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PECK'S BAD BOY WITH THE COWBOYS
By George W. Peck.
Author of Peck's Bad Boy Abroad, Peck's Bad Boy with the Circus, etc.
Relating the Amusing Experiences and Laughable Incidents of this
Strenuous American Boy and his Pa while among the Cowboys and Indians
in the Far West. Exciting Hunts and Adventures mingled with Humorous
Situations and Laugh Provoking Events.
Fully Illustrated
Chicago
John R. Stanton Co.
Publishers
Copyright 1905
By Joseph B. Bowles
Copyright 1906
By Joseph B. Bowles
Copyright 1907
By Thompson & Thomas
Made In U. S. A.
ILLUSTRATIONS (not available in this file)
“Got Any Trailing Dogs?” Frontispiece
Pa Kicked the Dog
The Grizzly Looked as Big as a Brewery Horse
They Gave Pa Three Cheers
The Squaws Seemed to be Worshipping Pa
The Horse Stumbled, Throwing Pa Over His Head and Killing the Wolf
He Looked Like Moonlight on the Lake
The Chiefs Knees Knocked Together
Pa Only Touched the High Places
A Boy Dinosaurus Reached Out His Neck and Picked Up a Steer
We Were Captured by the Curry's Gang
Pa Told Them About the Wave of Reform
Say to the Engineer--“Charley, Turn Her Off and Stop Her”
One Day the Robbers Came Back From a Raid With Piles of Greenbacks
Drank to the Health of Their Distinguished Guest
The Robbers Guided Us in the Dark Through the Valley
The Pony Tossed Pa in the Air
Pa Swung His Ax Handle
Pa Was Alive to His Danger
The Buffaloes Licked Pa's Bald Head--Pa Began to Pray
A Couple of Bouncers Took Pa by the Elbows and Fired Him Out
“Dog Does Kinder Act as Though He Had Something on His Mind”
“Jerusalem, But You Are a Sight,” Said the Old Groceryman
Dad Said, “Good Shot, Hennery”
“It Rained Bananas and the Dago Came Down on His Head”
“The Farmer Had Grabbed Hold of a Wire Sign Across the Street”
“Hennery, This Attempt on Your Part to Murder Me Was Not the Success You
Expected”
“Dad Sat in the Parlor With a Widow Until the Porter Had to Tell Him to
Cut it Out”
“I Got a Gambler to Look Cross at Dad”
“Dad Was Up On a Limb and the Wild Animals Were Jumping Up to Eat His
Shoes”
“Hennery, I Feel as Though Your Dad Was Not Long For This World”
Dad Among the Cowboys
“Dad Began to Pose as a Regular Old Rough Rider”
Dad On a Bucking Broncho
“That's a Prairie Dog From Texas”
“Dad Heard Something at Night and Rose Up in Bed”
“Dad Stepped On My Prairie Dog and Yelled Murder”
“We Left Under Escort of the Police”
“Arrest That Boy With the Rattlesnake,” Said the Groceryman
“Each Oyster Was As Big As a Pie Plate”
Landed With His Head in a Basket of Strictly Fresh Eggs
“You Ought to Have Seen Dad's Short Legs Carry Him to a Tree”
“Studied the Bears for Awhile and Let Dad Yell for the Police”
Come to Present Arms
When the Fireworks Went Off in the Grocery
“Dad Said if Rockefeller Could Raise Hair by the Sunshine Method, He
Could”
CHAPTER I.
The Bad Boy and His Pa Go West--Pa Plans to Be a Dead Ringer for Buffalo
Bill--They Visit an Indian Reservation and Pa Has an Encounter with a
Grizzly Bear.
Well, I never saw such a change in a man as there has been in pa, since
the circus managers gave him a commission to go out west and hire an
entire outfit for a wild west show, regardless of cost, to be a part
of our show next year. He acts like he was a duke, searching for a rich
wife. No country politician that never had been out of his own county,
appointed minister to England, could put on more style than Pa does.
The first day after the show left us at St. Louis we felt pretty bum,
'cause we missed the smell of the canvas, and the sawdust, and the
animals, and the indescribable odor that goes with a circus. We missed
the performers, the band, the surging crowds around the ticket wagon,
and the cheers from the seats. It almost seemed as though there had been
a funeral in the family, and we were sitting around in the cold parlor
waiting for the lawyers to read the will. But in a couple of days Pa got
busy, and he hired a young Indian who was a graduate of Carlisle, as an
interpreter, and a reformed cowboy, to go with us to the cattle ranges,
and an old big game hunter who was to accompany us to the places where
we could find buffalo and grizzly bears. Pa chartered a car to take us
west, and after the Indian and the cowboy and the hunter got sobered
up, on the train, and got the St. Louis ptomaine poison out of their
systems, and we were going through Kansas, Pa got us all into the
smoking compartment.
