Wellington, Jan. 28th, 1812.
My very dear Friend,
I VERY much long to see you and your little domestic circle, and,
especially so, in consequence of the information contained in your last:
for I am given to understand that personal intercourse will not much
longer be vouchsafed me.
Do not suppose, however, that I would wish that any personal advantage,
which I might promise myself from your remaining in England, should prove
the least obstacle to that most glorious work which it has pleased God to
incline you to desire and pursue. I rejoice most sincerely in the grace
which he has poured upon you, and I admire the leadings of Divine
Providence, which have so clearly and manifestly opened your path. But
still, notwithstanding the approval which my judgment is constrained to
give, yet I cannot altogether divest myself of that affection which would
fain induce me to chain you to some nearer spot. It tells me that _real_
friends are few; it whispers also that, among all my friends, no one has
ever yet so completely merited the name. But still, as it has pleased
God to put it into the heart of my friend to undertake so noble, so
glorious an employment, I cannot for a moment indulge any feeling of
complaint. It is all well; and, as I said before, I rejoice in the grace
and providential dealings which have been manifested on your behalf.
It requires no small measure of _faith_ and _self-denial_ to leave the
pleasures of social life—the intercourse of friends and the innumerable
ties which a long series of years has tended to strengthen. I have often
gazed in silent admiration at the peculiar kind of spirit which must
animate a missionary, and have concluded that it must be peculiarly
acceptable in the sight of Almighty God. But, alas! much as I have
admired the spirit, I feel that I have scarcely a spark of it—not,
indeed, that I should find it difficult to forego the pleasures which at
present surround me, not that I should be staggered at leaving my present
situation to live in one which is remote, and which is now unknown to me;
but that I am sensible that _these feelings would not last_. The
inconceivable ignorance of some, the stupidity of others, and the state
(I was going to say) of _moral and religious incapacity_, to which a long
indulgence in vicious habits has reduced the generality, would check my
fervour, damp my zeal, and cause me either to slacken my exertions, or
else to desist from the work in despair. When we get into discouraging
circumstances, how readily do we slide into despondency. We may not,
perhaps, altogether lose sight of the power of God, and its
all-sufficiency to help us through; but we are apt to conclude that we
are not the proper instruments; that we have protruded ourselves into
situations which God never designed for us; and that, though he _could_
most easily help us, yet that, for wise purposes, he sees fit to leave us
in a great measure to ourselves. Such, my dear Armstrong, are our
reasonings in general, when brought into discouraging circumstances; and,
from a close examination of my own heart for some years past, I am
persuaded that whatever zeal and self-denial might animate me in the
first instance, yet that these blessed feelings would not last when
brought to those severe trials which are the lot of the _missionary_—I
mean of that person who has to contend with all the difficulties arising
from a foreign station. These difficulties, however, in your case are
greatly diminished, and even were it otherwise the Spirit vouchsafed to
you, may enable you to grapple with them with the greatest ease. Oh!
that this may be your constant experience! I rejoice in that spirit and
temper which has hitherto regulated the conduct of my friend, and my
constant, my stated prayers shall ascend up before the God of power and
grace, that he may ever enjoy a rich unction—a complete baptism from
above.
Assure Mrs. A. of my kind regards. Much as I admire _your_ faith and
self-denial, I think that of your dear partner no less conspicuous. When
God has work to be done, how sweetly can he influence our minds so as to
make us co-workers with himself.
Believe me,
Your most affectionate though unworthy Friend,
G. M.
* * * * *
Mr. Mortimer was married February 21st, 1812, to Miss Barford, a lady of
pious habits and of amiable manners, and who proved herself a most useful
and affectionate helpmeet to him. In the view of this event, he
prepared, some months before it took place, the following resolutions for
his government in the married state:—
“Since it is very probable I shall soon be united with my dearest
friend M. B., and since we are always in danger of overlooking the
duties of each relation in life, while engaged in it, though, before
we enter upon it, we may perceive them plainly enough, I would,
therefore, now, in an humble dependence upon Almighty God, and as in
his sight, set my hand to the following resolutions, which I would
purpose never to swerve from upon any occasion, let it be ever so
trivial:—
“1st. Since the grand secret of domestic comfort depends upon the
_regulation of our tempers_, I would, in the first place, endeavour
to keep a strict watch over these; would avoid _pettishness_, of
every description, and would guard against a degree of _pertinacity_,
which has always been more or less troublesome to me: would never be
_positive in argument_, and will strive to remove every appearance of
_self-will_, and never to oppose my dearest friend in _any_ thing,
excepting when duty _imperiously calls_; and even then, in such a
manner as shall impress her more with an idea of my affectionate
regards towards her, than of any wish to consult my own
gratification.
“In the 2nd place: will cultivate a _tender_ and _affectionate_
manner, always seeking out means of promoting her comfort, and
lessening her troubles; sharing every _domestic_ and _maternal_
anxiety with _tender solicitude_.
“In the 3rd place: will be completely _open_; will have no secrets;
on the contrary, will consult her in everything; will give her the
freest access to all my papers, letters, &c.; will also commit to her
entire management all my money concerns; and will take no more for my
private purse than we shall amicably settle between ourselves.
“Fourthly. With regard to _company_, will make choice of those
persons who shall be most agreeable to herself, and will be very
attentive to those of her relations with whom she may wish to be
connected—especially her mother and sister.
“Fifthly. Being aware of the foolish trouble occasioned by
fastidiousness in the _choice of food_, am determined never to
express my partiality for any particular joint or dish, and never to
make the smallest objection to anything which comes to table.
Remember Duke Fortunatus, and the incessant squabbles occasioned by
his fluctuating taste and pettish tempers.
“So lastly. As to the arrangement of _domestic concerns_, will
interfere as little as need be, and will never meddle either in the
choice or dismissal of the servants, and will be careful never to
find with them unnecessary fault.
“These rules and regulations I will read over the first day of every
month, so long as it shall please God to spare me, and will make them
matter of most serious prayer.
“Should I see fit to make any additions to the above, will still
never destroy _this_ identical paper, but keep it as exhibiting my
views previous to marriage, and as a witness against me in future
life, should I deliberately violate them.
“I write these rules in my college rooms on the 20th of May, 1811,
being the day on which I complete the 27th year of my age, and being
also the last of my remaining in Cambridge.
“GEORGE MORTIMER.”