CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

TOM PINCH, GOING ASTRAY, FINDS THAT HE IS NOT THE ONLY PERSON IN THAT

PREDICAMENT. HE RETALIATES UPON A FALLEN FOE

Tom’s evil genius did not lead him into the dens of any of those

preparers of cannibalic pastry, who are represented in many standard

country legends as doing a lively retail business in the Metropolis;

nor did it mark him out as the prey of ring-droppers, pea and

thimble-riggers, duffers, touters, or any of those bloodless sharpers,

who are, perhaps, a little better known to the Police. He fell into

conversation with no gentleman who took him into a public-house, where

there happened to be another gentleman who swore he had more money than

any gentleman, and very soon proved he had more money than one gentleman

by taking his away from him; neither did he fall into any other of

the numerous man-traps which are set up without notice, in the public

grounds of this city. But he lost his way. He very soon did that; and in

trying to find it again he lost it more and more.

Now, Tom, in his guileless distrust of London, thought himself very

knowing in coming to the determination that he would not ask to be

directed to Furnival’s Inn, if he could help it; unless, indeed, he

should happen to find himself near the Mint, or the Bank of England; in

which case he would step in, and ask a civil question or two, confiding

in the perfect respectability of the concern. So on he went, looking up

all the streets he came near, and going up half of them; and thus,

by dint of not being true to Goswell Street, and filing off into

Aldermanbury, and bewildering himself in Barbican, and being constant to

the wrong point of the compass in London Wall, and then getting himself

crosswise into Thames Street, by an instinct that would have been

marvellous if he had had the least desire or reason to go there, he

found himself, at last, hard by the Monument.

The Man in the Monument was quite as mysterious a being to Tom as the

Man in the Moon. It immediately occurred to him that the lonely creature

who held himself aloof from all mankind in that pillar like some old

hermit was the very man of whom to ask his way. Cold, he might be;

little sympathy he had, perhaps, with human passion--the column seemed

too tall for that; but if Truth didn’t live in the base of the Monument,

notwithstanding Pope’s couplet about the outside of it, where in London

(thought Tom) was she likely to be found!

Coming close below the pillar, it was a great encouragement to Tom to

find that the Man in the Monument had simple tastes; that stony

and artificial as his residence was, he still preserved some rustic

recollections; that he liked plants, hung up bird-cages, was not wholly

cut off from fresh groundsel, and kept young trees in tubs. The Man in

the Monument, himself, was sitting outside the door--his own door: the

Monument-door: what a grand idea!--and was actually yawning, as if there

were no Monument to stop his mouth, and give him a perpetual interest in

his own existence.

Tom was advancing towards this remarkable creature, to inquire the way

to Furnival’s Inn, when two people came to see the Monument. They were a

gentleman and a lady; and the gentleman said, ‘How much a-piece?’

The Man in the Monument replied, ‘A Tanner.’

It seemed a low expression, compared with the Monument.

The gentleman put a shilling into his hand, and the Man in the Monument

opened a dark little door. When the gentleman and lady had passed out of

view, he shut it again, and came slowly back to his chair.

He sat down and laughed.

‘They don’t know what a many steps there is!’ he said. ‘It’s worth twice

the money to stop here. Oh, my eye!’

The Man in the Monument was a Cynic; a worldly man! Tom couldn’t ask his

way of HIM. He was prepared to put no confidence in anything he said.

‘My gracious!’ cried a well-known voice behind Mr Pinch. ‘Why, to be

sure it is!’

At the same time he was poked in the back by a parasol. Turning round

to inquire into this salute, he beheld the eldest daughter of his late

patron.

‘Miss Pecksniff!’ said Tom.

‘Why, my goodness, Mr Pinch!’ cried Cherry. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I have rather wandered from my way,’ said Tom. ‘I--’

‘I hope you have run away,’ said Charity. ‘It would be quite spirited

and proper if you had, when my Papa so far forgets himself.’

‘I have left him,’ returned Tom. ‘But it was perfectly understood on

both sides. It was not done clandestinely.’

‘Is he married?’ asked Cherry, with a spasmodic shake of her chin.

‘No, not yet,’ said Tom, colouring; ‘to tell you the truth, I don’t

think he is likely to be, if--if Miss Graham is the object of his

passion.’

