THE VOICE OF TRUTH
"And I," returned Linda, clasping her hands behind her head as she
leaned back beside her friend, "I have felt that nothing was too bad to
be true."
Mrs. Porter did not speak; and after a short silence, the girl
continued:--
"In the happy days, I tore off a leaf from your Bible calendar, and
one morning, when everything was black and despairing, I found it in
my bag. It read, 'Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir tree, and
instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree.' I suppose I was
like the drowning man, and this promise, impersonal and silent, was a
straw to be clung to blindly. At any rate, I couldn't throw it away;
and it persisted in ringing through my confused head. Soon your letter
came. Oh, Mrs. Porter--" Linda choked and ceased.
Her companion laid a comforting hand upon her for a moment and withdrew
it.
"You will never know what you did for me," went on the girl presently:
"do you know what it means to a despairing one to be given a gleam of
hope? You can't, unless you know it by experience."
"I know it by experience," returned Mrs. Porter quietly.
Her companion glanced around at the calm face for a fleeting instant.
Could it be possible that such poise would ever be won for herself?
"It was a willingness to listen to you, and the hope that I could
believe you, that brought me, shrinking and shuddering as I was, out
of my home and into the train and here. Then, on the train, came this
letter that Aunt Belinda told you about. It brought me more of peace
and hope than I had dreamed of. I have dared to think since then. Here
it is."
The speaker passed to her companion the envelope she had been holding
tightly.
Mrs. Porter accepted it in silence and took out the letter. As she
read, a deeper color mounted to her cheeks, but Linda did not observe
this. She had dropped her hands in her lap and her eyes were fixed on
the clear-cut horizon line.
"Dear Bertram!" exclaimed Mrs. Porter as she finished. Then she read
the letter again. Finally, she folded the sheet, put it in its envelope
and handed it back to Linda. Her face wore the radiance for which her
pupils were wont to watch as the highest reward for achievement.
"Splendid," she said. "Tell me why news so vital should have been
addressed to Miss Barry instead of to you."
Linda's grave gaze met hers.
"I don't like to tell you, Mrs. Porter," she answered.
"You needn't fear, dear child."
"Oh, I can't go into it again, I can't!" exclaimed Linda, suddenly
averting her head.
"As you please, dear. I don't want to force you; but I know so well
that what you quoted a few minutes ago is as true as that two and two
make four. Instead of the thorn _will_ come up the fir tree, as soon as
you cease to give the thorn nourishment."
"I give it nourishment?" Linda's brow contracted. "Do you mean that I
nurse grief? You're mistaken."
"No, I didn't mean that. I love Bertram, and something very wrong must
have occurred to cause him not to mention you in that letter. I want
you to be happy. I want for you just what your father is getting now:
greater knowledge of God and His love and wisdom and guidance. You see
that guidance is the most everyday thing in the world: the closest;
not anything far away or mysterious. If it is your fault that Bertram
ignores you in this--"
"Oh, no, no!" interrupted Linda. "It is not my fault. It is poor
Bertram who brought us all to this. I appreciate more every time I
read that letter--and I know it by heart--how valiantly he has worked
to undo the mischief. At first I didn't pity him in the least, because
the crime of getting my father into all that trouble overwhelmed my
thoughts at every turn; but, of course, I can see now that it has been
a hard experience for Bertram as well."
Linda ceased, catching her lower lip between her teeth.
"I know something of what you refer to," rejoined Mrs. Porter. "I know
Bertram's reputation for influence in Barry & Co."
"And you have been so good to me," said Linda hurriedly, "and Bertram
is your cousin, and, as you say, you love him, I--I can't bear to
discuss him with you."
"But I can bear it, Linda, if you will allow me to ask you one
question. Do you believe that Bertram intended any harm to your father?"
"No," came the quick answer; "but he is so conceited and so
opinionated--"
"If you believe him innocent of wrong intention, should you become his
enemy--"
Linda's pale cheeks flushed and she straightened up.
"When a person strikes you a murderous blow, Mrs. Porter, can you,
before recovering breath, care much whether it was accidental or
intentional?"
"No! but after recovering breath, you can. What do you believe your
father would say to your treatment of Bertram?"
Linda glanced around at her companion quickly. "Aunt Belinda has been
talking to you," she said.
"She wrote me something of it before she came home. This letter that I
have just read tells me most, however. You were very dear to Bertram,
Linda. This double and treble sorrow of his appalls me." Linda saw
her companion's eyes fill. "You are right," added Mrs. Porter, not
very steadily, "we would better not talk about it at present. Better
thoughts will come now that, as you say, the clouds have cleared
sufficiently for you to think."
They both leaned back against the rock for a silent minute and Linda
saw her friend press her handkerchief to those brimming eyes. Tears and
Mrs. Porter! Impossible connection of thought.
"I would like you to tell me one thing, Mrs. Porter," she said. "Are
you pitying Bertram, or me?"
The older woman turned to her with a sudden flashing smile.
"I am not going to pity the devil in any form," she returned, "because
there ain't no sech animal. All this discord is no part of the reality
of things."
Linda frowned in her earnestness and grasped her friend's arm.
"I know all that you have written me by heart too. I'm trying to
believe in God; but even if I do, that stupendous fact arises--He took
my father away from me."
"No, little Linda"--Mrs. Porter shook her head slowly. "This world is
very full of awful happenings at the present day. Mankind is confronted
with the choice between a God of Love or none at all. Love doesn't send
war and unspeakable suffering, yet such is existing now in this mortal
life of ours. Aren't we reduced to finding some philosophy which will
give us an anchor? The arbitrary will of a God of war is no anchor of
hope. It would be a cause for apprehension--even terror--to believe
in such a power. To come to your own individual loss, your father has
gone from your sight like thousands of other girls' fathers, dead on
battle-fields; but God, who created man in His image and likeness,
knows nothing but the unbroken current of life."