“Gentlemen,” he said, “I want you to know that this expedition is backed
by the wealth of the circus world, and that there is nothing cheap about
it. We are to hire, regardless of expense, the best riders, the best
cattle ropers, and the best everything that goes with a wild west show.
We all know that Buffalo Bill must soon, in the nature of things, pass
away as a feature for shows, and I have been selected to take the place
of Bill in the circus world, when he cashes in. You may have noticed
that I have been letting my hair and mustache and chin whiskers grow the
last few months, so that next year I will be a dead ringer for Bill. All
I want is some experience as a hero of the plains, as a scout, a hunter,
a scalper of Indians, a rider of wild horses, and a few things like
that, and next year you will see me ride a white horse up in front of
the press seats in our show, take off my broad-brimmed hat, and wave it
at the crowned heads in the boxes, give the spurs to my horse, and
ride away like a cavalier, and the show will go on, to the music of
hand-clapping from the assembled thousands, see?”
The cowboy looked at pa's stomach, and said: “Well, Mr. Man, if you are
going to blow yourself for a second Buffalo Bill, I am with you, at the
salary agreed upon, till the cows come home, but you have got to show me
that you have got no yellow streak, when it comes to cutting out steers
that are wild and carry long horns, and you've got to rope 'em, and tie
'em all alone, and hold up your hands for judgment, in ten seconds.”
Pa said he could learn to do it in a week, but the cowman said: “Not on
your life.” The hunter said he would be ready to call pa B. Bill when he
could stand up straight, with the paws of a full-grown grizzly on each
of his shoulders, and its face in front of pa's, if Pa had the nerve to
pull a knife and disembowel the bear, and skin him without help. Pa said
that would be right into his hand, 'cause he use to work in a slaughter
house when he was a boy, and he had waded in gore.
The Indian said he would be ready to salute Pa as Buffalo Bill the
Second, when Pa had an Indian's left hand tangled in his hair, and a
knife in his right hand ready to scalp him, if Pa would look the Indian
in the eye and hypnotize the red man so he would drop the hair and the
knife, turn his back on pa, and invite him to his wigwam as a guest. Pa
said all he asked was a chance to look into the very soul of the worst
Indian that ever stole a horse, and he would make Mr. Indian penuk, and
beg for mercy.
And we all agreed that Pa was a wonder, and then they got out a pack of
cards and played draw poker awhile. Pa had bad luck, and when the Indian
bet a lot of chips, Pa began to look the Indian in the eye, and the
Indian began to quail, and Pa put up all the chips he had, to bluff the
Indian, but Pa took his eye off the Indian a minute too quick, and the
Indian quit quailing, and bet Pa $70, and Pa called him, and the Indian
had four deuces and pa had a full hand, and the Indian took the money.
Pa said that comes of educating these confounded red devils, at the
expense of the government, and then we all went to bed.
The next morning we were at the station in the far west. We got off and
started for the Indian reservation where the Carlisle Indian originally
came from, and where we were to hire Indians for our show. We rode about
40 miles in hired buckboards, and just as the sun was Setting there
appeared in the distance an Indian camp, where smoke ascended from
tepees, tents and bark houses. When the civilized Carlisle Indian jumped
up on the front seat of the buckboard and gave a series of yells that
caused pa's bald head to look ashamed that it had no hair to stand on
end, there came a war whoop from the camp, Indians, squaws, dogs, and
everything that contained a noise letting out yells that made me
sick. The Carlisle Indian began to pull off his citizen clothes of
civilization, and when the horses ran down to the camp in front of the
chief's tent the tribes welcomed the Carlisle prodigal son, who had
removed every evidence of civilization, except a pair of football pants,
and thus he reinstated himself with the affections of his race, who
hugged him for joy.
Pa and the rest of us sat in the buckboard while the Indians began
to feast on something cooking in a shack. We looked at each other for
awhile, not daring to make a noise for fear it would offend the Indians.
Pretty soon an old chief came and called Pa the Great Father, and called
me a pup, and he invited us to come into camp and partake of the feast.
Well, we were hungry, and the meat certainly tasted good, and the
Carlisle civilized Indian had no business to say it was dog, 'cause no
man likes to smoke his pipe of peace with strong tobacco in a strange
pipe, and feel that his stomach is full of dog meat. But we didn't die,
and all the evening the Indians talked about the brave great father.
It seemed that they were not going to take much stock in pa's bravery
until they had tried him out in Indian fashion. We were standing in the
moonlight surrounded by Indians, and Pa had been questioned as to his
bravery, and Pa said he was brave like Roosevelt, and he swelled out his
chest and looked the part, when the chief said, pointing to a savage,
snarling dog that was smelling of pa: “Brave man, kick a dog!”
