Once upon a time there was an Old Gentleman who lived in a Very
Comfortable Way; and some of his Neighbours said he was Rich and others
that, at any rate, he was Well Off, and others again that at least he
had Considerable Private Means. And when the Great War broke out it was
clear that he was much too Old to fight, and he wasn't able to speak at
Recruiting Meetings on account of an Impediment in his Speech, and he
had no Soldiers billeted upon him, because there were no Soldiers there,
and he could not take in Belgian Refugees because he lived on the East
Coast--so he just read the Papers and pottered about the Garden as he
used to do before.
But after a time it was noticed that he began to "draw in," as his
Neighbours said. First he gave up his Motor, and when his Gardener
enlisted he didn't get Another; and he never had a Fire in his Bedroom.
And his Neighbours, on thinking it over, concluded that he had been Hard
Hit by the War. But None of them knew how.
Then he began to travel Third Class and gave up Smoking Cigars. And they
thought he was waiting till the Stock Exchange opened.
Then they noticed that he got no new Clothes and his old ones were not
so smart as they used to be. And as the Stock Exchange was open by now
they began to believe that he must have become a Miser and was getting
meaner as he got older. And they all said it was a Pity. But he went on
reading the Papers and pottering round the Garden much as before.
And the Tradespeople found that the Books were not so big as they used
to be, and they began to say that it was a Pity when people who had
Money didn't know how to spend it.
But the Truth is that they were all wrong; he was a Collector. That was
how the Money went.
He never told anyone about his Collection, but he kept it in the Top
Drawer of his Desk till it got too big and overflowed into the Second
Drawer, and then into the Third, and so on.
He was quite determined that his Collection should be complete and
should contain Every Sound Specimen--that was partly why he kept reading
the Papers. But he didn't mind having Duplicates as long as they had
Different Dates. There was one Specimen of which he got a Duplicate
every Week.
One of his Rules was never to allow any Specimen into his Collection
unless it had a Stamp on it.
It was quite a New Sort of Collection. It was made up of Receipts from
the People who were running All The Different War Funds.
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