CXXVII. LETTERS, TALES, AND PLANS

The reader has not failed to remark the great number of letters

which Samuel Clemens wrote to his friend William Dean Howells; yet

comparatively few can even be mentioned. He was always writing to

Howells, on every subject under the sun; whatever came into his

mind--business, literature, personal affairs--he must write about it

to Howells. Once, when nothing better occurred, he sent him a series of

telegrams, each a stanza from an old hymn, possibly thinking they might

carry comfort.--[“Clemens had then and for many years the habit of

writing to me about what he was doing, and still more of what he was

experiencing. Nothing struck his imagination, in or out of the daily

routine, but he wished to write me of it, and he wrote with the greatest

fullness and a lavish dramatization, sometimes to the length of twenty

or forty pages:” (My Mark Twain, by W. D. Howells.)] Whatever of

picturesque happened in the household he immediately set it down for

Howells's entertainment. Some of these domestic incidents carry the

flavor of his best humor. Once he wrote:

Last night, when I went to bed, Mrs. Clemens said, “George didn't

take the cat down to the cellar; Rosa says he has left it shut up in

the conservatory.” So I went down to attend to Abner (the cat).

About three in the morning Mrs. C. woke me and said, “I do believe

I hear that cat in the drawing-room. What did you do with him?” I

answered with the confidence of a man who has managed to do the

right thing for once, and said, “I opened the conservatory doors,

took the library off the alarm, and spread everything open, so that

there wasn't any obstruction between him and the cellar.” Language

wasn't capable of conveying this woman's disgust. But the sense of

what she said was, “He couldn't have done any harm in the

conservatory; so you must go and make the entire house free to him

and the burglars, imagining that he will prefer the coal-bins to the

drawing-room. If you had had Mr. Howells to help you I should have

admired, but not have been astonished, because I should know that

together you would be equal to it; but how you managed to contrive

such a stately blunder all by yourself is what I cannot understand.”

So, you see, even she knows how to appreciate our gifts....

I knocked off during these stirring hours, and don't intend to go to

work again till we go away for the summer, four or six weeks hence.

So I am writing to you, not because I have anything to say, but

because you don't have to answer and I need something to do this

afternoon.

The rightful earl has----

Friday, 7th.

Well, never mind about the rightful earl; he merely wanted to-borrow

money. I never knew an American earl that didn't.

After a trip to Boston, during which Mrs. Clemens did some bric-a-brac

shopping, he wrote:

Mrs. Clemens has two imperishable topics now: the museum of andirons

which she collected and your dinner. It is hard to tell which she

admires the most. Sometimes she leans one way and sometimes the

other; but I lean pretty steadily toward the dinner because I can

appreciate that, whereas I am no prophet in andirons. There has

been a procession of Adams Express wagons filing before the door all

day delivering andirons.

In a more serious vein he refers to the aged violinist Ole Bull and his

wife, whom they had met during their visit, and their enjoyment of that

gentle-hearted pair.

Clemens did some shorter work that spring, most of which found its

way into the Atlantic. “Edward Mills and George Benton,” one of the

contributions of this time, is a moral sermon in its presentation of a

pitiful human spectacle and misdirected human zeal.

It brought a pack of letters of approval, not only from laity, but

the church, and in some measure may have helped to destroy the silly

sentimentalism which manifested itself in making heroes of spectacular

criminals. That fashion has gone out, largely. Mark Twain wrote

frequently on the subject, though never more effectively than in this

particular instance. “Mrs. McWilliams and the Lightning” was another

Atlantic story, a companion piece to “Mrs. McWilliams's Experience with

the Membranous Croup,” and in the same delightful vein--a vein in which

Mark Twain was likely to be at his best--the transcription of a scene

not so far removed in character from that in the “cat” letter just

quoted: something which may or may not have happened, but might have

happened, approximately as set down. Rose Terry Cooke wrote:

Horrid man, how did you know the way I behave in a thunderstorm?

Have you been secreted in the closet or lurking on the shed roof?

I hope you got thoroughly rained on; and worst of all is that you

made me laugh at myself; my real terrors turned round and grimaced

at me: they were sublime, and you have made them ridiculous just

come out here another year and have four houses within a few rods of

you struck and then see if you write an article of such exasperating

levity. I really hate you, but you are funny.

