it._] Those lazy footmen—Set alarm—wake promptly—one hundred years!
THE GOVERNESS.
[_Almost asleep._] Have to go to work—learn new set of dates—important
events—one hundred years!
THE QUEEN.
[_Waking slightly._] How the fashions will have changed—one hundred
years!—New clothes—Shall have to order—entire new wardrobe! From
Paris—one hundred—new hats!
THE KING.
[_Slightly waking._] No, no! Same old styles—come back—into fashion
again—every hundred years! [_He settles himself comfortably, and is about
to doze again when some sound without arrests his attention._] Hark! Hark!
ALL.
[_Slightly roused._] Hark, hark, the lark!
THE KING.
Aye, the lark, and the hawk; bird of song and bird of prey alike; the
lion and the lamb—all, all falling fast asleep! Hear old lion snore!
Sleep one hundred years! [_He drops into slumber again._]
THE FROG.
Oh, I am so dry! I am so dry!
ALL.
Do keep still—not wake—everybody—one hundred—
THE FROG.
But I am so dry! [_A GARDENER’S BOY sprays him._] That’s better! Oh,
I was so dry! I was so dry! [_Again ALL murmur._] All very well for
landlubbers, but first time—I ever went without bath—one hundred years!
[_There is a slight somnolent pause, then softly, faintly the whir of
the wheels of FATE and the SPIN-WHEEL SONG rise from the enchanted mug;
meanwhile roses bubble over its sides, their long trailing sprays falling
like a veil over the sleeping PRINCESS._]
THE GARDENER.
[_Catching a handful of sprays, crosses the hall, these lengthening in
his progress, as if by miraculous growth from their root in the enchanted
mug._] Little slip—whole forest—one hundred years! [_Still holding the
ends of the trailing sprays he falls down, asleep._]
THE KING AND QUEEN.
[_In their sleep._] Good-night, Moss-Rose! Good-night, everybody, one
hundred years!
ALL.
[_In their sleep._] Good-night—everybody—one hundred years!
[_The CURTAINS now shut out the scene from our view, but if by any chance
these are lifted again we see roses, always moss-roses, fountaining from
the mug over the assemblage in their enchanted sleep._]
THE THIRD EVENT
[_The CURTAINS lifted, now disclose the same scene, but with the
GARDENER’S prophecy evidently fulfilled, for we seem to be on the
outskirts of a dense forest of moss-roses. As we gaze on this, wondering
what ever will come of it, we hear two voices, one which might properly
belong, and proves so to do, to a charming YOUNG PRINCE, while the other
is that of his TUTOR._]
THE PRINCE.
This way! What ho, Mentor! This way! [_He blows a blast on his horn._]
MENTOR.
What ho! Oh, I’m nearly smothered! And I’m almost pricked to death!
Where, in the name of forestry, are you?
THE PRINCE.
Here! This way!... To the right! So! Here we are!
[_They come from opposite directions, and meet on the outskirts of
the thicket confronting us, and we now see that PRINCE CHARMING fully
justifies his name, while MENTOR is no doubt a tutor with excellent
references. Each carries or drags a number of trophies in the way of arms
and legs and other portions of the anatomy, or some piece of the outfit,
of other PRINCES. They pause to rest._]
MENTOR.
What a wild-goose chase! And so far, not even the ghost of a wild-goose!
Only this human bric-a-brac! [_Throws down his burden._]
THE PRINCE.
Still, as an antiquarian, you ought not to grumble! [_Throwing down his
burden, also. Both sit._] Did you ever see such a collection?
MENTOR.
[_Picking up specimens._] Leg of the time of your great grandfather!
Right arm dating, let me see, fifty years back! Torso ninety-nine years
old!
THE PRINCE.
And we can’t construct one symmetrical skeleton out of them! None of
the rights match the lefts! Whatever shall we do with them? As trophies
they are interesting, yet one wouldn’t want them on the walls of the
dining-room!
MENTOR.
As soon as you ascend the throne you must build a new wing to the Royal
Museum for them. Ouch! Another thorn in my foot!
THE PRINCE.
Oh, I’m getting used to thorns! As for these fellows, look at them!
