ABOUT A KNAVE AND A FOOL
Clever men are either philosophers or knaves; and as the world is
crawling with fools the clever men who are philosophers spend their time
making laws which will protect the fools from the clever men who are
knaves. Sharp practice can only be punished, not stopped, so long as
simpletons are willing to give a florin for a purse which they think
contains two half-crowns, which is the sort of folly which gives rise to
wonder how many men are really rational beings. The fool will believe
anything if the knave talks long enough. No sort of folly is too
hopeless when there is a clever man at the head of it. Shouting will
establish a patent pill, found a new religion, produce a revolution; do
any marvel, except make people decent.
Pendoggat was a clever man in his own way; and Pezzack would have been a
fool anywhere. The minister had piped to others, a little jig of mines
and speculations, and some of them had danced in a half-hearted way. In
his quaint but sincere fashion he had preached of gold and precious
jewels; of bdellium and the onyx stone. It was the doctrine of "get
rich" that he proclaimed, and his listeners opened their ears to that as
they would scarcely have opened them to any more orthodox message of
redemption. "Do good to your body, and your soul will do good to
itself," was in effect what Pezzack was teaching, although he didn't
know it, and would have been grieved had any one suggested it. He
desired to place his listeners in comfortable circumstances, from the
retired grocer of Bromley to the Dartmoor widow who had five pounds'
worth of pence saved up in a teapot; to take unto himself a helpmeet;
last and least--although again he did not put it in that way--to rebuild
Ebenezer. So he preached of treasures hidden in the earth, and promised
his hearers that every sovereign sown therein would germinate without a
doubt, and bring forth in due season a healthy crop of some ten per
cents, and some twenty per cents.
People did not tumble over one another in any haste to respond. They
might not be clever, but they could be suspicious, and they asked at
once for particulars, desired to see the good thing for themselves, and
some of them wanted the twenty per cent, paid in advance by way of
guarantee against loss. There were plenty of wild stories concerning the
treasures of the moor. Were there not, upon every side, evidences of the
existence of precious minerals in the shape of abandoned mines? There
were tales of rich lodes which had been lost, but were sure to be picked
up again some day. The mining tradition was strong; but it was notorious
that copper and tin could hardly be worked at a profit. Pezzack answered
that he had discovered nickel, which was something far better, and his
announcement certainly did cause some of the flutter which Pendoggat had
looked for. The retired grocer took advantage of an excursion train to
Plymouth, ascended upon the moor, and having been sworn to secrecy was
conducted by Pendoggat, acting as Pezzack's manager, to the treasure
cave, and shown the ripe nickel running down its sides. Pendoggat also
knocked off a piece of the wall and appeared to give it to the retired
grocer as a sample. What he actually gave him was a fragment of
dirty-grey metal, which had not come from that cave or anywhere near it,
but had been procured by Pendoggat at some expense, seeing that it
really was a sample of nickel. The retired grocer had come down in
doubt, but returned converted to Bromley, submitted the sample to an
analyst, and subsequently acted foolishly. He was meddling with what he
did not understand, which is one of the most attractive things in life.
Adulterated groceries he could comprehend, because he had won retirement
out of them; but the mining industry was something quite outside his
experience. Apparently he thought that nickel could be taken off the
sides of a cave in much the same way as blackberries are picked off a
hedge. He confided the matter to a few friends, making them swear to say
nothing about it; and when they had told all their acquaintances
applications for shares in the good thing began to reach the retired
grocer, who unfortunately had nothing to occupy his time. He was soon
feeling himself a man of some importance, and this naturally assisted
him to entertain a very avuncular regard for nephew Pezzack, and a
friendly feeling for the "simple countryman Pendoggat" and the precious
metal called nickel. He thought of himself as a financial magnate, and
subscribed to the _Mining Journal_. He talked no more of prime Dorset,
nor did he discuss concerning the most suitable sand to mingle with
sugar; but he rehearsed the slang of the money-market instead, remarked
that he had struck a gilt-edged security, looked in the paper every
morning and observed to his wife that copper was recovering, or that
diamonds continued to droop. The head-quarters of the Tavy Cleave Nickel
Mining Company were really not upon Dartmoor at all, but at Bromley in a
straight little jerry-built street; which was exactly what the "simple
countryman Pendoggat" wanted.
A meeting of prospective shareholders was held in the chapel, but it
turned out a wet stormy evening and very few attended. Brother Pendoggat
led in prayer, which took a pessimistic view of things generally;
Pezzack delivered an impressive address on the need of more stability in
human affairs; and when the party had been worked into a suitable state
of enthusiasm, and were prepared to listen to anything, they got to
business.
