ABERDEEN, _March 7, 1637_.
CXII.--_To_ MR. JOHN FERGUSHILL.
[MR. JOHN FERGUSHILL'S mother was Janet Kennedy, sister or near
relative to Hugh Kennedy of Ayr. He was at this time minister of
Ochiltree, a parish in the centre of Ayrshire, in the district of
Kyle. When Mr. Robert Blair was translated from Ayr to St.
Andrews by the General Assembly, 1639, Fergushill was, by the
same Assembly, appointed his successor. He died in 1644. He is
mentioned by Livingstone, as one of the "many of the godly and
able ministers" in Scotland. He was a member of the famous
Glasgow Assembly, 1638. Lady Gaitgirth's mansion was near
Ochiltree; see Letter CLXXXVII.]
(_THE ROD UPON GOD'S CHILDREN--PAIN FROM A SENSE OF CHRIST'S LOVE--HIS
PRESENCE A SUPPORT UNDER TRIALS--CONTENTEDNESS WITH HIM ALONE._)
REVEREND AND WELL-BELOVED IN THE LORD,--I was refreshed with your
letter. I am sorry for that lingering and longsome visitation that is
upon your wife; but I know that ye take it as the mark of a lawfully
begotten child, and not of a bastard, to be under your Father's rod.
Till ye be in heaven, it will be but foul weather; one shower up and
another down. The lintel-stone and pillars of the New Jerusalem suffer
more knocks of God's hammer and tool than the common side-wall stones.
And if twenty crosses be written for you in God's book, they will come
to nineteen, and then at last to one, and after that to nothing, but
your head shall lie betwixt Christ's breasts for evermore and His own
soft hand shall dry your face, and wipe away your tears. As for public
sufferings for His truth, your Master also will see to these. Let us
put Him into His own office, to comfort and deliver. The gloom of
Christ's cross is worse than itself.
I cannot keep up what He hath done to my soul. My dear brother, will I
not get help of you to praise, and to lift Christ up on high? He hath
pained me with His love, and hath left a love-arrow in my heart, that
hath made a wound, and swelled me up with desires, so that I am to be
pitied for want of real possession. Love would have the company of the
party loved; and my greatest pain is the want of Him, not of His joys
and comforts, but of a near union and communion.
This is His truth, I am fully persuaded, which I now suffer for; for
Christ hath taken upon Him to be witness to it by His sweet comforts
to my soul; and shall I think Him a false witness? or that He would
subscribe blank paper? I thank His high and dreadful name for what He
hath given. I hope to keep His seal and His pawn till He come and
loose it Himself. I defy hell to put me off it. But He is Christ, and
He hath met with His prisoner; and I took instruments in His own hand,
that it was He, and none other for Him. When the devil fenceth a
bastard-court[207] in my Lord's ground, and giveth me forged summons,
it will be my shame to misbelieve, after such a fair broad seal. And
yet Satan and my apprehension sometimes make a lie of Christ, as if He
hated me. But I dare believe no evil of Christ. If He would cool my
love-fever for Himself with real presence and possession, I would be
rich; but I dare not be mislearned and seek more in that kind, howbeit
it be no shame to beg at Christ's door. I pity my adversaries. I
grudge not that my Lord keepeth them at their own fireside, and hath
given me a borrowed fireside: let the Goodman of the house cast the
dog a bone, why should I take offence? I rejoice that the broken bark
shall come to land, and that Christ will, on the shore, welcome the
sea-sick passenger. We have need of a great stock against this day of
trial that is coming. There is neither chaff nor corn in Scotland, but
it shall once[208] pass through God's sieve. Praise, praise, and pray
for me; for I cannot forget you. I know that ye will be friendly to my
afflicted brother, who is now embarked in the same cause with me. Let
him have your counsel and comforts.
[207] Opens and constitutes an unauthorized court.
[208] Sooner or later.
Remember my love in Christ to your wife; her health is coming, and her
salvation sleepeth not. Ye have the prayers and blessing of a prisoner
of Christ. Sow fast, deal bread plentifully. The pantry-door will be
locked on the bairns, in appearance, ere long. Grace, grace, be with
you.
Yours in his sweet Lord Jesus,