Everyone of them a human pin-cushion! Well, they certainly made a valiant
battle for the rose!
MENTOR.
The rose, the rose, always the rose! Haven’t you got that old tale out of
your mind yet?
THE PRINCE.
How can I, when I was brought up on it? It is true, nurses in long
succession were dismissed for attempting to tell me fairy-tales, but
these things will out! There was a jackdaw who used to sit on the barn
door and talk to himself about it, hour after hour. Then in the pond were
two venerable frogs who told me that in their tadpole youth they had been
to the palace itself to carry a mug as christening present for the Rose!
MENTOR.
Fudge! Have you any sandwiches left?
[_The PRINCE offers him the lunch-box that he carries, also a flask, then
proceeds with his discourse._]
THE PRINCE.
Also there was a robin whose grandmother had escaped from the forest just
before the slumber-spell fell on it!
MENTOR.
[_With his mouth full._] Fudge! Stuff and nonsense!
THE PRINCE.
And in my nursery there is a tiger-skin rug, you remember! Well, one day
it whispered to me—
MENTOR.
Gammon and spinach! I beg your pardon, my dear Prince, but really,
when you talk this way—Why, the thesis on which I took my doctor’s
degree is a refutation of the tissue of lies—very poetic ones, I
grant you—which form the myth of the Sleeping Beauty! [_He takes a
drink._] There’s a presentation copy in the Royal library! The trouble
is that the poetic myth is a best seller, while the leaves of the
presentation-copy-refutation remain uncut!
THE PRINCE.
But, my dear Mentor, how do you account for the disappearance of King
Johannes Johann Ivor Ivan Ian Giovanni Juan Jean John? The sudden
mysterious disappearance with all his court that caused my royal
ancestors to annex the kingdom to their own! It’s an historical fact, you
know!
MENTOR.
Oh, probably good King Jack got into some slight trouble—violated the
game laws, or something, so abdicated and went quietly abroad, leaving
the Court Chronicler to invent some pretty tale to hush up the scandal!
THE PRINCE.
But this forest that we have hewed and hacked our way through—How do you
account for it that every living thing in it, bird and beast, is fast,
fast asleep?
MENTOR.
The sleeping sickness is nothing new! Everyone, from Adam down, who has
had to sit through after-dinner oratory has felt a touch of it! It is
only the orators who are immune!
THE PRINCE.
And this forest—this marvellous forest of moss-roses?
MENTOR.
Just moss-roses! The soil in this region happens to be peculiarly
favourable to their growth!
THE PRINCE.
And the Princess herself, the heart and soul and living embodiment of a
moss-rose?
MENTOR.
My dear lad, all youths of the princely temperament are like you!
All want to turn the cold hard facts of science into romance, with a
beautiful maid at the root of a beautiful mystery! To let you into a
family confidence, it originated with my great-aunt! Oh, she was not
beautiful; she was practical and punctual, like me! In order to be always
in the right and put her husband always in the wrong she used to turn the
hands of the clock to whatever hour she thought would be for his best
good! It was one of those large, old-fashioned clocks, you know! And
one night, while inside the case, she got caught in the works, and for
eight days went up and down, clinging to the weights, ticking off the
seconds, striking the hours, before she was rescued by the little Swiss
man who came periodically to wind and regulate the household time-pieces!
My great-uncle-by-marriage, though at the time distracted with anxiety,
has since been heard to say that those were the happiest because the
most unpunctual hours of his life! Since which time it has passed into a
proverb when anything is wrong with the works of anything to look for a
woman in the case!
THE PRINCE.
What you say no doubt is true, and yet—
MENTOR.
And yet, like all young fools you won’t believe me till you yourself have
proved it! In spite of all these warnings, in the shape of fragments
of Kings’ Sons who have lost their lives in the attempt! If these poor
witnesses could speak, which, think you, would say, go forward, Prince
Charming? Persevere unto the end!
THE PRINCE.
Which, think, you, would say, Turn back, Prince Charming! Give it up!
MENTOR.
All! Every mother’s son of them!
THE PRINCE.
Not one! Not one protoplasmic atomy of one!
