THE COURTEOUS JUDGE
We were giving a dinner-party on that day to half a dozen Turkish
officers, and, when he brought me in my cup of tea at seven-thirty
a.m., Rashîd informed me that our cook had been arrested. The said
cook was a decent Muslim, but hot-tempered, and something of a blood
in private life. At six a.m., as he stood basking in the sunlight in
our doorway, his eyes had fallen on some Christian youths upon their
way to college, in European clothes, with new kid gloves and
silver-headed canes. Maddened with a sense of outrage by that horrid
sight, he had attacked the said youths furiously with a wooden ladle,
putting them to flight, and chasing them all down the long acacia
avenue, through two suburbs into the heart of the city, where their
miserable cries for help brought the police upon him. Rashîd, pursuing
in vain attempts to calm the holy warrior, had seen him taken into
custody still flourishing the ladle; but could tell me nothing of his
after fate, having at that point deemed it prudent to retire, lest he,
too, might be put in prison by mistake.
It was sad. As soon as I was up and dressed, I wrote to Hamdi Bey, the
chief of our intended visitors, informing him of the mishap which
would prevent our giving him and his comrades a dinner at all worthy
of their merit. By the time that I had finished dressing, Rashîd had
found a messenger to whom the note was given with an order to make
haste. He must have run the whole way there and back, for, after
little more than half an hour, he stood before me, breathless and with
streaming brow, his bare legs dusty to the knee. Rashîd had then gone
out to do some marketing. The runner handed me a note. It said:
'Why mention such a trifling detail? We shall, of course, be charmed
with anything you set before us. It is for friendship, not for food,
we come!'
There was a postscript:--
'Why not go and see the judge?'
Suleymân was in the room. He was an old acquaintance, a man of decent
birth, but poor, by trade a dragoman, who had acquired a reputation
for unusual wisdom. When he had nothing else to do, he came to me
unfailingly, wherever I might chance to be established or encamped. He
was sitting cross-legged in a corner, smoking his narghîleh,
capriciously illumined by thin slants of light, alive with motes, from
the Venetian blinds. He seized upon the postscript, crying:--
'It is good advice. Why not, indeed? Let us approach the judge.'
Therewith he coiled the tube of his narghîleh carefully around the
bowl thereof, and, rising with the same deliberation, threw upon his
shoulders a white dust-cloak, then looked at me, and questioned: 'Are
you ready?'
'But I do not know the judge.'
'No more do I. But that, my dear, is a disease which can be remedied.'
Without much trouble we found out the judge's house. A servant told us
that his Honour had already started for the court. We took a carriage
and pursued his Honour. At the court we made inquiry of the crowd of
witnesses--false witnesses for hire--who thronged the entrance. The
judge, we heard, had not yet taken his seat. We should be sure to find
his Honour in the coffee-shop across the road. One of the false
witnesses conducted us to the said coffee-shop and pointed out our
man. Together with his clerk and certain advocates, one of whom read
aloud the morning news, the judge sat underneath a vine arbour in
pleasant shade. He smiled. His hands were clasped upon a fair round
belly.
Suleymân, his dust-cloak billowing, strolled forward coolly, and
presented me as 'one of the chief people of the Franks.' The company
arose and made us welcome, placing stools for our convenience.
'His Highness comes to thee for justice, O most righteous judge. He
has been wronged,' observed Suleymân, dispassionately.
The judge looked much concerned. 'What is the case?' he asked.
'Our cook is snatched from us,' was the reply, 'and to-night we have
invited friends to dinner.'
'Is he a good cook?' asked the judge, with feeling.
'If your Excellency will restore him to us, and then join us at the
meal----'
'How can I be of service in this matter?'
I motioned to Suleymân to tell the story, which he did so well that
all the company were soon in fits of laughter.
The judge looked through the cause list till he found the case,
putting a mark against it on the paper.
'How can we dine to-night without a cook?' I sighed, despairingly.
'Fear nothing,' said the judge. 'He shall be with you in an hour.
Come, O my friends, we must to business! It grows late.'
The judge took leave of me with much politeness.
'Now,' said Suleymân, when they were gone, 'let us go into the court
and watch the course of justice.'
We crossed the narrow street to an imposing portal. Suleymân whispered
to a soldier there on guard, who smiled and bade us enter, with a
gracious gesture.
The hall inside was crowded. Only after much exertion could we see the
dais. There sat the judge, and there stood our lamented cook, the
picture of dejection. A soldier at his side displayed the wooden
ladle. The Christian dandies whom he had assaulted were giving their
account of the adventure volubly, until his Honour, with a heavy
frown, bade them be silent. Then they cowered.
'Be careful what you say,' the judge enjoined. 'You have not hesitated
to impute the anger of this cook to religious fanaticism. The
Nazarenes are much too ready to bring such a charge against the
Muslims, forgetful that there may be other causes of annoyance. Nay,
many of the charges brought have proved upon investigation to be
altogether groundless. You Nazarenes are often insolent in your
demeanour. Confiding in the favour of the foreign consuls, foreign
missionaries, you occasionally taunt and irritate, even revile, the
Muslims. Now, even supposing your account of this affair to be
correct--which I much doubt, for, on the one hand, I behold a wooden
ladle of no weight; while, on the other, there are two fine
walking-sticks with silver heads'--one of the Christian youths let
fall his stick in trepidation--'and you are two, while this poor cook
is one. Even supposing what you say is true, are you certain that
nothing in your appearance, conversation, or behaviour gave him cause
for anger? I incline to conjecture that you must have flouted him, or
uttered, it may be, some insult to his creed.'
'He beat us for no reason, and most grievously,' moaned one of the
assailed. Such language from a Muslim judge in a court filled with
Muslims made the two Christians tremble in their shoes.
'We did not even see him till he started beating us. By Allah, my poor
head is sore, my back is broken with that awful beating. He was like a
madman!' The speaker and his fellow-plaintiff wept aloud.
'Didst thou beat these youths, as he describes?' inquired the judge,
turning towards the cook with like severity.
'No, O Excellency!' came the bitter cry. 'I am an ill-used man, much
slandered. I never set eyes upon those men until this minute.' He also
began weeping bitterly.
'Both parties tell me lies!' exclaimed the judge, with anger. 'For
thou, O cook, didst beat these youths. The fact is known, for thou
wast taken in the act of beating them. And you, O Nazarenes, are not
much injured, for everyone beholds you in most perfect health, with
clothes unspoilt. The more shame to you, for it is evident that you
bring the charge against this Muslim from religious hatred.'
'By Allah, no, O Excellency. We wish that man no harm. We did but
state what happened.'
'You are a pack of rogues together,' roared the judge. 'Let each side
pay one whole mejîdi[1] to the court; let the parties now, this
minute, here before me, swear peace and lifelong friendship for the
future, and never let me hear of them again!'
The Christian youths embraced the cook, the cook embraced the
Christian youths repeatedly, all weeping in a transport of delight at
their escape from punishment. I paid the money for our man, who then
went home with us; Suleymân, upon the way, delivering a lecture of
such high morality, such heavenly language, that the poor, simple
fellow wept anew, and called on Allah for forgiveness.
'Repentance is thy duty,' said Suleymân approvingly. 'But towards this
world also thou canst make amends. Put forth thy utmost skill in
cookery this evening, for the judge is coming.'
FOOTNOTES:
[1] About four shillings.