The minister was destined to be astounded that evening by his brother in
religion and partner in business. Eli told the party what it was there
for, which it knew already, and then unfolded his prospectus, as it
were, before their eyes, telling them he had discovered a rich vein of
nickel, and contemplated forming a small company to work the same. It
was to be quite a private affair, and operations would be conducted as
unobtrusively as possible. The capital suggested was £500, divided into
five-shilling shares. While Eli talked Pendoggat sat motionless, his
arms folded, and his eyes upon his boots.
"Where's the mine?" asked a voice.
Pezzack replied he was not at liberty to say at that stage of the
proceedings; but he had brought a sample to show them, which was
produced and handed round solemnly, no one examining it with more
interest than Pendoggat, who had provided it. Every one declared that it
was nickel sure enough, although they had never seen the metal before,
and had scarcely an idea between them as to its value or the uses to
which it could be put.
"Us had best talk about it," suggested one of the party, and every one
agreed that was a sound idea, but nobody offered to say anything, until
an old farmer arose and stated heavily--
"Us knows there be rich trade under Dartmoor. My uncle, he worked on
Wheal Betsey, and he worked on Wheal Virtuous Lady tu, and he told I
often there was a plenty of rich trade down under, but cruel hard to get
at. He told I that many a time. Wouldn't hardly pay to work, 'twas so
hard to get at, he said. Such a main cruel lot o' watter, he said. Fast
as they gotten it out back it comed again. That's what he said, but he
be dead now."
The old fellow sat down with the air of a man who had cleared away
difficulties, and the others dragged their boots upon the boards with a
melancholy sound. Then some one else rose and asked if water was likely
to interfere with the mining of the nickel. Eli replied that there
certainly was water, and that announcement brought the old farmer up to
say: "It wun't pay to work." He added reasons also, in the same strain
as before.
An interval of silence followed. A deadlock had been reached. Those
present were inclined to nibble, but they all wanted the nickel for
themselves. They did not like the idea of taking shares and sharing
profits. They wanted to be told the precise locality of the mine, so
that they could go and help themselves. Pezzack had nothing more to say.
The old farmer had only his former statements about his uncle to repeat;
and he did so several times, using the same words.
At last Pendoggat got up, began to mumble, and every one leaned forward
to listen. Most of them did not like Pendoggat because they were afraid
of him; but they believed him to be a man of superior knowledge to
themselves, and they were inclined on the whole to follow his
leadership.
"We all trust the minister," Pendoggat was saying. "He's found nickel,
and he thinks there is money to be got out of it. He's right enough.
There is nickel. I've found it myself. That sample he had handed round
is as good a bit of nickel as ever I saw. But there's not enough of it.
We couldn't work it so as to pay expenses. It's on the common too, and
we would have to get permission from the Duchy, and pay them a royalty."
"Us could get out of that," a voice interrupted. "Them who cracks
granite be supposed to pay the Duchy royalties, but none of 'em du."
"Mining's different," replied Pendoggat. "The Duchy don't worry to
collect their granite royalties. 'Twould cost 'em more trouble than the
stuff is worth. There's more money in minerals than in granite. They
don't let a mine be started without knowing all about it. Minister has
told us what he knows, and we believe him. He won't deceive us. He
wouldn't tell a lie to save his life. We are proud of our minister, for
he's a good one."
"He be," muttered a chorus of approving voices.
"Looks like a bishop, sitting up there," exclaimed one of the admirers.
"So he du. So he be," cried they all.
The meeting was waking up. Eli sat limply, gazing at Pendoggat, very
unhappy and white, and looking much more like a large maggot than a
bishop.
"There's the trouble about the water," Pendoggat went on. "The whole
capital would go in keeping that pumped out, and it would beat us in the
end. All the money in the world wouldn't keep Tavy Cleave pumped dry.
I'm against the scheme, and I've got up to say I won't have anything to
do with it. I'm not going to put a penny of my money into any Dartmoor
mine, and if I did I should expect to lose it. That's all I've got to
say. The minister's not a commoner, and he don't know Dartmoor. He don't
know anything about mining either, except what he's picked up from
folks. He's a good man, and he wants to help us. But I tell him, and I
tell you, there's not enough nickel on the whole of Dartmoor to pay the
expense of working it."
