Crowheart was surprised but not shocked when the engagement of Andy P.
Symes to the blacksmith's sister was announced. It saw no mesalliance in
the union. It was merely unaware that he had been attentive to Augusta
Kunkel. Now they were to be married in the long dining-room of the
Terriberry House and take the night train for Chicago on their
honeymoon.
Dr. Harpe standing at the window of her new office on the second floor
of the hotel smiled to herself as she saw the chairs going inside which
served equally well for funerals or for social functions. The match, she
felt, was really of her making.
"You've got to do it," she had told him. "You've simply got to do it."
He had come to see her at Augusta's insistence.
"But!" he had groaned; "a Kunkel! Perhaps you don't know--but I'm one of
the Symes of Maine. Great-grandfather a personal friend of Alexander
Hamilton's, and all that. My family don't expect _much_ of me since I'm
the black sheep, but," a dull red had surged over his face, "they expect
something better of me than a Kunkel!"
She had shrugged her shoulders.
"Suit yourself, I'm only telling you how it looks to me. You'll queer
yourself forever if you don't marry her, for this country is still
western enough to respect women. You are just starting in to promote
this irrigation project and if you succeed you can't tell what the
future will hold for you politically; this is just the sort of thing to
bob up and down you. You know I'm right."
"But she looks so obviously what she is," he had groaned miserably.
"Some day I may want to go home--and think of introducing Augusta
Kunkel!"
"You are wrong there," she had replied with conviction, "Augusta has
possibilities. She has good eyes, her voice is low, her English is far
better than you might expect, and, best of all, she's tall and slender.
If she was short and fat I'd call her rather hopeless, but you hang good
clothes on these slim ones and it works wonders. Besides, she's
imitative as a parrot."
He had thrown his arms aloft in despair.
"But think of it!--the rest of my life--with a parrot."
"It's the lesser of two evils," she had urged, and in the end he had
said dully:
"I guess you're right, Dr. Harpe. Your advice no doubt is good, though,
like your medicine, a bitter dose just now. You've done me a favor, I
suppose, and I'll not forget it."
"When the door of her office had closed upon his broad back she had said
to herself:
"I'll see that you don't forget it." And she repeated it again with
renewed satisfaction. She liked the feeling that she already had become
a factor in the affairs of Crowheart and she intended to remain one.
The practice of medicine with Dr. Harpe was frankly for personal gain.
No ideals had influenced her in the choice of her profession and her
practice of it had developed no ambition save the single one of
building up a bank account. The ethical distinction between the trades
and professions, which is based upon the fact that the professional man
or woman is supposed to take up his or her life work primarily because
he loves both his profession and the people whom it may benefit, was a
distinction which she never had grasped. She practised medicine in the
same commercial spirit that a cheap drummer builds up a trade. She had
no sentiment regarding it, none of the ambitious dreams of high
professional standing attained by meritorious work which inspire those
who achieve. It was a business pure and simple; each patient was a
customer.
Another consideration in her choice of this profession was the freedom
it gave her. Because of it she was exempt from many of the restrictions
and conventionalities which hampered her sex, and above all else she
disliked restraint.
She was the single result of a "typhoid romance." Her mother, a trained
nurse, had attended a St. Louis politician during a long illness. Upon
his recovery he married his nurse and as promptly deserted her,
providing a modest support for the child. She had grown to womanhood in
a cheap boarding school, attaining thereby a superficial education but
sufficient to enable her to pass the preliminary examinations necessary
to begin her studies in the medical college which was an outcast among
its kind and known among the profession as a "diploma mill." She
selected it because the course was easy and the tuition light, though
its equipment was a farce and its laboratory too meagre to deserve the
name; one of the commercial medical colleges turning out each year by
the hundreds, for a few dollars, illiterate graduates, totally unfitted
by temperament and education for a profession that calls for the highest
and best, sending them out in hordes like licensed murderers to
prescribe and operate among the trusting and the ignorant.
