_Occurrences at Glen Morgan._
In the evening of this very day, after all the melancholy duties
incidental to it had been discharged, John De Lancaster detached himself
from the company, and striking into a gloomy walk of unclipt yew trees,
appertaining to what by courtesy was called the pleasure ground, at the
extremity of it surprised Amelia, solitary and unconscious of his
approach, reposing herself on a seat under the shade of a tree, whose
branches through their openings gave a glimpse of her figure, which
might well have escaped any eyes but those of a lover.
Upon discovering him as he approached, the timid damsel started from her
seat, and was preparing to withdraw, when with that gentle action, which
more resembles intercession than compulsion having induced her to resume
her seat, he said--It has been a long and tedious banishment, to which
your governess condemned me: and since my good fortune has now thrown an
opportunity in my way, which I have ardently wished for, and of which I
may honourably avail myself, don’t think me too importunate, if I
solicit you to give me a hearing whilst I discharge my conscience of a
duty, that I owe to the parent, whom we have this day followed to the
grave. Perhaps Miss Jones, you are not apprised by what solemn
obligations I am bound to consider your honour, interest and happiness
unalienably connected and interwoven with my own. How dear you were to
my departed mother I well know; what I professed to you in our first and
only interview I religiously bear in mind: I have every impression of
your merit, every sensibility of your charms both of mind and person,
that our very short acquaintance could inspire, and by the sacred
solemnity of this day I swear to you, that, if Heaven grants me life, I
will live to your service.
Mr. De Lancaster, she replied, though I cannot at this moment find
expressions for my gratitude, I hope you will believe, that, if I felt
it less, I could express it better. It is indeed a very long time since
you honoured me with your visit, and of course this is the very first
instant I can profit by for returning my most heart-felt thanks for your
invaluable present, which by some misunderstanding on the part of Mrs.
Jennings I have till now unhappily been deprived of doing. As I did not
know that you had been the bearer of that kind present till after you
had left the house, I must not presume to judge of your reasons for
resenting the reception, that you met with from the lady, under whose
care I am; but I may venture to assure you, it was never her intention
to give offence to Mr. De Lancaster, and I must leave it with yourself
to reflect, whether it is consistent with your idea of what is just and
right to harbour a lasting resentment for an unpremeditated trespass.
If you judge me by appearances, Miss Jones, he replied, I may suffer in
your good opinion; but in absenting myself from Mrs. Jennings’s house I
conceive I only acted as every man of honour ought to act towards a
lady, who gave him clearly to understand that his visits were unwelcome.
You may not have been informed that the very first time I waited upon
you at Denbigh she intimated this to me most pointedly by letter, and
when a second time I was not suffered to deliver into your hands what I
had in charge to give you from my mother, judge if I could so
misunderstand either her or myself, as ever to intrude again, and
provoke her to give me a more explicit dismission.
Alas, sir, replied Amelia, how it came to pass, that Mrs. Jennings so
misjudged the case I know not; but that she is incapable of a designed
affront I am perfectly persuaded. You well know the situation, in which
we jointly stand towards the families of De Lancaster and Morgan, which
meet and centre in your single person; and I think you cannot fail to
find good reason on our part, why we should not wilfully fail in respect
towards those, upon whose bounty we subsist.
Ah lovely Amelia, exclaimed the enamoured youth, when you humble
yourself to speak of obligations to my family in these terms, you compel
me to declare to you, that I have no higher ambition at my heart, nor is
there any prouder honour I can aspire to, than to render myself in time
not totally unworthy of a place in your esteem: you must suffer me to
tell you, that such was the impression I received upon the sight of you,
when I was bearer of the token, which the poor soldier was entrusted
with, and so ardent was my desire to avail myself of the introduction,
which my departed mother’s commission for the second time afforded me,
that the unexpected cold reception I encountered from your governess was
such a cutting disappointment, that I could not conquer my ungovernable
temper, and was driven to commit a thousand wild extravagancies, that
upon reflection I am ashamed of: therefore it was, that upon
self-examination discovering my unworthiness, and want of education to
correct my errors, I avoided all society but of my teacher and my books,
and laboured diligently to retrieve the time, that I had lost. How far I
may have succeeded time must show: all I can say for myself is, that I
have not been sparing of my efforts, and if henceforward I may be
favoured with access to you, I shall have an object in my view, whose
approbation, if I can deserve it and obtain it, will be the highest
reward this world can give me, and the one great blessing of my life.
He had, whilst he was addressing her in these emphatic words, taken her
hand in his, and she now for sometime, without attempting to withdraw
it, sate silent, meditative, with her eyes fixt upon the ground, and her
face suffused with blushes.
The terms, in which she had heard herself addressed, were such as could
not be misunderstood; it is natural also to suppose they could not be
unwelcome: they certainly demanded an answer, but how to shape that
answer between the extremes of too much and too little sensibility was
to the modest, unassuming, diffident Amelia an embarassment that her
inexperience was not qualified to surmount. She had however made an
effort to attempt some general acknowledgments, better graced and easier
to be understood by the look and action that accompanied them than by
the language, when the sudden approach of Cecilia in an instant
dispelled both the pleasure and the pain of this unfinished explanation,
and gave her to understand that Mr. De Lancaster had something to impart
to her, and was anxiously expecting the pleasure of her company.
Upon the word she rose, bowed respectful obedience to the summons, and
turned a look upon the party, she was now constrained to leave, so
marked with feeling and so fraught with mind, that our hero must have
been dull indeed had he needed any comment to explain its meaning.