CHAPTER XIII.

LOOKING FOR WORK.

DR. DENNIS had just gone into his study to make ready for the evening

prayer-meeting, when he heard his door-bell ring. He remembered with a

shade of anxiety that his daughter was not yet out of school, and that

his sister and housekeeper was not at home. It was more than likely that

he would be interrupted.

"What is it, Hannah?" he asked, as that person appeared at his door.

"It is Miss Erskine, sir. I told her that Miss Dennis was out of town,

and Miss Grace was at school, and she said it was of no consequence, she

wanted to see the minister himself. Will I tell her that you are

engaged?"

"No," said Dr. Dennis, promptly. The sensation was still very new, this

desire on the part of any of the name of Erskine to see him. His

preparation could afford to wait.

Two minutes more and Ruth was in the study. It was a place in which she

felt as nearly embarrassed as she ever approached to that feeling. She

had a specific purpose in calling, and words arranged wherewith to

commence her topic; but they fled from her as if she had been a school

girl instead of a finished young lady in society; and she answered the

Doctor's kind enquiries as to the health of her father and herself in an

absent and constrained manner. At last this good man concluded to help

her.

"Is there any thing special that I can do for you to-day?" he asked,

with a kindly interest in his tone, that suggested the feeling that he

was interested in her plans, whatever they were, and would be glad to

help.

"Yes," she said, surprised into frankness by his straightforward way of

doing things; "or, at least, I hope you can. Dr. Dennis, ought not every

Christian to be at work?"

"Our great Example said; 'I must work the works of him that sent me

while it is day.'"

"I know it; that very verse set me to thinking about it. That is what I

want help about. There is no work for me to do; at least, I can't find

any. I am doing just nothing at all, and I don't in the least know which

way to turn. I am not satisfied with this state of things; I can't

settle back to my books and my music as I did before I went away; I

don't enjoy them as I used to; I mean, they don't absorb me; they seem

to be of no earthly use to anyone but myself, and I don't feel

absolutely certain that they are of any use to me; anyway, they are not

Christian work."

"As to that, you are not to be too certain about it. Wonderful things

can be done with music; and when one is given a marked talent for it, as

I hear has been the case with you, it is not to be hidden in a napkin."

"I don't know what I can do with music, I am sure," Ruth said,

skeptically. "I suppose I must have a good deal of talent in that

direction; I have been told so ever since I can remember; but beyond

entertaining my friends, I see no other special use for it."

"Do you remember telling me about the songs which Mr. Bliss sang at

Chautauqua, and the effect on the audience?"

"Yes," said Ruth, speaking heartily, and her cheeks glowing at the

recollection "but he was wonderful!"

"The same work can be done in a smaller way," Dr. Dennis said, smiling.

"I hope to show you something of what you may do to help in that way

before another winter passes; but, in the meantime, mere entertainment

of friends is not a bad motive for keeping up one's music. Then there is

the uncertain future ever before us. What if you should be called upon

to teach music some day?"

A vision of herself toiling wearily from house to house in all weathers,

and at all hours of the day, as she had seen music teachers do, hovered

over Ruth Erskine's brain, and so utterly improbable and absurd did the

picture seem, when she imagined it as having any reference to her, that

she laughed outright.

"I don't believe I shall ever teach music," she said, positively.

"Perhaps not; and yet stranger things than that _have_ happened in this

changeful life."

"But, Dr. Dennis," she said, with sudden energy, and showing a touch of

annoyance at the turn which the talk was taking, "my trouble is not an

inability to employ my time; I do not belong to the class of young

ladies who are afflicted with _ennui_." And a sarcastic curve of her

handsome lip made Ruth look very like the Miss Erskine that Dr. Dennis

had always known. She despised people who had no resources within

themselves. "I can find plenty to do, and I enjoy doing it; but the

point is, I seem to be living only for myself, and that doesn't seem

right. I want Christian work."

To tell the truth Dr. Dennis was puzzled. There was so much work to do,

his hands and heart were always so full and running over, that it seemed

strange to him for anyone to come looking for Christian work; the world

was teeming with it.

On the other hand he confessed to himself that he was utterly

unaccustomed to hearing people ask for work; or, if the facts be told,

to having any one do any work.

Years ago he had tried to set the people of the First Church to work;

but they had stared at him and misunderstood him, and he confessed to

himself that he had given over trying to get work out of most of them.

While this experience was refreshing, it was new, and left him for the

moment bewildered.

