A drought is reported from India and Eastern Africa. Considering the amount
of water which has recently escaped from clouds over here it is not
surprising to find that they are feeling the pinch in other countries.
* * *
A correspondent writes to a weekly paper inquiring when Sir ERIC GEDDES was
born. We admire the fellow's restraint in not asking "Why?"
* * *
We understand that one wealthy connoisseur has decided to give up buying
Old Masters in order to save up for the purchase of a railway ticket.
* * *
_The Daily Mail_ points out that Lord NORTHCLIFFE has left England for the
Continent. Sir ERIC GEDDES is said to have remarked that he will catch his
lordship coming back.
* * *
A gentleman who is about to travel to a South Coast resort writes to
inquire what his position will be if some future Government reduces the
railway fares before he arrives at his destination.
* * *
In view of the increased railway fares there is some talk of starting a
Mansion House Fund to convey Scotsmen home from England before it is too
late.
* * *
Of the new railway rates it can be said that those who go farthest will
fare worse.
* * *
With reference to the man who was seen laughing in the Strand the other
day, it should be pointed out that he is not an English tax-payer but a
Colonial who was catching the boat home next morning.
* * *
A Christmas-card posted at Farnham in December, 1905, has just been
delivered at Ivychurch. The theory is that the postal authorities mistook
it for a business communication.
* * *
The monocle is coming into fashion once again, and it is thought that a
motorist wearing one goggle will soon be quite a common sight.
* * *
In view of their unwieldiness and size it is being urged that motor
charabancs should be required to carry a special form of hooter, to be
sounded only when there is no room for a vehicle coming in the other
direction to pass. A more elaborate system of signals is also suggested,
notably two short squawks and a long groan, to signify "My pedestrian, I
think."
* * *
According to a County Court judge it is the duty of every motorist who
knocks down a pedestrian to go back and ask the man if he is hurt. But
surely the victim cannot answer such a question off-hand without first
consulting his solicitor.
* * *
A great pilgrimage of house-hunters has visited the enormous marrow which
is growing in an allotment at Ingatestone, but the strong military guard
sent to protect it has succeeded up to the present in frustrating all
attempts to occupy it.
* * *
A motor fire-engine dashed into a draper's shop in the North of London last
Tuesday week. We understand that one of the firemen with great presence of
mind justified his action by immediately setting fire to the building.
* * *
A petrified fish about fifty feet long has been discovered in Utah. This is
said to be the largest sardine and the smallest whale America has ever
produced.
* * *
Building operations were interrupted in North London last week, when a
couple of sparrows built a nest on some foundations just where a bricklayer
was due to lay a brick the next day.
* * *
Six tourists motoring through the mountainous district of Ardèche
Department fell a thousand feet down a precipice, but escaped without
injury. We understand that in spite of many tempting offers from
cinematograph companies the motorists have decided not to repeat the
experiment.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _The Girl._ "ISN'T THAT MR. JONES BOWLING?"
_The Enthusiast._ "YES. THE OTHER DAY HE TOOK THREE WICKETS FOR SIX."
_The Girl._ "HOW DREADFUL! I'D NO IDEA HE DRANK."]
* * * * *