Dr. Harpe had framed her sheepskin and been duly photographed in her
cap and gown; then, after a short hospital experience, she had gone to
the little Nebraska town where perhaps the most forceful comment upon
the success of her career there was that the small steamer trunk, which
she was now opening, contained very comfortably both her summer and
winter wardrobe.
Her pose was an air of camaraderie, of blunt good-nature. Her
conspicuous walk was a swaggering stride, while in dress she affected
the masculine severity of some professional women. Her hair was the dull
red that is nearly brown and she wore it coiled in trying simplicity at
the back of her head. Her handsome eyes were the hazel that is
alternately brown and green and gray, sometimes an odd mixture of all
three. Ordinarily there was a suspicion of hardness in her face but
there was also upon occasions a kind of winsomeness, an unexpected
peeping out of a personality which was like the wraith of the child
which she once had been--a suggestion of girlish charm and spontaneity
utterly unlike her usual self.
This attractive phase of her personality was uppermost as she sought in
the trunk for something to wear, and a smile curved the corners of her
straight lips and brought out a faint cleft in her square chin, as she
inspected its contents.
She found what she wanted in a plain cloth skirt and a white tailored
waist with stiffly starched cuffs, and a man's sleeve links. When she
was dressed a man's linen waistcoat with a black silk watch-fob hanging
from the pocket added further to the unfeminine _tout ensemble_. She
liked the effect, and, as she thrust a scarf-pin in the long black
"four-in-hand" before her mirror, she viewed the result with
satisfaction.
Dr. Harpe regarded the wedding as exceedingly opportune for herself,
bringing in as it did the settlers from the isolated ranches and
outlying districts of the big county, and she meant it to serve as her
real debut in the community.
It was in fact a notable event for the reason that it was the first
wedding in Crowheart, and, since the invitation was general, the guests
were coming from far and near to show their approval and incidentally
perhaps to partake of the champagne which it was rumored was to flow
like water. Champagne was the standard by which Crowheart gauged the
success of an entertainment and certainly Andy P. Symes was not the man
to serve sarsaparilla at his own wedding.
When Dr. Harpe came downstairs she found the long dining-room cleared of
its tables and already well filled with guests. "Curly" the camp cook
was caressing his violin, and "Snake River Jim," tolerably drunk, was in
his place beside him, while Ole Peterson, redolent of the livery-stable
in which he worked, constantly felt his muscle to show that he was
prepared to do his share with the big bass drum.
As Andy P. Symes moved through the rapidly growing crowd no one but Dr.
Harpe guessed that he winced inwardly at the resounding slaps upon his
back and the congratulations or that his heart all but failed him when
he saw his bride-to-be in her bobinet veil, a flush upon her broad face
and following his every movement with adoring eyes. To all but Dr. Harpe
he looked the fortunate and beaming bridegroom and only she saw the tiny
lines which sleeplessness had left about his eyes or detected the
hollowness of his frequent laughter.
It was more or less of a relief to all when the ceremony was over and
the nervous and perspiring Justice of the Peace, miserable in a collar,
had wished them every known joy. It was a relief to Symes who kissed his
bride perfunctorily and returned her to weeping "Grandmother" Kunkel's
arms--a relief to those impatient to dance--a relief to the thirsty
whose surreptitious glances wandered in spite of their best efforts
toward the pile of champagne cases in the corner.
But the reward of patience came to all, and as the violin and guitar
tuned up the popping of corks was assurance enough that the unsurpassed
thirst created by alkali dust would shortly be assuaged. "Hank"
Terriberry, in whose competent charge Symes had placed this portion of
the wedding entertainment, realizing that, at best, pouring from a
bottle and drinking from a glass is a slow and tedious process, to
facilitate matters had provided two large, bright, new dish-pans which
he filled with wine, also a plentiful supply of bright, new, tin
dippers.
