Lucian's True History is, as the author himself acknowledges in the
Preface to it, a collection of ingenious lies, calculated
principally to amuse the reader, not without several allusions, as
he informs us, to the works of ancient Poets, Historians, and
Philosophers, as well as, most probably, the performances of
contemporary writers, whose absurdities are either obliquely glanced
at, or openly ridiculed and exposed. We cannot but lament that the
humour of the greatest part of these allusions must be lost to us,
the works themselves being long since buried in oblivion. Lucian's
True History, therefore, like the Duke of Buckingham's Rehearsal,
cannot be half so agreeable as when it was first written; there is,
however, enough remaining to secure it from contempt. The vein of
rich fancy, and wildness of a luxuriant imagination, which run
through the whole, sufficiently point out the author as a man of
uncommon genius and invention. The reader will easily perceive that
Bergerac, Swift, and other writers have read this work of Lucian's,
and are much indebted to him for it.
PREFACE.
As athletics of all kinds hold it necessary, not only to prepare the
body by exercise and discipline, but sometimes to give it proper
relaxation, which they esteem no less requisite, so do I think it
highly necessary also for men of letters, after their severer
studies, to relax a little, that they may return to them with the
greater pleasure and alacrity; and for this purpose there is no
better repose than that which arises from the reading of such books
as not only by their humour and pleasantry may entertain them, but
convey at the same time some useful instruction, both which, I
flatter myself, the reader will meet with in the following history;
for he will not only be pleased with the novelty of the plan, and
the variety of lies, which I have told with an air of truth, but
with the tacit allusions so frequently made, not, I trust, without
some degree of humour, to our ancient poets, historians, and
philosophers, who have told us some most miraculous and incredible
stories, and which I should have pointed out to you, but that I
thought they would be sufficiently visible on the perusal.
Ctesias the Cnidian, son of Ctesiochus, wrote an account of India
and of things there, which he never saw himself, nor heard from
anybody else. Iambulus also has acquainted us with many wonders
which he met with in the great sea, and which everybody knew to be
absolute falsehoods: the work, however, was not unentertaining.
Besides these, many others have likewise presented us with their own
travels and peregrinations, where they tell us of wondrous large
beasts, savage men, and unheard-of ways of living. The great leader
and master of all this rhodomontade is Homer's "Ulysses," who talks
to Alcinous about the winds {75} pent up in bags, man-eaters, and
one-eyed Cyclops, wild men, creatures with many heads, several of
his companions turned into beasts by enchantment, and a thousand
things of this kind, which he related to the ignorant and credulous
Phaeacians.
These, notwithstanding, I cannot think much to blame for their
falsehoods, seeing that the custom has been sometimes authorised,
even by the pretenders to philosophy: I only wonder that they
should ever expect to be believed: being, however, myself incited,
by a ridiculous vanity, with the desire of transmitting something to
posterity, that I may not be the only man who doth not indulge
himself in the liberty of fiction, as I could not relate anything
true (for I know of nothing at present worthy to be recorded), I
turned my thoughts towards falsehood, a species of it, however, much
more excusable than that of others, as I shall at least say one
thing true, when I tell you that I lie, and shall hope to escape the
general censure, by acknowledging that I mean to speak not a word of
truth throughout. Know ye, therefore, that I am going to write
about what I never saw myself, nor experienced, nor so much as heard
from anybody else, and, what is more, of such things as neither are,
nor ever can be. I give my readers warning, therefore, not to
believe me.
* * * *
Once upon a time, {77} then, I set sail from the Pillars of
Hercules, and getting into the Western Ocean, set off with a
favourable wind; the cause of my peregrination was no more than a
certain impatience of mind and thirst after novelty, with a desire
of knowing where the sea ended, and what kind of men inhabited the
several shores of it; for this purpose I laid in a large stock of
provisions, and as much water as I thought necessary, taking along
with me fifty companions of the same mind as myself. I prepared
withal, a number of arms, with a skilful pilot, whom we hired at a
considerable expense, and made our ship (for it was a pinnace), as
tight as we could in case of a long and dangerous voyage.