‘Tcha, Mr Pinch!’ cried Charity, with sharp impatience, ‘you’re very

easily deceived. You don’t know the arts of which such a creature is

capable. Oh! it’s a wicked world.’

‘You are not married?’ Tom hinted, to divert the conversation.

‘N--no!’ said Cherry, tracing out one particular paving-stone in

Monument Yard with the end of her parasol. ‘I--but really it’s quite

impossible to explain. Won’t you walk in?’

‘You live here, then?’ said Tom

‘Yes,’ returned Miss Pecksniff, pointing with her parasol to Todgers’s;

‘I reside with this lady, AT PRESENT.’

The great stress on the two last words suggested to Tom that he was

expected to say something in reference to them. So he said.

‘Only at present! Are you going home again soon?’

‘No, Mr Pinch,’ returned Charity. ‘No, thank you. No! A mother-in-law

who is younger than--I mean to say, who is as nearly as possible about

the same age as one’s self, would not quite suit my spirit. Not quite!’

said Cherry, with a spiteful shiver.

‘I thought from your saying “at present”’--Tom observed.

‘Really, upon my word! I had no idea you would press me so very closely

on the subject, Mr Pinch,’ said Charity, blushing, ‘or I should not have

been so foolish as to allude to--oh really!--won’t you walk in?’

Tom mentioned, to excuse himself, that he had an appointment in

Furnival’s Inn, and that coming from Islington he had taken a few wrong

turnings, and arrived at the Monument instead. Miss Pecksniff simpered

very much when he asked her if she knew the way to Furnival’s Inn, and

at length found courage to reply.

‘A gentleman who is a friend of mine, or at least who is not exactly a

friend so much as a sort of acquaintance--Oh upon my word, I hardly

know what I say, Mr Pinch; you mustn’t suppose there is any engagement

between us; or at least if there is, that it is at all a settled thing

as yet--is going to Furnival’s Inn immediately, I believe upon a little

business, and I am sure he would be very glad to accompany you, so as

to prevent your going wrong again. You had better walk in. You will very

likely find my sister Merry here,’ she said with a curious toss of her

head, and anything but an agreeable smile.

‘Then, I think, I’ll endeavour to find my way alone,’ said Tom, ‘for I

fear she would not be very glad to see me. That unfortunate occurrence,

in relation to which you and I had some amicable words together, in

private, is not likely to have impressed her with any friendly feeling

towards me. Though it really was not my fault.’

‘She has never heard of that, you may depend,’ said Cherry, gathering up

the corners of her mouth, and nodding at Tom. ‘I am far from sure that

she would bear you any mighty ill will for it, if she had.’

‘You don’t say so?’ cried Tom, who was really concerned by this

insinuation.

‘I say nothing,’ said Charity. ‘If I had not already known what shocking

things treachery and deceit are in themselves, Mr Pinch, I might perhaps

have learnt it from the success they meet with--from the success they

meet with.’ Here she smiled as before. ‘But I don’t say anything. On the

contrary, I should scorn it. You had better walk in!’

There was something hidden here, which piqued Tom’s interest and

troubled his tender heart. When, in a moment’s irresolution, he looked

at Charity, he could not but observe a struggle in her face between

a sense of triumph and a sense of shame; nor could he but remark how,

meeting even his eyes, which she cared so little for, she turned away

her own, for all the splenetic defiance in her manner.

An uneasy thought entered Tom’s head; a shadowy misgiving that the

altered relations between himself and Pecksniff were somehow to involve

an altered knowledge on his part of other people, and were to give him

an insight into much of which he had had no previous suspicion. And yet

he put no definite construction upon Charity’s proceedings. He certainly

had no idea that as he had been the audience and spectator of her

mortification, she grasped with eager delight at any opportunity of

reproaching her sister with his presence in HER far deeper misery; for

he knew nothing of it, and only pictured that sister as the same giddy,

careless, trivial creature she always had been, with the same slight

estimation of himself which she had never been at the least pains

to conceal. In short, he had merely a confused impression that Miss

Pecksniff was not quite sisterly or kind; and being curious to set it

right, accompanied her as she desired.

