frequently pushed for money, I availed myself of a genteel appearance,
and pretty good address; and, taking advantage of the credulity of
several tradesmen in the neighbourhood, I ordered wearing apparel of
various kinds, and sometimes other goods, upon credit, without much
concern about the day of payment; however, I always took care to procure
a bill of parcels with the articles, which precluded any charge of
fraud, and left the matter, at the worst, but a debt contracted; for
which, being a minor, I knew I could not be arrested. This was my first
deviation from honesty since I left Liverpool. I was also frequently
obliged to change my lodgings; and, as payment of my rent would have
required ready money, for which I had so many other uses, I commonly
decamped under favour of the night, having previously removed my effects
by various stratagems. As I was ashamed to let my grandfather know the
true state of my affairs, and as I really grieved at the expenses I had
already caused him, which I knew had much inconvenienced him, I forbore
at last to trouble him for remittances; but falsely assured him that I
was doing well, and enabled to live upon the profits of my industry. I
desired he would abandon the idea of articling me to the law, as the
expenses attending admission had of late years been so much increased by
stamp duties; and as I could, if I continued the study, at a future
period, practise under the sanction of another person's name; a custom
then very prevalent, though irregular. By these assurances I quieted the
good old man, and silenced any inquiries my friends might have
instituted respecting me; as I now really wished to continue free from
all restraint upon my person or actions, and foolishly flattered myself
that I should, by some lucky event, ultimately secure the means of
independence. These conjectures were, however, perfectly vague, and
proceeding from no fixed idea whatever.
"On quitting my city employment, I returned to the law, for which I
still retained a partiality; and obtained a more liberal salary than
before in an office equally respectable. Indeed I was now become more
useful, and had improved much, both in person and address, since my
arrival in town.
"I was still frequently reduced to pecuniary straits, and obliged to
have recourse to various expedients, known only to men of the town, for
my support: some of them, indeed, were bordering on dishonesty, and none
of them very honourable. But to describe them individually is
impossible; and a man who lives by his wits, as the phrase is, will
assure you, if called to account, that he really could not for his life
tell by what distinct means he makes out a living.
"As I now wrote uncommonly fast, I quitted the station of a weekly
clerk, and obtained writings to copy by the sheet, from the
law-stationers, by which I could earn considerably more money; and in
this employment I continued to labour diligently for several hours every
day, and sometimes half the night.
"When I had a mind to relax from this occupation, and particularly if my
finances were at a low ebb, I frequently resorted to the Blue Lion, in
Gray's Inn Lane, a house noted for selling fine ale, and crowded every
night by a motley assemblage of visitors, among whom were many thieves,
sharpers, and other desperate characters, with their doxies. I was
introduced to this house (from which hundreds of young persons may date
their ruin) by a fellow-clerk, who appeared to have a personal intimacy
with most of these obnoxious persons; however, though I listened eagerly
to their conversation, (part of which was then unintelligible to me,)
and fancied them people of uncommon spirit, I was not yet sufficiently
depraved to cultivate their acquaintance; but sat with a pipe in my
mouth, enveloped in smoke, ruminating, like a philosopher, on the
various characters who tread the great stage of life, and felt a sort of
secret presentiment that I was myself born to undergo a more than common
share of vicissitudes and disappointments."
During his nightly resort to the Blue Lion he became acquainted with a
young man named D----, who had been steward on board a king's ship, but
who had spent all his money, and had now resolved to go to Portsmouth,
in the hope of procuring a situation similar to the one he had left.
Vaux, naturally inconstant, determined on accompanying him; and, having
converted most of their clothes into money, they set off on foot; but
had not proceeded farther than Kingston when their cash became
exhausted, and they owed a trifle to the mistress of the Eight Bells.
"In this dilemma," says Vaux, "a sudden thought struck me. Calling for
pen, ink, and paper, I told my companion I had a scheme in my head for
raising a supply, but would not impart it until I had tried its success.