"I understand you," he said, rallying. "There is plenty of Christian

work. Do you want to take a class in the Sunday-school? There is a

vacancy."

Ruth shook her head with decision.

"That is not at all my _forte_. I have no faculty for teaching children;

I am entirely unused to them, and have no special interest in them, and

no sort of idea how they are to be managed. Some people are specially

fitted for such work; I know I am not."

"Often we find our work much nearer home than we had planned," Dr.

Dennis said, regarding her with a thoughtful air. "How is it with your

father, Miss Erskine?"

"My father?" she repeated; and she could hardly have looked more

bewildered if her pastor had asked after the welfare of the man in the

moon.

"Are you trying to win him over to the Lord's side?"

Utter silence and surprise on Miss Erskine's part. At last she said:

"I hardly ever see my father; we are never alone except when we are on

our way to dinner, or to pay formal calls on very formal people. Then we

are always in a hurry. I cannot reach my father, Dr. Dennis; he is

immersed in business, and has no time nor heart for such matters. I

should not in the least know how to approach him if I had a chance; and,

indeed, I am sure I could do no good, for he would esteem it an

impertinence to be questioned by his daughter as to his thoughts on

these matters."

"Yet you have an earnest desire to see him a Christian?"

"Yes," she said, speaking slowly and hesitatingly; "of course I have

that. To be very frank, Dr. Dennis, it is a hopeless sort of desire; I

don't expect it in the least; my father is peculiarly unapproachable; I

know he considers himself sufficient unto himself, if you will allow the

expression. In thinking of him, I have felt that a great many years from

now, when he is old, and when business cares and responsibilities have

in a measure fallen off, and given him time to think of himself, he

might then feel his need of a Friend and be won; but I don't even hope

for it before that time."

"My dear friend, you have really no right to set a different time from

the one that your Master has set," her pastor said, earnestly. "Don't

you know that his time is always _now_? How can you be sure that he will

choose to give your father a long life, and leisure in old age to help

him to think? Isn't that a terrible risk?"

Ruth Erskine shook her decided head.

"I feel sure that my work is not in that direction," she said. "I could

not do it; you do not know my father as well as I do; he would never

allow me to approach him. The most I can hope to do will be to hold what

he calls my new views so far into the background that he will not

positively forbid them to me. He is the only person I think of whom I

stand absolutely in awe. Then I couldn't talk with him. His life is a

pure, spotless one, convincing by its very morality; so he thinks that

there is no need of a Saviour. I do pray for him; I mean to as long as

he and I live; but I know I can do nothing else; at least not for many a

year."

How was Dr. Dennis to set to work a lady who knew so much that she could

not work? This was the thought that puzzled him. But he knew how

difficult it was for people to work in channels marked out by others. So

he said, encouragingly:

"I can conceive of some of your difficulties in that direction. But you

have other friends who are not Christians?"

This being said inquiringly, Ruth, after a moment of hesitation,

answered it:

"I have one friend to whom I have tried to talk about this matter, but I

have had no success. He is very peculiar in his views and feelings. He

agrees to every thing that I say, and admits the wisdom and

reasonableness of it all, but he goes no further."

"There are a great many such people," Dr. Dennis said, with a quick

sigh. He met many of them himself. "They are the hardest class to reach.

Does your friend believe in the power of prayer? I have generally found

the safest and shortest way with such to be to use my influence in

inducing them to begin to pray. If they admit its power and its

reasonableness, it is such a very simple thing to do for a friend that

they can hardly refuse."

"I don't think he ever prays," Ruth said, "and I don't believe he would.

He would think it hypocritical. He says as much as that half the praying

must be mockery."

"Granting that to be the case, does he think he should therefore not

offer real prayer? That would be a sad state. Because I have many

hypocrites in my family whose words to me are mockery, therefore no one

must be a true friend."

"I know," said Ruth, interrupting. "But I don't know how to reach such

people. Perhaps he may be your work, Dr. Dennis, but I don't think he is

mine. I don't in the least know what to say to him. I refer to Mr.

Wayne."

"I know him," Dr. Dennis said, "but he is not inclined to talk with me.

I have not the intimacy with him that would lead him to be familiar. I

should be very certain, if I were you, that my work did not lie in that

direction before I turned from it."

"I am certain," Ruth said, with a little laugh.

"I don't know how to talk to such people. I should feel sure of doing

more harm than good."