[_At this challenge the FRAGMENTS OF KINGS’ SONS become endowed with the
powers of life. The HANDS applaud, clap the PRINCE on the back, or shake
hands with him, the LEGS dance, and indeed the ruder of these buffet
MENTOR, one going so far as to kick his hat off. The TORSO inclines
itself approvingly, the HEADS bow, and many VOICES cry “Go forward,
Prince Charming! Persevere to the end!”_]
THE PRINCE.
You hear? [_To MENTOR._] I thank you, comrades, or fragments of comrades;
I thank you with all my heart!
MENTOR.
More fools they!... You see that while we have found countless hearts we
have not come upon one single set of brains! Now, now! [_Evading some of
the FRAGMENTS who seem disposed to resent this._] Since you are in pieces
can’t you rest in peace?
THE PRINCE.
Forward, that’s the word! With the Heart for my device, let my motto be:
Forward, to success, or death in the attempt!
[_He hacks away at the hedge, on which all the FRAGMENTS aid him._]
MENTOR.
Since you are determined to go on, why not try skill instead of strength!
See how all these branches seem to radiate from a common centre,
somewhere not far away, as if they had fountained, tent-wise, over a
clear space!... What’s that noise?
THE PRINCE.
People approaching! Who can it be?
[_We now hear a swish-swash approaching from the outer forest, also the
sound of an old man’s stick. Pausing, the PRINCE and MENTOR turn, and see
two elderly FROGS. These halt, and salute._]
FIRST FROG.
Pardon. Prince Charming, I believe!
SECOND FROG.
We believe!
THE PRINCE.
[_Salutes._] At your service, gentlemen!—Why, you are my two old friends
from the Frog-pond!
THE FROGS.
[_Gratified._] The same. The same!
FIRST FROG.
It’s a long time since Your Highness has made mud pies and listened to
our tales!
THE PRINCE.
But never have I forgotten these! The proof is, I am here, following
the prickly quest for the Sleeping Beauty in the enchanted forest of
moss-roses!
FIRST FROG.
All Kings’ Sons to whom the tale is told sooner or later follow the same
quest!
THE PRINCE.
And fall beside the way! [_Sighs, on which all the HEARTS sigh also._]
SECOND FROG.
True! Failures, but glorious! They fell because they were in advance of
their time! But you—
THE PRINCE.
I?
SECOND FROG.
You will succeed, because you are the Man of the Hour!
THE PRINCE.
[_Bows._] I thank you much for telling me this!
FIRST FROG.
Don’t mention it! We have followed you, every step of the way, rather
slowly, because of my brother’s rheumatism—
SECOND FROG.
I always get rheumatism unless I have wet feet! To sit in a puddle on a
chilly evening, that’s the only way to keep well!
FIRST FROG.
At any rate we got ahead of the jackdaw and the robin. Flighty things,
they stopped to wake up everybody and have a bit of worm with every old
acquaintance on the way!—There they are now! Flighty things! [_He shakes
his stick at two birds whom we hear chattering and whistling in a nearby
thicket._]
THE PRINCE.
My old friends! [_He waves his hand, whistling to the BIRDS who respond
in kind._] But, come! To work!
FIRST FROG.
Sir, we ask the privilege of following the adventure with you! In our
tadpole days, aye, even as pollywogs, we were devoted to the Frog who was
the oldest and most respected inhabitant of our pond. When he was chosen
godfather to the Princess it was we who carried the christening mug to
the palace. We were present when he was knighted, and baroneted! And now,
if he has dried up we wish to bestow on him a watery grave and dig a
mud-hole to his memory. [_He weeps._]
SECOND FROG.
That’s it; a mud-hole to the memory of Sir Amphibious! [_Weeps._]
THE PRINCE.
Gentlemen, your sentiments do you credit, and believe me, if there is
anything I can do in the way of restoratives ... casting a wet blanket,
or the like—! Why, what’s this? [_Stepping aside, he stoops to examine
something against which his foot had brushed._]
ALL.
[_Excited._] What is it?
THE PRINCE.
The hand of a man—not dead, but warm with sleep!
MENTOR.
[_Excited, stoops to examine._] A man wearing the badge of Court
Gardener, of the time of King Johannes Giovanni John!