I then drew up a sort of memorial to the following effect:--'To the
Ladies and Gentlemen of Kingston.--The writer hereof, a young man of
respectable family, and good education, having, by a series of
misfortunes, been reduced to the greatest distress, is now on his way to
Portsmouth, in hopes of procuring a situation in the navy; but, being
destitute of money for his present support, humbly solicits your
charitable assistance towards enabling him to pursue his journey. To a
noble mind, the pleasure of doing a good action is its own reward. The
smallest donation will be gratefully received, and any lady or gentleman
inclined to relieve the writer is earnestly requested to subscribe his
or her name hereto.'--Having completed this production, I desired my
friend to wait patiently for my return, and assured him I doubted not of
bringing speedy relief. I now set out on my expedition, and immediately
waited on Mr. Mayor, who was a grocer; but in this first essay I was
unsuccessful. His worship declared he never encouraged applications of
this sort from strangers; and desired me to go about my business. I,
however, took the liberty of subscribing his name to my memorial, by way
of sanction, and gave his charity credit for a donation of five
shillings. Young as I was at that time, I well knew that example, in
matters of this kind, goes a great way; and that many persons, without a
grain of Christian benevolence in their composition, will give liberally
from motives of ostentation, when they see that their neighbours have
already contributed, and that their own names and donations will also be
made public. I experienced the truth of this notion, for I was
successful in almost every application I afterwards made. Having visited
a number of genteel houses, with various success, I was on the point of
returning, to impart my good luck to my companion, when, coming to a
very handsome mansion-house in the suburbs of the town, I thought I
ought not to omit calling, and a person at that moment passing by, I
inquired whose residence it was, and which was the entrance to the
premises; for the house was situated in the midst of a spacious
pleasure-ground, remote from the high road, and, it being quite dusk, I
had not observed any avenue by which I could gain access to it. I was
informed that it was the residence of Lady W----; that a little further
on I should perceive a door in the brick wall, which extended along the
road-side; and that if I entered at that door, and proceeded in a
straight direction, I should arrive at the servants' hall; but my
informer cautioned me to keep close to another wall on my left hand,
which divided this avenue from the lawn in front of the mansion, because
there was a very large and fierce dog at the upper end, but which, being
chained up, could not reach me, if I followed the above directions. I
thanked this obliging person, and immediately proceeded to the door
described, which I entered, and walked cautiously, and not without some
fear, by the wall-side, till I perceived, by the lights in the kitchen
and out-offices, that I was near the premises.
"It was now very dark, and I was carefully exploring my way, my mind
full of apprehensions at the thought of this terrible dog; when lo! at
that instant, to my inexpressible consternation, the ferocious animal
made a spring at me, and I gave myself up for dead. However, though he
was certainly within a yard of me, he did me no mischief; but my alarm
was so great, that, without knowing how or where to fly for refuge, I
ran precipitately from the spot; and, when I recovered myself from the
fright, found myself in the pleasure-ground in front of the
mansion-house. It appeared that I had, without knowing, escaped through
a door in the wall, which was open on my left hand at the moment I was
alarmed by the dog. I was now more at a loss than ever, for I knew of no
way to get out of the pleasure-ground except by the aforesaid door, and
fear of the dog prevented my attempting that passage. After wandering
about for a few minutes, I approached the mansion, and, going up to one
of the parlour windows, which were very large, and on a level with the
terrace before the house, I applied my eye to the glass, and discovered,
through an aperture in the inside shutters, a numerous and splendid
party of ladies and gentlemen at dinner. Having considered a moment, I
determined on a very bold step, as I saw no alternative but remaining
all night in the open air, exposed to the inclemency of the weather.
Taking advantage of a pause in the company's conversation, I tapped with
my finger at the window, and immediately the whole party were struck
with wonder. In the midst of their surprise I repeated my knock; and
then, after several voices exclaiming 'Good God! there is certainly
somebody at the window,' &c. a gentleman rose from the table, and,
advancing towards me, opened first the shutters, and then the window
itself, which might, in fact, be called a pair of folding-doors; and
these being thrown back, I walked in with the most respectful air I
could assume, and presented myself to the astonished company. Having
bowed twice or thrice, and given time for their alarm to subside, I
began to make my speech.
