CHAPTER V

CALCUTTA AND SERAMPORE, 1806

'Now let me burn out for God!' Such were the words with which Henry

Martyn began his ministry to natives and Europeans in North India, as

in the secrecy of prayer he reviewed his first two days in Calcutta.

Chaplain though he was, officially, at the most intolerant time of the

East India Company's administration, he was above all things a

missionary. Charles Simeon had chosen him, and Charles Grant had sent

him out, for this as well as his purely professional duty, and it

never occurred to him that he could be anything else. He burned to

bring all men to the same peace with God and service to Him which he

himself had for seven years enjoyed. We find him recording his great

delight, now at an extract sent to him from the East India Company's

Charter, doubtless the old one from William III., 'authorising and

even requiring me to teach the natives,' and again on receiving a

letter from Corrie, 'exulting with thankfulness and joy that Dr. Kerr

was preaching the Gospel. Eight such chaplains in India! this is

precious news indeed.' Even up to the present time no Christian in

India has ever recognised so fully, or carried out in a brief time so

unrestingly, his duty to natives and Europeans alike as sinners to be

saved by Jesus Christ alone.

Henry Martyn's first Sunday in Calcutta was spent in worship in St.

Johns, the 'new church,' when Mr. Jefferies read one part and Mr.

Limerick another of the service, and Mr. Brown preached. Midday was

spent with 'a pious family where we had some agreeable and religious

conversation, but their wish to keep me from the work of the mission

and retain me at Calcutta was carried farther than mere civility, and

showed an extraordinary unconcern for the souls of the poor heathens.'

In the evening, though unwell with a cold and sore throat, he ventured

to read the service in the mission or old church of Kiernander. He was

there 'agreeably surprised at the number, attention, and apparent

liveliness of the audience. Most of the young ministers that I know

would rejoice to come from England if they knew how attractive every

circumstance is respecting the church.' Next day he was presented at

the levée of Sir George Barlow, acting Governor-General, 'who, after

one or two trifling questions, passed on.' He then spent some time in

the College of Fort William, where he was shown Tipoo's library, and

one of the Mohammedan professors--a colleague of Carey--chanted the

Koran. Thence he was rowed with the tide, in an hour and a half,

sixteen miles up the Hoogli to Aldeen, the house of Rev. David Brown

in the suburb of Serampore, which became his home in Lower Bengal. On

the next two Sundays he preached in the old church of Calcutta, and in

the new church 'officiated at the Sacrament with Mr. Limerick.' It was

on June 8 that he preached in the new church, for the first time, his

famous sermon from 1 Cor. i. 23, 24, on '_Christ crucified, unto the

Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness; but unto them

which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and

the wisdom of God_.'

This is his own account of the immediate result:

_1806, June 8._--The sermon excited no small ferment; however,

after some looks of surprise and whispering, the congregation

became attentive and serious. I knew what I was to be on my

guard against, and therefore, that I might not have my mind full

of idle thoughts about the opinions of men, I prayed both before

and after, that the Word might be for the conversion of souls,

and that I might feel indifferent, except on this score.

We cannot describe the sermon, as it was published after his death,

and again in 1862, more correctly than by comparing it to one of Mr.

Spurgeon's, save that, in style, it is a little more academic and a

little less Saxon or homely. But never before had the high officials

and prosperous residents of Calcutta, who attended the church which

had become 'fashionable' since the Marquess Wellesley set the example

of regular attendance, heard the evangel preached. The chaplains had

been and were of the Arian and Pelagian type common in the Church till

a later period. They at once commenced an assault on their young

colleague and on the doctrines by which Luther and Calvin had reformed

the Churches of Christendom. This was the conclusion of the hated

sermon:

There is, in every congregation, a large proportion of Jews and

Greeks. There are persons who resemble the Jews in

self-righteousness; who, after hearing the doctrines of grace

insisted on for years, yet see no occasion at all for changing

the ground of their hopes. They seek righteousness 'not by

faith, but as it were by the works of the law: for they stumble

at that stumbling-stone' (Rom. ix. 32); or, perhaps, after going

a little way in the profession of the Gospel, they take offence

at the rigour of the practice which we require, as if the

Gospel did not enjoin it. 'This is a hard saying,' they

complain; 'who can hear it?' (John vi. 60), and thus resemble

those who first made the complaint, who 'went back and walked no

more with Him.'

Others come to carp and to criticise. While heretics who deny

the Lord that bought them, open infidels, professed atheists,

grossly wicked men, are considered as entitled to candour,

liberality, and respect, they are pleased to make serious

professors of the Gospel exclusively objects of contempt, and

set down their discourses on the mysteries of faith as idle and

senseless jargon. Alas! how miserably dark and perverse must

they be who think thus of that Gospel which unites all the power

and wisdom of God in it. After God has arranged all the parts of

His plan, so as to make it the best which in His wisdom could be

devised for the restoration of man, how pitiable their stupidity

and ignorance to whom it is foolishness! And, let us add, how

miserable will be their end! because they not only are condemned

already, and the wrath of God abideth on them, but they incur

tenfold danger: they not only remain without a remedy to their

maladies, but have the guilt of rejecting it when offered to

them. This is their danger, that there is always a

stumbling-block in the way: the further they go, the nearer are

they to their fall. They are always exposed to sudden,

unexpected destruction. They cannot foresee one moment whether

they shall stand or fall the next; and when they do fall they

fall at once without warning. Their feet shall slide in due

time. Just shame is it to the sons of men, that He whose delight

it was to do them good, and who so loved them as to shed His

blood for them, should have so many in the world to despise and

reject His offers; but thus is the ancient Scripture

fulfilled--'The natural man receiveth not the things of the

Spirit of God' (1 Cor. ii. 14).

Tremble at your state, all ye that from self-righteousness, or

pride, or unwillingness to follow Him in the regeneration,

disregard Christ! Nothing keeps you one moment from perdition

but the mere sovereign pleasure of God. Yet suppose not that we

take pleasure in contradicting your natural sentiments on

religion, or in giving pain by forcing offensive truths upon

your attention--no! as the ministers of joy and peace we rise up

at the command of God, to preach Christ crucified to you all. He

died for His bitterest enemies: therefore, though ye have been

Jews or Greeks, self-righteous, ignorant, or profane--though ye

have presumed to call His truths in question, treated the Bible

with contempt, or even chosen to prefer an idol to the

Saviour--yet return, at length, before you die, and God is

willing to forgive you.

