CHAPTER IX

It seemed to Anne as if they would never reach Madonna di Campiglio.

Rome clung to them in its little hollow at every turn of the long

winding road, a soft golden blur under a high and silvery cap; and when

at last the Campagna, wave after wave, had rolled over it, and defied

even St. Peter’s to raise itself again above the last blue fold, the

heat and dust of the plains swallowed them, train and all. It was a

comfort to exchange (after a night’s heat and bells) into the smooth

swift gliding car, to stop at a wayside inn and rest in the heat of the

day, and to catch glimpses of the lake of Garda, a charmed turquoise,

with olives hanging like smoke, down the mountains to the water’s edge.

They passed Riva and Arco, Riva broken and crumpled like a roughly used

toy by the ravages of war; and Arco lifting its sharp rock hill, covered

with cypress, into the wide spaces of the blue air. The valley climbed

and wound behind Arco, the road shifting to and fro by the banks of a

fast flowing river. Far away over the plain they could see small towered

islands resting in it, and castles rising from wooded promontories above

its smooth flow. The cypresses and the hills were shaped and pointed,

like the small wild tulips which grow in southern meadows; at last Italy

sank away altogether.

A flock of mountains drove across their sight. The air changed suddenly

into the scent of pines and juniper, and the small herbs which make

breathing a strong delight. The day grew dark and clear, the piled gold

of the sunset lay far away upon the western hills. The scent of the

small Alpine meadows was very cool and sweet. On all sides of them they

heard the sound of innumerable hidden streams, rustling and whispering

down into the valley; and above their heads the coming and going of the

wind in the pines died away, increased to a volume of intense secretive

rapture, and murmured on indefinitely among a thousand ruminating trees.

Toby smoked speechlessly. He was conscious of Anne’s every movement, and

it would have been difficult to say if he found her presence most a

torment or a strange delight. Whenever she was jolted against him by the

movements of the car, he set his teeth hard on the stem of his pipe. He

was burningly aware of her nearness, and not without amusement at the

distance of her unsuspecting thoughts. It was doubtful if Anne was any

more alive to Toby’s presence than she was to the chauffeur’s in front

of them. They had spent nearly two days travelling together, and talk

beyond discussion of incidents of travel had died down between them. In

a sense Anne may have been said to have enjoyed these days more than

Toby. She had had no wish to improve upon them, and Toby could have

suggested many improvements.

“It’s very far away,” Anne said at last, “to Madonna di Campiglio.”

“Up to the top of the Pass,” agreed Toby. “Are you warm enough?” Anne

acquiesced in a thick cloak being tucked around her, and nestled down

more comfortably into its folds. The valley had sunk into a deep gulf

beneath them, and on the other side of it swept range after range of

pine covered mountains, with every now and then, at a turn of the road,

bare and splendid, a distant Dolomite, a treeless rock as big as half a

world. Anne grew stiff and tired and in spite of the extra cloak, a

little cold. It seemed to her as if they must long ago have passed the

last traces of mankind, and be skimming upwards to some empty star. She

could not visualise Norman and Nina awaiting her. It was a year since

she had said good-bye to Norman in her little London house, and given up

one by one the beauty of her selected treasures. She could remember the

blue delphiniums in the tall opalescent vases, and how the motor ’buses

had sent up a distant roar, not unlike the torrent they were fast

leaving behind. But she couldn’t remember what she had felt, or dimly

imagine what she was going to feel again. The towering background of the

mountains made emotion seem a remote and trivial thing. You could not

continue to care about Sheraton chairs or blue Venetian vases in this

vast and empty space, where houses and human beings were but frailties

of possession. How worse than ridiculous it was—how petty, but at the

bottom of her heart she found the fear that they wouldn’t be glad enough

to see her, to impress Toby! She was conscious that Toby’s doubts were

still real, and that her heart was set on seeing them dispersed.

Winter and darkness came down upon them in a stride. Anne had no fear

left now, but the fear that they weren’t ever going to arrive at all.

The road wound up interminably, the mountains seemed to turn like a vast

silent top, whipped by an invisible demon. It came with a shock when

they found themselves at last upon an open space.

“Well, here we are,” said Toby stepping out into the darkness. This

pine-scented dusk was Madonna di Campiglio. Norman and Nina were on the

roadside in front of the hotel to greet them. As Anne moved stiffly

down, she found herself folded in Nina’s arms, and then suddenly,

surprisingly, for a brief moment, in Norman’s.

