Mr. Zzyx behaved beautifully at the very brilliant dinner given in his
honor by Mrs. Cornelius Van Dyk at her town residence, the last red
brick mansion of a remote period, except our own, still left standing
in Washington Square. A dinner made more memorable than it otherwise
would have been by the distinguished array of guests. Among them,
Henry's beloved and revered old friend, the venerable Episcopalian
prelate, Bishop William Buckingham, who had grown a bit queer in his
dotage.
"A very novel idea on the part of our hostess," the Bishop remarked
to Henry after dinner, in the smoking-room, while I sat by, listening
and silent. "This sort of thing was done, years ago, at Newport, a
monkey-dinner, as I recall reading about it, and the clergy and the
newspapers made an awful row. Certainly times have changed when we can
sit down to dinner with a man-ape without the flicker of an eye-lash.
After this, I shan't be at all surprised to have one of my old
parishioners invite me to dine with a white rabbit. Mrs. Van Dyk sets
the fashions in New York, you know."
"After all," remarked Henry, "brutes and humans really belong to one
great family by common descent."
"Hold your miserable tongue, sir!" the Bishop responded, perkily.
"Not until I've extended an invitation to your reverence, to attend
the banquet the Exploration Club is giving for Mr. Zzyx on November
thirtieth," Henry rejoined.
"The Exploration Club! How extraordinary!" the Bishop exclaimed. "The
most exclusive club of its kind in the city. What's up?"
"Oh, just another revelation concerning Mars," Henry replied,
nonchalantly. "You will come, won't you?"
"Do my best to oblige," the Bishop replied.
At that, I felt my ears pricking. I already knew that Henry, Olinski
and McGinity, had something new about Mars up their sleeves, which was
to be disclosed at the banquet at the Exploration Club. What it was,
I had no idea. And I found out nothing that night. The conversation
between the Bishop and Henry was cut short by the return of Mr. Zzyx
and Niki, who had taken our Martian visitor to the lavatory immediately
after dinner, to tidy him up a bit before we left for the opera.
A few moments later, we joined Mrs. Van Dyk, and her house guest, Lady
Gwynne of London, in the drawing room. The other dinner guests had
gone. Both were ready for the opera, Mrs. Van Dyk in a stunning ermine
wrap, and Lady Gwynne in sables.
We had no sooner entered the room, when, to my horror, Mr. Zzyx went
straight up to our hostess, and began to chatter, and stroke her ermine
coat. Then he walked over to Lady Gwynne, and repeated the action on
the sable wrap. I could see that they were both terribly frightened.
Henry took the matter in hand at once, and drew Mr. Zzyx aside,
tenderly, as a father would treat a child of doubtful sanity. After
quieting him with a cigarette, he left him in Niki's care, and
approached Mrs. Van Dyk.
"A bad break, I'm afraid," he said to her, "and I apologize for this
breach of propriety. After all, Mr. Zzyx is part animal, and I'm afraid
the high instinctive animalism in him was beguiled by the sight and
smell of ermine and sable."
"A gesture of Martian jungle courtship," Lady Gwynne suggested.
Henry shook his head. "No; I don't think so," he said. "Mr. Olinski, my
associate, and I, have definitely proved that he is not influenced in
any way by what we mortals call sex appeal. Otherwise, he would be very
objectionable to have about. Pretty clothes, sparkling gems and furs
attract him just as toys intrigue small children. While instinctively
curious, and perhaps a little bold, he means no harm."
"Let's hope he'll keep up this high standard of behavior," the Bishop
remarked. "Undoubtedly a tremendous brute force lies sleeping under his
apparent docility. A pretty go, if this brute force is ever aroused in
him."
"I hope to God that'll never happen," said Henry, gravely.
And then Mrs. Van Dyk spoke. "We can't expect him to measure up to Park
Avenue social standards," she said. "A little clowning now and then is
relished by the best of men. Indeed, I've known men in my own set to go
much further than the mere stroking of a lady's fur coat."
"Exquisite!" laughed the Bishop.
"How droll!" Lady Gwynne commented.
"As a creature from another planet," Mrs. Van Dyk continued, "I feel
very honored in having Mr. Zzyx as a guest in my house."