Emily's Husband

Emily Fair got out of Hiram Jameson's waggon at the gate. She took her

satchel and parasol and, in her clear, musical tones, thanked him for

bringing her home. Emily had a very distinctive voice. It was very

sweet always and very cold generally; sometimes it softened to

tenderness with those she loved, but in it there was always an

undertone of inflexibility and reserve. Nobody had ever heard Emily

Fair's voice tremble.

"You are more than welcome, Mrs. Fair," said Hiram Jameson, with a

glance of bold admiration. Emily met it with an unflinching

indifference. She disliked Hiram Jameson. She had been furious under

all her external composure because he had been at the station when she

left the train.

Jameson perceived her scorn, but chose to disregard it.

"Proud as Lucifer," he thought as he drove away. "Well, she's none the

worse of that. I don't like your weak women--they're always sly. If

Stephen Fair don't get better she'll be free and then--"

He did not round out the thought, but he gloated over the memory of

Emily, standing by the gate in the harsh, crude light of the autumn

sunset, with her tawny, brown hair curling about her pale, oval face

and the scornful glint in her large, dark-grey eyes.

Emily stood at the gate for some time after Jameson's waggon had

disappeared. When the brief burst of sunset splendour had faded out

she turned and went into the garden where late asters and

chrysanthemums still bloomed. She gathered some of the more perfect

ones here and there. She loved flowers, but to-night the asters

seemed to hurt her, for she presently dropped those she had gathered

and deliberately set her foot on them.

A sudden gust of wind came over the brown, sodden fields and the

ragged maples around the garden writhed and wailed. The air was raw

and chill. The rain that had threatened all day was very near. Emily

shivered and went into the house.

Amelia Phillips was bending over the fire. She came forward and took

Emily's parcels and wraps with a certain gentleness that sat oddly on

her grim personality.

"Are you tired? I'm glad you're back. Did you walk from the station?"

"No. Hiram Jameson was there and offered to drive me home. I'd rather

have walked. It's going to be a storm, I think. Where is John?"

"He went to the village after supper," answered Amelia, lighting a

lamp. "We needed some things from the store."

The light flared up as she spoke and brought out her strong, almost

harsh features and deep-set black eyes. Amelia Phillips looked like an

overdone sketch in charcoal.

"Has anything happened in Woodford while I've been away?" asked Emily

indifferently. Plainly she did not expect an affirmative answer.

Woodford life was not eventful.

Amelia glanced at her sharply. So she had not heard! Amelia had

expected that Hiram Jameson would have told her. She wished that he

had, for she never felt sure of Emily. The older sister knew that

beneath that surface reserve was a passionate nature, brooking no

restraint when once it overleaped the bounds of her Puritan

self-control. Amelia Phillips, with all her naturally keen insight and

her acquired knowledge of Emily's character, had never been able to

fathom the latter's attitude of mind towards her husband. From the

time that Emily had come back to her girlhood's home, five years

before, Stephen Fair's name had never crossed her lips.

"I suppose you haven't heard that Stephen is very ill," said Amelia

slowly.

Not a feature of Emily's face changed. Only in her voice when she

spoke was a curious jarring, as if a false note had been struck in a

silver melody.

"What is the matter with him?"

"Typhoid," answered Amelia briefly. She felt relieved that Emily had

taken it so calmly. Amelia hated Stephen Fair with all the intensity

of her nature because she believed that he had treated Emily ill, but

she had always been distrustful that Emily in her heart of hearts

loved her husband still. That, in Amelia Phillips' opinion, would have

betrayed a weakness not to be tolerated.

Emily looked at the lamp unwinkingly.

"That wick needs trimming," she said. Then, with a sudden recurrence

of the untuneful note:

"Is he dangerously ill?"

"We haven't heard for three days. The doctors were not anxious about

him Monday, though they said it was a pretty severe case."

A faint, wraith-like change of expression drifted over Emily's

beautiful face and was gone in a moment. What was it--relief? Regret?