We all told Pa that the Indian wanted Pa to give an exhibition of his
bravery by kicking the dog, and while I could see that Pa had rather
hire a man to kick the dog, he knew that it was up to him to show his
mettle, so he hauled off and gave the dog a kick near the tail, which
seemed to telescope the dog's spine together, and the dog landed far
away. The chief patted Pa on the shoulder and said: “Great Father, bully
good hero. Tomorrow he kill a grizzly,” and then they let us go to bed,
after Pa had explained that if everything went well he would hire all
the chiefs and young braves for his show.
[Illustration: Pa Kicked the Dog.]
After we got to bed Pa said he was almost sorry he told the chief that
he would take a grizzly bear by one ear, and cuff the other ear with the
flat of his hand, as he didn't know but a wild grizzly would look upon
such conduct differently from our old bear in the show used to. Any
person around the show could slap his face, or cuff him, or kick him in
the slats, and he would act as though they were doing him a favor. The
big game hunter told pa that there was no danger in hunting a grizzly,
as you could scare him away, if you didn't want to have any truck with
him, by waving your hat and yelling: “Git, Ephraim.” He said no grizzly
would stand around a minute if you yelled at him. Pa made up his mind he
would yell all right enough, if we came up to a grizzly.
Well, we didn't sleep much that night, 'cause Pa kept practicing on his
yell to scare a grizzly, for fear he would forget the words, and when
they called us in the morning Pa was the poorest imitation of a man
going out to test his bravery that I ever saw. While the Indians were
getting ready to go out to a canyon and turn the dogs loose to round up
a bear, Pa got a big knife and was sharpening it, so he could rip the
bear from Genesis to Revelations. After breakfast the chief and the
Carlisle Indian, and the big game hunter, and the cowman and I went out
about two miles, to the mouth of the canyon, where it was very narrow,
and they stationed Pa by a big rock, right where the bear would have to
pass; the rest of us got up on a bench of the canyon, where we could see
Pa be brave, and the young Indians went up about a mile, and started the
dogs. Well, Pa was a sight, as he stood there waiting for the bear, so
he could cuff its ears, and rip it open, right in sight of the chief,
and skin it; but he was nervous, and we could see that his legs trembled
when he heard the dogs bark up the canyon. I yelled to Pa to think of
Teddy Roosevelt, and Daniel Boone, and Buffalo Bill, and set his teeth
so they would not chatter and scare the bear, but Pa yelled back: “Never
you mind, I will kill my bear in my own way, but you can make up your
mind to have bear meat for supper.”
Pretty soon the big game hunter said: “There he comes, sure's you are
born,” and we looked up the canyon, and there was something coming, as
big as a load of hay, with bristles sticking up a foot high on its back,
and its mouth was open, and it was loping right towards pa. Gee, but I
was proud of pa, to see him sharpening his knife on his boot leg, but
when the great animal got within about a block of pa, the great father
seemed to have a streak of yellow, for he dropped his knife and yelled:
“Git, Ephraim,” in a loud voice, but Ephraim came right along, and
didn't git with any great suddenness. When the bear got within about
four doors of Pa, he saw the great father, and stood up on his hind
legs, and looked as big as a brewery horse, and he opened his mouth and
said: “Woof,” just like that. That was too much for my Pa, who began to
shuck his clothes, and then started on a run towards the mouth of the
canyon. The bear looked around as much as to say: “Well, what do you
think of that?” and we watched Pa sprinting toward the Indian camp like
a scared wolf.
[Illustration: The Grilly Looked as Big as a Brewery Horse.]
The big game hunter put a few bullets in the bear where they would do
the most good, and killed it, and we went down in the canyon and skinned
it, and took the meat and hide to camp, where we found Pa under a bed in
a squaw's tepee, making grand hailing signs of distress, and trying to
tell them about his killing a bear by letting it run after him, so it
would tire itself out and die of heart failure.
When we found Pa he had come out from under the bed, and was looking at
the hide of the bear to find the place where he hit it with the knife,
as he said he could see that the only chance for him to kill the bear
was to throw the knife at it from a distance, 'cause the bear was four
times as big as any bear he had ever killed. Pa took out a handful
of gold pieces and distributed them among the Indians, and told the
Carlisle Indian to explain to the tribe that the great father had killed
the bear by hypnotism, and they all believed it except the chief, who
seemed skeptical, for he said: “Great father heap brave man like a
sheep. Go play seven-up with squaws.” Poor Pa wasn't allowed to talk
with the men all day, 'cause the old chief said he was a squaw man. Pa
says they don't seem to realize that a man can be brave unless he allows
himself to be killed by a bear, but he says he will show them that a
great mind and a great head is better in the end than foolishness. Now
they want Pa to run a footrace with the young Indians, as the record he
made getting to camp ahead of the bear is better than any time ever made
on the reservation.