[_Releasing the spray from the GARDENER’S hand the PRINCE raises this,
whereupon it snaps back toward the still invisible mug. ALL exclaim,
and set to work vigorously, assisted by the FRAGMENTS, and soon all the
sprays are drawn aside, curtain-wise, or pulled back by unseen forces
toward the mug. At last the scene is revealed, of the COURT asleep,
PRINCESS MOSS-ROSE in the centre, on her couch, against the mug. ALL
exclaim, and do homage._]
THE PRINCE.
At last, at last!
THE HEAD FRAGMENTS.
At last!
[_THE HEARTS sigh._]
THE PRINCE.
Poor dears, to think that I should succeed where such good men and true
have failed!
FIRST FROG.
Ah, to be the Man of the Hour—that’s success! If only one knows enough to
realise it!
SECOND FROG.
And there, there, is our own dear Sir Amphibious! Not changed one bit!
MENTOR.
Well, it’s all very well to talk of success, but after all you have only
come upon a bit of still-life, a canvas by an old master, as it were! And
the chances are it would crumble to dust if you were to transfer it to
the Royal Museum!
THE PRINCE.
But they’re only asleep!
THE FROGS.
That’s all!
MENTOR.
What’s the difference, if you can’t wake them?
THE PRINCE.
But I must! I must!... Eh, my friends?
VOICES.
[_From invisible sources._] You must!
THE PRINCE.
[_Gazing on MOSS-ROSE from afar._] And yet, so beautiful, how dare I?
THE VOICES.
You must!
THE PRINCE.
[_To MENTOR._] You hear? They say I must!
MENTOR.
Who say so? Simply the echoes of your sophomoric fancy!
THE VOICES.
Fiddlestrings!
MENTOR.
Eh? I beg your pardon?
THE VOICES.
Fudge! Gammon and spinach!
MENTOR.
[_Piqued._] Oh, very well! Only I don’t see the good of getting a degree
if I’m not allowed to know anything about anything!
A SINGLE VOICE.
Go forward! Take your fate into your own hands!
THE PRINCE.
Who gave me that counsel? You, my jackdaw? You, friend robin?
FIRST FROG.
Oh, that’s Destiny! Destiny always is in at the death!
THE PRINCE.
The death?
FIRST FROG.
Or the other ending!
MENTOR.
Well, if they have to be wakened let’s go to work and waken them! Here,
I’ll begin with the governess! [_He approaches the GOVERNESS._] Miss! I
regret to disturb you, Miss, but do you happen to know the date? Where
was the first nail knocked, eh? How many scruples make a conscience? Bah!
Things that I could answer in my sleep!
THE FROGS.
[_Stroking SIR AMPHIBIOUS._] Dry as a bone, poor dear! Lucky we brought a
wet sponge with us! [_After repeated efforts to arouse their friend, they
desist in despair._] Dear, dear, if we could only get him down to the
_marshes_!
THE PRINCE.
What can I do? [_He appeals to the HEARTS who sigh in response. He
listens to them more closely._] What’s that? You want to sing! [_He sets
them in the window where they give the notes of the scale, like an Æolian
harp._] Do, re, mi, fa, sol, la, si—and the scale is closed by the echo
in my own heart! What is it you sing,
King’s son, King’s son,
Nothing ventured, nothing won!
Forward! Forward! To your bliss!
Wake your Princess with your kiss!
[_At this the PRINCE throws up his arm in an ecstasy of understanding,
then reverently approaches the sleeping MOSS-ROSE, and, stooping, kisses
her. The HEARTS sigh in musical sympathy not unmixed with personal
regret. MOSS-ROSE stirs slightly, then, by degrees wakens fully.
Meanwhile the PRINCE stands aside. ALL waken._]
MOSS-ROSE.
Oh, mother, father, I had such a dream! I dreamed that I was asleep!
THE KING.
Oh, my child, impossible! Though I believe I’ve had forty winks myself!
What were we saying, love?
THE QUEEN.
About our daughter’s future. You know it’s time we thought of a suitable,
ahem!
THE CHANCELLOR.
A suitable alliance, madam! I was just running over the list of
marriageable princes!
THE GARDENER.