It would have been impossible to say. When she next spoke her vibrant

voice was as perfectly melodious as usual.

"I think I will go to bed, Amelia. John will not be back until late I

suppose, and I am very tired. There comes the rain. I suppose it will

spoil all the flowers. They will be beaten to pieces."

In the dark hall Emily paused for a moment and opened the front door

to be cut in the face with a whip-like dash of rain. She peered out

into the thickly gathering gloom. Beyond, in the garden, she saw the

asters tossed about, phantom-like. The wind around the many-cornered

old farmhouse was full of wails and sobs.

The clock in the sitting-room struck eight. Emily shivered and shut

the door. She remembered that she had been married at eight o'clock

that very morning seven years ago. She thought she could see herself

coming down the stairs in her white dress with her bouquet of asters.

For a moment she was glad that those mocking flowers in the garden

would be all beaten to death before morning by the lash of wind and

rain.

Then she recovered her mental poise and put the hateful memories away

from her as she went steadily up the narrow stairs and along the hall

with its curious slant as the house had settled, to her own room under

the north-western eaves.

When she had put out her light and gone to bed she found that she

could not sleep. She pretended to believe that it was the noise of the

storm that kept her awake. Not even to herself would Emily confess

that she was waiting and listening nervously for John's return home.

That would have been to admit a weakness, and Emily Fair, like Amelia,

despised weakness.

Every few minutes a gust of wind smote the house, with a roar as of a

wild beast, and bombarded Emily's window with a volley of rattling

drops. In the silences that came between the gusts she heard the soft,

steady pouring of the rain on the garden paths below, mingled with a

faint murmur that came up from the creek beyond the barns where the

pine boughs were thrashing in the storm. Emily suddenly thought of a

weird story she had once read years before and long forgotten--a story

of a soul that went out in a night of storm and blackness and lost its

way between earth and heaven. She shuddered and drew the counterpane

over her face.

"Of all things I hate a fall storm most," she muttered. "It frightens

me."

Somewhat to her surprise--for even her thoughts were generally well

under the control of her unbending will--she could not help thinking

of Stephen--thinking of him not tenderly or remorsefully, but

impersonally, as of a man who counted for nothing in her life. It was

so strange to think of Stephen being ill. She had never known him to

have a day's sickness in his life before. She looked back over her

life much as if she were glancing with a chill interest at a series of

pictures which in no way concerned her. Scene after scene, face after

face, flashed out on the background of the darkness.

Emily's mother had died at her birth, but Amelia Phillips, twenty

years older than the baby sister, had filled the vacant place so well

and with such intuitive tenderness that Emily had never been conscious

of missing a mother. John Phillips, too, the grave, silent, elder

brother, loved and petted the child. Woodford people were fond of

saying that John and Amelia spoiled Emily shamefully.

Emily Phillips had never been like the other Woodford girls and had no

friends of her own age among them. Her uncommon beauty won her many

lovers, but she had never cared for any of them until Stephen Fair,

fifteen years her senior, had come a-wooing to the old, gray,

willow-girdled Phillips homestead.

Amelia and John Phillips never liked him. There was an ancient feud

between the families that had died out among the younger generation,

but was still potent with the older.

From the first Emily had loved Stephen. Indeed, deep down in her

strange, wayward heart, she had cared for him long before the

memorable day when he had first looked at her with seeing eyes and

realized that the quiet, unthought-of child who had been growing up at

the old Phillips place had blossomed out into a woman of strange,

seraph-like beauty and deep grey eyes whose expression was nevermore

to go out of Stephen Fair's remembrance from then till the day of his

death.

John and Amelia Phillips put their own unjustifiable dislike of

Stephen aside when they found that Emily's heart was set on him. The

two were married after a brief courtship and Emily went out from her

girlhood's home to the Fair homestead, two miles away.

Stephen's mother lived with them. Janet Fair had never liked Emily.

