Half-stunned, confused, and wondering, Vane Lee awoke to the fact that
he really was lying upon the carpet at the side of his bed, and for a
few moments, he felt that he must have fallen out; but, in an indistinct
fashion, he began to realise that he had heard a tremendous noise in his
sleep, and started so violently that he had rather thrown himself than
fallen out of bed, while to prove to him that there was something
terribly wrong, there were loud shrieks from the lower part of the
house, and from the passage came his uncle's voice.
"Vane, my lad, quick! jump up!"
"It's an earthquake," panted Vane, as he hurried on his clothes,
listening the while with fear and trembling, to the screams which still
rose at intervals from below.
"That's Eliza's voice," he thought, and directly after as he waited,
full of excitement, for the next shock, and the crumbling down of the
house, "That's cook."
Almost at the same moment a peculiar odour came creeping in beneath and
round the door; and Vane, as he forced a reluctant button through the
corresponding hole with fumbling fingers took a long sniff.
"'Tisn't an earthquake," he thought; "that's gunpowder!"
The next moment, after trying to think of what gunpowder there was on
the premises, and unable to recall any, he was for attributing the
explosion, for such he felt it to be, to some of the chemicals in the
laboratory.
That idea he quickly dismissed, for the screams were from the kitchen,
and he was coming round to the earthquake theory again, when a thought
flashed through his brain, and he cried aloud in triumph, just as the
doctor threw open his door:--
"It is gunpowder."
"Smells like it, boy," cried the doctor, excitedly, "but I had none.
Had you?"
"No, uncle," cried Vane, as a fresh burst of screaming, arose; "but it's
cook. She has been blowing up the copper hole to make the fire draw."
"Come along! That's it!" cried the doctor. "Stupid woman! I hope she
is not much burned."
This all took place as they were hurrying down into the hall, where the
odour was stifling now: that dank, offensive, hydrogenous smell which is
pretty familiar to most people, and as they hurried on to the kitchen
from which the cries for help came more faintly now, they entered upon a
dimly-seen chaos of bricks, mortar, broken crockery, and upset kitchen
furniture.
"A pound of powder at least," cried the doctor, who then began to sneeze
violently, the place being full of steam, and dust caused by the ceiling
having been pretty well stripped of plaster. "Here, cook--Eliza--where
are you?"
"Oh, master, master, master!"
"Help!--help!--help!"
Two wild appeals for aid from the back kitchen, where the copper was
set, and into which uncle and nephew hurried, expecting to find the two
maids half buried in _debris_. But, to the surprise of both, that
office was quite unharmed, and cook was seated in a big Windsor chair,
sobbing hysterically, while Eliza was on the floor, screaming faintly
with her apron held over her face.
"How could you be so foolish!--how much powder?--where did you get it?--
where are you hurt?" rattled out the doctor breathlessly.
"Anything the matter, cook?" said Bruff, coming to the door.
"Matter? Yes," cried the doctor, growing cool again. "Here, help me
lift Eliza into a chair."
"No, no, don't touch me; I shall fall to pieces," sobbed the maid
wildly.
"Nonsense! Here, let me see where you are hurt," continued the doctor,
as Eliza was lifted carefully.
"Oh, Master Vane--oh, Master Vane! Is it the end of the world?" groaned
cook, as the lad took one of her hands, and asked her where she was
injured.
"No, no," cried Vane. "Tell me where you are harmed."
"I don't know--I don't know--I don't know," moaned the trembling woman,
beginning in a very high tone and ending very low. "It's all over--It's
all over now."
"Give her water," said the doctor. "She's hysterical. Here, cook," he
cried sternly, "how came you to bring powder into the house?"
"I don't know--I don't know--I don't know," moaned the trembling woman.
"Oh, master, give me something. Don't let me die just yet."
"Die! nonsense!" cried the doctor. "Be quiet, Eliza. Hang it, women, I
can't do anything if you cry out like this. Wherever are you hurt?
You, Eliza, speak."
