“What am de matter, Rastus? Ketch cold?”
“Yeah, purty bad, too.”
“How come?”
“Ya know, I put mah bed out in de yard, and doggone if Ah didn’t go to
bed las’ night wiff de gate open.”
* * * * *
The head that is loaded with wisdom doesn’t leak at the mouth.
* * * * *
Debt is a trap which a man sets and baits for him self and then
deliberately falls into.
_Arthur Neale’s Page_
I wish to assure the readers of Captain William’s Whiz Bang that what we
stand for is one country, one flag, one language and one-piece bathing
suits.
* * * * *
_’Cause what looks so cute_
_As a nice bathing suit—_
_Provided inside it_
_The girl is a beaut?_
* * * * *
We notice the Very Rev. “Golightly” Morrill says: “At Puerto Cabello one
goes in swimming au natural. The guide-book says: ‘The natural beauties
of the place are charming.’” That settles it! Puerto Cabello is where we
spend the vacation!
* * * * *
_We heard someone say: “I do admire Art”;_
_We blushed as we thought of our striving,_
_But the next thing they said was a stab to the heart._
_’Twas: “Look! She’s so graceful when diving.”_
* * * * *
Every year the bathing regulations grow stricter. If Gus, the hired man,
read the ones for Coney Island this year we think he’d say they wear
more in the sea than they do on the sidewalk.
* * * * *
_Miss Venus, as perhaps you know,_
_Had lost her pair of arms;_
_It didn’t matter to her beau,_
_The gal had other charms._
* * * * *
As the refined woman single in vaudeville said: “I may be no riot—but
thank God, I’m satisfied.”
* * * * *
Our friends in the song-writing game will be interested to learn that we
are now at work on a snappy little one-step entitled: “When Adam Said
‘Eve, You’re a Naughty Little Girl.’ She said: ‘Well, I don’t care A
dam.’”
* * * * *