"Then, why--where do all these awful things come from? What is the
source?"
Mrs. Porter smiled. "Where does darkness come from? Did you ever think
of trying to trace darkness to its source? Every minute of the day we
are called upon to divide between reality and unreality."
Silence fell between the two friends in the wide sweep of peace that
surrounded them. The heaped foam of cloudlets sailed across the blue
and a crow cawed in the neighboring wood.
"We had such an amusing visit this morning, Miss Barry and I," said
Mrs. Porter at last. "One of the neighbors is a character."
"I heard that you went to see her hens."
"Yes. Oh, it is funny to see your aunt brought up against the kind of
person who lives in a lax, slipshod sort of way."
"Yes," assented the other; "Aunt Belinda has no half-tones. Everything
with her is either jet-black or snow-white; and if there is anything
she can't bear it is a thing she doesn't like."
Mrs. Porter smiled and sighed. "That is true; and poor Luella Benslow
is such a mixture of airy affectation and slack housekeeping that
Miss Barry is obviously on the eve of explosion all the time they are
together. Her hens are her fad, and she has hot-water bags for them,
Linda. Can you believe it! She puts them in the nests during a cold
snap." Mrs. Porter's laugh rang out as merrily as though sorrow had
never entered the world.
Linda smiled. "Blanche Aurora told me so. It seems that the ingenious
lady belongs to a very talented family."
"Really? In what way?"
"You must get Blanche Aurora to tell you that. I couldn't do the
subject justice."
"Well, I'm afraid it isn't a talent for cooking. Luella has a couple of
boarders; a Mrs. Lindsay and her daughter from New York. Fortunately,
they have a sense of humor. It's quite necessary that Luella's
boarders should have a sense of humor. Mrs. Lindsay walked with us
to the gate when we came away and told us some of their trials; but
she is one of those efficient women who are capable of managing, and
she and her daughter have funny times. It seems that Miss Lindsay has
just been enjoying her first winter in society and has overdone it
so greatly that the doctor ordered a dry-land sea voyage, like this,
in an uninhabited spot like this, and told her to live the life of a
vegetable. Mrs. Lindsay is one of these thin, snappy women, strung on
wires, and I judge nervous to a degree. She has a busy time trying to
dominate the circumstances. She says if they only were vegetables and
didn't have to eat, or to care whether their rooms were swept, it
would all be quite simple. The daughter is rather skin-and-bone-y too;
but she's the sort who would look smart even in bed. You can see that
she is a New Yorker of the New Yorkers."
"Oh, why did you visit them, dear Mrs. Porter! You want to get away
from people too, don't you?"
"No danger, I fancy, of their troubling us. Vegetables don't return
calls. Mrs. Lindsay was very much interested, though, in knowing that
you were here. She and her husband dined with your father last June,
and they are related distantly to that friend of yours--Mr. Whitcomb."
"Fred?"
"Yes; Mrs. Lindsay said he had told them a great deal about you. Isn't
the world small!"
"Too small," sighed Linda. "I hope they'll not try to see me."
"Miss Lindsay was quite lackadaisical and seemed to have no interest
beyond her hammock; and I can easily defend you from the mother," said
Mrs. Porter reassuringly.
That evening Linda received a letter from her sister.
_Dear, dear Linda_ (it began)--
I can hardly wait for the word that will tell us that you are
safely at your journey's end. You had such a hot trip; I hope you
bore it well. I'm sure the good news Bertram sent by letter helped
wonderfully. If Bertram has any sin of commission on his conscience,
he has done all he could to make up for it. He looks so badly.
I wonder, at times, if he worries at night over misleading Papa
instead of sleeping; but Henry says he has had a lot to do nights,
beside worrying or sleeping either. Henry thinks Bertram is one in
a thousand, even if he has made mistakes. He came to us the evening
of the day you went away--it's such a blessed thing Henry wasn't an
investor in the Antlers, because it does away with embarrassment--and
he told us what he has accomplished for Barry & Co. He didn't express
any regrets,--sometimes I think it's strange that he never does,--but
he just told us, in a rather light way, the arrangements he has made
and I assure you Henry shook hands with him hard. I could see that
if he had been a girl he would have hugged him. So I hope that as
you grow stronger you can see things more temperately and come to
the place where you can write a letter of acknowledgment to Bertram.
He deserves it, Linda; he really does. I referred to you once in our
talk, but he made no response and I could feel my very ears burning.
He knew, and I knew, that we were both thinking of that moment in the
library when you rose and left us. You mustn't think I blame you too
much, dear, but remember, to err is human--to forgive, divine, and
Bertram was young for such heavy responsibilities. If he made mistakes
which in any way hastened dear Papa's end, can't you see he will carry
the scars forever? We don't need to add to his punishment.
Harry is standing by me, and ) ) ) there, he made those
wiggles. He says they are his love. He has grown a lot since you saw
him, etc., etc., etc.
* * * * *
Linda could not keep her mind on Harry. She was standing in the
living-room reading her letter by the twilight, and she looked up now
far across the ocean. The darkness fell while she stood there and a
great planet began to ascend the sky. Its brilliancy sent a narrow
path across the sea. The isolation and peace were healing. A great
thankfulness filled the girl that she was far from those scenes called
up by her sister's letter. She wished fervently that she need never
return to them. Here was peace: consolation: relief.