Pendoggat shambled back into his chair, while his listeners looked at
one another and admitted he had spoken wisely, and Eli writhed
worm-like, wondering if there could be anything wrong with his ears. He
had been prepared to hear a certain amount of destructive criticism; but
that the whole scheme should be swept aside by Pendoggat as hopeless was
inexplicable. The old farmer seized the opportunity to stand upright and
repeat his former observations concerning his uncle, and the wheals, and
the "cruel lot o' watter" in them. Then the meeting collapsed
altogether. Pendoggat had killed it. The only thing left was the
mournful conclusion of a suitable prayer; and then to face the rain and
a wild ride homewards. There was to be no local support for the Nickel
Mining Company, Limited. Pendoggat's opposition had done for it.
The tenant of Helmen Barton had risen several points in the estimation
of those present, with the obvious exception of the staggered Pezzack.
He had proved himself a bold man and fearless speaker. He had not shrunk
from performing the unpleasant duty of opposing his pastor. Eli always
looked like a maggot. Now he felt like one. Pendoggat had set his foot
upon him and squashed him utterly. He would not be a wealthy man, there
was no immediate prospect of matrimony, nor would there be any new
Ebenezer, the presence of which would attract a special blessing upon
them, and the architecture of which would be a perpetual reproach to
that portion of the moor. It was an exceedingly troubled maggot that
wriggled up to Pendoggat, when the others had departed, and the door had
been fastened against the wind.
"This is an appalling catostrophe, Mr. Pendoggat." Eli often blundered
over long words, never having learnt derivations. "The most excruciating
catostrophe I can remember. I am feeling like chaff scattered by the
wind."
He was trying to rebuke Pendoggat. He was too much in awe of him to
speak more bitterly. Besides, he was a good Christian, and Eli never
lost sight of that fact, knowing that as a minister it was his duty not
to revile his fellow-creatures more than was necessary.
Pendoggat stood under a cold lamp, which cast a cold light upon his
black head, and his eyes were upon his boots. Eli stumbled against a
chair, and in trying to regain his balance fell against his companion,
causing him to lose control over himself for an instant. He struck out
his arm and sent Pezzack sprawling among the chairs like an ash-faggot,
a prospect of long black coat and big flat boots. Eli did not mind
tumbling, because he was used to it, not having been endowed with much
sense of gravity. He went about on a bicycle, and was constantly falling
off, and cutting fantastic figures in the air, between Brentor and
Bridestowe. But just then he had an idea that brute force had been used
against him. Pendoggat had struck him, not like the righteous who smite
in friendly reproof, but like the heathen who rage together furiously.
"Why did you strike me, Mr. Pendoggat?" he muttered, dragging himself to
a sitting posture upon a chair and looking whiter than ever. "You cast
me aside like a potter's vessel. Your precious palm might have broke my
'ead."
"Why can't you stand up, man?" said Pendoggat amicably. "You fell
against my arm where I pinched it this morning in the linny door. I
couldn't help pushing you away, and maybe I pushed harder than I meant,
for you hurt me. You tumbled over your own feet. Not hurt, are ye?"
"Yes, Mr. Pendoggat," whispered Eli. It was so silent in that dreary
chapel that the least sound was audible. "Not 'ere, not in my body, but
in my 'eart; not by the push you gave me, but by the words you 'ave
spoken. I stood up to-night, and I spoke like a fool, and I felt like a
fool. I was doing the work that you gave me to do, Mr. Pendoggat, and
you spoke against me."
Eli was growing bold. He had scraped some skin from his leg, and the
smart gave him courage. He was feeling bitter also, and life seemed to
be a failure just then. There was nothing for it but to grub along and
preach the Gospel in poverty, a very laudable existence, but equally
unsatisfying. He was waking from a golden dream to discover himself in
the cold, just as Brightly dreamed of mythical Jerusalem and remained
upon the dungheap. A little more of such treatment and Eli might have
developed a tendency towards chronic misanthropy.
Pendoggat was amused. He realised that the minister was really
suffering, both in body and mind. Eli was like some wretched rabbit in
the iron jaws of a trap; and Pendoggat was the one who had set the trap,
and was standing over it, able to let the creature out, and intending to
do so, but not until a fair amount of suffering had been exacted.
Pezzack was as much in his power as the rabbit in the hands of the
trapper. He was weak and Pendoggat was strong. Eli was a poor stunted
thing grown in a London back yard; Pendoggat was a tough moorland
growth.
"I reckon you did speak like a fool," he said, while Eli wondered what
he was looking at: himself, the floor, or the granite wall with its
little beads of moisture glistening in the lamplight. "You put it to
them all wrong. If I hadn't stood up they might have got it into their
heads you were trying to trick 'em. You spoke all the time as if you
didn't know what you were talking about. You're a good preacher,
Pezzack, though not outspoken enough, but you're no good at business.
You wouldn't make a living outside the pulpit."