How happy is the condition of those who obey the call of the

Gospel. Their hope being placed on that way of salvation which

is the _power_ and _wisdom_ of God, on what a broad, firm basis

doth it rest! Heaven and earth may pass away, though much of the

power and wisdom of God was employed in erecting that fabric;

but the power and wisdom themselves of God must be cut off from

His immutable essence, and pass away, before one tittle of your

hope can fail. Then rejoice, ye children of Wisdom, by whom she

is justified. Happy are your eyes, for they see; and your ears,

for they hear; and the things which God hath hidden from the

wise and prudent, He hath revealed unto you. Ye were righteous

in your own esteem; but ye 'count all things but loss for the

excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus our Lord.' Then be

not ashamed of the Gospel of Christ, 'which is the power of God

unto salvation unto every one that believeth'; but continue to

display its efficacy by the holiness of your lives, and live

rejoicing in hope of the glory of God.

The opposition of the officers and many of the troops on board the

transport had made the preacher familiar with attack and misrepresentation,

but not less faithful in expounding the Gospel of the grace of God as he

himself had received it to his joy, and for his service to the death. But

the ministrations of David Brown for some years might have been expected

to have made the civilians and merchants of Calcutta more tolerant, if not

more intelligent. They were, however, incited or led by the two other

chaplains thus:

_1806, June 16._--Heard that Dr. Ward had made an intemperate

attack upon me yesterday at the new church, and upon all the

doctrines of the Gospel. I felt like the rest, disposed to be

entertained at it; but I knew it to be wrong, and therefore

found it far sweeter to retire and pray, with my mind fixed upon

the more awful things of another world.

_June 22._--Attended at the new church, and heard Mr. Jefferies

on the evidences of Christianity. I had laboured much in prayer

in the morning that God would be pleased to keep my heart during

the service from thinking about men, and I could say as I was

going, 'I will go up to Thy house in the multitude of Thy

mercies, and in Thy fear will I worship toward Thy holy temple.'

In public worship I was rather more heavenly-minded than on

former occasions, yet still vain and wandering. At night

preached on John x. 11: 'I am the good shepherd;' there was

great attention. Yet felt a little dejected afterwards, as if I

always preached without doing good.

_July 6._--Laboured to have my mind impressed with holy things,

particularly because I expected to have a personal attack from

the pulpit. Mr. Limerick preached from 2 Pet. i. 13, and spoke

with sufficient plainness against me and my doctrines. Called

them inconsistent, extravagant, and absurd. He drew a vast

variety of false inferences from the doctrines, and thence

argued against the doctrines themselves. To say that repentance

is the gift of God was to induce men to sit still and wait for

God. To teach that Nature was wholly corrupt was to lead men to

despair; that men thinking the righteousness of Christ

sufficient to justify, will account it unnecessary to have any

of their own: this last assertion moved me considerably, and I

started at hearing such downright heresy. He spoke of me as one

of those who understand neither what they say nor whereof they

affirm, and as speaking only to gratify self-sufficiency, pride,

and uncharitableness. I rejoiced at having the sacrament of the

Lord's Supper afterwards, as the solemnities of that blessed

ordinance sweetly tended to soothe the asperities and dissipate

the contempt which was rising; and I think I administered the

cup to ---- and ---- with sincere good-will. At night I preached

on John iv. 10, at the mission church, and, blessed be God! with

an enlarged heart. I saw ---- in tears, and that encouraged me

to hope that perhaps some were savingly affected, but I feel no

desire except that my God should be glorified. If any are

awakened at hearing me, let me not hear of it if I should glory.

_August 24._--At the new church, Mr. Jefferies preached. I

preached in the evening on Matt. xi. 28, without much heart, yet

the people as attentive as possible.

_August 25._--Called on Mr. Limerick and Mr. Birch; with the

latter I had a good deal of conversation on the practicability

of establishing schools, and uniting in a society. An officer

who was there took upon him to call in question the lawfulness

of interfering with the religion of the natives, and said that

at Delhi the Christians were some of the worst people there. I

was glad at the prospect of meeting with these Christians. The

Lord enabled me to speak boldly to the man, and to silence him.

From thence I went to the Governor-General's levée, and received

great attention from him, as, indeed, from most others here.

Perhaps it is a snare of Satan to stop my mouth, and make me

unwilling to preach faithfully to them. The Lord have mercy,

and quicken me to diligence.

_August 26._--At night Marshman came, and our conversation was

very refreshing and profitable. Truly the love of God is the

happiness of the soul! My soul felt much sweetness at this

thought, and breathed after God. At midnight Marshman came to

the pagoda, and awakened me with the information that Sir G.

Barlow had sent word to Carey not to disperse any more tracts

nor send out more native brethren, or in any way interfere with

the prejudices of the natives. We did not know what to make of

this; the subject so excited me that I was again deprived of

necessary sleep.

_August 28._--Enjoyed much comfort in my soul this morning, and

ardour for my work, but afterwards consciousness of indolence

and unprofitableness made me uneasy. In the evening Mr.

Marshman, Ward, Moore, and Rowe came up and talked with us on

the Governor's prohibition of preaching the Gospel, &c. Mr.

Brown's advice was full of wisdom, and weighed with them all. I

was exceedingly excited, and spoke with vehemence against the

measures of government, which afterwards filled me justly with

shame.

The earnestness of the young chaplain was such that 'the people of

Calcutta,' or all the Evangelicals, joined even by the Baptist

missionaries at Serampore, gave him no rest that he might consent to

become minister of the mission or old church, with a chaplain's salary

and house. Dr. Marshman urged that thus he might create a missionary

spirit and organise missionary undertakings of more value to the

natives than the preaching of any one man. But he remained deaf to the

temptation, while he passed on the call to Cousin T. Hitchins and

Emma, at Plymouth. His call was not to preach even in the metropolis

of British India, the centre of Southern Asia; but, through their own

languages, to set in motion a force which must win North India,

Arabia, and Persia to Christ, while by his death he should stir up the

great Church of England to do its duty.

[Illustration: PAGODA, ALDEEN HOUSE]

Serampore was the scene of his praying, his communing, and his

studying, while every Sunday was given to his duties in Calcutta, as

he waited five months for his first appointment to a military station.

David Brown had not long before acquired Aldeen House, with its

tropical garden and English-like lawn sloping down to the river,

nearly opposite the Governor-General's summer-house and park of

Barrackpore. Connected with the garden was the old and architecturally

picturesque temple of the idol Radha-bullub, which had been removed

farther inland because the safety of the shrine was imperilled by the

river. But the temple still stands, in spite of the rapid Hoogli at

its base, and the more destructive peepul tree which has spread over

its massive dome. In 1854, when the present writer first visited the

now historic spot, even the platform above the river was secure, but

that has since disappeared, with much of the fine brick moulding and

tracery work. Here was the young saint's home; ever since it has been

known as Henry Martyn's Pagoda, and has been an object of interest to

hundreds of visitors from Europe and America.

[Illustration: A BRICK FROM HENRY MARTYN'S PAGODA]

Henry Martyn became one of David Brown's family, with whom he kept up

the most loving correspondence almost to his death. But he spent even

more time with the already experienced missionaries who formed the

famous brotherhood a little farther up the right bank of the Hoogli.