"Apologizing for my presumptuous intrusion, I stated in a concise manner
the fright I had endured from the dog, my embarrassment at not being
able to find means of egress from the pleasure-ground, and my having
consequently taken the liberty of knocking at the window. I then
presented my memorial, which was read in turn by most of the company,
each of whom surveyed me with evident surprise. Having answered such
queries as they thought proper to put to me, I was desired by the lady
of the house to withdraw to the kitchen for a short time; and a servant
was ordered to attend me thither. Here I had my story to repeat for the
information of the domestics, who laughed heartily at the adventure of
the dog, but afterwards seriously assured me that, had the animal not
been chained, or had I approached within his reach, he would inevitably
have torn me to pieces. The parlour dinner being over, and the dishes
brought out, I was desired to fall to; and, being really hungry, I
wanted no pressing, but selected from the variety of good things on the
table a very fine buttock of beef, on which substantial fare I made a
sumptuous meal. There was no scarcity of good malt liquor, and Lady
W---- very kindly sent me out a pint of red port, with a particular
injunction (which, by-the-by, was unnecessary) that I should eat and
drink heartily.
"At length I was summoned to attend the company in the parlour; and her
ladyship then expressing her concern for my misfortunes, and her anxious
hope that I should speedily find an end to them, presented me with half
a guinea. The rest of the party also said many handsome things, and the
majority of them contributed to my relief. In addition to these favours,
one of the gentlemen at the particular request of Lady W----, took the
trouble to write a letter in my behalf to the captain of a man-of-war,
supposed to be then lying at Portsmouth, entreating him to give me an
appointment under him. Her ladyship, after obliging me to take another
glass of wine, and repeating her sorrow for my distress, advised me to
lose no time in prosecuting my journey, ordered a servant to conduct me
to the door at which I had first entered her premises, and I took a
respectful leave of this truly benevolent party.
"Returning to the Eight Bells, I imparted my adventures to my friend,
who was, of course, much pleased at my success; for I had realised
between four and five pounds. I found this begging scheme so productive,
that I was in no hurry to pursue the Portsmouth speculation; and, as we
were both satisfied with our present quarters, it was agreed that we
should continue a few days longer in Kingston, in which time I proposed
to follow up my success by making a regular circuit among the
inhabitants, and I, in fact, determined to levy similar contributions in
every town which lay in our route.
"It is to be observed that this idea of raising money was perfectly
original in me, for at that time I had never heard of such a practice,
but have since discovered that it is a very common expedient, and is
called by those persons who live by such impositions, 'the _Letter
Racket_.'
"The following day I again sallied forth and met with equal success,
visiting not only the houses of private persons, but even the
respectable shopkeepers, &c.; and I may here state, once for all, that
in the course of this as well as my subsequent speculations of the same
nature, I met with various receptions according to the charitable or
churlish dispositions of the people to whom I applied. Many pitied my
case and cheerfully relieved me. Others expressed equal commiseration,
but declined giving anything, either because 'they never encouraged
beggars,' or 'they had poor enough of their own to maintain.' Some
invited me into their parlours, treated me with excessive politeness,
and obliged me to take refreshment at their own tables; and where there
were any young ladies in the family, I was an object of particular
solicitude, and the recital of my misfortunes drew many a sigh from
their tender bosoms. Others desired me like the Mayor of Kingston to go
about my business, and hinted that I ought to be sent to the house of
correction as a vagrant. Sometimes the servants who admitted me refused
to present my memorial, declaring that they had strict orders from their
masters or mistresses never to trouble them on such an occasion. The
donations I commonly received were from one shilling to five; sometimes,
but rarely, I was presented with gold, particularly at the seats of the
nobility and gentry; all which lying within a short distance of the road
I travelled, I made a point of calling at; and for my information on
this subject, I provided myself with a comprehensive 'Book of Roads,' in
which those objects are correctly laid down. Some truly charitable
persons, but whose means were limited, relieved me with sixpence, and of
course I was bound to accept such a trifle with as much appearance of
thankfulness as I would a larger sum; and frequently when I called at a
farm-house by the road side, I have been compelled to take some cold
meat or other eatables, which I afterwards bestowed upon the first more
needy beggar I met on my way. It was my custom in general to travel on
foot, making short stages, and putting up at a good inn in every town I
entered, where I lived upon the best during my stay, and associated with
London riders, and other respectable guests. When tired of walking. I
availed myself of a passing stage-coach or return post-chaise; and my
only equipage was a spare shirt, handkerchief, &c. which, with my 'Book
of Roads,' I carried in a small bundle under my arm."