We sailed on with a prosperous gale for a day and a night, but being
still in sight of land, did not make any great way; the next day,
however, at sun-rising, the wind springing up, the waves ran high,
it grew dark, and we could not unfurl a sail; we gave ourselves up
to the winds and waves, and were tossed about in a storm, which
raged with great fury for threescore and nineteen days, but on the
eightieth the sun shone bright, and we saw not far from us an
island, high and woody, with the sea round it quite calm and placid,
for the storm was over: we landed, got out, and happy to escape
from our troubles, laid ourselves down on the ground for some time,
after which we arose, and choosing out thirty of our company to take
care of the vessel, I remained on shore with the other twenty, in
order to take a view of the interior part of the island.
About three stadia from the sea, as we passed through a wood, we
found a pillar of brass, with a Greek inscription on it, the
characters almost effaced; we could make out however these words,
"thus far came Hercules and Bacchus:" near it were the marks of two
footsteps on a rock, one of them measured about an acre, the other
something less; the smaller one appeared to me to be that of
Bacchus, the larger that of Hercules; we paid our adorations to the
deities and proceeded. We had not got far before we met with a
river, which seemed exactly to resemble wine, particularly that of
Chios; {79} it was of a vast extent, and in many places navigable;
this circumstance induced us to give more credit to the inscription
on the pillar, when we perceived such visible marks of Bacchus's
presence here. As I had a mind to know whence this river sprung, I
went back to the place from which it seemed to arise, but could not
trace the spring; I found, however, several large vines full of
grapes, at the root of every one the wine flowed in great abundance,
and from them I suppose the river was collected. We saw a great
quantity of fish in it which were extremely like wine, both in taste
and colour, and after we had taken and eaten a good many of them we
found ourselves intoxicated; and when we cut them up, observed that
they were full of grape stones; it occurred to us afterwards that we
should have mixed them with some water fish, as by themselves they
tasted rather too strong of the wine.
We passed the river in a part of it which was fordable, and a little
farther on met with a most wonderful species of vine, the bottoms of
them that touched the earth were green and thick, and all the upper
part most beautiful women, with the limbs perfect from the waist,
only that from the tops of the fingers branches sprung out full of
grapes, just as Daphne is represented as turned into a tree when
Apollo laid hold on her; on the head, likewise, instead of hair they
had leaves and tendrils; when we came up to them they addressed us,
some in the Lydian tongue, some in the Indian, but most of them in
Greek; they would not suffer us to taste their grapes, but when
anybody attempted it, cried out as if they were hurt.
We left them and returned to our companions in the ship. We then
took our casks, filled some of them with water, and some with wine
from the river, slept one night on shore, and the next morning set
sail, the wind being very moderate. About noon, the island being
now out of sight, on a sudden a most violent whirlwind arose, and
carried the ship above three thousand stadia, lifting it up above
the water, from whence it did not let us down again into the seas
but kept us suspended {81a} in mid air, in this manner we hung for
seven days and nights, and on the eighth beheld a large tract of
land, like an island, {81b} round, shining, and remarkably full of
light; we got on shore, and found on examination that it was
cultivated and full of inhabitants, though we could not then see any
of them. As night came on other islands appeared, some large,
others small, and of a fiery colour; there was also below these
another land with seas, woods, mountains, and cities in it, and this
we took to be our native country: as we were advancing forwards, we
were seized on a sudden by the Hippogypi, {82a} for so it seems they
were called by the inhabitants; these Hippogypi are men carried upon
vultures, which they ride as we do horses. These vultures have each
three heads, and are immensely large; you may judge of their size
when I tell you that one of their feathers is bigger than the mast
of a ship. The Hippogypi have orders, it seems, to fly round the
kingdom, and if they find any stranger, to bring him to the king:
they took us therefore, and carried us before him. As soon as he
saw us, he guessed by our garb what we were. "You are Grecians,"
said he, "are you not?" We told him we were. "And how," added he,
"got ye hither through the air?" We told him everything that had
happened to us; and he, in return, related to us his own history,
and informed us, that he also was a man, that his name was Endymion,
{82b} that he had been taken away from our earth in his sleep, and
brought to this place where he reigned as sovereign. That spot,
{83a} he told us, which now looked like a moon to us, was the earth.
