As Tony sat at tea with his mother, Janet rushed in to say that Dr.
Stewart had just come home with his daughter, and that she seemed very
weak and ill,--“daunie-like,” as Janet said, “and naething like the braw
lassie that left this twa years ago. They had to help her out o' the
stage; and if it hadna been that Mrs. Harley had gi'en her a glass o'
gooseberry wine, she wad hae fainted.” Janet saw it all, for she had
gone into Coleraine, and the doctor gave her a seat back with himself
and his daughter.
“Poor girl! And is she much changed?” asked Mrs. Butler.
“She's no that changed that I wudna know her,” said Janet, “and that's
all. She has no color in her cheeks nor mirth in her een; and instead of
her merry laugh, that set everybody off, she's just got a little faint
smile that's mair sad than onything else.”
“Of course she's weak; she's had a bad fever, and she's now come off a
long journey,” said Tony, in a sort of rough discontented voice.
“Ay,” muttered Janet; “but I doubt she 'll never be the same she was.”
“To be sure you do,” broke in Tony, rudely. “You would n't belong to
your county here if you did n't look at the blackest side of everything.
This end of our island is as cheerful in its population as it is in
scenery; and whenever we have n't a death in a cabin, we stroll out to
see if there's no sign of a shipwreck on the coast.”
“No such a thing, Master Tony. He that made us made us like ither folk;
and we 're no worse or better than our neighbors.”
“What about the letters, Janet? Did you tell the postmaster that they
're very irregular down here?” asked Mrs. Butler.
“I did, ma'am, and he said ye 're no warse off than others; that when
the Lord sends floods, and the waters rise, human means is a' that we
have; and if the boy couldna swim, the leather bag wi' the letters would
hae gi'en him little help.”
“And could n't he have told ye all that without canting--”
“Tony! Tony!” broke in his mother, reprovingly. “This is not the way to
bear these things, and I will not hear it.”
“Don't be angry, little mother,” said he, taking her hand between both
his own. “I know how rough and ill-tempered I have grown of late; and
though it frets me sorely, I can no more throw it off than I could a
fever.”
“You 'll be soon yourself again, my poor Tony. Your dear father had
his days when none dare go near him but myself; and I remember well Sir
Archy Cole, who was the General, and commanded in Stirling, saying to
me, 'I wish, Mrs. Butler, you would get me the sick-return off Wat's
table, for he's in one of his tantrums to-day, and the adjutant has
not courage to face him.' Many and many a time I laughed to myself over
that.”
“And did you tell this to my father?”
“No, Tony,” said she, with a little dry laugh, “I didn't do that; the
Colonel was a good man, and a God-fearing man; but if he had thought
that anything was said or done because of certain traits or marks in his
own nature, he 'd have been little better than a tiger.”
Tony pondered, or seemed to ponder, over her words, and sat for some
time with his head between his hands. At last he arose hastily, and
said, “I think I'll go over to the Burnside and see the doctor, and I
'll take him that brace of birds I shot to-day.”
“It's a cold night, Tony.”
“What of that, mother? If one waits for fine weather in this climate, I
'd like to know when he 'd go out.”
“There, you are railing again, Tony; and you must not fall into it as a
habit, as people do with profane swearing, so that they cannot utter a
word without blaspheming.”
“Well, the country is beautiful; the weather is more so; the night is a
summer one, and I myself am the most jolly, light-hearted young fellow
from this to anywhere you like. Will that do, little mother?” and he
threw his arm around her, and kissed her fondly. “They 've got a colt up
there at Sir Arthur's that no one can break; but if you saw him in the
paddock, you 'd say there was the making of a strong active horse in
him; and Wylie, the head groom, says he 'd just let him alone, for that
some horses 'break themselves.' Do you know, mother, I half suspect I
am myself one of these unruly cattle, and the best way would be never to
put a cavesson on me?”
Mrs. Butler had not the vaguest conception of what a caves-son meant,
but she said, “I'll not put that nor anything like it on you, Tony; and
I 'll just believe that the son of a loyal gentleman will do nothing to
dishonor a good name.”
“That's right; there you've hit it, mother; now we understand each
other,” cried he, boldly. “I'm to tell the doctor that we expect him and
Dolly to dine with us on Monday, ain't I?”
“Monday or Tuesday, or whenever Dolly is well enough to come.”
