LONDON, October 22, O. S. 1750

MY DEAR FRIEND: This letter will, I am persuaded, find you, and I hope

safely, arrived at Montpelier; from whence I trust that Mr. Harte’s

indisposition will, by being totally removed, allow you to get to Paris

before Christmas. You will there find two people who, though both

English, I recommend in the strongest manner possible to your attention;

and advise you to form the most intimate connections with them both, in

their different ways. The one is a man whom you already know something

of, but not near enough: it is the Earl of Huntingdon; who, next to you,

is the truest object of my affection and esteem; and who (I am proud to

say it) calls me, and considers me as his adopted father. His parts are

as quick as his knowledge is extensive; and if quality were worth putting

into an account, where every other item is so much more valuable, he is

the first almost in this country: the figure he will make in it, soon

after he returns to it, will, if I am not more mistaken than ever I was

in my life, equal his birth and my hopes. Such a connection will be of

infinite advantage to you; and, I can assure you, that he is extremely

disposed to form it upon my account; and will, I hope and believe, desire

to improve and cement it upon your own.

In our parliamentary government, connections are absolutely necessary;

and, if prudently formed and ably maintained, the success of them is

infallible. There are two sorts of connections, which I would always

advise you to have in view. The first I will call equal ones; by which I

mean those, where the two connecting parties reciprocally find their

account, from pretty near an equal degree of parts and abilities. In

those, there must be a freer communication; each must see that the other

is able, and be convinced that he is willing to be of use to him. Honor

must be the principle of such connections; and there must be a mutual

dependence, that present and separate interest shall not be able to break

them. There must be a joint system of action; and, in case of different

opinions, each must recede a little, in order at last to form an

unanimous one. Such, I hope, will be your connection with Lord

Huntingdon. You will both come into parliament at the same time; and if

you have an equal share of abilities and application, you and he, with

other young people, with whom you will naturally associate, may form a

band which will be respected by any administration, and make a figure in

the public. The other sort of connections I call unequal ones; that is,

where the parts are all on one side, and the rank and fortune on the

other. Here, the advantage is all on one side; but that advantage must be

ably and artfully concealed. Complaisance, an engaging manner, and a

patient toleration of certain airs of superiority, must cement them. The

weaker party must be taken by the heart, his head giving no hold; and he

must be governed by being made to believe that he governs. These people,

skillfully led, give great weight to their leader. I have formerly

pointed out to you a couple that I take to be proper objects for your

skill; and you will meet with twenty more, for they are very rife.

The other person whom I recommended to you is a woman; not as a woman,

for that is not immediately my business; besides, I fear that she is

turned of fifty. It is Lady Hervey, whom I directed you to call upon at

Dijon, but who, to my great joy, because to your great advantage, passes

all this winter at Paris. She has been bred all her life at courts; of

which she has acquired all the easy good-breeding and politeness, without

the frivolousness. She has all the reading that a woman should have; and

more than any woman need have; for she understands Latin perfectly well,

though she wisely conceals it. As she will look upon you as her son, I

desire that you will look upon her as my delegate: trust, consult, and

apply to her without reserve. No woman ever had more than she has, ‘le

ton de la parfaitement bonne compagnie, les manieres engageantes, et le

je ne sais quoi qui plait’. Desire her to reprove and correct any, and

every the least error and inaccuracy in your manners, air, address,

etc. No woman in Europe can do it so well; none will do it more

willingly, or in a more proper and obliging manner. In such a case she

will not put you out of countenance, by telling you of it in company; but

either intimate it by some sign, or wait for an opportunity when you are

alone together. She is also in the best French company, where she will

not only introduce but PUFF you, if I may use so low a word. And I can

assure you that it is no little help, in the ‘beau monde’, to be puffed

there by a fashionable woman. I send you the inclosed billet to carry

her, only as a certificate of the identity of your person, which I take

it for granted she could not know again.

You would be so much surprised to receive a whole letter from me without

any mention of the exterior ornaments necessary for a gentleman, as

manners, elocution, air, address, graces, etc., that, to comply with your

expectations, I will touch upon them; and tell you, that when you come to

England, I will show you some people, whom I do not now care to name,

raised to the highest stations singly by those exterior and adventitious

ornaments, whose parts would never have entitled them to the smallest

office in the excise. Are they then necessary, and worth acquiring, or

not? You will see many instances of this kind at Paris, particularly a

glaring one, of a person--[M. le Marechal de Richelieu]--raised to the

highest posts and dignities in France, as well as to be absolute

sovereign of the ‘beau monde’, simply by the graces of his person and

address; by woman’s chit-chat, accompanied with important gestures; by an

imposing air and pleasing abord. Nay, by these helps, he even passes for

a wit, though he hath certainly no uncommon share of it. I will not name

him, because it would be very imprudent in you to do it. A young fellow,

at his first entrance into the ‘beau monde’, must not offend the king ‘de

facto’ there. It is very often more necessary to conceal contempt than

resentment, the former forgiven, but the latter sometimes forgot.

There is a small quarto book entitled, ‘Histoire Chronologique de la

France’, lately published by Le President Henault, a man of parts and

learning, with whom you will probably get acquainted at Paris. I desire

that it may always lie upon your table, for your recourse as often as you

read history. The chronology, though chiefly relative to the history of

France, is not singly confined to it; but the most interesting events of

all the rest of Europe are also inserted, and many of them adorned by

short, pretty, and just reflections. The new edition of ‘Les Memoires de

Sully’, in three quarto volumes, is also extremely well worth your

reading, as it will give you a clearer, and truer notion of one of the

most interesting periods of the French history, than you can yet have

formed from all the other books you may have read upon the subject. That

prince, I mean Henry the Fourth, had all the accomplishments and virtues

of a hero, and of a king, and almost of a man. The last are the most

rarely seen. May you possess them all! Adieu.

Pray make my compliments to Mr. Harte, and let him know that I have this

moment received his letter of the 12th, N. S., from Antibes. It requires

no immediate answer; I shall therefore delay mine till I have another

from him. Give him the inclosed, which I have received from Mr. Eliot.

Letters to His Son, Complete On the Fine Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman · 第 179 / 512 题