncle Lettie,
the nice goat lady, who was passing by, with her two horns sticking
through holes in her Sunday-go-to-meeting bonnet.
"Yes, it would be the best thing for you," spoke Dr. Possum. "Medicine
is all right sometimes, but fresh air, and sunshine, and being
out-of-doors, and happy and contented, and helping people, as Uncle
Booster, the old ground hog gentleman, used to do--all these are better
than medicine."
"How is Uncle Booster, by the way?" inquired the rabbit gentleman.
"Fine! He helped a little girl mouse to jump over a mud puddle the
other day, and after she was on the other side she jumped back, all by
herself, and fell in," said Dr. Possum, with a laugh. "That's the kind
of a gentleman Uncle Booster is!"
"Ha! Ha!" exclaimed Uncle Wiggily. "That's queer! But now do you think
it would do me any good to start off and have some adventures in my
automobile?"
"It would be better to walk," said Dr. Possum. "Remember you called me
in to tell you what was the matter with you, because you felt ill. And
I tell you that you must go around more; take more exercise. Still, if
you had rather go in your auto than walk, I have no objections."
"I had much rather," said Uncle Wiggily. "I like my auto."
"Then," said Dr. Possum, "I will write that as a prescription." So on a
piece of white birch bark he wrote:
"One auto ride every day, to be taken
before meals.
Dr. Possum."
"I'll do it at once," said the rabbit gentleman.
Uncle Wiggily Longears was a quite rich, you know, having found his
fortune, of about a million yellow carrots, as I have told you in some
other stories, so he could afford to have an auto.
And it was the nicest auto you could imagine. It had a turnip for a
steering wheel, and whenever Uncle Wiggily got hungry he could take a
bite of turnip. Sometimes after a long trip the steering wheel would
be all eaten up, and old Circus Dog Percival, who mended broken autos,
would have to put on a new wheel.
And to make a noise, so that no one would get run over by his machine,
Uncle Wiggily had a cow's horn fastened on his auto; so instead of
going "Honk-honk!" like a duck, it went "Moo! Moo!" like a bossy cow at
supper time.
"Well, if I'm going off for my health, I'd better start," said Uncle
Wiggily, as he went out to his auto after Dr. Possum had gone. "I'll
take a long ride."
So he got in the machine, and pushed on the doodle-oodle-um, and
twisted the tinkerum-tankerum, and away he went as fast as anything, if
not faster.
Over the fields and through the woods he went, and pretty soon he came
to a place where lived a sorrowful crow gentleman. The crow is a black
bird, and it pulls up corn and goes "Caw! Caw! Caw!" Nobody knows why,
though.
And this crow was very sorrowful. He was always thinking something
unpleasant was going to happen, such as that he was going to drop his
ice cream cone in the mud, or that somebody would put whitewash on him.
Oh, he was very sorrowful, was this crow, and his name was Mr. Caw-caw.
When Uncle Wiggily got to where the crow was sitting in a tree the
black creature cried:
"Oh, dear! O woe is me! O unhappiness!"
"Why, what is the matter?" asked Uncle Wiggily, curious-like!
"Oh, something is going to happen!" cried the crow. "I know it will
rain or snow or freeze, or maybe my feathers will all blow off."
"Don't be silly!" said Uncle Wiggily. "You just come for an auto ride
with me, and you'll feel better. Come along, bless your black tail!"
So Mr. Caw-caw got into the auto, and once more Uncle Wiggily started
off. He had not gone very far before, all of a sudden, there was a
bangity-bang noise, and the auto stopped so quickly that Uncle Wiggily
and the crow were almost thrown out of their seats.
"There!" cried the black crow. "I knew something would happen!" and he
cried "Caw! Caw! Caw!"
"It is nothing at all," said the rabbit gentleman as he got out to
look. "Only the whizzicum-whazzicum has become twisted around the
jump-over-the-clothes basket, and we can't go until it's fixed."
"Can't go?" asked the crow.
"Can't go--no," said Uncle Wiggily. And he didn't know what to do. But
just then along came Old Dog Percival, who used to work in a circus.
"I'll pull you along," he said. "You sit in the auto and steer, and
I'll pull you." And he did, by a rope fast to the car. The crow said it
was funny to have a circus dog pulling an auto, but Uncle Wiggily did
not mind, and soon they were at a place where the auto could be fixed.
So Uncle Wiggily and the crow waited there, while the machine was being
mended.
"And we will see what happens to us to-morrow," said Uncle Wiggily,
"for I am going to travel on." And he did. And in case the jumping rope
doesn't skip over the clock, and make the hands tickle the face I'll
tell you next about Uncle Wiggily and the school teacher.
STORY II
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE SCHOOL TEACHER
Uncle Wiggily Longears, the nice old gentleman rabbit, was riding
along in his automobile, with the turnip for a steering wheel, and he
had not yet taken more than two bites out of the turnip, for it was
only shortly after breakfast. With him was Mr. Caw-caw, the black crow
gentleman.
"Do you think your automobile will go all right now?" asked the crow,
as he looked down from his seat at the big wheels which had German
sausages around for tires, so in case Old Percival, the circus dog, got
hungry, he could eat one for lunch.
"Oh yes, it will go all right now," said the rabbit gentleman.
"Specially since we have had it fixed."