Carey thus wrote of him, knowing nothing of the fact that it was his

own earlier reports which, in Simeon's hands, had first led Martyn to

desire the missionary career: 'A young clergyman, Mr. Martyn, is

lately arrived, who is possessed of a truly missionary spirit. He

lives at present with Mr. Brown, and as the image or shadow of bigotry

is not known among us here, we take sweet counsel together and go to

the house of God as friends.' Later on, the founder of the Modern

Missionary enterprise, who desired to send a missionary to every great

centre in North India, declared of the Anglican chaplain that,

wherever he went no other missionary would be needed. The late Mr.

John Clark Marshman, C.S.I., who as a lad saw them daily, wrote: 'A

strong feeling of sympathy drew him into a close intimacy with Dr.

Marshman, and they might be often seen walking arm in arm, for hours

together, on the banks of the river between Aldeen House and the

Mission House.' To the last he addressed Dr. Marshman, in frequent

letters, as his 'dear brother,' anticipating the catholic tenderness

of Bishop Heber.[22] Martyn attended those family lectures of Ward on

the Hindus which resulted in his great book on the subject. In the

Pagoda, 'Carey, Marshman, and Ward joined in the same chorus of praise

with Brown, Martyn, and Corrie.' Martyn himself gives us these

exquisite unconscious pictures of Christian life in Serampore, in

which all true missionaries face to face with the common enemy have

followed the giants of those days.

_1806, May 19._--In the cool of the evening we walked to the

mission-house, a few hundred yards off, and I at last saw the

place about which I have so long read with pleasure. I was

introduced to all the missionaries. We sat down about one

hundred and fifty to tea, at several long tables in an immense

room. After this there was evening service in another room

adjoining, by Mr. Ward. Mr. Marshman then delivered his lecture

on grammar. As his observations were chiefly confined to the

Greek, and seemed intended for the young missionaries, I was

rather disappointed, having expected to hear something about the

Oriental languages. With Mr. M. alone I had much conversation,

and received the first encouragement to be a missionary that I

have met with since I came to this country. I blessed God in my

heart for this seasonable supply of refreshment. Finding my sore

throat and cough much increased, I thought there might be some

danger, and felt rather low at the prospect of death. I could

scarcely tell why. The constant uneasiness I am in from the

bites of the mosquitoes made me rather fretful also. My

habitation assigned me by Mr. Brown is a pagoda in his grounds,

on the edge of the river. Thither I retired at night, and really

felt something like superstitious dread at being in a place once

inhabited, as it were, by devils, but yet felt disposed to be

triumphantly joyful that the temple where they were worshipped

was become Christ's oratory. I prayed out aloud to my God, and

the echoes returned from the vaulted roof. Oh, may I so pray

that the dome of heaven may resound! I like my dwelling much, it

is so retired and free from noise; it has so many recesses and

cells that I can hardly find my way in and out.

_May 20._--Employed in preparing a sermon for to-morrow, and

while walking about for this purpose, my body and mind active,

my melancholy was a little relieved by the hope that I should

not be entirely useless as a missionary. In the evening I walked

with Mr. Brown, to see the evening worship at a pagoda whither

they say the god who inhabited my pagoda retired some years ago.

As we walked through the dark wood which everywhere covers the

country, the cymbals and drums struck up, and never did sounds

go through my heart with such horror in my life. The pagoda was

in a court, surrounded by a wall, and the way up to it was by a

flight of steps on each side. The people to the number of about

fifty were standing on the outside, and playing the instruments.

In the centre of the building was the idol, a little ugly black

image, about two feet high, with a few lights burning round him.

At intervals they prostrated themselves with their foreheads to

the earth. I shivered at being in the neighbourhood of hell; my

heart was ready to burst at the dreadful state to which the

Devil had brought my poor fellow-creatures. I would have given

the world to have known the language, to have preached to them.

At this moment Mr. Marshman arrived, and my soul exulted that

the truth would now be made known. He addressed the Brahmins

with a few questions about the god; they seemed to be all agreed

with Mr. Marshman, and quite ashamed at being interrogated, when

they knew they could give no answer. They were at least mute,

and would not reply; and when he continued speaking they struck

up again with their detestable music, and so silenced him. We

walked away in sorrow, but the scene we had witnessed gave rise

to a very profitable conversation, which lasted some hours.

Marshman in conversation with me alone sketched out what he

thought would be the most useful plan for me to pursue in India;

which would be to stay in Calcutta a year to learn the language,

and when I went up the country to take one or two native

brethren with me, to send them forth, and preach occasionally

only to confirm their word, to establish schools, and visit

them. He said I should do far more good in the way of influence

than merely by actual preaching. After all, whatever God may

appoint, prayer is the great thing. Oh, that I may be a man of

prayer; my spirit still struggles for deliverance from all my

corruptions.

_May 22._--In our walk at sunset, met Mr. Marshman, with whom I

continued talking about the languages. Telling Mr. Brown about

my Cambridge honours, I found my pride stirred, and bitterly

repented having said anything about it. Surely the increase of

humility need not be neglected when silence may do it.

_May 23._--Was in general in a spiritual, happy frame the whole

day, which I cannot but ascribe to my being more diligent and

frequent in prayer over the Scriptures, so that it is the

neglect of this duty that keeps my soul so low. Began the

Bengali grammar, and got on considerably. Continued my letters

to Mr. Simeon and Emma. At night we attended a conference of the

missionaries on this subject: 'Whether God could save sinners

without the death of Christ.' Messrs. Carey, Marshman, and Ward

spoke, Mr. Brown and myself. I offered what might be said on the

opposite side of the question to that which the rest took, to

show that He might have saved them without Christ. About

fourteen of the Bengali brethren were present and spoke on the

subject. Ram Roteen prayed.

_Monday, May 26._--Went up to Serampore with Mr. Brown, with

whom I had much enlivening conversation. Why cannot I be like

Fletcher and Brainerd, and those men of modern times? Is

anything too hard for the Lord? Cannot my stupid stony heart be

made to flame with love and zeal? What is it that bewitches me,

that I live such a dying life? My soul groans under its bondage.

In the evening Marshman called; I walked back with him, and was

not a little offended at his speaking against the use of a

liturgy. I returned full of grief at the offences which arise

amongst men, and determined to be more alone with the blessed

God.

_May 29._--Had some conversation with Marshman alone on the

prospects of the Gospel in this country, and the state of

religion in our hearts, for which I felt more anxious.

Notwithstanding, I endeavoured to guard against prating only to

display my experience; I found myself somewhat ruffled by the

conversation, and derived no benefit from it, but felt desirous

only to get away from the world, and to cease from men; my pride

was a little hurt by Marshman's questioning me as the merest

novice. He probably sees farther into me than I see into myself.