He desired us withal not to make ourselves uneasy, for that we
should soon have everything we wanted. "If I succeed," says he, "in
the war which I am now engaged in against the inhabitants of the
sun, you will be very happy here." We asked him then what enemies
he had, and what the quarrel was about? "Phaeton," he replied, "who
is king of the sun {83b} (for that is inhabited as well as the
moon), has been at war with us for some time past. The foundation
of it was this: I had formerly an intention of sending some of the
poorest of my subjects to establish a colony in Lucifer, which was
uninhabited: but Phaeton, out of envy, put a stop to it, by
opposing me in the mid-way with his Hippomyrmices; {84} we were
overcome and desisted, our forces at that time being unequal to
theirs. I have now, however, resolved to renew the war and fix my
colony; if you have a mind, you shall accompany us in the
expedition; I will furnish you everyone with a royal vulture and
other accoutrements; we shall set out to-morrow." "With all my
heart," said I, "whenever you please." We stayed, however, and
supped with him; and rising early the next day, proceeded with the
army, when the spies gave us notice that the enemy was approaching.
The army consisted of a hundred thousand, besides the scouts and
engineers, together with the auxiliaries, amongst whom were eighty
thousand Hippogypi, and twenty thousand who were mounted on the
Lachanopteri; {85a} these are very large birds, whose feathers are
of a kind of herb, and whose wings look like lettuces. Next to
these stood the Cinchroboli, {85b} and the Schorodomachi. {85c} Our
allies from the north were three thousand Psyllotoxotae {85d} and
five thousand Anemodromi; {85e} the former take their names from the
fleas which they ride upon, every flea being as big as twelve
elephants; the latter are foot-soldiers, and are carried about in
the air without wings, in this manner: they have large gowns
hanging down to their feet, these they tuck up and spread in a form
of a sail, and the wind drives them about like so many boats: in
the battle they generally wear targets. It was reported that
seventy thousand Strathobalani {86a} from the stars over Cappadocia
were to be there, together with five thousand Hippogerani; {86b}
these I did not see, for they never came: I shall not attempt,
therefore, to describe them; of these, however, most wonderful
things were related.
Such were the forces of Endymion; their arms were all alike; their
helmets were made of beans, for they have beans there of a
prodigious size and strength, and their scaly breast-plates of
lupines sewed together, for the skins of their lupines are like a
horn, and impenetrable; their shields and swords the same as our
own.
The army ranged themselves in this manner: the right wing was
formed by the Hippogypi, with the king, and round him his chosen
band to protect him, amongst which we were admitted; on the left
were the Lachanopteri; the auxiliaries in the middle, the foot were
in all about sixty thousand myriads. They have spiders, you must
know, in this country, in infinite numbers, and of pretty large
dimensions, each of them being as big as one of the islands of the
Cyclades; these were ordered to cover the air from the moon quite to
the morning star; this being immediately done, and the field of
battle prepared, the infantry was drawn up under the command of
Nycterion, the son of Eudianax.
The left wing of the enemy, which was commanded by Phaeton himself,
consisted of the Hippomyrmices; these are large birds, and resemble
our ants, except with regard to size, the largest of them covering
two acres; these fight with their horns and were in number about
fifty thousand. In the right wing were the Aeroconopes, {87a} about
five thousand, all archers, and riding upon large gnats. To these
succeeded the Aerocoraces, {87b} light infantry, but remarkably
brave and useful warriors, for they threw out of slings exceeding
large radishes, which whoever was struck by, died immediately, a
most horrid stench exhaling from the wound; they are said, indeed,
to dip their arrows in a poisonous kind of mallow. Behind these
stood ten thousand Caulomycetes, {88a} heavy-armed soldiers, who
fight hand to hand; so called because they use shields made of
mushrooms, and spears of the stalks of asparagus. Near them were
placed the Cynobalani, {88b} about five thousand, who were sent by
the inhabitants of Sirius; these were men with dog's heads, and
mounted upon winged acorns: some of their forces did not arrive in
time; amongst whom there were to have been some slingers from the
Milky-way, together with the Nephelocentauri; {88c} they indeed came
when the first battle was over, and I wish {88d} they had never come
at all: the slingers did not appear, which, they say, so enraged
Phaeton that he set their city on fire.