His firm way had its effect; and as Bruff and Vane stood looking on, the
maid faltered:--
"I was a-doing the breakfast-room, sir, when it went off; and, soon as I
heered cook scream, I tried to get to her, but had to go round by the
back."
"Did you know she was going to blow up the copper hole with gunpowder?"
"No, sir. Last time I see her, she was lighting the kitchen-fire."
"What!" yelled Vane.
"Yes, sir," cried cook, sitting up suddenly, and speaking indignantly:
"and I won't stop another day in a house where such games is allowed.
I'd got a good fire by half-past six, and was busy in the back kitchen
when it went off. Me get powder to blow up copper holes? I scorn the
very idee of it, sir. It's that master Vane put powder among the coals
to play me a trick."
"I didn't," cried Vane.
"Don't say that, sir," interposed Bruff, "why, I see the greenhouse
chockfull o' smoke as I come by."
Vane had turned quite cold, and was staring at his uncle, while his
uncle with his face full of chagrin and perplexity was staring at him.
"You've done it this time, my boy," said the doctor, sadly.
"Is anybody killed?--is anybody killed?" cried Aunt Hannah from the
hall. "I can't come through the kitchen. My dear Vane! oh, do speak."
"No one hurt," shouted the doctor. "Come, Vane."
He led the way through the shattered kitchen, which was a perfect wreck;
but before he could reach the hall, Vane had passed him.
"Aunt! Aunt!" he cried; "did you tell cook not to light the
kitchen-fire?"
"Oh, dear me!" cried Aunt Hannah; "what a head I have. I meant to, but
I quite forgot."
There was silence in the hall for a few moments, only broken by a sob or
two from the back kitchen. Then Aunt Hannah spoke again.
"Oh, I am so sorry, my dear. But is anybody very badly hurt?"
"Yes," said the doctor, dryly. "Vane is--very."
"My dear, my dear! Where?" cried Aunt Hannah, catching the lad by the
arm.
"Only in his _amour propre_" said the doctor, and Vane ran out of the
hall and through the front door to get round to the greenhouse, but as
he opened the door of the glass building the doctor overtook him, and
they entered in silence, each looking round eagerly for the mischief
done.
Here it was not serious: some panes of glass were broken, and two or
three pipes nearest to the wall were blown out of their places; but
there was the cause of all mischief, the two taps in the small tubes
which connected the flow and return pipes were turned off, with the
consequence, that there was no escape for the steam, and the closed
boiler had of course exploded as soon as sufficient steam had generated,
with the consequences seen.
"Pretty engineer you are, sir," cried the doctor, "to have both those
stop-cocks turned."
"There ought not to have been a second one, uncle," said Vane dolefully.
"I let them get the better of me yesterday, and put in the second. If
it had not been for that, one pipe would have been always open, and
there could have been no explosion."
"Humph! I see," said the doctor.
"But I ought to have left them turned on, and I should have done so,
only I did not think that there was going to be any fire this morning."
"Here, come back, and let's see the extent of the mischief in the
kitchen. That piece of new wall is blown out, you see."
He pointed to the loose bricks and mortar thrust out into quite a bow;
and then they walked sadly back into the house, where cook's voice could
be heard scolding volubly, mingled with Aunt Hannah's milder tones,
though the latter could hardly be heard as they entered the devastated
kitchen, from which the smoke and dust had now pretty well disappeared,
making the damage plain to see. And very plain it was: the new boiler
stood in front of the grate, with a hole ripped in one side, the wrought
iron being forced out by the power of the steam, just as if it had been
composed of paper; the kitchen range was broken, and the crockery on the
dresser exactly opposite to the fireplace looked as if it had been swept
from the shelves and smashed upon the floor. Chairs were overturned;
the table was lying upon its side; tins, coppers, graters, spoons and
ladles were here, there, and everywhere. The clock had stopped, and the
culinary implements that ornamented the kitchen chimney-piece had
evidently flown up to the ceiling. In short, scarcely a thing in the
place had escaped some damage, while dust and fragments of plaster
covered every object, and the only witness of the explosion, the cat,
which had somehow been sheltered and escaped unhurt, was standing on the
top of the cupboard, with its eyes glowering and its tail standing
straight up, feathered out like a plume.