_June 12._--Still exceedingly feeble; endeavoured to think on a

subject, and was much irritated at being unable to write a word.

Mrs. Brown, and afterwards Mr. Brown, paid me a visit. I came

into the house to dinner, but while there I felt as if fainting

or dying, and indeed really thought I was departing this life. I

was brought back again to the pagoda, and then on my bed I began

to pray as on the verge of eternity. The Lord was pleased to

break my hard heart, and deliver me from that satanic spirit of

light and arrogant unconcern about which I groaned out my

complaint to God. From this time I lay in tears, interceding for

the unfortunate natives of this country; thinking with myself,

that the most despised Soodra of India was of as much value, in

the sight of God, as the King of Great Britain: through the rest

of the day my soul remained in a spirit of contrition.

_June 14._--A pundit came to me this morning, but after having

my patience tried with him, I was obliged to send him away, as

he knew nothing about Hindustani. I was exceedingly puzzled to

know how I should ever be able to acquire any assistance in

learning these languages. Alas! what trials are awaiting me.

Sickness and the climate have increased the irritability of my

temper, and occasions of trying it occur constantly. In the

afternoon, while pleading for a contrite tender spirit, but in

vain, I was obliged to cease praying for that tenderness of

spirit, and to go on to other petitions, and by this means was

brought to a more submissive state. Officiated at evening

worship.

_June 15._--Found my mouth salivated this morning from calomel.

Attended the morning service at the mission-house; Mr. Marsdon

preached. After service Marshman and Carey talked with me in the

usual cheering way about missionary things, but my mind was

dark. In the afternoon was rather more comfortable in prayer,

and at evening worship was assisted to go through the duties of

it with cheerfulness. Read some of Whitfield's _Sermons_.

_June 19._--Rose in gloom, but that was soon dissipated by

consideration and prayer. Began after breakfast for the first

time with a moonshi, a Cashmerian Brahmin, with whom I was much

pleased. In the boat, back to Serampore, learning roots.

Officiated at evening worship. Walked at night with Marshman and

Mr. Brown to the bazaar held at this time of the year, for the

use of the people assembling at Juggernaut. The booth or

carriage was fifty feet high, in appearance a wooden temple,

with rows of wheels through the centre of it. By the side of

this a native brother who attended Marshman gave away papers,

and this gave occasion to disputes, which continued a

considerable time between Marshman and the Brahmins. Felt

somewhat hurt at night at ----'s insinuating that my low

spirits, as he called it, was owing to want of diligence. God

help me to be free from this charge, and yet not desirous to

make a show before men. May I walk in sweet and inward communion

with Him, labouring with never-ceasing diligence and care, and

assured that I shall not live or labour in vain.

_June 24._--At daylight left Calcutta, and had my temper greatly

exercised by the neglects and improper behaviour of the servants

and boatmen. Arrived at Serampore at eight, and retired to my

pagoda, intending to spend the day in fasting and prayer; but

after a prayer in which the Lord helped me to review with sorrow

the wickedness of my past life, I was so overcome with fatigue

that I fell asleep, and thus lost the whole morning; so I gave

up my original intention. Passed the afternoon in translating

the second chapter of St. Matthew into Hindustani. Had a long

conversation at night with Marshman, whose desire now is that I

should stay at Serampore, give myself to the study of Hindustani

for the sake of the Scriptures, and be ready to supply the place

of Carey and Marshman in the work, should they be taken off; and

for another reason--that I might awaken the attention of the

people of God in Calcutta more to missionary subjects. I was

struck with the importance of having proper persons here to

supply the place of these two men; but could not see that it was

the path God designed for me. I felt, however, a most impatient

desire that some of my friends should come out and give

themselves to the work; for which they are so much more fit in

point of learning than any of the Dissenters are, and could not

bear that a work of such stupendous magnitude should be

endangered by their neglect and love of the world. Marshman

recommended that the serious people in Calcutta should unite in

a society for the support of missions, and each subscribe fifty

rupees a month for their maintenance. Ten members with this

subscription could support sixty or seventy native brethren. He

wished me also to see the duty of their all remaining in the

country, learning the language, and instructing their servants.

My mind was so filled and excited by the first part of our

conversation, that I could not sleep for many hours after going

to bed. He told me that the people were surfeited with the

Gospel, and that they needed to be exhorted to duty.

_June 26._--Employed in translating St. Matthew into Hindustani,

and reading Mirza's translation; afterwards had moonshi a

little. In the afternoon walked with Mr. Brown to see

Juggernaut's car drawn back to its pagoda. Many thousands of

people were present, rending the air with acclamations. The car

with the tower was decorated with a vast number of flags, and

the Brahmins were passing to and fro through the different

compartments of it, catching the offerings of fruit, cowries,

&c., that were thrown up to the god, for which they threw down

in return small wreaths of flowers, which the people wore round

their necks and in their hair. When the car stopped at the

pagoda, the god and two attending deities were let down by

ropes, muffled up in red cloths, a band of singers with drums

and cymbals going round the car while this was performed. Before

the stumps of images, for they were not better, some of the

people prostrated themselves, striking the ground twice with

their foreheads; this excited more horror in me than I can well

express, and I was about to stammer out in Hindustani, 'Why do

ye these things?' and to preach the Gospel. The words were on my

lips--though if I had spoken thousands would have crowded round

me, and I should not have been understood. However, I felt my

spirit more inflamed with zeal than I ever conceived it would

be; and I thought that if I had words I would preach to the

multitudes all the day, if I lost my life for it. It was curious

how the women clasped their hands, and lifted them up as if in

the ecstasy of devotion, while Juggernaut was tumbled about in

the most clumsy manner before their eyes. I thought with some

sorrow that Satan may exert the same influence in exciting

apparently religious affections in professors of the Gospel, in

order to deceive souls to their eternal ruin. Dr. Taylor and Mr.

Moore joined us, and distributed tracts. Mr. Ward, we heard, was

at a distance preaching. On our return we met Marshman going

upon the same errand. In evening worship my heart was rather

drawn out for the heathen, and my soul in general through the

day enjoyed a cheering sense of God's love. Marshman joined us

again, and our conversation was about supporting some native

missions.

_June 30._--Went up to Serampore in the boat, learning roots.

Spent the afternoon chiefly in prayer, of which my soul stood

greatly in need through the snares into which my heart had been

falling. Called at the mission-house, and saw Mr. Marsdon

previous to the commencement of his missionary career. Now the

plans of God are, I trust, taking another step forward.

_July 2._--Mr. Brown proposed a prayer meeting between ourselves

and the missionaries previous to the departure of Dr. Taylor for

Surat. It was a season of grace to my soul, for some sense of

the vast importance of the occasion dwelt upon my mind in

prayer, and I desired earnestly to live zealously, labouring for

souls in every possible way, with more honesty and openness. In

the evening went to Marshman, and proposed it. There were at his

house many agreeable sights; one pundit was translating

Scripture into Sanskrit, another into Guzerati, and a table was

covered with materials for a Chinese dictionary. Employed with

moonshi in Hindu Story-teller, and in learning to write the

Persian characters.