They drank Symes's health in long, deep draughts and it was with some
forebodings that Symes noted the frequency with which the same guests
appeared in line. Symes had no great desire that his wedding should go
down in the annals of Crowheart as the most complete drunk in its
history nor was his bank account inexhaustible. Also he observed with,
annoyance that his newly-created brother-in-law, Adolph Kunkel, had
retired to a quiet corner where he might drink from the bottle
unmolested. Adolph Kunkel, sober, was bad enough, but Adolph Kunkel,
drunk, was worse.
That his fears were not unfounded was shortly made evident by the
appearance of Sylvanus Starr with a bland, bucolic smile upon his
wafer-like countenance and his scant foretop tied in a baby-blue ribbon
which had embellished the dainty ham sandwiches provided by Mrs.
Terriberry. By the time the dance was well under way eyes had brightened
perceptibly and sunburned faces had taken on a deeper hue while Snake
River Jim sat with a pickle behind his ear and his eyes rolled to the
ceiling as though entranced by his own heavenly strains.
As the room grew warmer, the conversation waxed louder, the dance faster
and the whoops of exuberance more frequent, until Bedlam reigned. Percy
Parrot chancing to observe "Tinhorn Frank" sliding toward the door with
two unopened bottles of champagne protruding from his coat pockets made
a low tackle and clasped him about the ankles. As "Tinhorn" lay prone he
was shamed in vivid English by the graceful barber while the new
plasterer excused himself from his partner long enough to kick the
prostrate ingrate in the ribs. Mrs. "Hank" Terriberry, whose hair looked
like a pair of angora "chaps" in a high wind, returning from her third
trip to the dish-pan, burst into tears at the man's depravity and
inadvertently wiped her streaming eyes on the end of her long lace jabot
instead of her handkerchief.
Sylvanus Starr, declaring that his chivalrous nature was unable to
endure the sight of a woman's tears, sought to divert her by slipping
his arm about her waist and whirling her dizzily the length of the room
and back again where they were met by Mr. Terriberry who, while
playfully endeavoring to snatch his wife from the editor's encircling
arms, accidentally stepped on the train of her black satin skirt. There
was a popping, ripping sound! In the brief but awful second while this
handsome creation slid to the floor, Mrs. Terriberry stood
panic-stricken in a short, red-flannel petticoat. She screamed
piercingly and with the sound of her own voice recovered her presence of
mind. Swooping, she picked up the garment and bounded out of the room,
thereby revealing upon her plump calves the encircling stripes of a pair
of white and black stockings.
The milliner, who was clairvoyant, covered her face with her gauze fan,
while Pearline and Planchette Starr asked to be taken into the air, and
left the room each leaning heavily upon an arm of the "Sheep King of
Poison Crick."
The remittance man from Devonshire removed the crash towel from its
roller in the wash-room off the hotel office, and spread it carefully on
the floor in a corner to protect his clothing while he refreshed himself
with a short nap.
A Roumanian prince who had that day returned from a big game hunt in the
mountains and who had been cordially urged by Symes to honor his
wedding, adjusted his monocle and stood on a chair under a kerosene
wall-lamp that he might the better inspect the fig "filling" of Mrs.
Terriberry's layer cake which he seemed to regard with some suspicion.
Mrs. Abe Tutts, who was reputed to have histrionic ability, of her own
accord recited in a voice which made the welkin ring: "Shoot if you will
this old gray head, But spare my country's flag." Whereupon "Baby"
Briggs, six foot two in his cowboy boots, produced a six-shooter and
humorously pretended to be about to take her at her word. Mrs. Tutts was
revived from a fainting condition by a drink while "Baby" Briggs was
relieved of his weapon.
"Take your pardners for a quadrille!" yelled Curly, the camp cook,
rising from his chair.
The guests scrambled for places in the quickly formed sets.
"Swing your pardner!" he whooped.
Andy P. Symes slipped his arm about Essie Tisdale's waist and the dance
moved fast and furious.
"Join your hands and circle to the left!"
Around they went in a giddy whirl and starched petticoats stood out like
hoopskirts.