Thus prepared, the enemy began the attack: the signal being given,
and the asses braying on each side, for such are the trumpeters they
make use of on these occasions, the left wing of the Heliots, unable
to sustain the onset of our Hippogypi, soon gave way, and we pursued
them with great slaughter: their right wing, however, overcame our
left. The Aeroconopes falling upon us with astonishing force, and
advancing even to our infantry, by their assistance we recovered;
and they now began to retreat, when they found the left wing had
been beaten. The defeat then becoming general, many of them were
taken prisoners and many slain; the blood flowed in such abundance
that the clouds were tinged with it and looked red, just as they
appear to us at sunset; from thence it distilled through upon the
earth. Some such thing, I suppose, happened formerly amongst the
gods, which made Homer believe that Jove {89} rained blood at the
death of Sarpedon.
When we returned from our pursuit of the enemy we set up two
trophies; one, on account of the infantry engagement in the spider's
web, and another in the clouds, for our battle in the air. Thus
prosperously everything went on, when our spies informed us that the
Nephelocentaurs, who should have been with Phaeton before the
battle, were just arrived: they made, indeed, as they approached
towards us, a most formidable appearance, being half winged horses
and half men; the men from the waist upwards, about as big as the
Rhodian Colossus, and the horses of the size of a common ship of
burthen. I have not mentioned the number of them, which was really
so great, that it would appear incredible: they were commanded by
Sagittarius, {90a} from the Zodiac. As soon as they learned that
their friends had been defeated they sent a message to Phaeton to
call him back, whilst they put their forces into order of battle,
and immediately fell upon the Selenites, {90b} who were unprepared
to resist them, being all employed in the division of the spoil;
they soon put them to flight, pursued the king quite to his own
city, and slew the greatest part of his birds; they then tore down
the trophies, ran over all the field woven by the spiders, and
seized me and two of my companions. Phaeton at length coming up,
they raised other trophies for themselves; as for us, we were
carried that very day to the palace of the Sun, our hands bound
behind us by a cord of the spider's web.
The conquerors determined not to besiege the city of the Moon, but
when they returned home, resolved to build a wall between them and
the Sun, that his rays might not shine upon it; this wall was double
and made of thick clouds, so that the moon was always eclipsed, and
in perpetual darkness. Endymion, sorely distressed at these
calamities, sent an embassy, humbly beseeching them to pull down the
wall, and not to leave him in utter darkness, promising to pay them
tribute, to assist them with his forces, and never more to rebel; he
sent hostages withal. Phaeton called two councils on the affair, at
the first of which they were all inexorable, but at the second
changed their opinion; a treaty at length was agreed to on these
conditions:--
The Heliots {92} and their allies on one part, make the following
agreement with the Selenites and their allies on the other:--"That
the Heliots shall demolish the wall now erected between them, that
they shall make no irruptions into the territories of the Moon; and
restore the prisoners according to certain articles of ransom to be
stipulated concerning them; that the Selenites shall permit all the
other stars to enjoy their rights and privileges; that they shall
never wage war with the Heliots, but assist them whenever they shall
be invaded; that the king of the Selenites shall pay to the king of
the Heliots an annual tribute of ten thousand casks of dew, for the
insurance of which, he shall send ten thousand hostages; that they
shall mutually send out a colony to the Morning-star, in which,
whoever of either nation shall think proper, may become a member;
that the treaty shall be inscribed on a column of amber, in the
midst of the air, and on the borders of the two kingdoms. This
treaty was sworn to on the part of the Heliots, by Pyronides, {93}
and Therites, and Phlogius; and on the part of the Selenites, by
Nyctor, and Menarus, and Polylampus."