Eli was crushed again. His anger had departed, and he was nursing his
leg and his sorrows patiently. He believed that Pendoggat, with all his
roughness, was a man in whom he could trust. The commoner did not come
with a smooth smile, canting to his face, then departing to play him
false. He behaved like the honest rugged man he was; giving him a rough
grasp of the hand, pushing him off harshly when he hurt him, telling him
plainly of his faults, chiding him for his folly, speaking that which
was in his mind. Eli thought he knew something about human nature, and
that knowledge convinced him that if he should refuse to follow
Pendoggat he would lose his best friend. Pendoggat might behave like a
bear; but there was nothing of the bear about him except the skin.
"I was doing my best. I said all I could, but I know my words must 'ave
sounded poor and foolish," he said mournfully. "Now it's all over, and I
must write to Jeconiah, and tell her we can't be married just yet. It is
a cruel blow, but the things of this world, Mr. Pendoggat, are but as
dross. The moth corrupteth, and the worm nibbleth, and we are shadows
which pass away and come not again." Eli shivered and subsided. He was
mournful, and the interior of Ebenezer was as cold as an ice-house.
Pendoggat came forward and fastened his hands upon Eli's bony shoulders.
He thought it was time to take him out of the trap. The creature was
becoming torpid and indifferent to suffering, and there was no more
pleasure to be obtained from watching it. Besides, he was hungry, and
wanted to get home that his own needs might be satisfied.
"We'll do it yet," he said in his low mumbling voice. "We can get along
quite well without these folks. They haven't got much money, and if any
of 'em had invested a few pounds they would have been after us all the
time and given us no rest. We'll rely on your uncle and his friends. I
reckon they can invest enough among them to start the affair. I'll pull
you through, Pezzack. I'll make a rich man of you yet."
Pendoggat was proving his title to be ranked among the clever men who
are knaves. He had served himself well that evening; by making the
neighbourhood think better of him; by exposing himself to Pezzack as a
man of rough honesty; by rejecting local support, which would always
have been dangerous, and was after all worth little; and by fastening
his hopes upon the grocer of Bromley and his friends, who were a day's
journey distant, were worthy ignorant souls, and could not drop in
casually to ascertain how affairs were progressing. He had also seen the
maggot wriggling in his trap.
"Don't write to the maid," Pendoggat went on. "Have her down and marry
her. It's safe enough. There will be plenty of money coming your way
presently."
Eli looked up. He could not see the speaker because Pendoggat was
standing behind the chair. The minister could see nothing except the
chilly damps of Ebenezer. But his soul was rejoicing. Pendoggat was
making the rough places smooth. "I knew you wouldn't deceive me," he
said. "You gave me your 'and that night in Tavy Cleave, and told me I
could trust you. When you spoke to-night I did not understand, Mr.
Pendoggat. I almost thought you were going to leave me destitute. I will
write to Jeconiah. I shall tell her you are a generous man."
"Why not marry?" muttered Pendoggat. "It will be safe enough. The money
will come. I'll guarantee it."
"There is no immediate necessity, Mr. Pendoggat," said Eli with
ludicrous earnestness. "There has been nothing wrong between us. We are
able to wait. But we desire to enter the 'oly estate. We are always
talking when we meet of the 'appiness that must be found in that
condition. You 'ave always been as good as your word, Mr. Pendoggat. If
you can promise me the money will come, I think--I do really think, my
dear brother, Jeconiah and me might reasonably be welded together in the
bonds of matrimony at a very early date. I might even suggest next
month, Mr. Pendoggat."
Eli was becoming somewhat incoherent and extravagant in speech.
"I'll promise you the money. I'll see you through," said Pendoggat.
The minister could hardly put out the lamps, his hands were shaking so.
He stumbled out of Ebenezer, shivering with delight, and slobbering with
gratitude and benevolence.
Pendoggat went on his way alone. He was walking, and the road took him
beside Lewside Cottage. Rain was still falling, but he did not feel it
because it was being blown against his back. As he came near the cottage
he heard a sound of singing. The blinds had not been drawn down, and the
lamplight passed across the road to melt into the darkness of the moor.
Boodles was singing merrily. She was happy like Eli, and for much the
same reason, only she expressed her happiness in a delightful fashion,
just because she was a nice little girl, and he was only a poor weak
thing of a man. Pendoggat looked in at the window. The child was
standing under the lamp, sewing and singing industriously. The light was
full upon the radiant head. Opposite the window were some great
gorse-bushes, and the yellow blooms with which they were covered came
also within the lamplight. The girl's head and the gorse-flowers were
somewhat similar in colour.
Pendoggat suddenly lifted his stout stick at one of the gorse-bushes,
and struck a quantity of the golden blossoms off it.