I think, if I am not mistaken, and in case the cat has not eat up all
the bacon, that I told you in the story before this one how Uncle
Wiggily had been advised by Dr. Possum to go traveling around for his
health and how he had started off in the auto. Did I tell you that?
He met Mr. Caw-caw and the tinkle-inkle-um on the auto broke, or else
it was the widdle-waddle-um. Anyhow, it wouldn't go, and Old Dog
Percival, coming along, pulled the machine to the fixing place. Then
Uncle Wiggily and Mr. Caw-caw slept all night and now it was daylight
again and they had started off once more.
"It is a lovely morning," said Uncle Wiggily, as he drove the machine
over the fields and through the woods. "A lovely spring day!"
"But we may get an April shower before night," said Mr. Caw-caw, the
crow gentleman, who had black feathers and who was always sad instead
of being happy. "Oh, dear, I'm sure it will rain," he said.
"Nonsensicalness!" cried Uncle Wiggily, swinging his ears around just
like some circus balloons trying to get away from an elephant eating
peanuts. "Cheer up! Be happy!"
"Well, if it doesn't rain it will snow," said the sad crow.
"Oh, cheer up," said Uncle Wiggily, as he took another bite out of the
turnip steering wheel. "Have a nibble," he went on politely. "It may
only blow."
"I'm sure it will do something," spoke the gloomy crow. "Anyhow I don't
care for turnip."
"Have some corn then," said Uncle Wiggily.
"Is it popped?" asked the crow.
"No, but I can pop it," said the old gentleman rabbit. "I will pop it
on my automobile engine, which gets very hot, almost like a gas stove."
So the old rabbit gentleman, who was riding around in his auto to take
exercise, because he was getting too fat, and Dr. Possum had said so,
popped the corn on the hot engine, and very good it was, too, for the
crow to eat.
But even the popcorn could not seem to make the unhappy crow feel
better, and he cried so much, as the auto went along, that his tears
made a mud-puddle in the road where they happened to be just then.
And the auto wheels, with the German bologna sausages on for tires,
splashed in the mud and made it fly all over like anything.
Then, just as Uncle Wiggily steered the auto right away from the road
into a nice green wood, where the leaves were just coming out on the
trees, the old gentleman rabbit heard some one saying:
"Oh, dear! Oh, dear me! I know I'll never be at school on time! Oh,
what a bad accident!"
"My!" cried Uncle Wiggily. "What can that be?"
"Oh, something dreadful, you may be sure," said Mr. Caw-caw, the crow
gentleman. "Oh, I just knew something would happen on this trip."
"Well, let it happen!" said Uncle Wiggily. "I like things to happen.
This seems to be some one in trouble, and I am going to help, whoever
it is."
"Then please help me," said the voice.
"Who are you?" asked Uncle Wiggily.
"I am the lady mouse school teacher," said some one they could not see,
"and on my way to school I ran a thorn in my foot, so I cannot walk. If
I am not there on time to open the school, the children will not know
what to do. Oh, isn't it terrible!"
"Say no more!" cried Uncle Wiggily, cheerfully. "You shall ride to
school in my auto. Then you will be there on time, and the animal
children will not have to go home and miss their lessons. I am so glad
I can help you. Isn't it horribly jolly to help people?" cried Uncle
Wiggily to the crow, just as an English rabbit might have done.
"Ha! It's jolly, all right, if you can help them," said the crow. "But
I'm sure something will happen. Some bad elephant will eat off our
sausage tires, or a cow will drink the gasoline, or we shall roll down
a hill."
"Nonsensicalness!" cried Uncle Wiggily, real exasperated-like, which
means bothered. "Get in, Miss Mouse School Teacher," he said, "and I
will soon have you at your classes."
So the lady mouse school teacher got into the auto, and sat beside Mr.
Caw-caw, who asked her how many six and seven grains of corn were.
"Thirteen," said the nice mouse school teacher.
"Thirteen in the winter," spoke the crow, "but I mean in summer."
"Six and seven are thirteen in summer just as in winter," said the lady
mouse.
"Wrong," croaked the crow. "If you plant thirteen grains of corn in
summer you'll get thirteen stalks, each with thirteen ears of corn on,
and each ear has five hundred and sixty-three grains, and thirteen
times thirteen times five hundred and sixty-three makes--how many does
it make?" he asked of Uncle Wiggily suddenly.
"Oh, please stop!" cried the lady mouse school teacher; "you make my
head ache."
"How much is one headache and two headaches?" asked the crow, who
seemed quite curious.
"Stop! Stop!" cried Uncle Wiggily, as he took a bite out of the turnip
steering wheel. "You will make the auto turn a somersault."
"How much," said the crow, "is one somersault and one peppersault added
to a mustard plaster and divided by----"
"There you go!" suddenly cried Uncle Wiggily as the auto hit a stone
and stopped. "You've made the plunkity-plunk bite the wizzie-wazzie!"
"Oh, dear!" cried the crow. "I knew something would happen!"
"Well, it was your fault," said Uncle Wiggily. "Now I'll have to have
the auto fixed again."
"Can't we go on to school?" asked the lady mouse teacher anxiously.
"No, I am sorry to say, we cannot," said Uncle Wiggily.
"Then I shall be late, and the children will all run home after all.
Oh, dear!"
"I knew something--" began the crow.