Such was the peace made between them; the wall was immediately
pulled down, and we were set at liberty. When we returned to the
Moon, our companions met and embraced us, shedding tears of joy, as
did Endymion also. He intreated us to remain there, or to go along
with the new colony; this I could by no means be persuaded to, but
begged he would let us down into the sea. As he found I could not
be prevailed on to stay, after feasting us most nobly for seven
days, he dismissed us.
I will now tell you every thing which I met with in the Moon that
was new and extraordinary. Amongst them, when a man grows old he
does not die, but dissolves into smoke and turns to air. They all
eat the same food, which is frogs roasted on the ashes from a large
fire; of these they have plenty which fly about in the air, they get
together over the coals, snuff up the scent of them, and this serves
them for victuals. Their drink is air squeezed into a cup, which
produces a kind of dew.
He who is quite bald is esteemed a beauty amongst them, for they
abominate long hair; whereas, in the comets, it is looked upon as a
perfection at least; so we heard from some strangers who were
speaking of them; they have, notwithstanding, small beards a little
above the knee; no nails to their feet, and only one great toe.
They have honey here which is extremely sharp, and when they
exercise themselves, wash their bodies with milk; this, mixed with a
little of their honey, makes excellent cheese. {94} Their oil is
extracted from onions, is very rich, and smells like ointment.
Their wines, which are in great abundance, yield water, and the
grape stones are like hail; I imagine, indeed, that whenever the
wind shakes their vines and bursts the grape, then comes down
amongst us what we call hail. They make use of their belly, which
they can open and shut as they please, as a kind of bag, or pouch,
to put anything in they want; it has no liver or intestines, but is
hairy and warm within, insomuch, that new-born children, when they
are cold, frequently creep into it. The garments of the rich
amongst them are made of glass, but very soft: the poor have woven
brass, which they have here in great abundance, and by pouring a
little water over it, so manage as to card it like wool. I am
afraid to mention their eyes, lest, from the incredibility of the
thing, you should not believe me. I must, however, inform you that
they have eyes which they take in and out whenever they please: so
that they can preserve them anywhere till occasion serves, and then
make use of them; many who have lost their own, borrow from others;
and there are several rich men who keep a stock of eyes by them.
Their ears are made of the leaves of plane-trees, except of those
who spring, as I observed to you, from acorns, these alone have
wooden ones. I saw likewise another very extraordinary thing in the
king's palace, which was a looking-glass that is placed in a well
not very deep; whoever goes down into the well hears everything that
is said upon earth, and if he looks into the glass, beholds all the
cities and nations of the world as plain as if he was close to them.
I myself saw several of my friends there, and my whole native
country; whether they saw me also I will not pretend to affirm. He
who does not believe these things, whenever he goes there will know
that I have said nothing but what is true.
To return to our voyage. We took our leave of the king and his
friends, got on board our ship, and set sail. Endymion made me a
present of two glass robes, two brass ones, and a whole coat of
armour made of lupines, all which I left in the whale's belly. {96}
He likewise sent with us a thousand Hippogypi, who escorted us five
hundred stadia.
We sailed by several places, and at length reached the new colony of
the Morning-star, where we landed and took in water; from thence we
steered into the Zodiac; leaving the Sun on our left, we passed
close by his territory, and would have gone ashore, many of our
companions being very desirous of it, but the wind would not permit
us; we had a view, however, of that region, and perceived that it
was green, fertile, and well-watered, and abounding in everything
necessary and agreeable. The Nephelocentaurs, who are mercenaries
in the service of Phaeton, saw us and flew aboard our ship, but,
recollecting that we were included into the treaty, soon departed;
the Hippogypi likewise took their leave of us.
