I stand by, and I mark,
And I see some things plain;
And the looks that are dark
At the JAP'S game, and gain,
From that Heathen Chinee, are peculiar;
But aloof _I_'m content to remain!
AH SIN at the game
Thought him chipper and spry;
But he's "spoofed" all the same--
(Whatsome'er _that_ imply)--
And his smile is less pensive and childlike
Than when he once played with BILL NYE.
Little JAP _looked_ absurd--
As regarding mere size--
And some people inferred
He was feeble likewise;
Yet he's played it this time upon JOHNNY
In a way it's scarce safe to despise.
In the saffron pair's game
I did not take a hand.
Some conceived that the same
JAP did not understand;
But his grin somehow soon turned the tables
On "the smile that was childlike and bland."
'Tis a theme for BRET HARTE,
P'raps he only could show
The artful JAP'S art--
If I may put it so--
In a way which is worthy the subject.
But _me_ interfere, gents? Why, no!
If JAP'S cards had been stocked--
Which I do not believe--
Had our feelings been shocked
By the state of JAP'S sleeve;
We might have had reason for charging
The same with intent to deceive.
But the hands he has played
With that Heathen Chinee,
And the points he has made,
Are, as far as I see,
The result of good play _plus_ good fortune;
And _does_ it concern you or me?
The Russ standing by
Turned his glance upon me.
(For the JAP'S pile _was_ high.)
And he hissed, "Shall this be?
Must I have this smart JAP for a neighbour?
Shall _he_ clear out the Heathen Chinee?"
Swarthy FRANÇOIS looked glum,
Ginger HANS rubbed his chin:
But I smoked and stood mum,
As the JAP raked the tin.
Then I says, "He's played fairly and squarely.
So what call have _we_ to cut in?
"In the game, as you know,
You would not take a hand,
But a short while ago;
So let JAPPY now land
The stakes, and AH SIN take his hiding
At the game his foe _does_ understand.
"JOHNNY thought himself strong
At that game; but the facts
Seem to prove he was wrong;
And unwisely he acts
In howling at getting in warfare
What's frequent in warfare--that's whacks!
"Which is why I remark,
And my purpose is plain,
That looks that are dark
At the JAPPY are vain.
And, although you may think me peculiar,
Aloof--for the time--I remain!"
* * * * *
SOMETHING IN THE WAY OF "GREAT EXPECTATIONS."--When JABEZ S. BALFOUR
arrives, no doubt his first visit will be to the editor of the _Penny
Illustrated Paper_, in which paper appeared the portrait of him
as "Mayor of CROYDON," wearing his chain of office--alas! the
chain!--that led directly to his identification and arrest. The
photograph was taken first and JABEZ was taken afterwards. Will JABEZ
S. BALFOUR call in at the office of the _P. I. P._ and say, with _Joe
Gargery_, "Ever the best of friends, ain't us, _P. I. P._?" Not quite
likely.
* * * * *
PROPOSED CHANGE OF NAME.--If Sir WHITTAKER ELLIS agrees to the scheme
for adding Bute House Estate--a Bute-iful property--to Richmond Park,
thus preserving it from the builders, then will he be gratefully
remembered as "WISEACRE ELLIS."
* * * * *
"BAR GOLD."--Fees to barristers.
* * * * *
[Illustration: JOHN STANDS ALOOF.