"Stop it!" cried Uncle Wiggily, provoked-like.
The lady mouse school teacher did not know what to do, and it looked as
if she would be late, for even when Uncle Wiggily had crawled under the
auto, and had put pepper on the German sausage tires, he could not make
the machine go.
But, just as the school teacher was going to be late, along came flying
Dickie Chip-Chip, the sparrow boy, with his new airship. And in the
airship he gave the lady mouse school teacher a ride to school up above
the tree tops, so she was not late after all.
She called a good-by to Uncle Wiggily, who some time afterward had his
auto fixed again, and then he and the crow gentleman went on and had
more adventures. What the next one was I'll tell you on the next page,
when the story will be about Uncle Wiggily and the candy--that is, if a
little Montclair girl, named Cora, doesn't eat too much peanut brittle,
and get her hair so sticky that the brush can't comb it.
STORY III
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE CANDY
Uncle Wiggily, the nice old gentleman rabbit, was riding along in his
automobile, with the turnip for a steering wheel and big, fat German
bologna sausages on for tires. On the seat beside Uncle Wiggily was the
crow gentleman, named Mr. Caw-caw.
"Well, where do you think you will go to-day?" asked the crow
gentleman, as he straightened out some of his black feathers with his
black bill, for the wind had ruffled them all up.
"Where will I go?" repeated Uncle Wiggily, as he steered to one side
so he would not run over a stone and hurt it, "well, to tell you the
truth--I hardly know. Dr. Possum, when he told me to ride around for my
health, because I was getting too fat, did not say where I was to go,
in particular."
"Then let's go straight ahead," said the crow. "I don't like going
around in a circle; it makes me dizzy."
"And it does me, also," spoke the rabbit gentleman. "That is why I
never can ride much on a merry-go-'round, though I often take Johnnie
or Billie Bushytail, my squirrel nephews, or Buddy and Brighteyes, the
guinea pig children, on one for a little while. But, Mr. Crow, we will
go straight ahead in my auto, and we will see what adventure happens to
us next."
For you know something was always happening to Uncle Wiggily as he
traveled around. Sometimes it was one thing, and sometimes another. You
remember, I dare say, how, the day before, he had nearly helped to keep
the nice lady mouse school teacher from being late.
Well, pretty soon, as Uncle Wiggily and the crow gentleman were riding
in the auto, all at once they looked down the road and saw a little
girl sitting on a stone. She had a box in her hands and she was trying
to open it. But she was crying so hard that she could not see out of
her eyes, because of her tears, and so she could not open the box.
"My goodness me sakes alive, and some roast beef gravy!" cried Uncle
Wiggily, as he stopped the auto. "What can be the matter with that
child?" For you know Uncle Wiggily loved children.
Then the old gentleman rabbit blew on the cow's horn, that was on his
auto to warn people kindly to get out of danger, and the cow's horn
went "Moo! Moo! Moo!" very softly, three times just like that.
The little girl looked up through her tears, and when she saw Uncle
Wiggily and the crow gentleman in the auto, she smiled and asked:
"Where is the mooley cow?"
"Only her horn is here," said Uncle Wiggily, as he made it go "Moo!"
again.
"Oh, dear," said the little girl. "I just love a mooley cow," and she
was going to cry some more, because there was no cow to be seen, when
Uncle Wiggily asked:
"What is the matter? Why are you crying?"
"Because I can't get this box open," said the little girl, whose name
was Cora.
"What is in the box?" asked the rabbit gentleman.
"Candy," said little Cora. "I just love candy, and I haven't had any
in ever so long. Now my papa gave me a box, but the string is tied on
it so tightly that I can't get the box open, and my papa went away and
forgot about it. Oh, dear. Boo! hoo! Can you open it for me, Uncle
Wiggily?"
The rabbit gentleman thought for a moment. Then he said, with a twinkle
in his eyes that matched the twinkle in his nose:
"Well, possibly I might untie the string, but you see my teeth are
so big and sharp, and are so used to gnawing wood, and bark and
carrots, and I can't see very well, even with my glasses, so I might
accidentally, when I bite through the string I might, by mistake, also
bite through the box, and eat the candy myself."
"Oh, dear!" cried the little girl. Then she added quickly, as she
thought of her polite manners: "I wouldn't mind, Uncle Wiggily, if you
did eat some of the candy. Only open the box for me so I can get part
of it," she said.
"I think I have a better plan than that," said the old gentleman
rabbit. "I will ask Mr. Caw-caw, our crow friend here, to untie the
string for you. With his sharp bill this crow gentleman can easily
loosen the knot, and that, too, without danger of breaking the box and
taking any candy."
"Will he do it?" asked the little girl eagerly.
"To be sure, I will," said the crow gentleman, and he loosened that
knot then and there with his sharp bill, which seemed just made for
such things.
"Oh, what lovely candy!" cried the little girl, as she took the cover
off the box. "I am going to give you each some!" she added. And she
gave Mr. Caw-caw some candy flavored with green corn, for he liked
that best of all, and to Uncle Wiggily she gave some nice, soft,
squishie-squashie candy, with a carrot inside. And the little girl ate
some chocolate candy for herself, and did not cry any more.
"Get in my auto," said Uncle Wiggily, "and I will give you a ride.
Perhaps we may have an adventure."
