I was now left equally without gold and without shadow; but a heavy
load was taken from my breast, and I felt cheerful. Had not my Minna
been irrecoverably lost to me, or even had I been perfectly free from
self-reproach on her account, I felt that happiness might yet have been
mine. At present I was lost in doubt as to my future course. I examined
my pockets, and found I had a few gold-pieces still left, which I
counted with feelings of great satisfaction. I had left my horse at the
inn, and was ashamed to return, or at all events I must wait till the
sun had set, which at present was high in the heavens. I laid myself
down under a shady tree and fell into a peaceful sleep.
Lovely forms floated in airy measures before me, and filled up my
delightful dreams. Minna, with a garland of flowers entwined in her
hair, was bending over me with a smile of good-will; also the worthy
Bendel was crowned with flowers, and hastened to meet me with friendly
greetings. Many other forms seemed to rise up confusedly in the
distance: thyself among the number, Chamisso. Perfect radiance beamed
around them, but none had a shadow; and what was more surprising, there
was no appearance of unhappiness on this account. Nothing was to be
seen or heard but flowers and music; and love and joy, and groves of
never-fading palms, seemed the natives of that happy clime.
In vain I tried to detain and comprehend the lovely but fleeting forms.
I was conscious, also, of being in a dream, and was anxious that
nothing should rouse me from it; and when I did awake, I kept my eyes
closed, in order if possible to continue the illusion. At last I opened
my eyes. The sun was now visible in the east; I must have slept the
whole night: I looked upon this as a warning not to return to the inn.
What I had left there I was content to lose, without much regret; and
resigning myself to Providence, I decided on taking a by-road that led
through the wooded declivity of the mountain. I never once cast a
glance behind me; nor did it ever occur to me to return, as I might
have done, to Bendel, whom I had left in affluence. I reflected on the
new character I was now going to assume in the world. My present garb
was very humble—consisting of an old black coat I formerly had worn at
Berlin, and which by some chance was the first I put my hand on before
setting out on this journey, a travelling-cap, and an old pair of
boots. I cut down a knotted stick in memory of the spot, and commenced
my pilgrimage.
In the forest I met an aged peasant, who gave me a friendly greeting,
and with whom I entered into conversation, requesting, as a traveller
desirous of information, some particulars relative to the road, the
country, and its inhabitants, the productions of the mountain, etc. He
replied to my various inquiries with readiness and intelligence. At
last we reached the bed of a mountain-torrent, which had laid waste a
considerable tract of the forest; I inwardly shuddered at the idea of
the open sunshine. I suffered the peasant to go before me. In the
middle of the very place which I dreaded so much, he suddenly stopped,
and turned back to give me an account of this inundation; but instantly
perceiving that I had no shadow, he broke off abruptly, and exclaimed:
“How is this?—you have no shadow!”
“Alas, alas!” said I, “in a long and serious illness I had the
misfortune to lose my hair, my nails, and my shadow. Look, good father;
although my hair has grown again, it is quite white; and at my age my
nails are still very short; and my poor shadow seems to have left me,
never to return.”
“Ah!” said the old man, shaking his head; “no shadow! that was indeed a
terrible illness, sir.”
But he did not resume his narrative; and at the very first cross-road
we came to left me without uttering a syllable. Fresh tears flowed from
my eyes, and my cheerfulness had fled. With a heavy heart I travelled
on, avoiding all society. I plunged into the deepest shades of the
forest; and often, to avoid a sunny tract of country, I waited for
hours till every human being had left it, and I could pass it
unobserved. In the evenings I took shelter in the villages. I bent my
steps to a mine in the mountains, where I hoped to meet with work
underground; for besides that my present situation compelled me to
provide for my own support, I felt that incessant and laborious
occupation alone could divert my mind from dwelling on painful
subjects. A few rainy days assisted me materially on my journey; but it
was to the no small detriment of my boots, the soles of which were
better suited to Count Peter than to the poor foot-traveller. I was
soon barefoot, and a new purchase must be made. The following morning I
commenced an earnest search in a market-place, where a fair was being
held; and I saw in one of the booths new and second-hand boots set out
for sale. I was a long time selecting and bargaining; I wished much to
have a new pair, but was frightened at the extravagant price; and so
was obliged to content myself with a second-hand pair, still pretty
good and strong, which the beautiful fair-haired youth who kept the
booth handed over to me with a cheerful smile, wishing me a prosperous
journey. I went on, and left the place immediately by the northern
gate.