“I was thinking that possibly Skeffy would arrive by Tuesday.”
“So he might, Tony, and that would be nice company for him,--the doctor
and Dolly.”
There was something positively comic in the expression of Tory's face as
he heard this speech, uttered in all the simplicity of good faith; but
he forbore to reply, and, throwing a plaid across his shoulders, gave
his habitual little nod of good-bye, and went out. It was a cold starlit
night,--far colder on the sea-shore than in the sheltered valleys
inland. Tony, however, took little heed of this; his thoughts were bent
upon whither he was going; while between times his mother's last words
would flash across him, and once he actually laughed aloud as he said,
“Nice company for Skeffy! Poor mother little knows what company he
keeps, and what fine folk he lives with.”
The minister's cottage lay at the foot of a little hill, beside a small
stream or burn,--a lonesome spot enough, and more than usually dreary in
the winter season; but, as Tony drew nigh, he could make out the mellow
glow of a good fire as the gleam, stealing between the ill-closed
shutters, fell upon the gravel without. “I suppose,” muttered Tony,
“she 's right glad to be at home again, humble as it is;” and then came
another, but not so pleasant thought, “But why did she come back so
suddenly? why did she take this long journey in such a season, and she
so weak and ill?” He had his own dark misgivings about this, but he had
not the courage to face them, even to himself; and now he crept up to
the window and looked in.
A good fire blazed on the hearth; and at one side of it, deep in his
old leather chair,--the one piece of luxury the room possessed,--the
minister lay fast asleep, while opposite to him, on a low stool, sat
Dolly, her head resting on the arm of a chair at her side. If her
closely cropped hair and thin, wan face gave her a look of exceeding
youthful-ness, the thin band that hung down at her side told of
suffering and sickness. A book had fallen from her fingers, but her gaze
was bent upon the burning log before her--mayhap in unconsciousness;
mayhap she thought she read there something that revealed the future.
Lifting the latch--there was no lock, nor was any needed--of the front
door, Tony moved stealthily along the little passage, turned the handle
of the door, and on tiptoe moved across the room, unseen by Dolly, and
unheard. As his hand touched the chair on which her head leaned, she
looked up and saw him. She did not start nor cry out, but a deep crimson
blush covered her face and her temples, and spread over her throat.
“Hush!” said she, in a whisper, as she gave him her hand without rising;
“hush! he's very tired and weary; don't awake him.”
“I 'll not awake him,” whispered Tony, as he slid into the chair, still
holding her hand, and bending down his head till it leaned against her
brow. “And how are you, dear Dolly? Are you getting quite strong again?”
“Not yet awhile,” said she, with a faint shadow of a smile, “but I
suppose I shall soon. It was very kind of you to come over so soon; and
it's a severe night too. How is Mrs. Butler?”
“Well and hearty; she sent you scores of loves,--if it was like long
ago, I 'd have said kisses too,” said he, laughing. But Dolly never
smiled; a grave, sad look, indeed, came over her, and she turned her
head away.
“I was so glad to hear of your coming home, dear Dolly. I can't tell you
how dreary the Burnside seems without you. Ay, pale as you are, you make
it look bright and cheery at once. It was a sudden thought, was n't it?”
“I believe it was; but we 'll talk of it all another time. Tell me of
home. Janet says it's all as I left it: is it so?”
“I suspect it is. What changes did you look for?”
“I scarcely know. I believe when one begins to brood over one's own
thoughts, one thinks the world without ought to take on the same dull
cold coloring. Haven't you felt that?”
“I don't know--I may; but I'm not much given to brooding. But how comes
it that you, the lightest-hearted girl that ever lived--What makes you
low-spirited?”
“First of all, Tony, I have been ill; then, I have been away from home;
but come, I have not come back to complain and mourn. Tell me of your
friends and neighbors. How are all at the Abbey? We'll begin with the
grand folk.”
“I know little of them; I have n't been there since I saw you last.”
“And how is that, Tony? You used to live at the Abbey when I was here
long ago.”
“Well, it is as I tell you. Except Alice Trafford,--and that only in a
carriage, to exchange a word as she passed,--I have not seen one of the
Lyles for several weeks.”
“And didn't she reproach you? Did n't she remark on your estrangement?”
“She said something,--I forget what,” said he, impatiently.
“And what sort of an excuse did you make?”