The house-door being opened, she went in before Tom, requesting him to

follow her; and led the way to the parlour door.

‘Oh, Merry!’ she said, looking in, ‘I am so glad you have not gone home.

Who do you think I have met in the street, and brought to see you! Mr

Pinch! There. Now you ARE surprised, I am sure!’

Not more surprised than Tom was, when he looked upon her. Not so much.

Not half so much.

‘Mr Pinch has left Papa, my dear,’ said Cherry, ‘and his prospects are

quite flourishing. I have promised that Augustus, who is going that way,

shall escort him to the place he wants. Augustus, my child, where are

you?’

With these words Miss Pecksniff screamed her way out of the parlour,

calling on Augustus Moddle to appear; and left Tom Pinch alone with her

sister.

If she had always been his kindest friend; if she had treated him

through all his servitude with such consideration as was never yet

received by struggling man; if she had lightened every moment of those

many years, and had ever spared and never wounded him; his honest heart

could not have swelled before her with a deeper pity, or a purer freedom

from all base remembrance than it did then.

‘My gracious me! You are really the last person in the world I should

have thought of seeing, I am sure!’

Tom was sorry to hear her speaking in her old manner. He had not

expected that. Yet he did not feel it a contradiction that he should be

sorry to see her so unlike her old self, and sorry at the same time

to hear her speaking in her old manner. The two things seemed quite

natural.

‘I wonder you find any gratification in coming to see me. I can’t think

what put it in your head. I never had much in seeing you. There was no

love lost between us, Mr Pinch, at any time, I think.’

Her bonnet lay beside her on the sofa, and she was very busy with the

ribbons as she spoke. Much too busy to be conscious of the work her

fingers did.

‘We never quarrelled,’ said Tom.--Tom was right in that, for one person

can no more quarrel without an adversary, than one person can play at

chess, or fight a duel. ‘I hoped you would be glad to shake hands with

an old friend. Don’t let us rake up bygones,’ said Tom. ‘If I ever

offended you, forgive me.’

She looked at him for a moment; dropped her bonnet from her hands;

spread them before her altered face, and burst into tears.

‘Oh, Mr Pinch!’ she said, ‘although I never used you well, I did believe

your nature was forgiving. I did not think you could be cruel.’

She spoke as little like her old self now, for certain, as Tom

could possibly have wished. But she seemed to be appealing to him

reproachfully, and he did not understand her.

‘I seldom showed it--never--I know that. But I had that belief in you,

that if I had been asked to name the person in the world least likely to

retort upon me, I would have named you, confidently.’

‘Would have named me!’ Tom repeated.

‘Yes,’ she said with energy, ‘and I have often thought so.’

After a moment’s reflection, Tom sat himself upon a chair beside her.

‘Do you believe,’ said Tom, ‘oh, can you think, that what I said just

now, I said with any but the true and plain intention which my words

professed? I mean it, in the spirit and the letter. If I ever offended

you, forgive me; I may have done so, many times. You never injured or

offended me. How, then, could I possibly retort, if even I were stern

and bad enough to wish to do it!’

After a little while she thanked him, through her tears and sobs, and

told him she had never been at once so sorry and so comforted, since she

left home. Still she wept bitterly; and it was the greater pain to Tom

to see her weeping, from her standing in especial need, just then, of

sympathy and tenderness.

‘Come, come!’ said Tom, ‘you used to be as cheerful as the day was

long.’

‘Ah! used!’ she cried, in such a tone as rent Tom’s heart.

‘And will be again,’ said Tom.

‘No, never more. No, never, never more. If you should talk with old Mr

Chuzzlewit, at any time,’ she added, looking hurriedly into his face--‘I

sometimes thought he liked you, but suppressed it--will you promise me

to tell him that you saw me here, and that I said I bore in mind the

time we talked together in the churchyard?’

Tom promised that he would.

‘Many times since then, when I have wished I had been carried there

before that day, I have recalled his words. I wish that he should know

how true they were, although the least acknowledgment to that effect has

never passed my lips and never will.’

Tom promised this, conditionally too. He did not tell her how improbable

it was that he and the old man would ever meet again, because he thought

it might disturb her more.