She had not been willing for Stephen to marry her. But, apart from

this, the woman had a natural, ineradicable love of making mischief

and took a keen pleasure in it. She loved her son and she had loved

her husband, but nevertheless, when Thomas Fair had been alive she had

fomented continual strife and discontent between him and Stephen. Now

it became her pleasure to make what trouble she could between Stephen

and his wife.

She had the advantage of Emily in that she was always sweet-spoken

and, on the surface, sweet-tempered. Emily, hurt and galled in a score

of petty ways, so subtle that they were beyond a man's courser

comprehension, astonished her husband by her fierce outbursts of anger

that seemed to him for the most part without reason or excuse. He

tried his best to preserve the peace between his wife and mother; and

when he failed, not understanding all that Emily really endured at the

elder woman's merciless hands, he grew to think her capricious and

easily irritated--a spoiled child whose whims must not be taken too

seriously.

To a certain extent he was right. Emily had been spoiled. The unbroken

indulgence which her brother and sister had always accorded her had

fitted her but poorly to cope with the trials of her new life. True,

Mrs. Fair was an unpleasant woman to live with, but if Emily had

chosen to be more patient under petty insults, and less resentful of

her husband's well-meant though clumsy efforts for harmony, the older

woman could have effected real little mischief. But this Emily refused

to be, and the breach between husband and wife widened insidiously.

The final rupture came two years after their marriage. Emily, in

rebellious anger, told her husband that she would no longer live in

the same house with his mother.

"You must choose between us," she said, her splendid voice vibrating

with all the unleashed emotion of her being, yet with no faltering in

it. "If she stays I go."

Stephen Fair, harassed and bewildered, was angry with the relentless

anger of a patient man roused at last.

"Go, then," he said sternly, "I'll never turn my mother from my door

for any woman's whim."

The stormy red went out of Emily's face, leaving it like a marble

wash.

"You mean that!" she said calmly. "Think well. If I go I'll never

return."

"I do mean it," said Stephen. "Leave my house if you will--if you hold

your marriage vow so lightly. When your senses return you are welcome

to come back to me. I will never ask you to."

Without another word Emily turned away. That night she went back to

John and Amelia. They, on their part, welcomed her back gladly,

believing her to be a wronged and ill-used woman. They hated Stephen

Fair with a new and personal rancour. The one thing they could hardly

have forgiven Emily would have been the fact of her relenting towards

him.

But she did not relent. In her soul she knew that, with all her just

grievances, she had been in the wrong, and for that she could not

forgive him!

Two years after she had left Stephen Mrs. Fair died, and his widowed

sister-in-law went to keep house for him. If he thought of Emily he

made no sign. Stephen Fair never broke a word once passed.

Since their separation no greeting or look had ever passed between

husband and wife. When they met, as they occasionally did, neither

impassive face changed. Emily Fair had buried her love deeply. In her

pride and anger she would not let herself remember even where she had

dug its grave.

And now Stephen was ill. The strange woman felt a certain pride in her

own inflexibility because the fact did not affect her. She told

herself that she could not have felt more unconcerned had he been the

merest stranger. Nevertheless she waited and watched for John

Phillips' homecoming.

At ten o'clock she heard his voice in the kitchen. She leaned out of

the bed and pulled open her door. She heard voices below, but could

not distinguish the words, so she rose and went noiselessly out into

the hall, knelt down by the stair railing and listened. The door of

the kitchen was open below her and a narrow shaft of light struck on

her white, intent face. She looked like a woman waiting for the decree

of doom.

At first John and Amelia talked of trivial matters. Then the latter

said abruptly:

"Did you hear how Stephen Fair was?"

"He's dying," was the brief response.

Emily heard Amelia's startled exclamation. She gripped the square

rails with her hands until the sharp edges dinted deep into her

fingers. John's voice came up to her again, harsh and expressionless:

"He took a bad turn the day before yesterday and has been getting

worse ever since. The doctors don't expect him to live till morning."

Amelia began to talk rapidly in low tones. Emily heard nothing

further. She got up and went blindly back into her room with such

agony tearing at her heartstrings that she dully wondered why she

could not shriek aloud.