"Oh, I just love adventures!" said little Cora. "I love them even
better than candy. But we can eat candy in the auto anyhow," she went
on, with a laugh, as she climbed up in the seat.
Then Uncle Wiggily turned the tinkerum-tankerum, and with a feather
tickled the whizzicum-whazzicum to make the auto go, and it went. The
old rabbit gentleman made the cow's horn blow "Moo! Moo!" and away they
started off through the woods.
They had not gone very far, and Cora had eaten only about six pieces of
candy, when they heard a voice behind them shouting:
"Wait for me! Wait for me! I want a ride!"
"Ha!" cawed the crow, "who can that be?"
"I'll look," said Uncle Wiggily, and he did. Then he exclaimed: "Oh,
dear! It's the circus elephant. And he's grown so big lately, that if
he gets in with us he will break my auto."
"Don't let him do it then," said Mr. Caw-caw.
"I don't believe I will," said Uncle Wiggily.
"But would it be polite not to give him a ride?" asked the little girl,
as she ate another piece of candy.
"No, you are right, it would not," said Uncle Wiggily, decidedly. "I
must give him a ride, but he's sure to break my auto, and then I can't
ride around for my health any more, and stop getting fat. Oh, dear,
what a predicament!" A predicament means trouble, you know.
Then the elephant called again:
"I say, hold on there! I want a ride!" and he came on as fast as
anything. Uncle Wiggily was going to stop, and let the big creature get
in, when the crow gentleman said:
"I have it! We'll pretend we don't hear him. We'll keep right on, and
not stop, and then it won't be impolite, for he will think we didn't
listen to what he said."
"That's it," said Uncle Wiggily. "We'll do that. Pachy is the dearest
old chap in the world, you know, but he really is too big for this
auto." Pachy was the elephant's name, you see.
So Uncle Wiggily made the auto go faster, and still the elephant ran
after it, calling:
"Stop! Stop! I want a ride!"
"He's catching up to us," said the crow, looking back.
"Oh, dear!" cried Uncle Wiggily, "what's to be done?"
"I know what to do," spoke Cora. "I'll drop some pieces of candy in the
road for him, and when he stops to eat them we can get so far away he
can't catch up to us."
"Please do," begged Uncle Wiggily, and the little girl did. And when
the elephant saw the pieces of candy, being very fond of sweet things,
he stopped to pick them up in his trunk and eat them.
And it took him quite a while, for the candy was well scattered about.
And when the elephant had eaten the last piece Uncle Wiggily and the
crow, and little girl, were far off in the auto and the elephant could
not catch them to break the machine; though even if he had smashed it
he would not have meant to do so.
So Uncle Wiggily rode on, looking for more adventures, and he soon
found one. I'll tell you about it in the next story, which will be
called, "Uncle Wiggily at the Squirrel House;"--that is if the clothes
wringer doesn't squeeze the rubber ball so it cries and makes water
come in the eyes of the potatoes.
STORY IV
UNCLE WIGGILY AT THE SQUIRREL HOUSE
Uncle Wiggily, the nice old gentleman rabbit, was standing one day in
front of his new automobile which had run away with him upsetting, and
breaking one of the wheels. But it had been fixed all right again.
"I think this automobile will go fine now," said Uncle Wiggily to
himself, as he got up on the front seat. "Now, I am ready to start off
on some more travels, and in search of more adventures, and this time
I won't have to walk. Now let me see, do I turn on the fizzle-fazzle
first or the twinkum-twankum? I forget."
So he looked carefully all over the automobile to see if he could
remember what first to turn to make it go, but he couldn't think what
it was. Because, you see, he was all excited over his accident. I
didn't tell you that story because I thought it might make you cry. It
was very sad. The crow gentleman flew away after it.
"I guess I'll have to look in the cookbook," said Uncle Wiggily.
"Perhaps that will tell me what to do."
So he took out a cookbook from under the seat and leafed it over until
he came to the page where it tells how to cook automobiles, and there
he found what he wanted to know.
"Ha! I see!" cried Uncle Wiggily; "first I must twist the
dinkum-dankum, and then I must tickle the tittlecum-tattlecum, and then
I'll go."
Well, he did this, and just as he was about to start off on his journey
out came running Sammie and Susie Littletail, the two rabbit children,
with whom Uncle Wiggily sometimes lived.
"Oh, Uncle Wiggily!" cried Susie, "where are you going?"
"And may we come along?" asked Sammie, making his nose twinkle like two
stars on a night in June.
"I am going off on a long journey, for my health, and to look for more
adventures," said the old gentleman rabbit. "I am tired of staying
around the house taking medicine for my rheumatism. So Dr. Possum told
me to travel around. I don't just know where I am going, but I am going
somewhere, and if you like you may come part of the way. Hop in."
Sammie and Susie hopped in the back part of the auto, where there
were two little seats for them, and then Uncle Wiggily turned the
whizzicum-whazzicum around backward and away they went as nicely as the
baby creeps over the floor to catch the kittie by the tail; only you
mustn't do that, you know; indeed not!
"Oh, isn't this great?" cried Susie, in delight.
"It certainly is," agreed Sammie, blinking his pink eyes because the
wind blew in them. "I hope Uncle Wiggily has an adventure while we're
with him."