_July 3._--Rose with some happiness in my soul, and delight in

the thought of an increase of labour in the Church of God.

Employed morning as usual, and in thinking of subject for

sermon. Was detained in the house at a time when I wanted

prayer. In the evening walked with the family through Serampore,

the native's part. At night we had a delightful spiritual

conversation. Thus my time passes most agreeably in this dear

family. Lord, let me be willing to leave it and the world with

joy.

_July 8._--Reading with moonshi all the morning. Spent the

afternoon in reading and prayer, as preparatory to a meeting of

the missionaries at night. At eight, ten of us met in my pagoda.

It was, throughout, a soul-refreshing ordinance to me. I felt as

I wished, as if having done with the world, and standing on the

very verge of heaven, rejoicing at the glorious work which God

will accomplish on the earth. The Lord will, I hope, hear our

prayers for our dear brother, on whose account we met, previous

to his departure for Surat. An idea thrown out by Carey pleased

me very much, not on account of its practicability, but its

grandeur, _i.e._ that there should be an annual meeting, at the

Cape of Good Hope, of all the missionaries in the world.

_July 9._--Dull and languid from the exertions and late hours of

yesterday. Reading the Sermon on the Mount, in the Hindustani

Testament, with moonshi. In the evening went to the

mission-house, drank tea, and attended their worship. These

affectionate souls never fail to mention me particularly in

their prayers, but I am grieved that they so mistake my

occasional warmth for zeal. It is one of the things in which I

am most low and backward, as the Lord, who seeth in secret,

knows too well. Oh, then, may any who think it worth while to

take up my name into their lips, pray for the beginning rather

than the continuance of zeal! Marshman, in my walk with him,

kindly assured me of his great regard and union of heart with

me. I would that I had more gratitude to God, for so putting it

into the hearts of His people to show regard to one so

undeserving of it. At night had much nearness to God in prayer.

I found it sweet to my spirit to reflect on my being a pilgrim

on earth, with Christ for my near and dear friend, and found

myself unwilling to leave off my prayer.

_July 10._--Employed during the morning with moonshi. At morning

and evening worship enjoyed freedom of access to God in prayer.

Mr. Brown's return in the evening, with another Christian

friend, added greatly to my pleasure. Marshman joined us at

night, but these enjoyments, from being too eagerly entered

into, often leave my soul carnally delighted only, instead of

bringing me nearer to God. Wrote sermon at night.

_July 12._--Most of this morning employed about sermon. In the

afternoon went down to Calcutta with Mr. Brown and all his

family; we passed the time very agreeably in singing hymns.

Found Europe letters on our arrival, but were disappointed in

not finding Corrie or Parson in the list of passengers. My

letters were from Lydia, T.H. and Emma, Mr. Simeon, and Sargent.

All their first letters had been taken in the Bell Packet. I

longed to see Lydia's, but the Lord saw it good, no doubt, not

to suffer it to arrive. The one I did receive from her was very

animating, and showed the extraordinary zeal and activity of her

mind. Mr. Simeon's letter contained her praises, and even he

seemed to regret that I had gone without her. My thoughts were

so occupied with these letters that I could get little or no

sleep.

_July 13._ (Sunday.)--Talked to Mr. Brown about Lydia, and read

her letter to him. He strongly recommended the measure of

endeavouring to bring her here, and was clear that my future

situation in the country would be such as to make it necessary

to be married. A letter from Colonel Sandys, which he opened

afterwards, spoke in the highest terms of her. The subject of

marriage was revived in my mind, but I feel rather a reluctance

to it. I enjoy in general such sweet peace of mind, from

considering myself a stranger upon earth, unconnected with any

persons, unknown, forgotten, that were I never thrown into any

more trying circumstances than I am in at present, no change

could add to my happiness. At the new church this morning, had

the happiness of hearing Mr. Jefferies preach. I trust God will

graciously keep him, and instruct him, and make him another

witness of Jesus in this place. My heart was greatly refreshed,

and rejoiced at it all the day. At night preached at the

missionary church, on Eph. ii. 1-3, to a small congregation. Sat

up late with Mr. Brown, considering the same subject as we had

been conversing on before, and it dwelt so much on my mind that

I got hardly any sleep the whole night.

_July 14._--The same subject engrosses my whole thoughts. Mr.

Brown's arguments appear so strong that my mind is almost made

up to send for Lydia. I could scarcely have any reasonable

doubts remaining, that her presence would most abundantly

promote the ends of the mission.

_July 15._--Most of the day with moonshi; at intervals, thinking

on subject for sermon. My affections seemed to be growing more

strong towards Lydia than I could wish, as I fear my judgment

will no longer remain unbiassed. The subject is constantly on my

mind, and imagination heightens the advantages to be obtained

from her presence. And yet, on the other hand, there is such a

sweet happiness in living unconnected with any creature, and

hastening through this life with not one single attraction to

detain my desires here, that I am often very unwilling to

exchange a life of celibacy for one of which I know nothing,

except that it is in general a life of care.

_July 16._--Morning with moonshi; afterwards preparing myself

for church. Preached at night, at missionary church, on Isa.

lxiii. 1. Both in prayers and sermon I felt my heart much more

affected than I expected, and there seemed to be some impression

on a few of the people. I feel to be thankful to God, and

grateful to the people, that they continue to hear me with such

attention. My thoughts this day have been rather averse to

marriage. Anxiety about the education and conversion of children

rather terrifies me.

_July 20._ (Sunday.)--Preached at the new church on 2 Cor. v.

17. Mr. Marshman dined with us, and at four I went to the

bazaar, to hear him preach to the natives. I arrived at the shed

before him, and found the native brethren singing, after which

one of them got up, and addressed the people with such firmness

and mild energy, notwithstanding their occasional contradictions

and ridicule, that I was quite delighted and refreshed. To see a

native Indian an earnest advocate for Jesus, how precious!

Marshman afterwards came, and prayed, sung, and preached. If I

were to be very severe with him, I should say that there is a

want of seriousness, tenderness, and dignity in his address, and

I felt pained that he should so frequently speak with contempt

of the Brahmins, many of whom were listening with great respect

and attention. The group presented all that variety of

countenance which the Word is represented as producing in a

heathen audience--some inattentive, others scornful, and others

seemingly melting under it. Another native brother, I believe,

then addressed them. An Indian sermon about Jesus Christ was

like music on my ear, and I felt inflamed to begin my work:

these poor people possess more intelligence and feeling than I

thought. At the end of the service there was a sort of uproar

when the papers were given away, and the attention of the

populace and of some Europeans was excited. Read prayers at

night at the missionary church; Mr. Brown preached on the

unspeakable gift.