Stephen--her husband--dying! In the burning anguish of that moment her

own soul was as an open book before her. The love she had buried rose

from the deeps of her being in an awful, accusing resurrection.

Out of her stupor and pain a purpose formed itself clearly. She must

go to Stephen--she must beg and win his forgiveness before it was too

late. She dared not go down to John and ask him to take her to her

husband. He might refuse. The Phillipses had been known to do even

harder things than that. At the best there would be a storm of protest

and objection on her brother's and sister's part, and Emily felt that

she could not encounter that in her present mood. It would drive her

mad.

She lit a lamp and dressed herself noiselessly, but with feverish

haste. Then she listened. The house was very still. Amelia and John

had gone to bed. She wrapped herself in a heavy woollen shawl hanging

in the hall and crept downstairs. With numbed fingers she fumbled at

the key of the hall door, turned it and slipped out into the night.

The storm seemed to reach out and clutch her and swallow her up. She

went through the garden, where the flowers already were crushed to

earth; she crossed the long field beyond, where the rain cut her face

like a whip and the wind almost twisted her in its grasp like a broken

reed. Somehow or other, more by blind instinct than anything else, she

found the path that led through commons and woods and waste valleys to

her lost home.

In after years that frenzied walk through the storm and blackness

seemed as an unbroken nightmare to Emily Fair's recollection. Often

she fell. Once as she did so a jagged, dead limb of fir struck her

forehead and cut in it a gash that marked her for life. As she

struggled to her feet and found her way again the blood trickled down

over her face.

"Oh God, don't let him die before I get to him--don't--don't--don't!"

she prayed desperately with more of defiance than entreaty in her

voice. Then, realizing this, she cried out in horror. Surely some

fearsome punishment would come upon her for her wickedness--she would

find her husband lying dead.

When Emily opened the kitchen door of the Fair homestead Almira

Sentner cried out in her alarm, who or what was this creature with the

white face and wild eyes, with her torn and dripping garments and

dishevelled, wind-writhen hair and the big drops of blood slowly

trickling from her brow?

The next moment she recognized Emily and her face hardened. This

woman, Stephen's sister-in-law, had always hated Emily Fair.

"What do you want here?" she said harshly.

"Where is my husband?" asked Emily.

"You can't see him," said Mrs. Sentner defiantly. "The doctors won't

allow anyone in the room but those he's used to. Strangers excite

him."

The insolence and cruelty of her speech fell on unheeding ears. Emily,

understanding only that her husband yet lived, turned to the hall

door.

"Stand back!" she said in a voice that was little more than a

thrilling whisper, but which yet had in it something that cowed Almira

Sentner's malice. Sullenly she stood aside and Emily went unhindered

up the stairs to the room where the sick man lay.

The two doctors in attendance were there, together with the trained

nurse from the city. Emily pushed them aside and fell on her knees by

the bed. One of the doctors made a hasty motion as if to draw her

back, but the other checked him.

"It doesn't matter now," he said significantly.

Stephen Fair turned his languid, unshorn head on the pillow. His dull,

fevered eyes met Emily's. He had not recognized anyone all day, but he

knew his wife.

"Emily!" he whispered.

Emily drew his head close to her face and kissed his lips

passionately.

"Stephen, I've come back to you. Forgive me--forgive me--say that you

forgive me."

"It's all right, my girl," he said feebly.

She buried her face in the pillow beside his with a sob.

In the wan, grey light of the autumn dawn the old doctor came to the

bedside and lifted Emily to her feet. She had not stirred the whole

night. Now she raised her white face with dumb pleading in her eyes.

The doctor glanced at the sleeping form on the bed.

"Your husband will live, Mrs. Fair," he said gently. "I think your

coming saved him. His joy turned the ebbing tide in favour of life."

"Thank God!" said Emily.

And for the first time in her life her beautiful voice trembled.

Lucy Maud Montgomery Short Stories, 1902 to 1903 · 第 16 / 33 题