And then, all of a sudden, a doggie ran across the road in front of the
auto, and the doggie's tail was hanging down behind him and sticking
out quite a bit, and, as it was quite a long tail, Uncle Wiggily nearly
ran over it, but, of course, he didn't mean to, even if he had done it.
"Look out of the way, little doggie!" cried the old gentleman rabbit,
kindly.
"I am looking as fast as I can!" cried the doggie, and he ran to the
sidewalk as quickly as he could, and then he turned around to see if
his tail was still fastened to him.
"That came near being an adventure," said Susie, waving her pocket
handkerchief.
"Yes, almost too near," said Uncle Wiggily. "I think I will go through
the woods instead of along the streets, and then I won't be in any
danger of running over any one."
So he steered the auto toward the woodland road, and Sammie cried:
"Oh, I know what let's do! Let's go call on Johnnie and Billie
Bushytail, the squirrel boys. Then we'll have some fun."
"All right, we'll do it," agreed Uncle Wiggily, for he liked fun as
much as the children did, if not more.
Well, as they were going along the road, all of a sudden they heard a
little voice calling to them.
"Oh, please don't run over me!" the voice cried. "Please be careful!"
And, looking down, Sammie saw a little black cricket on the path just
ahead of the auto, which Uncle Wiggily was now making go very slowly.
"Why don't you get out of the way if you don't want to be run over?"
asked Susie, politely, for the cricket just stood still there, looking
at them, and not making a move.
"Oh, I'm so stiff from the cold that I can't hop about any more," said
the cricket, "or else I would hop out of the way. You know I can't
stand cold weather."
[Illustration]
"That's too bad," said Uncle Wiggily as he stopped the auto. "I'll give
you a ride, and perhaps I can find some warm place for you to spend the
winter."
So the old gentleman rabbit kindly picked up the cold and stiff cricket
and gave it to Susie, and Susie gently put it in the warm pocket of her
jacket, and there it was so nice and cozy-ozy that the cricket went
fast to sleep.
And then, in about forty-'leven squeak-squawk toots of the big
mooley-cow automobile horn, there they were at the home of Johnnie and
Billy Bushytail, the squirrel brothers.
"Toot! Toot!" tooted Uncle Wiggily on his tooter-tooter mooley-cow horn.
"There! I guess that will bring out the boys if they are in the house,"
said the old gentleman rabbit.
And then, all of a sudden, something happened. Susie and Sammie were
looking at the front door, expecting Johnnie and Billie to come out,
when Susie saw a great big bear's face up at one window of the squirrel
house.
"Oh! Look! Look!" she cried. "The bear has gotten in and maybe he has
bitten Johnnie."
And just then Sammie looked at the other window and he saw a wolf's
face peering out.
"Oh, dear!" cried Sammie, "the wolf has gotten Billie."
"My gracious!" exclaimed Uncle Wiggily. "I'm going for the police
right away. Hold on tightly, children, for I am going to twist the
tinkerum-tankerum and make this automobile go very fast. Oh! how sorry
I am for poor Johnnie and Billie."
But just before Uncle Wiggily could start the auto, there was a shout
of laughter. The front door of the Bushytail home swung open, and out
rushed Billie and Johnnie, jumping and skipping. And Johnnie had a
wolf's false face in his paws and Billie had a bear's false face in his
paws.
"Ho! Ho!" they shouted together. "Did we scare you, Uncle Wiggily? We
didn't mean to, but we were just practising."
"Was that you boys looking out of the windows with your false faces
on?" asked Uncle Wiggily very much surprised-like.
"That was us," said Johnnie.
"And wasn't there a real bear?" asked Susie, flapping her ears.
"And wasn't it a real wolf?" asked Sammie, wiggling his paws.
"Not a bit," said Billie. "We're just getting ready for Hallowe'en
to-morrow night, and those were our false faces, you know, and I wish
you'd all stay with us and have some fun."
"We will," said Uncle Wiggily. "I'll put my auto in the barn, and we'll
stay."
So they did, and in case the little wooden dog with the pink-blue nose
doesn't bite the tail of the woolly cat, I'll tell you next about Uncle
Wiggily having Hallowe'en fun.
STORY V
UNCLE WIGGILY'S HALLOWE'EN FUN
"Oh, dear, I wish it were night," said Susie Littletail.
"So do I!" exclaimed Sammie, her brother. "Then it would be Hallowe'en."
"And both of us wish the same thing," said Johnnie Bushytail, as he and
his brother Billie went skipping about the room of their house.
"Oh, don't wish so hard or night might come before I'm ready for it,"
said Uncle Wiggily Longears, the old gentleman rabbit. "I've got to
decorate my auto yet and get my false face, you know."
"What kind are you going to have?" asked Susie.
"Oh, I think I'll dress up like an elephant," said Uncle Wiggily.
"But what will you do for a trunk?" asked Mrs. Bushytail, for, you see,
Uncle Wiggily and Sammie and Susie had stayed at the squirrel's house
to have some fun. This was the first place the old gentleman rabbit
came to after starting out in his auto for his health, and after some
fresh adventures. "What will you do for an elephant's trunk?" asked
Mrs. Bushytail.
"I will take a long stocking and stuff it full of soft cotton so it
will look just like an elephant's face," said Uncle Wiggily. "Then I'll
go out with the children in my auto and we'll have a lot of fun."
