MARRIED ladies and elderly gentlemen are allowed to claim
precedence at the card-table, over single young ladies and the
younger men. Ladies of "a certain age," if single, can claim the
privileges of the card-table with married ladies.
Etiquette does not require any one to play unwillingly. It is very
rude to urge the request, as many have conscientious scruples on
this matter, though they may not care to wound the feelings of
those playing by proclaiming them.
It is not kind, however, and therefore it is not etiquette, to
refuse to play, if there are no such scruples, when the refusal
prevents a game being made up.
None should attempt to play--whist, for instance--unless really
able to do so moderately well. It is not fair to impose a poor
partner upon one who may be really fond of the game and play well.
It is not etiquette for those very fond of card-playing to
victimize every guest by producing cards whenever they call,
whether they care for playing or not. Many will play from good-
nature who would prefer to pass the time in conversation.
Husband and wife, or any partners who may be supposed to be
intimately acquainted with each other's play, should not play
together. It is taking an unfair advantage of the other couple for
them to play partners.
If playing for stakes, the gentleman pays for his lady partner in
the event of loss; but does not receive her winnings.
All violations of the known rules of the game are violations of
the laws of etiquette as well. Yet, if such violations are made,
they should be pointed out in a quiet and courteous manner, not
made the subject of violent dispute or censure. Any altercations
are violations of the laws of etiquette. Loss of temper, no matter
how continuous the ill-luck, is a breach of manners; so are
objurgations of one's partner's performances, and criticisms on
the play of partner or adversary. In whist, as in marriage, the
partner is taken for better for worse, and in neither case should
an ill-assorted couple try to make matters worse than they are by
grumbling and growling at each other.
It is a breach of etiquette to talk constantly upon other subjects
whilst engaged in a game of cards. Whist, as all good players
know, is a game that requires close attention, and almost absolute
silence; and the other games can be much disturbed by talking.
To converse with those who are not playing is still worse. It is a
violation of all courtesy to allow the attention to be diverted at
all. If addressed while at the game, make your answer as brief as
politeness will permit, and give your whole attention to the game
again. No one can play so well with divided attention; and you may
be certain it is an annoyance to your partner, even if your
opponent does not object to it.
Any appearance of an understanding between partners, as smiles,
nods, or winks, are gross violations, not only of the laws of the
game, but of good manners.
To finger the cards whilst they are being dealt is a breach of
good manners. Even if you do not violate the laws of the game by
actually looking at them, you are committing an error in etiquette
by seeming to be in any way aware of their existence before you
are at liberty to take them in your hand.
Never start a conversation that would lead to long argument or
discussion in the pauses of the game. Small talk, chit-chat, is
certainly admissible whilst the cards are being dealt, but only
upon topics which can be readily dropped when the play is again
the leading subject.
To play cards with an air of weariness or abstraction is
positively rude. If you are not interested in the game, strive to
appear so, and if you are not equal to that, you had better stop
playing.
Try to avoid argument upon nice points in playing. Even if you are
right, it is more courteous to yield to your adversary than to
keep others waiting whilst you prove your position.
Etiquette by no means requires stakes of money. If counters are
not provided for betting games, you may refuse to bet, without any
breach of good manners.
In your own house, never offer guests any but _new_ cards to play
with.
It is a violation of etiquette to propose card-playing in another
person's house. This is the privilege of the host or hostess, and
if they do not suggest the amusement, it is absolutely rude for
any one else to do so.
It is a breach of etiquette to hurry others who are playing.
Nothing annoys a deliberate player more than to have a partner or
adversary constantly saying, "Come, play; it is your turn now,"
or, "We are all waiting for you."
Even if you take no pleasure in cards, some knowledge of the
etiquette and rules belonging to the games most in vogue will be
useful to you, unless you object upon principle to playing. If so,
it is better at once to state the fact. If not, and a fourth hand
is wanted at a rubber, or if the rest of the company sit down to a
round game, you will be deemed guilty of a want of politeness if
you refuse to join.
The games most common are whist, loo, euchre, vingt-un, and
speculation.
Whist requires four players. A pack of cards being spread upon the
table, with their faces downward, the four players draw for
partners. Those who draw the two highest, and those who draw the
two lowest, become partners. The lowest of all claims the deal.
In declaring that married people may not play at the same table,
society by no means understands anything so disgraceful as
dishonest collusion; but persons who play regularly together
cannot fail to know so much of each other's mode of acting under
given circumstances that the chances no longer remain perfectly
even in favor of their adversaries.