I was so lost in my own thoughts, that I walked along scarcely knowing
how or where. I was calculating the chances of my reaching the mine by
the evening, and considering how I should introduce myself. I had not
gone two hundred steps, when I perceived I was not in the right road. I
looked round, and found myself in a wild-looking forest of ancient
firs, where apparently the stroke of the axe had never been heard. A
few steps more brought me amid huge rocks covered with moss and
saxifragous plants, between which whole fields of snow and ice were
extended. The air was intensely cold. I looked round, and the forest
had disappeared behind me; a few steps more, and there was the
stillness of death itself. The icy plain on which I stood stretched to
an immeasurable distance, and a thick cloud rested upon it; the sun was
of a red blood-color at the verge of the horizon: the cold was
insupportable. I could not imagine what had happened to me. The
benumbing frost made me quicken my pace. I heard a distant sound of
waters; and at one step more I stood on the icy shore of some ocean.
Innumerable droves of sea-dogs rushed past me and plunged into the
waves. I continued my way along this coast, and again met with rocks,
plains, birch and fir forests, and yet only a few minutes had elapsed.
It was now intensely hot. I looked around, and suddenly found myself
between some fertile rice-fields and mulberry trees; I sat down under
their shade, and found by my watch that it was just one quarter of an
hour since I had left the village market. I fancied it was a dream; but
no, I was indeed awake, as I felt by the experiment I made of biting my
tongue. I closed my eyes in order to collect my scattered thoughts.
Presently I heard unintelligible words uttered in a nasal tone; and I
beheld two Chinese, whose Asiatic physiognomies were not to be
mistaken, even had their costume not betrayed their origin. They were
addressing me in the language and with the salutations of their
country. I rose and drew back a couple of steps. They had disappeared;
the landscape was entirely changed; the rice-fields had given place to
trees and woods. I examined some of the trees and plants around me, and
ascertained such of them as I was acquainted with to be productions of
the southern part of Asia. I made one step towards a particular tree,
and again all was changed. I now moved on like a recruit at drill,
taking slow and measured steps, gazing with astonished eyes at the
wonderful variety of regions, plains, meadows, mountains, steppes, and
sandy deserts, which passed in succession before me. I had now no doubt
that I had seven-leagued boots on my feet.
I fell on my knees in silent gratitude, shedding tears of thankfulness;
for I now saw clearly what was to be my future condition. Shut out by
early sins from all human society, I was offered amends for the
privation by Nature herself, which I had ever loved. The earth was
granted me as a rich garden; and the knowledge of her operations was to
be the study and object of my life. This was not a mere resolution. I
have since endeavored, with anxious and unabated industry, faithfully
to imitate the finished and brilliant model then presented to me; and
my vanity has received a check when led to compare the picture with the
original. I rose immediately, and took a hasty survey of this new
field, where I hoped afterwards to reap a rich harvest.
I stood on the heights of Thibet; and the sun I had lately beheld in
the east was now sinking in the west. I traversed Asia from east to
west, and thence passed into Africa, which I curiously examined, at
repeated visits, in all directions. As I gazed on the ancient pyramids
and temples of Egypt, I descried, in the sandy deserts near Thebes of
the hundred gates, the caves where Christian hermits dwelt of old.
My determination was instantly taken, that here should be my future
dwelling. I chose one of the most secluded, but roomy, comfortable, and
inaccessible to the jackals.
I stepped over from the pillars of Hercules to Europe; and having taken
a survey of its northern and southern countries, I passed by the north
of Asia, on the polar glaciers, to Greenland and America, visiting both
parts of this continent; and the winter, which was already at its
height in the south, drove me quickly back from Cape Horn to the north.
I waited till daylight had risen in the east of Asia, and then, after a
short rest, continued my pilgrimage. I followed in both the Americas
the vast chain of the Andes, once considered the loftiest on our globe.
I stepped carefully and slowly from one summit to another, sometimes
over snowy heights, sometimes over flaming volcanoes, often breathless
from fatigue. At last I reached Elias’s mountain, and sprang over
Behring’s Straits into Asia; I followed the western coast in its
various windings, carefully observing which of the neighboring isles
was accessible to me. From the peninsula of Malacca my boots carried me
to Sumatra, Java, Bali, and Lombok. I made many attempts—often with
danger, and always unsuccessfully—to force my way over the numerous
little islands and rocks with which this sea is studded, wishing to
find a northwest passage to Borneo and other islands of the
Archipelago.
At last I sat down at the extreme point of Lombok, my eyes turned
towards the southeast, lamenting that I had so soon reached the limits
allotted to me, and bewailing my fate as a captive in his grated cell.
Thus was I shut out from that remarkable country, New Holland, and the
islands of the southern ocean, so essentially necessary to a knowledge
of the earth, and which would have best assisted me in the study of the
animal and vegetable kingdoms. And thus, at the very outset, I beheld
all my labors condemned to be limited to mere fragments.
Ah! Chamisso, what is the activity of man?