‘If he should ever know this, through your means, dear Mr Pinch,’ said

Mercy, ‘tell him that I sent the message, not for myself, but that he

might be more forbearing and more patient, and more trustful to some

other person, in some other time of need. Tell him that if he could know

how my heart trembled in the balance that day, and what a very little

would have turned the scale, his own would bleed with pity for me.’

‘Yes, yes,’ said Tom, ‘I will.’

‘When I appeared to him the most unworthy of his help, I was--I know I

was, for I have often, often, thought about it since--the most inclined

to yield to what he showed me. Oh! if he had relented but a little more;

if he had thrown himself in my way for but one other quarter of an hour;

if he had extended his compassion for a vain, unthinking, miserable

girl, in but the least degree; he might, and I believe he would, have

saved her! Tell him that I don’t blame him, but am grateful for the

effort that he made; but ask him for the love of God, and youth, and

in merciful consideration for the struggle which an ill-advised and

unwakened nature makes to hide the strength it thinks its weakness--ask

him never, never, to forget this, when he deals with one again!’

Although Tom did not hold the clue to her full meaning, he could guess

it pretty nearly. Touched to the quick, he took her hand and said, or

meant to say, some words of consolation. She felt and understood them,

whether they were spoken or no. He was not quite certain, afterwards,

but that she had tried to kneel down at his feet, and bless him.

He found that he was not alone in the room when she had left it. Mrs

Todgers was there, shaking her head. Tom had never seen Mrs Todgers, it

is needless to say, but he had a perception of her being the lady of the

house; and he saw some genuine compassion in her eyes, that won his good

opinion.

‘Ah, sir! You are an old friend, I see,’ said Mrs Todgers.

‘Yes,’ said Tom.

‘And yet,’ quoth Mrs Todgers, shutting the door softly, ‘she hasn’t told

you what her troubles are, I’m certain.’

Tom was struck by these words, for they were quite true. ‘Indeed,’ he

said, ‘she has not.’

‘And never would,’ said Mrs Todgers, ‘if you saw her daily. She never

makes the least complaint to me, or utters a single word of explanation

or reproach. But I know,’ said Mrs Todgers, drawing in her breath, ‘I

know!’

Tom nodded sorrowfully, ‘So do I.’

‘I fully believe,’ said Mrs Todgers, taking her pocket-handkerchief

from the flat reticule, ‘that nobody can tell one half of what that poor

young creature has to undergo. But though she comes here, constantly,

to ease her poor full heart without his knowing it; and saying, “Mrs

Todgers, I am very low to-day; I think that I shall soon be dead,” sits

crying in my room until the fit is past; I know no more from her. And,

I believe,’ said Mrs Todgers, putting back her handkerchief again, ‘that

she considers me a good friend too.’

Mrs Todgers might have said her best friend. Commercial gentlemen and

gravy had tried Mrs Todgers’s temper; the main chance--it was such a

very small one in her case, that she might have been excused for looking

sharp after it, lest it should entirely vanish from her sight--had taken

a firm hold on Mrs Todgers’s attention. But in some odd nook in Mrs

Todgers’s breast, up a great many steps, and in a corner easy to be

overlooked, there was a secret door, with ‘Woman’ written on the spring,

which, at a touch from Mercy’s hand, had flown wide open, and admitted

her for shelter.

When boarding-house accounts are balanced with all other ledgers, and

the books of the Recording Angel are made up for ever, perhaps there may

be seen an entry to thy credit, lean Mrs Todgers, which shall make thee

beautiful!

She was growing beautiful so rapidly in Tom’s eyes; for he saw that she

was poor, and that this good had sprung up in her from among the sordid

strivings of her life; that she might have been a very Venus in a minute

more, if Miss Pecksniff had not entered with her friend.

‘Mr Thomas Pinch!’ said Charity, performing the ceremony of introduction

with evident pride. ‘Mr Moddle. Where’s my sister?’

‘Gone, Miss Pecksniff,’ Mrs Todgers answered. ‘She had appointed to be

home.’

‘Ah!’ said Charity, looking at Tom. ‘Oh, dear me!’

‘She’s greatly altered since she’s been Anoth--since she’s been married,

Mrs Todgers!’ observed Moddle.