_July 21._--Returned to Serampore rather in a low state of mind,

arising from deprivation of a society of which I had been too

fond.

_July 22._--Read Hindustani without moonshi. Not being able to

get to the pagoda from the incessant rain, I passed the latter

part of the day in the house, reading the life of Francis

Xavier. I was exceedingly roused at the astonishing example of

that great saint, and began to consider whether it was not my

duty to live, as he did, in voluntary poverty and celibacy. I

was not easy till I had determined to follow the same course,

when I should perceive that the kingdom of God would be more

advanced by it. At night I saw the awful necessity of being no

longer slothful, nor wasting my thoughts about such trifles as

whether I should be married or not, and felt a great degree of

fear, lest the blood of the five thousand Mohammedans, who, Mr.

Brown said, were to be found in Calcutta capable of

understanding a Hindustani sermon, should be required at my

hand.

_July 25._--The thought of the Mohammedans and heathens lies

very heavy upon my mind. The former, who are in Calcutta, I seem

to think are consigned to me by God, because nobody preaches in

Hindustani. Employed the morning in sermon and Hindustani. In

the afternoon went down to Calcutta. In the boat read Wrangham's

Essay and some of Mr. Lloyd's letters, when young. What

knowledge have some believers of the deep things of God! I felt

myself peculiarly deficient in that experimental knowledge of

Christ with which Mr. Lloyd was particularly favoured. Walked

from the landing-place, a mile and a half, through the native

part of Calcutta, amidst crowds of Orientals of all nations. How

would the spirit of St. Paul have been moved! The thought of

summoning the attention of such multitudes appeared very

formidable, and during the course of the evening was the

occasion of many solemn thoughts and prayer, that God would

deliver me from all softness of mind, fear, and

self-indulgence, and make me ready to suffer shame and death for

the name of the Lord Jesus.

_July 26._--My soul in general impressed with the awfulness of

my missionary work, and often shrinking from its difficulties.

_July 28._--In the boat to Serampore we read Mitchell's Essay on

_Evangelizing India_, and were much pleased and profited.

Whatever plans and speculations may be agitated, I felt it my

duty to think only of putting my hand to the work without delay.

Felt very unhappy at having other work put upon me, which will

keep me from making progress in the language. Nothing but

waiting upon God constantly for direction, and an assurance that

His never-ceasing love will direct my way, would keep me from

constant vexation. I scarcely do anything in the language, from

having my time so constantly taken up with writing sermons.

_July 29._--Much of this morning taken up in writing to Lydia.

As far as my own views extend, I feel no doubt at all about the

propriety of the measure--of at least proposing it. May the

Lord, in continuance of His loving-kindness to her and me,

direct her mind, that if she comes I may consider it as a

special gift from God, and not merely permitted by Him. Marshman

sat with us in the evening, and as usual was teeming with plans

for the propagation of the Gospel. Stayed up till midnight in

finishing the letter to Lydia.

TO LYDIA GRENFELL

Serampore: July 30, 1806.

My dearest Lydia,--On a subject so intimately connected with my

happiness and future ministry, as that on which I am now about

to address you, I wish to assure you that I am not acting with

precipitancy, or without much consideration and prayer, while I

at last sit down to request you to come out to me to India.

May the Lord graciously direct His blind and erring creature,

and not suffer the natural bias of his mind to lead him astray.

You are acquainted with much of the conflict I have undergone on

your account. It has been greater than you or Emma have

imagined, and yet not so painful as I deserve to have found it

for having suffered my affections to fasten so inordinately on

an earthly object.

Soon, however, after my final departure from Europe, God in

great mercy gave me deliverance, and favoured me throughout the

voyage with peace of mind, indifference about all worldly

connections, and devotedness to no object upon earth but the

work of Christ. I gave you up entirely--not the smallest

expectation remained in my mind of ever seeing you again till we

should meet in heaven: and the thought of this separation was

the less painful from the consolatory persuasion that our own

Father had so ordered it for our mutual good. I continued from

that time to remember you in my prayers only as a Christian

sister, though one very dear to me. On my arrival in this

country I saw no reason at first for supposing that marriage was

advisable for a missionary--or rather the subject did not offer

itself to my mind. The Baptist missionaries indeed recommended

it, and Mr. Brown; but not knowing any proper person in this

country, they were not very pressing upon the subject, and I

accordingly gave no attention to it. After a very short

experience and inquiry afterwards, my own opinions began to

change, and when a few weeks ago we received your welcome

letter, and others from Mr. Simeon and Colonel Sandys, both of

whom spoke of you in reference to me, I considered it even as a

call from God to satisfy myself fully concerning His will. From

the account which Mr. Simeon received of you from Mr. Thomason,

he seemed in his letter to me to regret that he had so strongly

dissuaded me from thinking about you at the time of my leaving

England. Colonel Sandys spoke in such terms of you, and of the

advantages to result from your presence in this country, that

Mr. Brown became very earnest for me to endeavour to prevail

upon you. Your letter to me perfectly delighted him, and induced

him to say that you would be the greatest aid to the mission I

could possibly meet with. I knew my own heart too well not to be

distrustful of it, especially as my affections were again

awakened, and accordingly all my labour and prayer have been to

check their influence, that I might see clearly the path of

duty.

