CHAPTER XV.

'LOVE IS STRONG AS DEATH.'

Jerry Vane did not leave Carnaby Court at the time he intended to do;

with ulterior views in her kind heart, Clare pressed him to lengthen

his visit, and enjoy a few days' more shooting. She found but little

pressing requisite to influence Jerry's actions; yet ere long he had

cause greatly to deplore that he had not taken his departure earlier,

and he was again doomed to experience a bitter shock concerning his

rival--if rival, indeed, he had.

Daily and hourly intercourse afforded him all the facilities he could

wish for now; but it seemed as though Ida would never again receive

him or accept him as her lover, yet would permit him to be the slave

of her fascinations, and without the slightest symptoms of vanity or

coquetry. She knew all the simple and single-hearted fellow's love,

and yet, apparently, would not yield him hers.

Indeed, she had more than once hinted or said, he scarcely knew

which, as he declined to accept the proposition, that she wished his

regard for her to die away in silence. If so, why did she permit her

sister to urge that she should remain at Carnaby Court, where, in

virtue of her widowhood, she yet presided as matron, though some

change would assuredly take place on the return of Lady Evelyn to

England.

Whatever were her motives, he could not but give himself up blindly

and helplessly to the intoxication of the present time, to gaze upon

her face, to hear her voice, and conjure up the hope that a time

would come when she would love him better than ever. Besides, her

society was full of many charms. As in Clare, there was in Ida a

wonderful attraction to a companion. She had, though young,

travelled much in Europe, and seen all that was worth seeing. She

was thus familiar with many countries; and so far as their histories

and traditions went, together with a knowledge of literature that was

classic, refined, abstruse, and even mystic, as we have shown, she

was far beyond an everyday young Englishman like Jerry Vane.

'I am neither a boy nor a madman, yet I dream like both in hanging on

here as I do!' he would sometimes say in bitterness; and then he

would recall her remarkable words on that evening in town--'It may be

that we have only been in our hearts waiting for each other after

all.'

From what did these hopeful words spring?--coquetry, mockery,

reality, or what?

She was never known to coquet; she was too genuine a creature for

mockery; hence, they must have been reality, and, full of this

conviction, he resolved once more to put it to the issue on the first

opportunity, and one was secured on the very afternoon he made the

resolution.

He had not, that day, gone to shoot; the men were all abroad; nearly

all the ladies were out driving or riding, save Ida, whom he found in

the curtained oriel of the inner drawing-room, where she was standing

alone and gazing out on the far-stretching landscape, that was

steeped in the evening sunshine; the square spire of the village

church, the tossing arms of an old windmill, the yellow-thatched

roofs of white-walled cottages stood out strongly against the dark

green of the woodlands at the end of a long vista of the chase, and

made a charming picture. In the middle distance was some pasture

land, where several of Sir Carnaby's fierce little Highland cattle

and great fat brindled Alderneys stood knee-deep amid the rich grass.

Perhaps she was thinking of how often she had ridden there with

Beverley, and loved to hear him compliment her on the daring grace

and ease with which she topped her fences, and the lightness of hand

with which she lifted her bay cob's head; and Jerry feared that some

such thoughts might be passing through her mind as he paused

irresolutely and thought how beautiful was the outline and pose of

her darkly dressed figure against the flood of light that poured

through the painted oriel.

The dark shadow had been less upon her to-day than usual, and on

hearing his footstep on the soft carpet she turned and welcomed him

with a bright smile. Would that smile ever change again to coldness

and gloom? Would his hand ever again wander lovingly and half

fatuously among the richness of her auburn hair, that shone like

plaits of golden sheen in the light? Heaven alone knew.

'Dear Ida,' said he, longing, but not venturing to take her hand (he

had been on the point of saying 'darling'--had he not been privileged

once to do so?), 'I am so glad to find you thus alone, for I have

much to say, too, that cannot brook interruption.'

'Say on, then, Jerry,' said she, knowing too surely it would be 'the

old, old story,' while his devotion seemed to touch and pain her, for

she did honour and pity him, as she had already admitted.

'Ida, save on that night in the conservatory, I have hitherto, from

motives that you must be well aware of--motives most pure and

honourable--never spoken to you of the love that my heart has never,

never ceased to feel for you.'

'Love is no word for me to listen to now, Jerry.'

'Not from--from _me_?'

'Even from you, Jerry.'

'I implore you to be mine, Ida. Do not weep--do not turn away--you

stand alone now; this recent marriage has made your home a broken

one; I, too, am alone, and each needs the love of the other. Do not

trifle with me, Ida!'

'Trifle--I--oh, Jerry Vane.'

'You loved me once!' he urged, drawing very near.

'Yes--I loved you once,' she said, vaguely and wearily.

_Once!_ How cruel the speech sounded, though she did not mean it to

be so, of course; for as she turned to him, an infinite tenderness

filled her sparkling eyes of grey or violet blue--for times there

were when they seemed both; and his met them with something wistful

and pathetic in their gaze as he said:

'Ida, dearest Ida, time and separation--separation that seemed as if

it would be lifelong, have but strengthened the regard I bear you;

and now--now----'

'That I am free, you would say?'

'I entreat you to be mine. Your father would wish it, and I know

that dear Clare does. All my brightest hopes and associations, all

my fondest memories are of you; and all have been bound up now in the

hope that we might yet be so happy, beloved Ida.'

'Do not address me thus,' said she, imploringly, as she covered her

eyes with her slender fingers tightly interlaced.

'Ah--why?' he asked, entreatingly, and venturing to put a hand

lightly on each side of her little waist; but she stepped back, and

said in a low and concentrated voice:

'Because--how shall I say it? Each time you speak thus the strange

thrill I spoke of passes through me.'

