What’s the use o’ laughter,
What’s the use o’ strife,
To a gloomy shafter
In this team of Life?
Hear the whips a-crackin’
Through the atmosphere,
When the traces slacken—
Let us have a beer.
What’s the use o’ flayin’
Loathsome gads and drills?
What’s the use o’ payin’
Other people’s bills?
Let the missus hustle,
Let the kinchins clear;
I’m not goin’ to bustle—
Let us have a beer.
What’s the use o’ prayin’?
’Taint no use to curse;
What’s the use o’ layin’
’Gainst the winning hearse?
Man at best’s a rotter,
Fried and frizzled here;
Hell can’t be no hotter—
Let us have a beer.
What’s the use o’ sittin’
Dry as blessed chips?
What’s the use o’ spittin’
Through our corn-beef lips?
What’s the use o’ drinkin’?
Well, that ain’t so clear
To my way of thinkin’—
Let us have a beer.
What’s the use o’ frettin’
Cos you missed the pot?
What’s the use o’ gettin’
In a tied-up knot
Bet you can’t unravel
If you tried a year?
No, that cop don’t travel—
Let us have a beer.
What’s the——? Oh, _I’m_ toilin’
Down the Boulder way—
Only just been spoilin’
Arf a quid a day.
Now you bet I’m chargin’
Homewards at my top.
* * * * *
What’s the use o’ bargin’
With a white-eyed slop?