Though I dare not say that I am under no bias, yet from every

view of the subject I have been able to take, after balancing

the advantages and disadvantages that may ensue to the cause in

which I am engaged, always in prayer for God's direction, my

reason is fully convinced of the expediency, I had almost said

the necessity, of having you with me. It is possible that my

reason may still be obscured by passion; let it suffice,

however, to say that now with a safe conscience and the

enjoyment of the Divine presence, I calmly and deliberately make

the proposal to you--and blessed be God if it be not His will to

permit it; still this step is not advancing beyond the limits of

duty, because there is a variety of ways by which God can

prevent it, without suffering any dishonour to His cause. If He

shall forbid it, I think that, by His grace, I shall even then

be contented and rejoice in the pleasure of corresponding with

you. Your letter, dated December 1805, was the first I received

(your former having been taken in the Bell Packet), and I found

it so animating that I could not but reflect on the blessedness

of having so dear a counsellor always near me. I can truly say,

and God is my witness, that my principal desire in this affair

is that you may promote the kingdom of God in my own heart, and

be the means of extending it to the heathen. My own earthly

comfort and happiness are not worth a moment's notice. I would

not, my dearest Lydia, influence you by any artifices or false

representations. I can only say that if you have a desire of

being instrumental in establishing the blessed Redeemer's

kingdom among these poor people, and will condescend to do it by

supporting the spirits and animating the zeal of a weak

messenger of the Lord, who is apt to grow very dispirited and

languid, 'Come, and the Lord be with you!' It can be nothing but

a sacrifice on your part, to leave your valuable friends to come

to one who is utterly unworthy of you or any other of God's

precious gifts: but you will have your reward, and I ask it not

of you or of God for the sake of my own happiness, but only on

account of the Gospel. If it be not calculated to promote it,

may God in His mercy withhold it. For the satisfaction of your

friends, I should say that you will meet with no hardships. The

voyage is very agreeable, and with the people and country of

India I think you will be much pleased. The climate is very

fine--the so much dreaded heat is really nothing to those who

will employ their minds in useful pursuits. Idleness will make

people complain of everything. The natives are the most harmless

and timid creatures I ever met with. The whole country is the

land of plenty and peace. Were I a missionary among the

Esquimaux or Boschemen, I should never dream of introducing a

female into such a scene of danger or hardship, especially one

whose happiness is dearer to me than my own: but here there is

universal tranquillity, though the multitudes are so great that

a missionary needs not go three miles from his house without

having a congregation of many thousands. You would not be left

in solitude if I were to make any distant excursion, because no

chaplain is stationed where there is not a large English

Society. My salary is abundantly sufficient for the support of a

married man, the house and number of people kept by each

Company's servant being such as to need no increase for a

family establishment. As I must make the supposition of your

coming, though it may be perhaps a premature liberty, I should

give you some directions. This letter will reach you about the

latter end of the year; it would be very desirable if you could

be ready for the February fleet, because the voyage will be

performed in far less time than at any other season. George will

find out the best ship--one in which there is a lady of high

rank in the service would be preferable. You are to be

considered as coming as a visitor to Mr. Brown, who will write

to you or to Colonel Sandys, who is best qualified to give you

directions about the voyage. Should I be up the country on your

arrival in Bengal, Mr. Brown will be at hand to receive you, and

you will find yourself immediately at home. As it will highly

expedite some of the plans which we have in agitation that you

should know the language as soon as possible, take Gilchrist's

_Indian Stranger's Guide_, and occasionally on the voyage learn

some of the words.

If I had room I might enlarge on much that would be interesting

to you. In my conversations with Marshman, the Baptist

missionary, our hearts sometimes expand with delight and joy at

the prospect of seeing all these nations of the East receive the

doctrine of the Cross. He is a happy labourer; and I only wait,

I trust, to know the language to open my mouth boldly and make

known the mystery of the Gospel. My romantic notions are for the

first time almost realised; for in addition to the beauties of

sylvan scenery may be seen the more delightful object of

multitudes of simple people sitting in the shade listening to

the words of eternal life. Much as yet is not done; but I have

seen many discover by their looks while Marshman was preaching

that their hearts were tenderly affected. My post is not yet

determined; we expect, however, it will be Patna, a civil

station, where I shall not be under military command. As you are

so kindly anxious about my health, I am happy to say, that

through mercy my health is far better than it ever was in

England.

The people of Calcutta are very desirous of keeping me at the

mission-church, and offer to any Evangelical clergyman a

chaplain's salary and a house besides. I am of course deaf to

such a proposal; but it is strange that no one in England is

_tempted_ by such an inviting situation. I am actually going to

mention it to Cousin T.H. and Emma--not, as you may suppose,

with much hope of success; but I think that possibly the chapel

at Dock may be too much for him, and he will have here a sphere

of still greater importance. As this will be sent by the

overland despatch, there is some danger of its not reaching you.

You will therefore receive a duplicate, and perhaps a triplicate

by the ships that will arrive in England a month or two after. I

cannot write now to any of my friends. I will therefore trouble

you, if you have opportunity, to say that I have received no

letters since I left England, but one from each of these--Cousin

Tom and Emma, Simeon, Sargent, Bates: of my own family I have

heard nothing. Assure any of them whom you may see of the

continuance of my affectionate regard, especially dear Emma. I

did not know that it was permitted me to write to you, or I fear

she would not have found me so faithful a correspondent on the

voyage. As I have heretofore addressed you through her, it is

probable that I may be now disposed to address her through

you--or, what will be best of all, that we both of us address

her in one letter from India. However, you shall decide, my

dearest Lydia. I _must_ approve your determination, because with

that spirit of simple-looking to the Lord which we both

endeavour to maintain, we must not doubt that you will be

divinely directed. Till I receive an answer to this, my prayers

you may be assured will be constantly put up for you that in

this affair you may be under an especial guidance, and that in

all your ways God may be abundantly glorified by you through

Jesus Christ. You say in your letter that _frequently every day_

you remember my worthless name before the throne of grace. This

instance of extraordinary and undeserved kindness draws my heart

toward you with a tenderness which I cannot describe. Dearest

Lydia, in the sweet and fond expectation of your being given to

me by God, and of the happiness which I humbly hope you yourself

might enjoy here, I find a pleasure in breathing out my

assurance of ardent love. I have now long loved you most

affectionately, and my attachment is more strong, more pure,

more heavenly, because I see in you the image of Jesus Christ. I

unwillingly conclude, by bidding my beloved Lydia adieu.

H. MARTYN.

Serampore: September 1, 1806.

My dearest Lydia,--With this you will receive the duplicate of

the letter I sent you a month ago, by the overland despatch. May

it find you prepared to come! All the thoughts and views which I

have had of the subject since first addressing you, add tenfold

confirmation to my first opinion; and I trust that the blessed

God will graciously make it appear that I have been acting under

a right direction, by giving the precious gift to me and to the

Church in India. I sometimes regret that I had not obtained a

promise from you of following me at the time of our last parting

at Gurlyn, as I am occasionally apt to be excessively impatient

at the long delay. Many, many months must elapse before I can

see you or even hear how you shall determine. The instant your

mind is made up you will send a letter by the overland despatch.

George will let you know how it is to be prepared, as the

Company have given some printed directions. It is a consolation

to me during this long suspense, that had I engaged with you

before my departure I should not have had such a satisfactory

conviction of it being the will of God. The Commander-in-chief

is in doubt to which of the three following stations he shall

appoint me--Benares, Patna, or Moorshedabad; it will be the

last, most probably. This is only two days' journey from

Calcutta. I shall take my departure in about six weeks. In the

hour that remains, I must endeavour to write to my dear sister

Emma, and to Sally. By the fleet which will sail hence in about

two months, they will receive longer letters. You will then, I

hope, have left England. I am very happy here in preparing for

my delightful work, but I should be happier still if I were

sufficiently fluent in the language to be actually employed; and

happiest of all if my beloved Lydia were at my right hand,

counselling and animating me. I am not very willing to end my

letter to you; it is difficult not to prolong the enjoyment of

speaking, as it were, to one who occupies so much of my sleeping

and waking hours; but here, alas! I am aware of danger; and my

dear Lydia will, I hope, pray that her unworthy friend may love

no creature inordinately.