On the evening of the second day, however, he was arrested and carried
before the magistrates, charged as a rogue and vagabond. He referred the
magistrates to one of his grandfather's friends in London; and the
inquiries there satisfying them, he was discharged out of custody on the
second day of confinement, and hastened back to town, his companion
having proceeded to Portsmouth. After spending one dissipated evening in
London, he set out next day to Portsmouth; and, notwithstanding the
check he had received three days earlier, he stopped in Kingston, and
levied contributions, in the usual way, on the charitable inhabitants,
avoiding, of course, that part of the town where he had been before.
This practice he continued on the road, and after the payment of his
expenses he still had 15_l._ in his pocket. On his reaching Portsmouth,
his fervour for the navy cooled on his finding that his friend D---- had
procured a situation as a merchant's clerk, and he was, after some time,
induced to enter into the service of an attorney. A short employment was
quite sufficient to satisfy his industrious fit, and he soon quitted
Portsmouth in disgust, and proceeded once more towards the great
metropolis. There his good fortune threw before him an opportunity,
which steadiness on his part only required to render most advantageous.
Dining one day at the Saracen's Head, Snow Hill, he entered into
conversation with a gentleman named Kennedy, a surgeon in the navy, who,
pleased with his manner and address, procured for him an appointment as
midshipman on board the Astrea frigate. Delighted with the prospect of
at length entering the navy, he wrote to his grandfather, who
immediately furnished him with 100_l._ to purchase an outfit. On the
voyage he became weary of his position as a midshipman, and the captain
being in want of a clerk, he tendered his services and was accepted. At
the conclusion of a long cruise in the northern latitudes, the vessel
made for England; and on their arrival in the Thames, Vaux proceeded to
London. He there met with a dashing Cyprian, and unmindful of the
future, he remained with her until all his money was spent; and then he
found that his vessel had sailed, carrying with her his clothes, books,
and all the little property of which he was possessed. Now, driven to
the greatest distress, he had recourse to the gaming-table, where for a
short time he contrived, by associating with professed gamblers, to
procure a precarious existence. But the summer approaching and dupes
becoming fewer, he obtained by application to Messrs. Dalton and
Edwards, King's Bench Walk, a situation as clerk at one pound a week,
with Mr. Dalton, a solicitor, of Bury St. Edmund's. "Upon the whole,"
says he, "this was one of the most agreeable employments I ever engaged
in; and, had I prudently retained it for a few years, there is no doubt
I should have met with the most liberal encouragement from my employer.
But my natural inconstancy still prevailed; and I had been but a few
weeks at Bury, before I grew tired of the country, and thought of
nothing but returning to London, with such spoil as I could obtain from
the credulity of the tradesmen in the town. With this view I bespoke
clothes, boots, linen, and other articles at various shops, informing
the parties that I should expect credit till the expiration of my
quarter, to which, on account of the respectable gentleman I served,
they readily consented. As soon as any of these goods were brought home,
I immediately packed them up in small portable parcels, which I sent up
to London by the coach, consigned to a pawnbroker with whom I was on
intimate terms; desiring him to receive and keep them safe until he saw
me. I also coached off, in the same clandestine manner, such of my own
apparel, &c. as I had in my trunk, in which, to prevent discovery, I
deposited stones or bricks to preserve its gravity. By these means I had
nothing to impede my sudden departure, when rendered necessary by the
arrival of the expected quarter-day.
"I must here observe, to meet any surprise the reader might feel on the
subject, that, as I had never at this time been connected with downright
thieves, so I had never yet committed an actual theft, save the
embezzlement of money at Liverpool; (which indeed the law has lately
made a felonious taking;) though I therefore scrupled not at practising
a fraud, I was not yet sufficiently depraved to commit a robbery. This
will account for my not robbing the premises of Mr. Dalton, which, at a
subsequent period of my life, would have been my primary object, as I
had access to every part of the house, and have frequently viewed with
longing eyes the servant cleaning a handsome service of plate in the
pantry.