'A thrill?'

'A shudder!' she answered,

'What causes it?'

'I cannot, cannot tell'

'My poor Ida! your nerves are all unstrung, and that absurd book of

Reichenbach's has made you worse. Promise to marry me, Ida, and we

will go to Switzerland, to Scotland, or anywhere that the breezes of

mountains or the sea may restore you to what you once were, even as

fate has restored you to me!'

But the lovely head was shaken sadly, and the pale face was turned to

the distant landscape. The passion with which he loved her was of a

quality certainly very rare in the world of 'society,' she knew that.

'Your wants are very simple, as your tastes are, Ida, and my fortune

is more than equal to your own--in worldly matters there can be

nothing wanting.'

'I know, Jerry, that a devotion such as yours deserves all the love I

could and ought to give it; and yet----'

She paused, and permitted him to retain her hand. Was she, in spite

of her asseverations to the contrary, about to love him after all?

The heart of Vane beat wildly amid the dawn of fresh hope.

'Many men have loved, Ida,' he urged, in a soft, low, passionate

tone; 'but it seems to me that I love you as few men have ever loved

before. From the first moment I met you I loved

you--and--and--surely circumstances have tested and tried that love

to the uttermost.'

'Most true, Jerry.'

'I ask not of what your--your regard has been for another since we

parted; I ask you only to love me as you did before that time, if you

can.'

The words that Vane spoke came from the depth of the honest fellow's

heart, in the full tide of emotion, and Ida could not fail to be

touched; and as she gave him one of her profound yet indefinable

glances of pity, the light in her beautiful eyes seemed to brighten

as her lashes drooped, and Jerry read in them an expression he had

not seen there since the happy time that was past.

In fact, Ida seemed to be trembling in her heart to think how

dear--was it indeed so?--how dear Jerry Vane was becoming to her

again, and how necessary to her his society was daily becoming, and

how like the old time it was--more like than, with all her past love

for Jack Beverley and her strange dreams and hauntings, she dared to

acknowledge to herself!

'Say, Ida, that the gap in my life is to be forgotten--filled up it

can never be!'

'Jerry, Jerry,' she urged, 'do not press me so--at present, at least!'

She was yielding after all.

'May I hope that you will accept me yet?' he said, pressing her hand

caressingly between both of his.

'A heart is not worth having, Jerry, that accords to pity only what

it should accord to love. You have all my esteem, and, perhaps, in

time, Jerry----'

She paused and shuddered visibly, and sank back with eyes half closed

and a hand pressed on her bosom as if about to faint or fall, but

Jerry's arm supported her.

'Good heavens, that sensation again!' he exclaimed.

'I must struggle against it, or it will conquer me,' she said,

suddenly regaining her firmness and striving to crush or shake off

the nervous emotion that shook her fragile form and gentle spirit.

'My darling, I am to blame; oh, pardon me, if I, at a time when your

health--your nervous system, at least--so selfishly urge my claim

upon your heart, for a strong and tender claim I have, indeed, Ida.'

There was in this an eloquence greater than more florid phrases could

express, as he spoke, for it seemed as if Jerry's very soul was spent

in what he said. After a pause, he said, with an arm still round her:

'I will not press you to answer me now, dearest Ida; you are pale and

seem so weary. I will go, but ere I do so, give me one kiss in

memory of the past, if not to encourage hope for the future.'

She lifted her sweet face to his, and there was infinite tenderness,

but no passion in the kiss she accorded him so frankly; and Vane was

but too sensible of that; while a sound like a deep sigh fell at the

same moment on the ears of both.

'Who sighed?' she asked, startled, in the fear that they were

overseen or overheard; 'did you, Jerry?'

'No; yourself, perhaps, darling.'

'Nay--I sigh often enough, but I did not do so now, Jerry.'

'Most strange! We must have deceived ourselves, for here are people

coming,' he added, as steps were heard in the outer drawing-room.

'You will give me a final answer, then?' he urged, in a deep, soft

whisper.

'Yes.'

'When?'

'This evening.'

'Bless you, darling Ida. Where?

'After dinner--we dine at six--say eight o'clock, in the rhododendron

walk.'

And as she left him, on her pouting lip and in her grey-blue

eyes--eyes that seemed black at night--Jerry thought that the sadness

was gone, and replaced by the beautiful smile of old. Unheard by

both, the dressing-bell for dinner had already rung, and several of

the sportsmen, Sir John Oriel, Colonel Rakes, and others, entered the

room. Among them was Major Desmond, the languid, irrepressible, and

imperturbable Desmond--who, en route from town, had turned up for a

single day's cover shooting at Carnaby Court.

Overcome by the new tide of his own thoughts, Jerry Vane hurriedly

left them to talk over their hits, misses, experiences, and exploits

of the day, the results of which had filled a small-sized pony cart.

He retired to his room to dress, and threw open the window to admit

the autumn breeze, that it might cool his flushed cheeks and

throbbing temples. The kiss of that beloved lip--albeit one so

coldly given--yet seemed to linger on his, and all nature around him

seemed to grow lighter now that hope had swelled in his heart.

Lit by the evening sun, the leaves of the masses of wild roses and

other creepers that clambered round the mullioned window of his room,

seemed to murmur pleasantly on the passing breeze, that brought also

the chimes of the village spire, the voices of the exulting birds,

and the pleasant rustle of the old oak trees in the chase. To the

ear of Jerry Vane there seemed to be a melody in all the voices of

nature now, for his own heart was all aglow with joy.

A haunted life · 第 15 / 21 章