So all that day they got ready for the Hallowe'en fun they were to have
that night. Johnnie and Billie had their false faces, you remember;
Johnnie had a wolf's face and Billie a bear's, and they were too cute
for anything. But, of course, Sammie and Susie Littletail and Uncle
Wiggily had to have some false faces also, and it took quite a while
for the rabbit children to decide what they wanted.
"I think I'll dress up like a wild Indian," said Sammie at last.
"And I'm going to be a pussy cat," said Susie.
"And if any dogs chase you, I'll growl at them, and scare them away,"
said Billie, who was going to be a make-believe bear.
"Yes, and I'll tickle them with my stuffed-stocking elephant's trunk,"
said Uncle Wiggily. "Now, I must go out and put some oil and gasoline
in my auto, and see that the frizzle-frazzle works all right, so we can
go Hallowe'en riding to-night."
Finally the animal children were all ready, and they were waiting for
it to get dark so they could go out. And, pretty soon, after supper,
when the sun had gone to bed, it did get dark. Then the four animal
children and Uncle Wiggily went out in the auto.
Say, I just wish you could have seen them; really I do! and I'd show
you a picture of them, only I'm not allowed to do that. And besides it
was too dark to see pictures well, so perhaps it doesn't much matter.
Oh, but they were the funny looking sights, though! Billy Bushytail
acted like a real bear, growling as hard as ever he could, though, of
course, he was polite about it, as it was only fun. And what a savage
make-believe wolf Johnnie was!
And there was Susie, as cute a little pussy cat as one would meet with
in going from here to the moon and back. And as for Sammie, well, say,
he was so much like a real Indian that when he looked in the glass
he was frightened at himself; yes, really he was, and he had truly
feathers on, too; not make-believe ones, either.
Uncle Wiggily was dressed up like an elephant, and he sat in the front
of the auto to steer it. Only his stuffed-stocking trunk got in the
way of the steering wheel, so Uncle Wiggily had to put it behind him,
over his left shoulder and have Susie hold it. I mean she held his
stuffed-stocking trunk, not the steering wheel, you know.
"Here we go!" suddenly cried Uncle Wiggily, and his voice sounded far
away because it had to go down inside the stuffed-stocking elephant
trunk and come out again around in back of him. Then he twisted the
tinkerum-tankerum, and away they went in the automobile.
All at once, from around a corner, came a big clown with red, white and
blue all over his face. He had a rattlety-bang-banger thing and he was
making a terrible racket on it.
"Oh, I know who that is!" cried Susie. "You're Jimmie Wibblewobble, the
boy duck."
"That's right," said the clown, making more noise than ever.
"Whoop-de-doodle-do! Isn't this fun!"
Along went the auto and by this time there were a whole lot of animal
children prancing and dancing around it. Uncle Wiggily had to make the
auto go real slowly so as not to hurt any of them, for they were all
over the streets.
There was Buddy Pigg, dressed up like a camel, and there was Dickie
Chip-Chip and his sister, and they were dressed up like sailors.
Brighteyes Pigg had on a cow's false face and Billie Goat was dressed
up like a Chinaman, while Nannie, his sister, was supposed to be a lady
with a sealskin coat on. Oh, I couldn't tell you how all the different
animal children were dressed, but I'll just say that Bully, the frog,
with his tall hat, was dressed like a football player and Aunt Lettie,
the nice old lady goat, made believe she was a fireman, and Munchie
Trot was a pretend-policeman.
And such fun as they had! Uncle Wiggily steered the auto here and
there, and squeaked and squawked his tooter-teeter so no one would get
hurt. There were about forty-'leven tin horns being blown, and the
wooden rattlety-bang-bangs were rattling all over and some one threw a
whole lot of prettily colored paper in the air until it looked as if it
were raining red, pink, green, purple, blue, yellow and skilligimink
colored snow.
And then, all at once, out from the crowd, came a figure that looked
like a bear. Oh, it was very real looking with long teeth, and shaggy
fur, and that bear came right up to the auto that Uncle Wiggily was
steering.
"I've come to get you!" growled the bear, away down in his throat.
"Oh, he's almost real!" exclaimed Susie, and she forgot that she was
holding Uncle Wiggily's stuffed-stocking trunk, and let go of it, so
that it hung down in front of him.
"I am a real bear!" growled the shaggy creature.
"Oh, you can't fool us," said Johnnie Bushytail, with a laugh. "You're
Jacko or Jumpo Kinkytail dressed up like a bear, just as my brother
Billie is. You can't fool us."
"But I am a real bear!" growled the shaggy creature again, "and I'm
hungry so I'm going to bite Uncle Wiggily."
And, would you ever believe it? he was a real bear who had come in from
the woods. He made a grab for Uncle Wiggily, but the old gentleman
rabbit leaned far back in his auto seat, and the bear only got hold of
the stuffed-stocking trunk. And then the bear pulled on that so hard
that it came all apart and the cotton stuffing came out, and got up the
bear's nose and made him sneeze.
And then up came running Munchie Trot, the pony boy, who was dressed
like a policeman, and with his club Munchie tickled the bear on his
ear, and that shaggy creature was glad enough to run back to the woods,
taking his little stubby tail with him, so he didn't eat anybody.
"My, it's a good thing, I didn't have on a real elephant's trunk," said
Uncle Wiggily, "or that bear would have bitten it off, for real trunks
are fastened on tight."