[_Waking._] Eh, a bonny bush from a wee slip!
THE FROG.
Oh, I am so dry! Eh? Who’s this? And this? [_Seeing the other FROGS._]
MOSS-ROSE.
I dreamed I had been asleep one hundred years—We all had been asleep one
hundred years! I wonder if it could be true!
THE GOVERNESS.
But, my dear, such things don’t happen!
MENTOR.
Yes, they do! And you’re a living illustration!
THE GOVERNESS.
[_Surprised._] I beg your pardon! Whoever you are, if you had a diploma
you would know better!
MENTOR.
If you had a degree you’d know better, so there!
MOSS-ROSE.
[_Half rising from her couch._] Haven’t we all been asleep one hundred
years?
THE QUEEN.
What can the child mean?
THE CHANCELLOR.
There’s no precedent for it, Your Royal Highness! And yet—[_Yawns and
rubs eyes._]
MOSS-ROSE.
There was a word that everyone was afraid to say to me!
ALL.
[_Beginning to remember._] Oh, yes!
MOSS-ROSE.
Beginning with s-p!
ALL.
Oh, hush!
MOSS-ROSE.
Oh, but one mustn’t be afraid of anything!... What’s this? [_Noticing the
spindle in her hand. ALL look, interested._]
MENTOR.
[_Advances, examines it._] Spindle belonging to a spinning-wheel of a
century ago!
ALL.
[_Exclaim, remembering._] Oh!
MOSS-ROSE.
That’s the word! Spin! Oh, it won’t ever hurt me any more!
[_As she speaks the spindle is drawn by its thread back into the mug._]
THE CHANCELLOR.
[_Remembering._] To be sure. Sentence commuted—kindness of Sir
Amphibious—sleep for one hundred years!
ALL.
[_Remembering._] To be sure!
THE FROG.
[_Waking fully._] Oh, I am so dry! Eh, what? Why, here are my two
tadpoles! Quite grown up, eh, lads!
MOSS-ROSE.
[_Rising._] And here’s my birthday cake, uncut! But now I’m one hundred
and sixteen years old! But my dream—A great many Kings’ Sons tried to
hack their way through the moss-rose forest! [_The HEARTS sigh loud, the
FRAGMENTS salute, and do homage, as best they can._] See! See! There they
all are, what’s left of them! But one—Prince Charming was his name! Ah,
me! [_She turns away, and so comes face to face with the PRINCE who now
steps forward._] Ah! You—are you real, or my dream?
THE PRINCE.
By my faith, lady, I do not know! It is all as I myself have hoped and
dreamed, only more beautiful!
THE KING.
[_Grasping the situation._] What’s this? What’s this? A son-in-law who
can laugh at my jokes in my own language! If it’s a dream, why, I trust
no one will dare to wake me up!
THE QUEEN.
Heaven bless ye, my children! Prince, do tell me what the latest fashions
are!
THE COOK.
[_Waking with a start._] That roast is done to a turn!
THE BUTLER.
[_His alarm-clock going off, wakes._] Shut up! I’m not asleep! Your
Majesties, dinner is served!
THE KING.
Come! No formality! Really after such a hearty nap I must stretch my legs
a bit! [_Giving the QUEEN his hand he dances round the hall and to the
dining-room. MENTOR takes the GOVERNESS for partner; ALL choose partners,
THE PRINCE and MOSS-ROSE of course together. In the middle of the dance
MOSS-ROSE stops short._]
MOSS-ROSE.
Hush! Listen!
ALL.
What is it?
MOSS-ROSE.
The Spin-Wheel song! Hark, the merry Spin-Wheel’s song!
Wake! Day’s begun!
ALL.
[_Joining in gleefully._]
Thread comes short and thread comes long,
Spin, spinning, spun!