‘My dear Augustus!’ said Miss Pecksniff, in a low voice. ‘I verily

believe you have said that fifty thousand times, in my hearing. What a

Prose you are!’

This was succeeded by some trifling love passages, which appeared to

originate with, if not to be wholly carried on by Miss Pecksniff. At any

rate, Mr Moddle was much slower in his responses than is customary

with young lovers, and exhibited a lowness of spirits which was quite

oppressive.

He did not improve at all when Tom and he were in the streets, but

sighed so dismally that it was dreadful to hear him. As a means of

cheering him up, Tom told him that he wished him joy.

‘Joy!’ cried Moddle. ‘Ha, ha!’

‘What an extraordinary young man!’ thought Tom.

‘The Scorner has not set his seal upon you. YOU care what becomes of

you?’ said Moddle.

Tom admitted that it was a subject in which he certainly felt some

interest.

‘I don’t,’ said Mr Moddle. ‘The Elements may have me when they please.

I’m ready.’

Tom inferred from these, and other expressions of the same nature, that

he was jealous. Therefore he allowed him to take his own course; which

was such a gloomy one, that he felt a load removed from his mind when

they parted company at the gate of Furnival’s Inn.

It was now a couple of hours past John Westlock’s dinner-time; and he

was walking up and down the room, quite anxious for Tom’s safety. The

table was spread; the wine was carefully decanted; and the dinner smelt

delicious.

‘Why, Tom, old boy, where on earth have you been? Your box is here. Get

your boots off instantly, and sit down!’

‘I am sorry to say I can’t stay, John,’ replied Tom Pinch, who was

breathless with the haste he had made in running up the stairs.

‘Can’t stay!’

‘If you’ll go on with your dinner,’ said Tom, ‘I’ll tell you my reason

the while. I mustn’t eat myself, or I shall have no appetite for the

chops.’

‘There are no chops here, my food fellow.’

‘No. But there are at Islington,’ said Tom.

John Westlock was perfectly confounded by this reply, and vowed he would

not touch a morsel until Tom had explained himself fully. So Tom sat

down, and told him all; to which he listened with the greatest interest.

He knew Tom too well, and respected his delicacy too much, to ask him

why he had taken these measures without communicating with him first. He

quite concurred in the expediency of Tom’s immediately returning to his

sister, as he knew so little of the place in which he had left her, and

good-humouredly proposed to ride back with him in a cab, in which he

might convey his box. Tom’s proposition that he should sup with them

that night, he flatly rejected, but made an appointment with him for the

morrow. ‘And now Tom,’ he said, as they rode along, ‘I have a question

to ask you to which I expect a manly and straightforward answer. Do you

want any money? I am pretty sure you do.’

‘I don’t indeed,’ said Tom.

‘I believe you are deceiving me.’

‘No. With many thanks to you, I am quite in earnest,’ Tom replied. ‘My

sister has some money, and so have I. If I had nothing else, John, I

have a five-pound note, which that good creature, Mrs Lupin, of the

Dragon, handed up to me outside the coach, in a letter begging me to

borrow it; and then drove off as hard as she could go.’

‘And a blessing on every dimple in her handsome face, say I!’ cried

John, ‘though why you should give her the preference over me, I don’t

know. Never mind. I bide my time, Tom.’

‘And I hope you’ll continue to bide it,’ returned Tom, gayly. ‘For I

owe you more, already, in a hundred other ways, than I can ever hope to

pay.’

They parted at the door of Tom’s new residence. John Westlock, sitting

in the cab, and, catching a glimpse of a blooming little busy creature

darting out to kiss Tom and to help him with his box, would not have had

the least objection to change places with him.

Well! she WAS a cheerful little thing; and had a quaint, bright

quietness about her that was infinitely pleasant. Surely she was the

best sauce for chops ever invented. The potatoes seemed to take a

pleasure in sending up their grateful steam before her; the froth upon

the pint of porter pouted to attract her notice. But it was all in vain.

She saw nothing but Tom. Tom was the first and last thing in the world.

As she sat opposite to Tom at supper, fingering one of Tom’s pet tunes

upon the table-cloth, and smiling in his face, he had never been so

happy in his life.

Martin Chuzzlewit · 第 49 / 72 题