“I don't remember. I suppose I blundered out something about being
engaged or occupied. It was not of much consequence, anyhow, for she did
n't attach any importance to my absence.”
[Illustration: 266]
“Don't say that, Tony, for I remember my father saying, in one of his
letters, that he met Sir Arthur at the fair of Ballymena, and that he
said, 'If you should see Tony, doctor, tell him I 'm hunting for him
everywhere, for I have to buy some young stock. If I do it without Tony
Butler's advice, I shall have the whole family upon me.'”
“That's easy enough to understand. I was very useful and they were very
kind; but I fancy that each of us got tired of his part.”
“They were stanch and good friends to you, Tony. I 'm sorry you 've
given them up,” said she, sorrowfully.
“What if it was _they_ that gave me up? I mean, what if I found the
conditions upon which I went there were such as I could not stoop to?
Don't ask me any more about it; I have never let a word about it escape
my lips, and I am ashamed now to hear myself talk of it.”
“Even to me, Tony,--to sister Dolly?”
“That's true; so you are my dear, dear sister,” said he, and he
stooped and kissed her forehead; “and you shall hear it all, and how it
happened.”
Tony began his narrative of that passage with Mark Lyle with which our
reader is already acquainted, little noticing that to the deep scarlet
that at first suffused Dolly's cheeks, a leaden pallor had succeeded,
and that she lay with half-closed eyes, in utter unconsciousness of what
he was saying.
“This, of course,” said Tony, as his story flowed on,--“this, of course,
was more than I could bear, so I hurried home, not quite clear what
was best to be done. I had n't _you_, Dolly, to consult, you know;” he
looked down as he said this, and saw that a great tear lay on her cheek,
and that she seemed fainting. “Dolly, my dear,--my own dear Dolly,”
whispered he, “are you ill,--are you faint?”
“Lay my head back against the wall,” sighed she, in a weak voice; “it's
passing off.”
“It was this great fire, I suppose,” said Tony, as he knelt down beside
her, and bathed her temples with some cold water that stood near.
“Coming out of the cold air, a fire will do that.”
“Yes,” said she, trying to smile, “it was that.”
“I thought so,” said he, rather proud of his acuteness. “Let me settle
you comfortably here;” and he lifted her up in his strong arms, and
placed her in the chair where he had been sitting. “Dear me, Dolly, how
light you are!”
She shook her head, but gave a smile, at the same time, of mingled
melancholy and sweetness.
“I 'd never have believed you could be so light; but you 'll see what
home and native air will do,” added he, quickly, and ashamed of his own
want of tact. “My little mother, too, is such a nurse, I 'll be sworn
that before a month's over you 'll be skipping over the rocks, or
helping me to launch the coble, like long ago,--won't you, Dolly?”
“Go on with what you were telling me,” said she, faintly.
“Where was I? I forget where I stopped. Oh, yes; I remember it now. I
went home as quick as I could, and I wrote Mark Lyle a letter. I know
you 'll laugh at the notion of a letter by my hand; but I think I said
what I wanted to say. I did n't want to disclaim all that I owed his
family; indeed I never felt so deeply the kindness they had shown me as
at the moment I was relinquishing it forever; but I told him that if
he presumed, on the score of that feeling, to treat me like some humble
hanger-on of his house, I'd beg to remind him that by birth at least I
was fully his equal. That was the substance of it, but I won't say that
it was conveyed in the purest and best style.”
“What did he reply?”
“Nothing,--not one line. I ought to say that I started for England
almost immediately after; but he took no notice of me when I came back,
and we never met since.”
“And his sisters,--do you suspect that they know of this letter of
yours?”
“I cannot tell, but I suppose not. It's not likely Mark would speak of
it.”
“How, then, do they regard your abstaining from calling there?”
“As a caprice, I suppose. They always thought me a wayward, uncertain
sort of fellow. It's a habit your well-off people have, to look on their
poorer friends as queer and odd and eccentric,--eh, Dolly?”
“There's some truth in the remark, Tony,” said she, smiling; “but I
scarcely expected to hear you come out as a moralist.”
“That's because, like the rest of the world, you don't estimate me at my
true value. I have a great vein of reflection or reflectiveness--which
is it, Dolly? but it 's the deepest of the two--in me, if people only
knew it.”
