(_CONSCIOUSNESS OF DEFECTS NO ARGUMENT OF CHRIST BEING UNKNOWN--HIS
EXPERIENCE IN EXILE._)
MADAM,--Grace, mercy, and peace be to you, from God our Father, and
from our Lord Jesus Christ.
I cannot but thank your Ladyship for your letter, that hath refreshed
my soul. I think myself many ways obliged to your Ladyship for your
love to my afflicted brother, now embarked with me in that same cause.
His Lord hath been pleased to put him on truth's side. I hope that
your Ladyship will befriend him with your counsel and countenance in
that country, where he is a stranger. And your Ladyship needeth not
fear but your kindness to His own will be put up into Christ's
accounts.
Now, Madam, for your Ladyship's case. I rejoice exceedingly that the
Father of lights hath made you see that there is a nick in
Christianity, which ye contend to be at; and that is, to quit the
right eye, and the right hand, and to keep the Son of God. I hope your
desire is to make Him your garland, and that your eye looketh up the
mount, which certainly is nothing but the new creature. Fear not,
Christ will not cast water upon your smoking coal; and then who else
dare do it if He say nay? Be sorry at corruption, and be not secure.
That companion lay with you in your mother's womb, and was as early
friends with you as the breath of life. And Christ will not have it
otherwise; for He delighteth to take up fallen bairns, and to mend
broken brows. Binding up of wounds is His office (Isa. lxi. 1).
_First_, I am glad that Christ will get employment of His calling in
you. Many a whole soul is in heaven which was sickerer than ye are. He
is content that ye lay broken arms and legs on His knee, that He may
spelk them. _Secondly_, hiding of His face is wise love. His love is
not fond, doting, and reasonless, to give your head no other pillow
whill ye be in at heaven's gates, but to lie between His breasts, and
lean upon His bosom. Nay, His bairns must often have the frosty cold
side of the hill, and set down both their bare feet among thorns. His
love hath eyes, and, in the meantime, is looking on. Our pride must
have winter weather to rot it. But I know that Christ and ye will not
be heard;[203] ye will whisper it over betwixt yourselves, and agree
again. For the anchor-tow abideth fast within the vail; the end of it
is in Christ's ten fingers: who dare pull, if He hold? "I, the Lord
thy God, will hold thy right hand, saying, Fear not, I will help thee.
Fear not, Jacob" (Isa. xli. 13, 14). The sea-sick passenger shall come
to land; Christ will be the first to meet you on the shore. I hope
that your ladyship will keep the King's highway. Go on (in the
strength of the Lord), in haste, as if ye had not leisure to speak to
the innkeepers by the way. He is over beyond time, on the other side
of the water, who thinketh long for you.
[203] No one will ever hear the chiding. See Note, Letter LXX.
For my unfaithful self, Madam, I must say a word. At my first coming
hither, the devil made many a black lie of my Lord Jesus, and said the
court was changed, and He was angry, and would give an evil servant
his leave at mid-term.[204] But He gave me grace not to take my leave.
I resolved to bide summons, and sit, howbeit it was suggested and
said, "What should be done with a withered tree, but over the dyke
with it?" But now, now (I dare not, I dow not keep it up!), who is
feasted as His poor exiled prisoner. I think shame of the board-head
and the first mess, and the royal King's dining-hall, and that my
black hand should come upon such a Ruler's table. But I cannot mend
it; Christ must have His will: only He paineth my soul so sometimes
with His love, that I have been nigh to pass modesty, and to cry out.
He hath left a smoking, burning coal in my heart, and gone to the door
Himself, and left me and it together. Yet it is not desertion; I know
not what it is, but I was never so sick for Him as now. I durst not
challenge my Lord, if I got no more for heaven; it is a dawting cross.
I know He hath other things to do than to play with me, and to
trindle an apple with me, and that this feast will end. O for
instruments in God's name, that this is He! and that I may make use of
it, when, it may be, a near friend within me will say, and when it
will be said by a challenging devil, "Where is thy God?" Since I know
that it will not last, I desire but to keep broken meat. But let no
man after me slander Christ for His cross.
[204] Discharge His servant before the term.
The great Lord of the Covenant, who brought from the dead the great
Shepherd of His sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant establish
you, and keep you and yours to His appearance.
Yours in his sweet Lord Jesus,