"Yes, indeed," said Susie. So after everybody got over being scared
at the real bear they had a lot of fun and Uncle Wiggily took all the
children to a store and treated them to hot chocolate, and then he and
Sammie and Susie and Billie and Johnnie went home in the auto, and went
to bed. And Uncle Wiggily had another adventure next day.
I'll tell you about it on the page after this, when, in case it doesn't
rain lightning bugs down the chimney, the story will be about Uncle
Wiggily going chestnutting.
STORY VI
UNCLE WIGGILY GOES CHESTNUTTING
"Where are you going this morning, Uncle Wiggily?" asked Johnnie
Bushytail of the old gentleman rabbit the day after the Hallowe'en fun.
"Oh, I am going to take a ride and see if I can find any more
adventures," said Uncle Wiggily, as he went out in the barn to
look and see if his auto had any holes in the rubber tires,
or if the what-you-may-call-it had gotten twisted around the
whose-this-cantankerum.
"May I go with you?" asked Billie Bushytail, as he followed Uncle
Wiggily. "We don't want you to go away from our house so soon. We'd
like to have you pay us a nice, long visit."
"Hum, well, I'll think about it," said Uncle Wiggily, slowly, and
careful-like. "I'll stay as long as I can. But as for you squirrel boys
going for a ride in my auto, why I guess you may come if your mamma
will let you. Yes, it's all ready for a spin," he went on, as he saw
that the tiddle-taddleum was on straight, and that the wheels had no
holes in them.
"Oh, goody! Come on!" cried Billie to Johnnie; so into the house they
hurried to ask their mamma, and she said they might go.
A little later, with the squirrel boys sitting in the back part of the
auto, away they went, Uncle Wiggily steering here and there and taking
care not to run over any puppy-dogs' tails or over any alligators'
noses.
"Are you going off in the woods?" asked Johnnie, as he saw the old
gentleman rabbit steering toward the tree-forest.
"I think I will," answered Uncle Wiggily. "I want to see Grandfather
Goosey Gander, and if we go through the woods that is the shortest way
to his house."
"Then, perhaps, we can stop and gather some chestnuts," said Johnnie.
"There may be a few left that the other squirrels haven't yet picked
up, and I heard papa saying to mamma the other night that we need a
whole lot more than we have, so we wouldn't be hungry this winter."
"Oh, yes; let's get chestnuts!" cried Billie.
"All right," answered Uncle Wiggily, smiling, and then he had to turn
the auto to one side very quickly, for a fuzzy worm was hurrying along
the path, on her way to the grocery store, and Uncle Wiggily didn't
want to run over her, you know.
"Thank you very much for not squashing me flat like a pancake," said
the worm, as she wiggled along.
"Oh, pray do not mention such a little thing," said Uncle Wiggily,
politely. "I am always glad to do you a favor like that."
Then he turned the handle so some more gasoline would squirt into the
fizzle-fozzleum, and away the automobile went faster than ever.
Pretty soon they came to the woods, and Johnnie and Billie began
looking about for chestnut trees. Squirrels, you know, can tell a
chestnut tree a great way off, and soon Johnnie saw one.
"Stop the auto here, Uncle Wiggily," said Johnnie, "and we'll see if
there are any chestnuts left."
So the old gentleman rabbit did this, and, surely enough, there were
quite a few of the brown nuts lying on the ground, partly covered with
leaves.
"Take a stick and poke around and you'll find more," said Billie to his
brother, and pretty soon all three of them, including Uncle Wiggily,
were picking up the nuts. Of course, the automobile couldn't pick up
any; it just had to stand still there, looking on. I guess you know
that, anyhow, but I just thought I'd mention it to make sure.
"Oh, here is another tree over there!" cried Johnnie after a while, as
he ran to a large one. "It's got heaps and heaps of chestnuts under it,
too. I guess no squirrels or any chipmunks have been here. Oh, we can
get lots of nuts to put away for winter!"
So the two squirrel boys filled their pockets with nuts, and so did
Uncle Wiggily, and they even put some in the automobile, though, of
course, the auto couldn't eat them, but it could carry them away. And
then, all of a sudden, Billie cried:
"Oh, I know what let's do! Let's build a little fire and roast some of
the chestnuts. They're fine roasted."
"I guess they are," said Uncle Wiggily, "and so we'll cook some,
though, as for me, I'd rather have a roast carrot or a bit of baked
apple."
"Maybe we can find some apples to bake while we're roasting the
chestnuts," said Billie. "We'll look."
They looked all around, and in a field not far from the woods they
found an apple tree and there were some apples on the ground under it.
They picked up quite a few and then they got some flat stones and made
a place to build a fire.
Uncle Wiggily lighted it, for it isn't good for children to have
anything to do with matches, and soon the fire was blazing up very
nicely and was quite hot.
"Now put the chestnuts down to roast on the hot stones," said the
rabbit gentleman, after a bit, to the two squirrel boys, "and I'll put
some apples on a sharp stick and hold them near the blaze to roast.
Why, boys! This is as much fun for me as a picnic!" he exclaimed
joyfully.
But listen! Something is going to happen. All of a sudden, as they were
sitting quietly around the fire and wishing the apples and chestnuts
would hurry up and roast, all of a sudden a man came along with a gun.