"I had now been about two months at Bury, and had no intention of
absconding till the expiration of the third; when an accidental event
induced me to hasten my departure. One afternoon Mr. Dalton had written
several letters in the office, and the footman being elsewhere engaged,
he requested me to drop them in the post-office in my way home. I
accordingly brought them out in my hand, and happening inadvertently to
cast my eye on the superscriptions, I perceived that one was addressed
to Mr. Lyne, tailor, Cecil Street, Strand, London. Being curious to know
what correspondence Mr. Dalton could have with a tailor, I opened this
letter, and found the contents to the following effect:--'Mr. Lyne,--By
the waggon which goes from hence on Monday next, and arrives at the Blue
Boar in Bishopsgate Street on Wednesday night, I shall send you a
portmanteau corded and sealed, but not locked, containing two coats,
sixteen waistcoats, fourteen pair of breeches, and a suit of uniform of
the City Light Horse. Most of these articles are nearly as good as new;
but, as they have now become unfashionable, I desire you will dispose of
them to the best advantage, on my account, and send me down by the same
conveyance two suits made in the present taste,' &c.
"It immediately struck me, that, if I took measures accordingly, I might
arrive in town time enough to intercept and obtain this trunk from the
inn; for which purpose I put this letter in my pocket, and the others in
the post-office. The next day, happening to go into Mr. Dalton's
kitchen, I there saw the portmanteau corded up, and directed; and, on
questioning the servant in a careless manner about it, he informed me
that he was going to carry it to the inn, the following evening, in
readiness for the departure of the waggon. The same afternoon it
happened (which was a most fortunate circumstance for me) that Mr.
Dalton again begged of me to put some letters in the post-office, which
he had not done above twice or thrice since I came into his service.
Looking at these letters, I saw, to my surprise, another addressed to
Mr. Lyne as before, which, eagerly opening, I found was to mention
something Mr. Dalton said he had forgot in his letter of the preceding
day. I immediately destroyed this second letter, which, had it come to
hand, might have frustrated my design.
"I now prepared matters for eloping, and sent off the remainder of my
effects by the coach, as before; but my good fortune produced another
windfall, of which I had no expectation. The day before my intended
departure, I was walking in the Market-place with a young man, who was
clerk to another attorney in the town; and, the conversation turning
upon watches, my companion observed that, if I wished to purchase one,
he would introduce me to a maker of his acquaintance, who would use me
well on his account. I took him at his word, and begged he would
immediately do so. We were then within a few doors of the shop, into
which we entered; and I perceived over the window in large characters,
'Lumley and Gudgeon, watchmakers.' I laughed inwardly at the singularity
of the latter name, which I considered ominous of my success in the
imposition I meant to put upon him. After a short preliminary
conversation, my acquaintance, having business to do, took his leave,
and Mr. Gudgeon himself proceeded to show me several watches. I informed
him that I wished to have a good one, but my circumstances would not
allow me to go to a high price. Mr. Gudgeon assured me it was better to
have a good one at once, and recommended me to a very handsome gilt
watch, capped and jewelled, and his own make, which he said he could
warrant to perform well, and for which he asked me eight guineas. I
replied that, as my weekly salary from Mr. Dalton was but one pound, I
could not afford to give so much, and began to examine others of a
cheaper kind, but still letting him see that I had a strong inclination
for the one he had recommended. This induced him to repeat his praises
of the latter, and to press me with greater energy to fix upon it. I at
length (with a show of much reluctance) suffered myself to be persuaded;
but I begged leave to observe, that as I was influenced in everything by
the advice of my good master, Mr. Dalton, I would not venture to make so
extensive a purchase without his approbation: that, if he would
therefore entrust me with the watch, I would consult Mr. Dalton, and
give him (Mr. Gudgeon) a decisive answer the next morning: this he
declared himself willing to do, on which I took both the watch and my
leave together, and returned home.