Frequently in the most rigorous winters of the southern hemisphere I
have rashly thrown myself on a fragment of drifting ice between Cape
Horn and Van Diemen’s Land, in the hope of effecting a passage to New
Holland, reckless of the cold and the vast ocean, reckless of my fate,
even should this savage land prove my grave.
But all in vain—I never reached New Holland. Each time, when defeated
in my attempt, I returned to Lombok; and seated at its extreme point,
my eyes directed to the southeast, I gave way afresh to lamentations
that my range of investigation was so limited. At last I tore myself
from the spot, and, heartily grieved at my disappointment, returned to
the interior of Asia. Setting out at morning dawn, I traversed it from
east to west, and at night reached the cave in Thebes which I had
previously selected for my dwelling-place, and had visited yesterday
afternoon.
After a short repose, as soon as daylight had visited Europe, it was my
first care to provide myself with the articles of which I stood most in
need. First of all a drag to act on my boots; for I had experienced the
inconvenience of these whenever I wished to shorten my steps and
examine surrounding objects more fully. A pair of slippers to go over
the boots served the purpose effectually; and from that time I carried
two pairs about me, because I frequently cast them off from my feet in
my botanical investigations, without having time to pick them up, when
threatened by the approach of lions, men, or hyenas. My excellent
watch, owing to the short duration of my movements, was also on these
occasions an admirable chronometer. I wanted, besides, a sextant, a few
philosophical instruments, and some books. To purchase these things, I
made several unwilling journeys to London and Paris, choosing a time
when I could be hid by the favoring clouds. As all my ill-gotten gold
was exhausted, I carried over from Africa some ivory, which is there so
plentiful, in payment of my purchases—taking care, however; to pick out
the smallest teeth, in order not to overburden myself. I had thus soon
provided myself with all that I wanted, and now entered on a new mode
of life as a student—wandering over the globe—measuring the height of
the mountains, and the temperature of the air and of the
springs—observing the manners and habits of animals—investigating
plants and flowers. From the equator to the pole, and from the new
world to the old, I was constantly engaged in repeating and comparing
my experiments.
My usual food consisted of the eggs of the African ostrich or northern
sea-birds, with a few fruits, especially those of the palm and the
banana of the tropics. The tobacco-plant consoled me when I was
depressed; and the affection of my spaniel was a compensation for the
loss of human sympathy and society. When I returned from my excursions,
loaded with fresh treasures, to my cave in Thebes, which he guarded
during my absence, he ever sprang joyfully forward to greet me, and
made me feel that I was indeed not alone on the earth. An adventure
soon occurred which brought me once more among my fellow-creatures.
One day, as I was gathering lichens and algae on the northern coast,
with the drag on my boots, a bear suddenly made his appearance, and was
stealing towards me round the corner of a rock. After throwing away my
slippers, I attempted to step across to an island, by means of a rock,
projecting from the waves in the intermediate space, that served as a
stepping-stone. I reached the rock safely with one foot, but instantly
fell into the sea with the other, one of my slippers having
inadvertently remained on. The cold was intense; and I escaped this
imminent peril at the risk of my life. On coming ashore, I hastened to
the Libyan sands to dry myself in the sun; but the heat affected my
head so much, that, in a fit of illness, I staggered back to the north.
In vain I sought relief by change of place—hurrying from east to west,
and from west to east—now in climes of the south, now in those of the
north; sometimes I rushed into daylight, sometimes into the shades of
night. I know not how long this lasted. A burning fever raged in my
veins; with extreme anguish I felt my senses leaving me. Suddenly, by
an unlucky accident, I trod upon some one’s foot, whom I had hurt, and
received a blow in return which laid me senseless.
On recovering, I found myself lying comfortably in a good bed, which,
with many other beds, stood in a spacious and handsome apartment. Some
one was watching by me; people seemed to be walking from one bed to
another; they came beside me, and spoke of me as NUMBER TWELVE. On the
wall, at the foot of my bed—it was no dream, for I distinctly read
it—on a black-marble tablet was inscribed my name, in large letters of
gold:
PETER SCHLEMIHL.
Underneath were two rows of letters in smaller characters, which I was
too feeble to connect together, and closed my eyes again.