"Oh, my dear, my dear, what a scene!" cried Aunt Hannah, piteously.
"Vane must never perform any more experiments here."
She had just come to the back kitchen-door, and was looking in.
"Oh, Aunt! Aunt!" cried Vane.
"All very well to blame the poor boy," said the doctor with mock
severity. "It was your doing entirely."
"Mine, Thomas!" faltered Aunt Hannah.
"Of course it was. You were told not to have the kitchen-fire lit."
"Yes--yes," wailed Aunt Hannah; "and I forgot it."
"It was not only that, Aunt, dear," said Vane, going to her side, and
taking her hand. "It was my unlucky experiment was the principal
cause."
"Not another day, Eliza," came from the back kitchen. "No, no, not if
they went down on their bended knees and begged me to stop."
"What, amongst all this broken crockery?" cried the doctor. "Hold your
tongue, you stupid woman, and send Bruff to ask his wife to come and
help clear up all this mess."
Cook, invisible in the back, uttered a defiant snort.
"Ah!" shouted the doctor. "Am I master here. See to a fire there at
once, and I should like one of those delicious omelettes for my
breakfast, cook. Let's have breakfast as soon as you can. There, no
more words. Let's be very thankful that you were neither of you badly
scalded. You heard what I said, Bruff?"
"Yes, sir, of course."
"Then go and fetch your wife directly. Cook will give you some
breakfast here."
Bruff scurried off, and Eliza entered the kitchen, wiping her eyes.
"Bit of a fright for you, eh, my girl?" said the doctor, taking her
hand, and feeling her pulse. "Well done! Brave little woman. You are
as calm as can be again. You're not going to run away at a moment's
notice."
"Oh, no, sir," cried Eliza eagerly.
"Nor cook neither," said the doctor aloud. "She's too fond of us to go
when we are in such a state as this."
There was a sniff now from the back kitchen and the doctor gave Vane a
humorous look, as much as to say, "I can manage cook better than your
aunt."
"There, my dear," he said, "it's of no use for you to cry over spilt
milk. Better milk the cow again and be more careful. See what is
broken by and by, and then come to me for a cheque. Vane, my boy, send
a letter up at once for another boiler."
"But surely, dear--" began Aunt Hannah.
"I am not about to have the boiler set there again? Indeed I am. Vane
is not going to be beaten because we have had an accident through
trusting others to do what we ought to have done for ourselves. There,
come and let's finish dressing; and cook!"
"Yes, sir," came very mildly from the back kitchen, in company with the
crackling of freshly-lit wood.
"You'll hurry the breakfast all you can."
"Yes, sir."
"Don't feel any the worse now, do you?"
"No, sir, only a little ketchy about the throat."
"Oh, I'll prescribe for that."
"Thank you, sir, but it will be better directly," said cook hastily.
"After you've taken my dose, make yourself a good strong cup of tea.
Come along, my dear. Now, Vane, your face wants washing horribly, my
boy. Hannah, my dear, you understand now the tremendous force of
steam."
"Yes, my dear," said Aunt Hannah, sorrowfully. "I do indeed."
"And if ever in the future you see anyone sitting upon the safety valve
to get up speed, don't hesitate for a moment, go and knock him off."
"My dear Thomas," said Aunt Hannah, dolefully, "this is no subject for
mirth."
"Eh? Isn't it? I think it is. Why, some of us might have been scalded
to death, and we have all escaped. Don't you call that a cause for
rejoicing? What do you say, Vane?"
"I say, sir, that I shall never forgive myself," replied the lad sadly.
"Not your place, Weathercock, but mine, and your aunt's. I'll forgive
you freely, and as for your aunt, she can't help it because she was
partly to blame."