"But, my dear Miss Erskine, I beg your pardon for the reminder, but

since you are thrown much into his society, will it not be necessary for

you, as a Christian, to talk more or less about this matter? Should not

your talk be shaped in such a way as to influence him if you can?"

"I don't think I understand," Ruth said, doubtfully. "Do you mean that

people should talk about religion all the time they are together?"

During this question Dr. Dennis had drawn his Bible toward him and been

turning over the leaves.

"Just let me read you a word from the Guide-book on this subject: 'Only

let your conversation be as becometh the Gospel of Christ.' 'As he which

hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation.'

'Seeing, then, that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of

person ought ye to be, in all holy conversation and godliness?' What

should you conclude as to Christian duty in the matter of daily

conversation?"

Ruth made no answer to this question, but sat with earnest, thoughtful

look fixed on her pastor's face.

"Who follows that pattern?" she asked, at last.

"My dear friend, is not our concern rather to decide whether you and I

shall try to do it in the future?"

Someway this brought the talk to a sudden lull. Ruth seemed to have no

more to say.

"There is another way of work that I have been intending to suggest to

some of you young ladies," Dr. Dennis said, after a thoughtful silence.

"It is something very much neglected in our church--that is the social

question. Do you know we have many members who complain that they are

never called on, never spoken with, never noticed in any way?"

"I don't know anything about the members," Ruth said. "I don't think I

have a personal acquaintance with twenty of them--a calling

acquaintance, I mean."

"That is the case with a great many, and it is a state of things that

should not exist. The family ought to know each other. I begin to see

your work clearer; it is the young ladies, to a large extent, who must

remedy this evil. Suppose you take up some of that work, not neglecting

the other, of course. 'These ought ye to have done, and not to have left

the other undone,' I am afraid will be said to a good many of us. But

this is certainly work needing to be done, and work for which you have

leisure."

He hoped to see her face brighten, but it did not. Instead she said:

"I hate calling."

"I dare say; calling that is aimless, and in a sense useless. It must be

hateful work. But if you start out with an object in view, a something

to accomplish that is worth your while, will it not make a great

difference?"

Ruth only sighed.

"I have so many calls to make with father," she said, wearily. "It is

the worst work I do. They are upon fashionable, frivolous people, who

cannot talk about _anything_. It is worse martyrdom now than it used to

be. I think I am peculiarly unfitted for such work, Dr. Dennis."

"But I want you to try a different style of calls. Go alone; not with

your father, or with anyone who will trammel your tongue; and go among a

class of people who do not expect you, and will be surprised and

pleased, and helped, perhaps. Come, let me give you a list of persons

whom I would like to have you call on at your earliest opportunity. This

is work that I am really longing to see done."

A prisoner about to receive sentence could hardly have looked more

gloomy than did Ruth. She was still for a few minutes, then she said:

"Dr. Dennis, do you really think it is a person's duty to do that sort

of work for which he or she feels least qualified, and which is the most

distasteful?"

"No," said Dr. Dennis, promptly. "My dear Miss Erskine, will you be so

kind as to tell me the work for which you feel qualified, and for which

you have no distaste?"

Again Ruth hesitated, looked confused, and then laughed. She began to

see that she was making a very difficult task for her pastor.

"I don't feel qualified for anything," she said, at last. "And I feel

afraid to undertake anything. But at the same time, I think I ought to

be at work."

"Now we begin to see the way clearer," he said, smiling, and with

encouragement in his voice. "It may seem a strange thing to you, but a

sense of unfitness is sometimes one of the very best qualifications for

such work. If it is strong enough to drive us to the blessed Friend who

has promised to make perfect our weakness in this as in all other

efforts, and if we go out armed in His strength we are sure to conquer.

Try it. Take this for your motto: 'As ye have opportunity.' And, by the

way, do you know the rest of that verse? 'Especially to them who are of

the household of faith.' It is members of the household that I want you

to call on, remember."

Ruth laughed again, and shook her head. But she took her list and went

away. She had no more that she wanted to say just then; but she felt

that she had food for thought.

"I may try it," she said, as she went out, holding up her list, "but I

feel that I shall blunder, and do more harm than good."

Dr. Dennis looked after her with a face on which there was no smile.

"There goes one," he said to himself, "who thinks she is willing to be

led, but, on the contrary, she wants to lead. She is saved, but not

subdued. I wonder what means the great Master will have to use to lead

her to rest in his hands, knowing no way but his?"

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The Chautauqua Girls At Home · 第 13 / 28 章