He stood by the fence that went around the field where they had picked
up the apples, and that man said, in a grillery-growlery voice:
"Ah, ha! So those squirrels and that rabbit have been taking my apples,
eh? I can smell 'em! Sniff! Snoof! Snuff! Well, I'll soon put a stop to
that! I'm glad I brought my gun along!"
He was just aiming his gun at poor Uncle Wiggily and also at Johnnie
and Billie Bushytail, and the rabbit and the squirrels didn't know what
in the world to do, for they were too frightened to run, when, all
of a sudden there was a tremendously loud bang-bang in the fire and
something flew out of it and hit that man right on the end of his nose.
"Ouch-ouchy!" the man cried.
"Bang!" went something again, and this time it flew over and hit the
man on his left ear. Now what do you think of that?
"Ouch! Ouchy!" the man yelled again.
"Bang!" went the noise for the third shot, and this time the man was
hit on his other ear.
"Ouch! Ouchy!" he cried again. "They're shooting at me. I'd better
run." And run away he did, taking his gun with him, and so Uncle
Wiggily and Johnnie and Billie weren't hurt.
"My, that was a narrow escape," said Johnnie. "What was it that made
the bang noise, and hit the man?"
"It was the roast chestnuts," said Uncle Wiggily, "I forgot to tell you
to make little holes in them before you roasted them or else they would
burst. And burst they did, and I'm glad of it, for they scared that
man. But I guess we had better be going now, for he may come back."
So they took the apples, which were nicely roasted now, and they took
the chestnuts that were left and which hadn't burst, and away they went
in the auto and had a fine ride, before going home to bed.
And now I'll say good-night, but in case the cow who jumped over the
moon doesn't kick our milk bottles off the back stoop, I'll tell you,
in the story after this one, about Uncle Wiggily and the pumpkin.
STORY VII
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE PUMPKIN
"Well," said Uncle Wiggily Longears one fine fresh morning, just after
the milkman had been around to leave some cream for the coffee, "I
think I will be traveling on again, Mrs. Bushytail."
"Oh, don't go yet!" begged Billie, the boy squirrel.
"No, you haven't made us a long visit at all," spoke his brother
Johnnie. "Can't you stay a long, long time?"
"Well, I promised Jimmie Wibblewobble, the boy duck, that I would come
in my new automobile and pay him and his sisters a visit," said the old
gentleman, as he wiggled first his left ear and then the right one to
see if there were any pennies stuck in them. And he found two pennies,
one for Johnnie and one for Billie.
"Oh, please stay with us a few more days. You can go visit the
Wibblewobble family next week," said Johnnie; "can't he, mother?"
"Yes, I really think you might stay with us a little longer," said
Mrs. Bushytail, as she was mending some holes in Johnnie's stocking.
"Besides, I thought you might do me a favor to-day, Uncle Wiggily."
"A favor!" exclaimed the old gentleman rabbit, making a low bow. "I am
always anxious to do you a favor if I can. What is it, Mrs. Bushytail?"
"Why, I thought you and the boys might like to go off in the automobile
and see if you could find me a nice, large yellow pumpkin," said the
squirrel lady.
"Oh, goody!" cried Billie. "I know what for--to make a Jack-o'-lantern
for us, eh, mamma?"
"Sure!" cried Johnnie, jumping up and down because he was so happy,
"and we'll take it out after dark, Billie, and have some fun with Bully
the frog."
"Oh, no, not a pumpkin for a Jack-o'-lantern," said Mrs. Bushytail.
"What I need a pumpkin for is to make some pies, and I thought you
might like to get one, Uncle Wiggily."
"Yes, indeed, I would!" exclaimed the old gentleman rabbit. "I am very
fond of hunting pumpkins for pies, and also eating them after they are
baked. I like pumpkin pie almost as much as I do cherry pie. Come on,
boys, let's get into the auto and we'll go look for a pumpkin."
"But don't go near that man's field who was going to shoot us the other
day because we took a few apples," said Billie, and Uncle Wiggily said
he wouldn't. So out they went to the barn, where the auto was kept,
leaving Mrs. Bushytail in the house mending stockings and getting ready
to bake the pumpkin pies.
"Here we go!" cried Uncle Wiggily, when he had tickled the
tinkerum-tankerum with a feather to make it sneeze.
Away went the auto, and as it rolled along on its big fat wheels Uncle
Wiggily sang a funny little song, like this:
"Pumpkin pie is my delight,
I eat it morning, noon and night,
It's very good to make you grow,
That's why the boys all love it so.
"If I could have my dearest wish,
I'd have some cherries in a dish.
And then a pumpkin pie, or two;
Of course, I'd save a piece for you.
"Perhaps, if we are good and kind,
A dozen pumpkins we may find,
We'll bring them home and stew them up,
And then on pumpkin pie we'll sup."
Well, after he had sung that song, Uncle Wiggily felt better. The auto
felt better also, I guess, for it ran along very fast, and, all of a
sudden, they came to a place where there was a field of pumpkins. Oh,
such lovely, large, golden yellow pumpkins as they were.
"Hurray!" cried Johnnie.
"Whoop-de-doodle-do!" cried Billie.
"Dear me hum suz dud!" cried Uncle Wiggily. "It couldn't be better. But
I wonder if these pumpkins would mind if we took one?"