All the next night and day we continued our course downwards, and
towards evening came upon Lycnopolis: {97} this city lies between
the Pleiades and the Hyades, and a little below the Zodiac: we
landed, but saw no men, only a number of lamps running to and fro in
the market-place and round the port: some little ones, the poor, I
suppose, of the place; others the rich and great among them, very
large, light, and splendid: every one had its habitation or
candlestick to itself, and its own proper name, as men have. We
heard them speak: they offered us no injury, but invited us in the
most hospitable manner; we were afraid, notwithstanding: neither
would any of us venture to take any food or sleep. The king's court
is in the middle of the city; here he sits all night, calls every
one by name, and if they do not appear, condemns them to death for
deserting their post; their death is, to be put out; we stood by and
heard several of them plead their excuses for non-attendance. Here
I found my own lamp, talked to him, and asked him how things went on
at home; he told me everything that had happened. We stayed there
one night, and next day loosing our anchor, sailed off very near the
clouds; where we saw, and greatly admired the city of Nephelo-
coccygia, {98a} but the wind would not permit us to land. Coronus,
the son of Cottiphion, is king there. I remember Aristophanes,
{98b} the poet, speaks of him, a man of wisdom and veracity, the
truth of whose writings nobody can call in question. About three
days after this, we saw the ocean very plainly, but no land, except
those regions which hang in the air, and which appeared to us all
bright and fiery. The fourth day about noon, the wind subsiding, we
got safe down into the sea. No sooner did we touch the water, but
we were beyond measure rejoiced. We immediately gave every man his
supper, as much as we could afford, and afterwards jumped into the
sea and swam, for it was quite calm and serene.
It often happens, that prosperity is the forerunner of the greatest
misfortunes. We had sailed but two days in the sea, when early in
the morning of the third, at sun-rise, we beheld on a sudden several
whales, and one amongst them, of a most enormous size, being not
less than fifteen hundred stadia in length, he came up to us with
his mouth wide open, disturbing the sea for a long way before him,
the waves dashing round on every side; he whetted his teeth, which
looked like so many long spears, and were white as ivory; we
embraced and took leave of one another, expecting him every moment;
he came near, and swallowed us up at once, ship and all; he did not,
however, crush us with his teeth, for the vessel luckily slipped
through one of the interstices; when we were got in, for some time
it was dark, and we could see nothing; but the whale happening to
gape, we beheld a large space big enough to hold a city with ten
thousand men in it; in the middle were a great number of small fish,
several animals cut in pieces, sails and anchors of ships, men's
bones, and all kinds of merchandise; there was likewise a good
quantity of land and hills, which seemed to have been formed of the
mud which he had swallowed; there was also a wood, with all sorts of
trees in it, herbs of every kind; everything, in short, seemed to
vegetate; the extent of this might be about two hundred and forty
stadia. We saw also several sea-birds, gulls, and kingfishers,
making their nests in the branches. At our first arrival in these
regions, we could not help shedding tears; in a little time,
however, I roused my companions, and we repaired our vessel; after
which, we sat down to supper on what the place afforded. Fish of
all kinds we had here in plenty, and the remainder of the water
which we brought with us from the Morning-star. When we got up the
next day, as often as the whale gaped, we could see mountains and
islands, sometimes only the sky, and plainly perceived by our motion
that he travelled through the sea at a great rate, and seemed to
visit every part of it. At length, when our abode become familiar
to us, I took with me seven of my companions, and advanced into the
wood in order to see everything I could possibly; we had not gone
above five stadia, before we met with a temple dedicated to Neptune,
as we learned by the inscription on it, and a little farther on,
several sepulchres, monumental stones, and a fountain of clear
water; we heard the barking of a dog, and seeing smoke at some
distance from us, concluded there must be some habitation not far
off; we got on as fast as we could, and saw an old man and a boy
very busy in cultivating a little garden, and watering it from a
fountain; we were both pleased and terrified at the sight, and they,
as you may suppose, on their part not less affected, stood fixed in
astonishment and could not speak: after some time, however, "Who
are you?" said the old man; "and whence come ye? are you daemons of
the sea, or unfortunate men, like ourselves? for such we are, born
and bred on land, though now inhabitants of another element;
swimming along with this great creature, who carries us about with
him, not knowing what is to become of us, or whether we are alive or
dead." To which I replied, "We, father, are men as you are, and but
just arrived here, being swallowed up, together with our ship, but
three days ago; we came this way to see what the wood produced, for
it seemed large and full of trees; some good genius led us towards
you, and we have the happiness to find we are not the only poor
creatures shut up in this great monster; but give us an account of
your adventures, let us know who you are, and how you came here."
