_Question_. The _Herald_ would like to have you give your ideas
on divorce. On last Sunday in your lecture you said a few words
on the subject, but only a few. Do you think the laws governing
divorce ought to be changed?
_Answer_. We obtained our ideas about divorce from the Hebrews--
from the New Testament and the church. In the Old Testament woman
is not considered of much importance. The wife was the property
of the husband.
"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's ox or his wife." In this
commandment the wife is put on an equality with other property, so
under certain conditions the husband could put away his wife, but
the wife could not put away her husband.
In the New Testament there is little in favor of marriage, and
really nothing as to the rights of wives. Christ said nothing in
favor of marriage, and never married. So far as I know, none of
the apostles had families. St. Paul was opposed to marriage, and
allowed it only as a choice of evils. In those days it was imagined
by the Christians that the world was about to be purified by fire,
and that they would be changed into angels.
The early Christians were opposed to marriage, and the "fathers"
looked upon woman as the source of all evil. They did not believe
in divorces. They thought that if people loved each other better
than they did God, and got married, they ought to be held to the
bargain, no matter what happened.
These "fathers" were, for the most part, ignorant and hateful
savages, and had no more idea of right and wrong than wild beasts.
The church insisted that marriage was a sacrament, and that God,
in some mysterious way, joined husband and wife in marriage--that
he was one of the parties to the contract, and that only death
could end it.
Of course, this supernatural view of marriage is perfectly absurd.
If there be a God, there certainly have been marriages he did not
approve, and certain it is that God can have no interest in keeping
husbands and wives together who never should have married.
Some of the preachers insist that God instituted marriage in the
Garden of Eden. We now know that there was no Garden of Eden, and
that woman was not made from the first man's rib. Nobody with any
real sense believes this now. The institution of marriage was not
established by Jehovah. Neither was it established by Christ, not
any of his apostles.
In considering the question of divorce, the supernatural should be
discarded. We should take into consideration only the effect upon
human beings. The gods should be allowed to take care of
themselves.
Is it to the interest of a husband and wife to live together after
love has perished and when they hate each other? Will this add to
their happiness? Should a woman be compelled to remain the wife
of a man who hates and abuses her, and whom she loathes? Has
society any interest in forcing women to live with men they hate?
There is no real marriage without love, and in the marriage state
there is no morality without love. A woman who remains the wife
of a man whom she despises, or does not love, corrupts her soul.
She becomes degraded, polluted, and feels that her flesh has been
soiled. Under such circumstances a good woman suffers the agonies
of moral death. It may be said that the woman can leave her husband;
that she is not compelled to live in the same house or to occupy
the same room. If she has the right to leave, has she the right
to get a new house? Should a woman be punished for having married?
Women do not marry the wrong men on purpose. Thousands of mistakes
are made--are these mistakes sacred? Must they be preserved to
please God?
What good can it do God to keep people married who hate each other?
What good can it do the community to keep such people together?
_Question_. Do you consider marriage a contract or a sacrament?
_Answer_. Marriage is the most important contract that human beings
can make. No matter whether it is called a contract or a sacrament,
it remains the same. A true marriage is a natural concord or
agreement of souls--a harmony in which discord is not even imagined.
It is a mingling so perfect that only one seems to exist. All
other considerations are lost. The present seems eternal. In this
supreme moment there is no shadow, or the shadow is as luminous as
light.
When two beings thus love, thus united, this is the true marriage
of soul and soul. The idea of contract is lost. Duty and obligation
are instantly changed into desire and joy, and two lives, like
uniting streams, flow on as one.
This is real marriage.
Now, if the man turns out to be a wild beast, if he destroys the
happiness of the wife, why should she remain his victim?
If she wants a divorce, she should have it. The divorce will not
hurt God or the community. As a matter of fact, it will save a
life.
No man not poisoned by superstition will object to the release of
an abused wife. In such a case only savages can object to divorce.
The man who wants courts and legislatures to force a woman to live
with him is a monster.
_Question_. Do you believe that the divorced should be allowed to
marry again?
_Answer_. Certainly. Has the woman whose rights have been outraged
no right to build another home? Must this woman, full of kindness,
affection and health, be chained until death releases her? Is
there no future for her? Must she be an outcast forever? Can she
never sit by her own hearth, with the arms of her children about
her neck, and by her side a husband who loves and protects her?
There are no two sides to this question.
All human beings should be allowed to correct their mistakes. If
the wife has flagrantly violated the contract of marriage, the
husband should be given a divorce. If the wife wants a divorce,
if she loathes her husband, if she no longer loves him, then the
divorce should be granted.
It is immoral for a woman to live as the wife of a man whom she
abhors. The home should be pure. Children should be well-born.
Their parents should love one another.
Marriages are made by men and women, not by society, not by the
state, not by the church, not by the gods. Nothing is moral, that
does not tend to the well-being of sentient beings.
The good home is the unit of good government. The hearthstone is
the corner-stone of civilization. Society is not interested in
the preservation of hateful homes. It is not to the interest of
society that good women should be enslaved or that they should
become mothers by husbands whom they hate.
Most of the laws about divorce are absurd or cruel, and ought to
be repealed.
--_The Herald_, New York, February, 1897.