"First lady swing with the right hand round with the right hand gent!"
The train of Mrs. Abe Tutts's diaphanous "tea-gown" laid out on the
breeze, thereby revealing the fact that she was wearing Congress
gaiters, comfortable but not "dressy."
"Pardner with your left with your left hand round!"
Andy P. Symes held Essie Tisdale's hand in a lingering clasp and
whispered in foolish flattery:
"Terpsichore herself outdone!"
"Swing in the centre and seven hands around. Birdie hop out and crow hop
in! Take holt of paddies and run around agin!"
Abe Tutts executed a double shuffle on the corner.
"Allemande Joe! Eight hand to pardner and around you go! Balance to
corners, don't be slack! Turn right around and take a back track! When
you git home, don't be afraid. Swing her agin and all promenade!"
It was a glorious dance and it moved unflaggingly to the end; but when
it was done and the dancers laughing and exhausted sought their seats,
it was discovered that Snake River Jim had fallen to weeping because he
said it was his unhappy lot to work while others danced.
Therefore Sylvanus Starr suggested that out of a delicate regard for an
artist's feelings, and no one could deny but Snake River Jim was that,
the dance be temporarily suspended while the bridegroom and others
expressed their sentiments and delight in the occasion by a few remarks,
Sylvanus Starr himself setting the example by bursting into an eulogy
which had the impassioned fervor of inspiration.
The vocabulary of laudatory adjectives gleaned in many years' experience
in the obituary department of an eastern newspaper were ejected like
volcanic matter, red hot and unrestrained, running over and around the
name of Symes to harden into sentences of which "a magnificent specimen
of manhood, a physical and intellectual giant, gallantly snatching from
our midst the fairest flower that ever bloomed upon a desert waste,"
only moderately illustrates the editor's gift of language.
When Andy P. Symes stood on a chair and faced the expectant throng the
few trite remarks which he had in mind all but fled when his eyes fell
for the first time upon his bride buttoned into her "going away gown."
As he mounted the chair his face wore the set smile of the man who
means to die a nervy death on the gallows. His voice sounded strained
and unnatural to himself as he began:
"Ladies and gentlemen."
"Wee-hee!" squealed a youth in a leather collar and a rattleskin
necktie.
"This is the happiest moment of my life!"
"Wee-ough! It ought to be!" yelled the "Sheep King of Poison Crick" as
he pressed the arms of the Misses Starr gently and impartially against
his sides.
"Also the proudest moment." He looked at his bride, noting that she wore
a broach which might have belonged on a set of harness.
"Yip! Yip! Yee-ough!"
"I am deeply conscious of my own unworthiness and not insensible to the
fact that the gods have singled me out for special favor----"
Any reference to the gods was considered a mark of learning and
eloquence, so Symes's humble admission was loudly applauded.
"Love, the Wise Ones say, 'is blind.' If this is true it is my earnest
wish that I may remain so, for I desire to continue to regard my wife as
the most beautiful, attractive, charming of her sex." He bowed
elaborately toward the grotesque figure whose adoring eyes were fixed
upon his face.
The guests howled in ecstasy at this flight of sentiment and only Dr.
Harpe caught the sneering note beneath the commonplaces he uttered with
such convincing fervor.
"What a cad," she thought, yet she looked in something like admiration
at his towering figure. "If only he had brains in proportion to his body
he might accomplish great things here," she murmured. Shrugging her
shoulder, she added: "I envy him his chance."
It did not occur to any person present that this wedding was an
important, far-reaching event to any save the principals; but to Essie
Tisdale and to Dr. Harpe it was a turning point in their careers. It
meant waning triumphs to the merry little belle of Crowheart, while it
spread a fallow field before Dr. Harpe the planting of which in deeds of
good or evil was as surely in her hands as is the seed the farmer sows
for his ultimate harvest. Which it was to be, can be surmised from the
fact that already she was considering how soon, and in what way, she
might utilize her knowledge after Symes's return from his wedding
journey.