He would not however, tell us anything himself, or ask us any
questions, till he had performed the rites of hospitality; he took
us into his house, therefore, where he had got beds, and made
everything very commodious; here he presented us with herbs, fruit,
fish, and wine: and when we were satisfied, began to inquire into
our history; when I acquainted him with everything that had happened
to us; the storm we met with; our adventures in the island; our
sailing through the air, the war, etc., from our first setting out,
even to our descent into the whale's belly.
He expressed his astonishment at what had befallen us, and then told
us his own story, which was as follows:--"Strangers," said he, "I am
a Cyprian by birth, and left my country to merchandise with this
youth, who is my son, and several servants. We sailed to Italy with
goods of various kinds, some of which you may, perhaps, have seen in
the mouth of the whale; we came as far as Sicily with a prosperous
gale, when a violent tempest arose, and we were tossed about in the
ocean for three days, where we were swallowed up, men, ship and all,
by the whale, only we two remaining alive; after burying our
companions we built a temple to Neptune, and here we have lived ever
since, cultivating our little garden, raising herbs, and eating fish
or fruit. The wood, as you see, is very large, and produces many
vines, from which we have excellent wine; there is likewise a
fountain, which perhaps you have observed, of fresh and very cold
water. We make our bed of leaves, have fuel sufficient, and catch a
great many birds and live fish. Getting out upon the gills of the
whale, there we wash ourselves when we please. There is a salt
lake, about twenty stadia round, which produces fish of all kinds,
and where we row about in a little boat which we built on purpose.
It is now seven-and-twenty years since we were swallowed up.
Everything here, indeed, is very tolerable, except our neighbours,
who are disagreeable, troublesome, savage, and unsociable." "And
are there more," replied I, "besides ourselves in the whale?" "A
great many," said he, "and those very unhospitable, and of a most
horrible appearance: towards the tail, on the western parts of the
wood, live the Tarichanes, {104a} a people with eel's eyes, and
faces like crabs, bold, warlike, and that live upon raw flesh. On
the other side, at the right hand wall, are the Tritonomendetes,
{104b} in their upper parts men, and in the lower resembling
weasels. On the left are the Carcinochires, {104c} and the
Thynnocephali, {104d} who have entered into a league offensive and
defensive with each other. The middle part is occupied by the
Paguradae, {105a} and the Psittopodes, {105b} a warlike nation, and
remarkably swift-footed. The eastern parts, near the whale's mouth,
being washed by the sea, are most of them uninhabited. I have some
of these, however, on condition of paying an annual tribute to the
Psittopodes of five hundred oysters. Such is the situation of this
country; our difficulty is how to oppose so many people, and find
sustenance for ourselves." "How many may there be?" said I. "More
than a thousand," said he. "And what are their arms?" "Nothing,"
replied he, "but fish-bones." "Then," said I, "we had best go to
war with them, for we have arms and they none; if we conquer them we
shall live without fear for the future." This was immediately
agreed upon, and, as soon as we returned to our ship, we began to
prepare. The cause of the war was to be the non-payment of the
tribute, which was just now becoming due: they sent to demand it;
he returned a contemptuous answer to the messengers: the
Psittopodes and Paguradae were both highly enraged, and immediately
fell upon Scintharus (for that was the old man's name), in a most
violent manner.
We, expecting to be attacked, sent out a detachment of five-and-
twenty men, with orders to lie concealed till the enemy was past,
and then to rise upon them, which they did, and cut off their rear.