I now heard something read aloud, in which I distinctly noted the
words, “Peter Schlemihl,” but could not collect the full meaning. I saw
a man of benevolent aspect, and a very beautiful female dressed in
black, standing near my bed; their countenances were not unknown to me,
but in my weak state I could not remember who they were. Some time
elapsed, and I began to regain my strength. I was called Number Twelve,
and, from my long beard, was supposed to be a Jew, but was not the less
carefully nursed on that account. No one seemed to perceive that I was
destitute of a shadow. My boots, I was assured, together with
everything found on me when I was brought here, were in safe keeping,
and would be given up to me on my restoration to health. This place was
called the SCHLEMIHLIUM: the daily recitation I had heard was an
exhortation to pray for Peter Schlemihl as the founder and benefactor
of this institution. The benevolent-looking man whom I had seen by my
bedside was Bendel; the beautiful lady in black was Minna. I had been
enjoying the advantages of the Schlemihlium without being recognized;
and I learned, further, that I was in Bendel’s native town, where he
had employed a part of my once unhallowed gold in founding an hospital
in my name, under his superintendence, and that its unfortunate inmates
daily pronounced blessings on me. Minna had become a widow: an unhappy
lawsuit had deprived Rascal of his life, and Minna of the greater part
of her property. Her parents were no more; and here she dwelt in
widowed piety, wholly devoting herself to works of mercy.
One day, as she stood by the side of Number Twelve’s bed with Bendel,
he said to her, “Noble lady, why expose yourself so frequently to this
unhealthy atmosphere? Has fate dealt so harshly with you as to render
you desirous of death?”
“By no means, Mr. Bendel,” she replied; “since I have awoke from my
long dream, all has gone well with me. I now neither wish for death nor
fear it, and think on the future and on the past with equal serenity.
Do you not also feel an inward satisfaction in thus paying a pious
tribute of gratitude and love to your old master and friend?”
“Thanks be to God, I do, noble lady,” said he. “Ah, how wonderfully has
everything fallen out! How thoughtlessly have we sipped joys and
sorrows from the full cup now drained to the last drop; and we might
fancy the past a mere prelude to the real scene for which we now wait
armed by experience. How different has been the reality! Yet let us not
regret the past, but rather rejoice that we have not lived in vain. As
respects our old friend also, I have a firm hope that it is now better
with him than formerly.”
“I trust so, too,” answered Minna; and so saying, she passed by me, and
they departed.
This conversation made a deep impression on me; and I hesitated whether
I should discover myself or depart unknown. At last I decided; and,
asking for pen and paper, wrote as follows:
“Matters are indeed better with your old friend than formerly. He has
repented; and his repentance has led to forgiveness.”
I now attempted to rise, for I felt myself stronger. The keys of a
little chest near my bed were given me; and in it I found all my
effects. I put on my clothes; fastened my botanical case round
me—wherein, with delight, I found my northern lichens all safe—put on
my boots, and, leaving my note on the table, left the gates, and was
speedily far advanced on the road to Thebes.
Passing along the Syrian coast, which was the same road I had taken on
last leaving home, I beheld my poor Figaro running to meet me. The
faithful animal, after vainly waiting at home for his master’s return,
had probably followed his traces. I stood still, and called him. He
sprang towards me with leaps and barks, and a thousand demonstrations
of unaffected delight. I took him in my arms—for he was unable to
follow me—and carried him home.
There I found everything exactly in the order in which I had left it;
and returned by degrees, as my increasing strength allowed me, to my
old occupations and usual mode of life, from which I was kept back a
whole year by my fall into the Polar Ocean. And this, dear Chamisso, is
the life I am still leading. My boots are not yet worn out, as I had
been led to fear would be the case from that very learned work of
Tieckius—De Rebus Gestis Pollicilli. Their energies remain unimpaired;
and although mine are gradually failing me, I enjoy the consolation of
having spent them in pursuing incessantly one object, and that not
fruitlessly.
So far as my boots would carry me, I have observed and studied our
globe and its conformation, its mountains and temperature, the
atmosphere in its various changes, the influences of the magnetic
power; in fact, I have studied all living creation—and more especially
the kingdom of plants—more profoundly than any one of our race. I have
arranged all the facts in proper order, to the best of my ability, in
different works. The consequences deducible from these facts, and my
views respecting them, I have hastily recorded in some essays and
dissertations. I have settled the geography of the interior of Africa
and the Arctic regions, of the interior of Asia and of its eastern
coast. My Historia Stirpium Plantarum Utriusque Orbis is an extensive
fragment of a Flora universalis terrae and a part of my Systema
Naturae. Besides increasing the number of our known species by more
than a third, I have also contributed somewhat to the natural system of
plants and to a knowledge of their geography. I am now deeply engaged
on my Fauna, and shall take care to have my manuscripts sent to the
University of Berlin before my decease.
I have selected thee, my dear Chamisso, to be the guardian of my
wonderful history, thinking that, when I have left this world, it may
afford valuable instruction to the living. As for thee, Chamisso, if
thou wouldst live amongst thy fellow-creatures, learn to value thy
shadow more than gold; if thou wouldst only live to thyself and thy
nobler part—in this thou needest no counsel.