ST. ANDREWS, _Feb. 13, 1640_.
CCXCVI.--_To the much honoured_ PETER STIRLING.
[He may have been related to James Stirling, minister of Paisley,
who, along with Sir J. Stuart of Goodtrees, wrote "Naphtali;" or
to John Stirling, minister of Edinburgh, one who suffered much,
and is referred to in the notice to Letter XCI.]
(_BELIEVERS' GRACES ALL FROM CHRIST--ASPIRATION AFTER MORE LOVE TO
HIM--HIS REIGN DESIRED._)
MUCH HONOURED AND WORTHY SIR,--I received yours, and cannot but be
ashamed that mistaken love hath brought me into court[425] and account
in the heart of God's children, especially of another nation. I should
not make a lie of the grace of God, if I should think I have little
share of it myself. Oh, how much better were it for me to stand in the
counting-table of many for a halfpenny, and to be esteemed a _liker_,
rather than a _lover_ of Christ! If I were weighed, vanity would bear
down the scale, as having weight in the balance above me, except my
lovely Saviour should cast in beside me some of His borrowed worth.
And oh if I were writing now sincerely in this extenuation, which may
be (and I fear is) subtle and cozening pride! I would I could love
something of heaven's worth, in you and all of your metal. Oh how
happy were I, if I could regain and conquer back from the creature my
sold and lost love, that I might lay it upon heaven's Jewel, that
ever, ever blooming Flower of the highest garden, even my
soul-redeeming and never-enough prized Lord Jesus! Oh that He would
wash my love, and put it on the Mediator's wheel, and refine it from
its dross and tin, that I might propine and gift that Lord, so
love-worthy, with all my love! Oh, if I could set a lease of thousands
of years, and a suspension of my part of heaven's glory, and frist,
till a long day, my desired salvation, so being that I could, in this
lower kitchen and undervault of His creation, be feasted with His
love, and that I might be a footstool to His glory before men and
angels! Oh, if He would let out heaven's fountain upon withered me,
dry and sapless me! If I were but sick of love for His love. And oh,
how would that sickness delight me! How sweet should that easing and
refreshing pain be to my soul!
[425] Favour.
I shall be glad to be a witness, to behold the kingdoms of the world
become Christ's. I could stay out of heaven many years to see that
victorious triumphing Lord act that prophesied part of His
soul-conquering love, in taking into His kingdom the greater sister,
that kirk of the Jews, who sometime courted our Well-beloved for her
little sister (Cant. viii. 8); to behold Him set up as an ensign and
banner of love, to the ends of the world. And truly we are to believe
that His wrath is ripe for the land of graven images, and for the
falling of that millstone into the midst of the sea. Grace be with
you.
Yours, in his sweet Lord Jesus,