CCLVI. TO GEORGE SAND
23 April, 1873
It is only five days since we parted, and I am missing you like the
devil. I miss Aurore and all the household down to Fadette. Yes,
that is the way it is, one is so happy at your house! you are so
good and so interesting.
Why can't we live together, why is life always so badly arranged?
Maurice seems to me to be the type of human happiness. What does he
lack? Certainly, he is no more envied by anyone than by me.
Your two friends, Tourgueneff and Cruchard philosophized about that
from Nohant to Chateauroux, very comfortably borne along in your
carriage at a smart pace by two horses. Hurrah for the postillions
of La Chatre! But the rest of the trip was horrid because of the
company we had in our car. I was consoled for it by strong drink, as
the Muscovite had a flask full of excellent brandy with him. We both
felt a little heavy hearted. We did not talk, we did not sleep.
We found here the barodetien folly in full flower again. On the
heels of this affair has developed during the last three days,
Stoppfel! another bitter narcotic! Oh! Heavens! Heavens! what a bore
to live in such times! How wise you are live so far from Paris!
I have begun my readings again, and, in a week I shall begin my
excursions hereabouts to discover a countryside that may serve for
my two good men. After which, about the 12th or the 15th, I shall
return to my house at the water-side. I want very much, this summer,
to go to Saint Gervais, to bleach my nose and to strengthen my
nerves. For ten years I have been finding a pretext for doing
without it. But it is high time to beautify myself, not that I have
any pretensions at pleasing and seducing by my physical graces, but
I hate myself too much when I look in my mirror. The older one
grows, the more care one should take of oneself.
I shall see Madame Viardot this evening, I shall go early and we
will talk of you.
When shall we meet again, now? How far Nohant is from Croisset!
Yours, dear good master, all my affection.