In addition to his own work, he conceived a plan for Orion. Clemens

himself had been attempting, from time to time, an absolutely faithful

autobiography; a document in which his deeds and misdeeds, even his

moods and inmost thoughts, should be truly set down. He had found it an

impossible task. He confessed freely that he lacked the courage, even

the actual ability, to pen the words that would lay his soul bare, but

he believed Orion equal to the task. He knew how rigidly honest he was,

how ready to confess his shortcomings, how eager to be employed at some

literary occupation. It was Mark Twain's belief that if Orion would

record in detail his long, weary struggle, his succession of attempts

and failures, his past dreams and disappointments, along with his sins

of omission and commission, it would make one of those priceless human

documents such as have been left by Benvenuto Cellini, Cazenova, and

Rousseau.

“Simply tell your story to yourself,” he wrote, “laying all hideousness

utterly bare, reserving nothing. Banish the idea of the audience and all

hampering things.”

Orion, out in Keokuk, had long since abandoned the chicken farm and

a variety of other enterprises. He had prospected insurance, mining,

journalism, his old trade of printing, and had taken down and hung up

his law shingle between each of these seizures. Aside from business,

too, he had been having a rather spectacular experience. He had changed

his politics three times (twice in one day), and his religion as many

more. Once when he was delivering a political harangue in the street,

at night, a parade of the opposition (he had but just abandoned them)

marched by carrying certain flaming transparencies, which he himself

had made for them the day before. Finally, after delivering a series of

infidel lectures; he had been excommunicated and condemned to eternal

flames by the Presbyterian Church. He was therefore ripe for any new

diversion, and the Autobiography appealed to him. He set about it with

splendid enthusiasm, wrote a hundred pages or so of his childhood with

a startling minutia of detail and frankness, and mailed them to his

brother for inspection.

They were all that Mark Twain had expected; more than he had expected.

He forwarded them to Howells with great satisfaction, suggesting, with

certain excisions, they be offered anonymously to the Atlantic readers.

But Howells's taste for realism had its limitations. He found the story

interesting--indeed, torturingly, heart-wringingly so--and, advising

strongly against its publication, returned it.

Onion was steaming along at the rate of ten to twenty pages a day now,

forwarding them as fast as written, while his courage was good and the

fires warm. Clemens, receiving a package by every morning mail, soon

lost interest, then developed a hunted feeling, becoming finally

desperate. He wrote wildly to shut Orion off, urging him to let his

manuscript accumulate, and to send it in one large consignment at the

end. This Orion did, and it is fair to say that in this instance at

least he stuck to his work faithfully to the bitter, disheartening end.

And it would have been all that Mark Twain had dreamed it would be, had

Orion maintained the simple narrative spirit of its early pages. But

he drifted off into theological byways; into discussions of his

excommunication and infidelities, which were frank enough, but lacked

human interest.

In old age Mark Twain once referred to Orion's autobiography in print

and his own disappointment in it, which he attributed to Orion's having

departed from the idea of frank and unrestricted confession to exalt

himself as a hero-a statement altogether unwarranted, and due to one of

those curious confusions of memory and imagination that more than once

resulted in a complete reversal of the facts. A quantity of Orion's

manuscript has been lost and destroyed, but enough fragments of it

remain to show its fidelity to the original plan. It is just one long

record of fleeting hope, futile effort, and humiliation. It is the story

of a life of disappointment; of a man who has been defeated and beaten

down and crushed by the world until he has nothing but confession left

to surrender.--[Howells, in his letter concerning the opening chapters,

said that they would some day make good material. Fortunately the

earliest of these chapters were preserved, and, as the reader may

remember, furnished much of the childhood details for this biography.]

Whatever may have been Mark Twain's later impression of his brother's

manuscript, its story of failure and disappointment moved him to

definite action at the time.

Several years before, in Hartford, Orion had urged him to make his

publishing contracts on a basis of half profits, instead of on the

royalty plan. Clemens, remembering this, had insisted on such an

arrangement for the publication of 'A Tramp Abroad', and when his first

statement came in he realized that the new contract was very largely to

his advantage. He remembered Orion's anxiety in the matter, and made it

now a valid excuse for placing his brother on a firm financial footing.

Out of the suspicions which you bred in me years ago has grown this

result, to wit: that I shall within the twelve months get $40,000 out of

this Tramp, instead of $20,000. $20,000, after taxes and other expenses

are stripped away, is worth to the investor about $75 a month, so I

shall tell Mr. Perkins [his lawyer and financial agent] to make your

check that amount per month hereafter.... This ends the loan business,

and hereafter you can reflect that you are living not on borrowed money,

but on money which you have squarely earned, and which has no taint or

savor of charity about it, and you can also reflect that the money which

you have been receiving of me is charged against the heavy bill which

the next publisher will have to stand who gets a book of mine.

From that time forward Orion Clemens was worth substantially twenty

thousand dollars--till the day of his death, and, after him, his widow.

Far better was it for him that the endowment be conferred in the form of

an income, than had the capital amount been placed in his hands.

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