We, in the meantime, being likewise five-and-twenty in number, with
the old man and his son, waited their coming up, met, and engaged
them with no little danger, till at length they fled, and we pursued
them even into their trenches. Of the enemy there fell an hundred
and twenty; we lost only one, our pilot, who was run through by the
rib of a mullet. That day, and the night after it, we remained on
the field of battle, and erected the dried backbone of a dolphin as
a trophy. Next day some other forces, who had heard of the
engagement, arrived, and made head against us; the Tarichanes; under
the command of Pelamus, in the right wing, the Thynnocephali on the
left, and the Carcinochires in the middle; the Tritonomendetes
remained neutral, not choosing to assist either party: we came
round upon all the rest by the temple of Neptune, and with a hideous
cry, rushed upon them. As they were unarmed, we soon put them to
flight, pursued them into the wood, and took possession of their
territory. They sent ambassadors a little while after to take away
their dead, and propose terms of peace; but we would hear of no
treaty, and attacking them the next day, obtained a complete
victory, and cut them all off, except the Tritonomendetes, who,
informed of what had passed, ran away up to the whale's gills, and
from thence threw themselves into the sea. The country being now
cleared of all enemies, we rambled through it, and from that time
remained without fear, used what exercise we pleased, went a-
hunting, pruned our vines, gathered our fruit, and lived, in short,
in every respect like men put together in a large prison, which
there was no escaping from, but where they enjoy everything they can
wish for in ease and freedom; such was our way of life for a year
and eight months.
On the fifteenth day of the ninth month, about the second opening of
the whale's mouth (for this he did once every hour, and by that we
calculated our time), we were surprised by a sudden noise, like the
clash of oars; being greatly alarmed, we crept up into the whale's
mouth, where, standing between his teeth, we beheld one of the most
astonishing spectacles that was ever seen; men of an immense size,
each of them not less than half a stadium in length, sailing on
islands like boats. I know what I am saying is incredible, I shall
proceed, notwithstanding: these islands were long, but not very
high, and about a hundred stadia in circumference; there were about
eight-and-twenty of these men in each of them, besides the rowers on
the sides, who rowed with large cypresses, with their branches and
leaves on; in the stern stood a pilot raised on an eminence and
guiding a brazen helm; on the forecastle were forty immense
creatures resembling men, except in their hair, which was all a
flame of fire, so that they had no occasion for helmets; these were
armed, and fought most furiously; the wind rushing in upon the wood,
which was in every one of them, swelled it like a sail and drove
them on, according to the pilot's direction; and thus, like so many
long ships, the islands, by the assistance of the oars, also moved
with great velocity. At first we saw only two or three, but
afterwards there appeared above six hundred of them, which
immediately engaged; many were knocked to pieces by running against
each other, and many sunk; others were wedged in close together and,
not able to get asunder, fought desperately; those who were near the
prows showed the greatest alacrity, boarding each other's ships, and
making terrible havoc; none, however, were taken prisoners. For
grappling-irons they made use of large sharks chained together, who
laid hold of the wood and kept the island from moving: they threw
oysters at one another, one of which would have filled a waggon, and
sponges of an acre long. AEolocentaurus was admiral of one of the
fleets, and Thalassopotes {109} of the other: they had quarrelled,
it seems, about some booty; Thalassopotes, as it was reported,
having driven away a large tribe of dolphins belonging to
AEolocentaurus: this we picked up from their own discourse, when we
heard them mention the names of their commanders. At length the
forces of AEolocentaurus prevailed, and sunk about a hundred and
fifty of the islands of the enemy, and taking three more with the
men in them: the rest took to their oars and fled. The conquerors
pursued them a little way, and in the evening returned to the wreck,
seizing the remainder of the enemy's vessels, and getting back some
of their own, for they had themselves lost no less than fourscore
islands in the engagement. They erected a trophy for this victory,
hanging one of the conquered islands on the head of the whale, which
they fastened their hawsers to, and casting anchor close to him, for
they had anchors immensely large and strong, spent the night there:
in the morning, after they had returned thanks, and sacrificed on
the back of the whale, they buried their dead, sung their Io Paeans,
and sailed off. Such was the battle of the islands.