[_As they dance out, singing, the CURTAIN of MOSS-ROSES falls over them
again, closing the THIRD EVENT in the life of the PRINCESS MOSS-ROSE, and
leaving us in the pleasant certainty that she and her PRINCE CHARMING
lived happily forever after. May you who have peeped through the veil
with me do the same!_]
THE TESTING OF SIR GAWAYNE
_All Hallowe’en_
THE TESTING OF SIR GAWAYNE
_All Hallowe’en_
_What follows takes place at King Arthur’s Court in merry Carlisle,
on the Eve of All-Hallowmass when strange things happen ... when the
wicked crafts of sorcery work havoc with knightly adventure, and when
enchantments bring about marvelous endings in affairs of love. We
find ourselves looking backward through the years upon a scene that
renews itself before our eyes in the castle hall. On one side is the
banqueting-hall, and this way the servants pass to the kitchen [kitching
we shall hear it called by Sir Kay, the steward or Seneschal.] On the
other side the members of the Court pass to their sleeping-chambers or to
the massive door that opens to the outer world. A window gives, first,
the light of late afternoon in autumn, then moonlight, and finally a
bright dawn. A fire on the great hearth affords a cheerful glow. When it
is necessary to light the hall servants will set torches in their sockets
against the wall. The walls are adorned with trophies of the chase, and
with the arms of knight-errantry. A table, settees, a few plain chairs,
and throne-chairs for the King and Queen suffice for furnishing. We shall
now and then be taxed in our memory of French and Latin to understand
some of the expressions we shall hear ... as, for instance, when someone
bidding others leave the room cries, “Avoid! Avoid!” or when the word
“quest” is used at one time as we should say “question,” and at another
for “adventure.” We shall observe, too, that forms we have been taught
to consider common or ungrammatical, obtained then in polite language,
such as “afore” where we now say “before,” or the double negative,
“not never.” This is something that should make us hesitate before we
criticise the speech of simple people, country-folk, and ask ourselves
if their homely phrase is not after all but a survival of the elegance
of days gone by. It will interest us furthermore to note how in these
days of chivalry when religion, love, and deeds of arms are the topics
of the chronicler how freely, though not lightly, the names of Holy
Persons are invoked in conversation. The CHARACTERS whom we shall see
enact the little drama are KING ARTHUR and his lovely QUEEN GUINEVERE,
several KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE, including SIR KAY, the gruff steward
or Seneschal, SIR BORS, SIR BLEOBERIS, SIR MELIOGRANCE, and SIR GAWAYNE
about whom the story concerns itself. Then there is the KNIGHT the rescue
of whom nearly cost ARTHUR his realm, his life, and his queen. Also
there is the LITTLE PAGE who for his precocious valour was dubbed knight
and thereafter known as SIR GRIFLET, and there is the OUTRAGEOUS GIANT
who was but the gallant KNIGHT DÉLIVERÉ under a spell of enchantment.
Among the ladies we find DAME LAUREL, and the DAMOSEL who rode in such
breathless haste to ARTHUR’S court, seeking aid for her captive KNIGHT.
And, most important is the DÉLIVERANCE LA BELLE PILGRIM who was mocked at
for being “a loathly lady.” And of course there are PAGES and SERVANTS
and GENTLEMEN and WOMEN in waiting and SQUIRES and all the royal rest._
_The QUEEN is seated at her embroidery-frame, some of her LADIES
similarly occupied about her. The DAMOSEL sits near trying to fix her
thoughts upon a scroll that she however does not read. Some of the
KNIGHTS are occupying themselves peacefully in divers ways, two playing a
game of chess. Someone sings to the harp. Meanwhile the LITTLE PAGE keeps
watch at the window._
GUINEVERE.
Are there no signs yet of my lord that he doth return?
THE PAGE.
Not yet, madam!
GUINEVERE.
Alas! Evensong time is overpassed, and my lord comes not!
THE DAMOSEL.
Now is my heart more heavier than ever it was before for the sorrow I
have brought upon the gentlest and fairest lady of the world!
GUINEVERE.
Ah, you do well to let fall down your head for shame, for we had never
been in this sorry pass if you had never come hitherward, praying King
Arthur for succour for your knight!
THE DAMOSEL.
Ah, Madam, I pray you of mercy to mis-say me no more, for my heart is
like to brast with its own woe!
SIR KAY.
Madam, you are greatly to blame so to rebuke the damosel, for, wit ye
well, of his own will my Lord King Arthur did seek and take him upon that
hard adventure he is gone upon!
GUINEVERE.