“You have a great vein of kind-heartedness, and you are a good son to
a good mother,” said she, as a pink blush tinged her cheek, “and I like
that better.”
It was plain that the praise had touched him, and deeply too, for he
drew his hand across his eyes, and his lip trembled as he said, “It was
just about that dear mother I wanted to speak to you, Dolly. You know
I'm going away?”
“My father told me,” said she, with a nod of her head.
“And though, of course, I may manage a short leave now and then to come
over and see her, she 'll be greatly alone. Now, Dolly, you know how she
loves you,--how happy she always is when you come over to us. Will you
promise me that you'll often do so? You used to think nothing of the
walk long ago, and when you get strong and hearty again, you 'll not
think more of it. It would be such a comfort to me, when I am far away,
to feel that you were sitting beside her,--reading to her, perhaps,
or settling those flowers she's so fond of. Ah, Dolly, I'll have that
window that looks out on the white rocks in my mind, and you sitting at
it, many and many a day, when I 'll be hundreds of miles off.”
“I love your mother dearly, Tony; she has been like a mother to myself
for many a year, and it would be a great happiness to me to be with her;
but don't forget, Tony,”--and she tried to smile as she spoke,--“don't
forget that I'll have to go seek my fortune also.”
“And are n't you come to live at home now for good?”
She shook her head with a sorrowful meaning, and said:
“I'm afraid not, Tony. My dear, dear father does not grow richer as he
grows older, and he needs many a little comfort that cannot come of his
own providing, and you know he has none but me.”
The intense sadness of the last few words were deepened by the swimming
eyes and faltering lips of her that uttered them.
“And are you going back to these M'Gruders?”
She shook her head in negative.
“I 'm glad of that I 'm sure they were not kind.”
“Nay, Tony, they were good folk, but after their own fashion; and they
always strove to be just.”
“Another word for being cruel. I 'd like to know what's to become of any
of us in this world if we meet nothing better than Justice. But why did
you leave them?--I mean leave them for good and all.”
She changed color hastily, and turned her head away, while in a low
confused manner she said: “There were several reasons. I need n't
tell you I was n't strong, Tony, and strength is the first element of
governess life.”
“I know how it came about,” broke in Tony. “Don't deny it,--don't,
Dolly. It was all my fault.”
“Don't speak so loud,” whispered she, cautiously.
“It all came of that night I dined at Richmond. But if he hadn't struck
at me--”
“Who struck at you, Tony, my man?” said the old minister, waking up. “He
wasna over-gifted with prudence whoever did it, that I maun say; and how
is Mrs. Butler and how are you yourself?”
“Bravely, sir, both of us. I 've had a long chat with Dolly over the
fire, and I fear I must be going now. I 've brought you a brace of
woodcocks, and a message from my mother about not forgetting to dine
with us on Monday.”
“I don't know about that, Tony. The lassie yonder is very weak just
yet.”
“But after a little rest, eh, Dolly? Don't you think you'd be strong
enough to stroll over by Monday? Then Tuesday be it.”
“We 'll bide and see, Tony,--we 'll bide and see. I'll be able, perhaps,
to tell you after meeting to-morrow; not that you 're very reg'lar in
attendance, Maister Tony; I mean to have a word or two with you about
that one of these days.”
“All right, sir,” said Tony. “If you and Dolly come over to us on
Monday, you may put me on the cutty-stool if you like afterwards;” and
with that he was gone.
“And all this has been my doing,” thought Tony, as he wended his way
homewards. “I have lost to this poor girl the means by which she was
earning her own livelihood, and aiding to make her father's life more
comfortable! I must make her tell me how it all came about, and why they
made her pay the penalty of my fault. Not very fair that for people so
just as they are.” “And to think,” added he, aloud, after a pause,--“to
think it was but the other day I was saying to myself, 'What can people
mean when they talk of this weary world,--this life of care and toil and
anxiety?'--and already I feel as if I stood on the threshold, and peeped
in, and saw it all; but, to be sure, at that time I was cantering along
the strand with Alice, and now--and now I am plodding along a dark
road, with a hot brain and a heavy heart, to tell me that sorrow is sown
broadcast, and none can escape it.”
All was still at the cottage when he reached it, and he crept gently
to his room, and was soon asleep, forgetting cares and griefs, and only
awaking as the strong sunlight fell upon his face and proclaimed the
morning.