They were glad to see her—gladder than she had dared to expect. Their

eyes and voices were all greeting, excitement and pleasure. They even

flowed over Toby who took their enthusiasm with a stoical cordiality. It

was so perfect a meeting that Anne was afraid of the warmth and light;

they might make her silly. But she was drinking Gluwein, and having hot

water bottles produced like magic, in a room on the bed of which a pink

satin coverlet gleamed, before she had time to let the silliness come

over her. There was no fear of it after that. Fortified and invigorated

she could let all her pleasures come—Nina’s joy first, and then her

beauty. Nina was really beautiful now. All her prettiness was set free

and flowing, her eyes were so full of laughter, all the storms of life

could not have quenched their light, while they left the source of it

untouched. At dinner Anne had time to notice the change (beautiful too,

she instantly allowed) in Norman. He was older as well as handsomer,

something had filled him out and made him at once more responsible and

less highly strung. There was no hint of antagonism in his eyes as they

met hers, nor even of embarrassment. They looked at her in a kind of

warm, companionable tenderness, as if they only had in common the happy

secret of how to take care of Nina. Anne shrank from no participation in

their joy. Her feelings were unalloyed by the slightest touch of

resentment. She was even careful not to crow too openly over Toby, who

must be looking a little silly at the absence of any situation to face.

But fortunately for Toby, he had in general very little change of

expression. Anne was relieved to see that he was going to get on

perfectly well with Nina. He treated her from the first with the kind of

indulgent chaff which Nina herself best liked to display. As for Toby’s

behaviour to Norman, it could hardly be called behaviour at all, so

perfectly had it sunk into the casual ease of their old relationship.

Norman was too happy to be embarrassed, but he was a little too excited.

He couldn’t quite contain the overflowings of his joy. He made too many

jokes and he couldn’t for two minutes together leave Nina’s name out of

the conversation.

The season was still young, and there were not too many people yet in

the hotel. The ones there were looked at them with considerable envy,

for they were easily the merriest party in the room. When it was decided

that Anne must be too tired for anything but the pink satin coverlet

Nina went with her to help her to unpack her things.

“This,” said Nina, “is quite the most beautiful thing of all—just to

have you here with us.” She seemed to hesitate a little, though her

eyes, full of their relentless laughter, ran before her speech. “You and

Toby! And anyone can see, you know, you beautiful, absurd, and splendid

Anne, how happy you could make him!”

Anne was a little disturbed by this incredible blunder, but she wasn’t

angry. She saw that Nina couldn’t help wishing to find partners for

every solitary soul. “It doesn’t matter that you’re wrong,” she said

smilingly, “more wrong than you can possibly imagine—Toby’s tragedy,

fortunately for me, lies somewhere else, so I haven’t that on my

conscience, nor any unhappiness of my own. My dear, to see you and

Norman——!”

Nina appeared for a moment a trifle crestfallen. She had a strong will

and disliked her plans, however recent, to miss fire. But she didn’t

long believe that they could. “Oughtn’t I to have said that,” she asked,

“so soon? Norman scolds me awfully about my tongue. He says I always say

first all the things I oughtn’t, and then all the things the other

person oughtn’t. But seriously, Anne, Norman has set his heart too——”

Anne interrupted her by a light kiss. “I know where his heart is set,

and where for that matter it rises,” she said good-humouredly. “It will

get on quite well, my dear, without making mistakes about poor Toby.”

She didn’t say anything about herself. That Norman should have had such

a thought for her made her want to get the door shut and Nina well on

the other side of it, but she couldn’t be said, even when that happened,

to feel much better off. Her window had a balcony and she went out on it

and leaned into the cold fine darkness. She reminded herself that she

must be prepared for sinkings of the heart. She wasn’t there to let

herself mind trivial mishaps, but to build up a sane and tranquil

relationship. They would make many mistakes and no doubt she would make

them as well, and find her own rather more difficult to face than

theirs. Mistakes didn’t matter, providing she could bear the brunt of

them herself. What she mustn’t do was to be resentful when she was hurt,

or to allow herself to sink into disastrous self-pity. As to their

absurd romance about Toby, if it saved them from all compunction to

weave it, why shouldn’t she let it alone? Dear, quiet, undemonstrative

Toby, with his comfortably buried secret about some quite impossible

person, was probably the safest peg to hang their fancies on.

“Anne,” said a voice below her window, “is your room all right?”

It wasn’t Toby’s fault that for a brief, breathless moment she had

thought it was Norman’s voice.

The perfect wife · 第 9 / 13 章