It will be base in me to depart in heart from a God of such love

as I find Him to be. Oh, that I could make some returns for the

riches of His love! Swiftly fly the hours of life away, and then

we shall be admitted to behold His glory. The ages of darkness

are rolling fast away, and shall soon usher in the Gospel period

when the whole world shall be filled with His glory. Oh, my

beloved sister and friend, dear to me on every account, but

dearest of all for having one heart and one soul with me in the

cause of Jesus and the love of God, let us pray and rejoice, and

rejoice and pray, that God may be glorified, and the dying

Saviour see of the travail of His soul. May the God of hope fill

us with all joy and peace in believing, that we may both of us

abound in hope through the power of the Holy Ghost. Now, my

dearest Lydia, I cannot say what I feel--I cannot pour out my

soul--I could not if you were here; but I pray that you may love

me, if it be the will of God; and I pray that God may make you

more and more His child, and give me more and more love for all

that is God-like and holy. I remain, with fervent affection,

Yours, in eternal bonds,

H. MARTYN.

TO CHARLES SIMEON[23]

Calcutta: September 1, 1806.

My dearest Brother,--I feel no hesitation about inviting Miss

L.G. on her own account, except it be that she should come so

far for one who is so utterly unworthy of her. I would rather

die than bring one whom I honour so much into a situation of

difficulty; but indeed there is no hardship to be encountered.

In my absence she might, if she pleased, visit the English

ladies who are always to be found at the different stations. The

plan about to be adopted by the Baptists is to establish

missionary stations in the country; while one missionary makes

the circuit of the surrounding country, another shall always be

in the way to receive enquiries and to explain. I should think

that a zealous woman, acquainted with the language, and

especially if assisted by native brethren, might be of use in

this way without moving from her house.... Three such men as

Carey, Marshman, and Ward, so suited to one another and to their

work, are not to be found, I should think, in the whole world.

_September 13._--Heard of the arrival of Corrie and Parson at

Madras, and of my appointment to Dinapore.

_September 15._--Called with Mr. Brown on Mr. Udny, then went up

with him to Serampore, and passed much of the afternoon in

reading with him a series of newspapers from England. How

affecting to think how the fashion of this world passeth away!

What should I do without Christ as an everlasting portion! How

vain is life, how mournful is death, and what is eternity

without Christ! In the evening Marshman and Ward came to us. By

endeavouring to recollect myself as before God, I found more

comfort, and was enabled to show more propriety in conversation.

_September 16._--Passed the day with moonshi in Hindustani and

writing sermon. In the evening wrote to Lydia.

_September 17._--The blaze of a funeral pile this morning near

the pagoda drew my attention. I ran out, but the unfortunate

woman had committed herself to the flames before I arrived. The

remains of the two bodies were visible. At night, while I was at

the missionaries', Mr. Chamberlain arrived from up the country.

Just as we rejoiced at the thought of seeing him and his wife,

we found she had died in the boat! I do not know when I was so

shocked; my soul revolted at everything in this world, which God

has so marked with misery--the effect of sin. I felt reluctance

to engage in every worldly connection. Marriage seemed terrible,

by exposing one to the agonising sight of a wife dying in such

circumstances.

_September 24._--Went down to Calcutta with Mr. Brown and

Corrie, and found letters. My affections of love and joy were so

excited by them that it was almost too much for my poor frame.

My dearest Lydia's assurances of her love were grateful enough

to my heart, but they left somewhat of a sorrowful effect,

occasioned I believe chiefly from a fear of her suffering in any

degree, and partly from the long time and distance that separate

us, and uncertainty if ever we shall be permitted to meet one

another in this world. In the evening the Lord gave me near and

close and sweet communion with Him on this subject, and enabled

me to commit the affair with comfort into His hands. Why did I

ever doubt His love? Does He not love us far better than we love

one another?

_September 25._--Went to Serampore with Mr. Brown and Parson; in

the afternoon read with moonshi; enjoyed much of the solemn

presence of God the whole day, had many happy seasons in prayer,

and felt strengthened for the work of a missionary, which is

speedily to begin; blessed be God! My friends are alarmed about

the solitariness of my future life, and my tendency to

melancholy; but, O my dearest Lord! Thou art with me, Thy rod

and Thy staff they comfort me. I go on Thine errand, and I know

that Thou art and wilt be with me. How easily canst Thou support

and refresh my heart!

TO LYDIA GRENFELL

Serampore: September 1806.

How earnestly do I long for the arrival of my dearest Lydia!

Though it may prove at last no more than a waking dream that I

ever expected to receive you in India, the hope is too pleasing

not to be cherished till I am forbidden any longer to hope. Till

I am assured of the contrary, I shall find a pleasure in

addressing you as my own. If you are not to be mine you will

pardon me; but my expectations are greatly encouraged by the

words you used when we parted at Gurlyn, that I had better _go

out_ free, implying, as I thought, that you would not be

unwilling to follow me if I should see it to be the will of God

to make the request. I was rejoiced also to see in your letter

that you unite your name with mine when you pray that God would

keep us both in the path of duty: from this I infer that you are

by no means _determined_ to remain separate from me. You will

not suppose, my dear Lydia, that I mention these little things

to influence your conduct, or to implicate you in an engagement.

No, I acknowledge that you are perfectly free, and I have no

doubt that you will act as the love and wisdom of our God shall

direct. Your heart is far less interested in this business than

mine, in all probability; and this on one account I do not

regret, as you will be able to see more clearly the directions

of God's providence. About a fortnight ago I sent you a letter

accompanying the duplicate of the one sent overland in August.

If these shall have arrived safe you will perhaps have left

England before this reaches it. But if not, let me entreat you

to delay not a moment. Yet how will my dear sister Emma be able

to part with you, and George--but above all your _mother_? I

feel very much for you and for them, but I have no doubt at all

about your health and happiness in this country.

The Commander-in-chief has at last appointed me to the station

of Dinapore, near Patna, and I shall accordingly take my

departure for that place as soon as I can make the necessary

preparations. It is not exactly the situation I wished for,

though in a temporal point of view it is desirable enough. The

air is good, the living cheap, the salary 1,000_l._ a year, and

there is a large body of English troops there. But I should have

preferred being near Benares, the heart of Hinduism. We rejoice

to hear that two other brethren are arrived at Madras on their

way to Bengal, sent, I trust, by the Lord to co-operate in

overturning the kingdom of Satan in these regions. They are

Corrie and Parson, both Bengal chaplains. Their stations will be

Benares and Moorshedabad--one on one side of me and the other on

the other. There are also now ten Baptist missionaries at

Serampore. Surely good is intended for this country.

Captain Wickes, the good old Captain Wickes, who has brought out

so many missionaries to India, is now here. He reminds me of

Uncle S. I have been just interrupted by the blaze of a funeral

pile, within a hundred yards of my pagoda. I ran out, but the

wretched woman had consigned herself to the flames before I

reached the spot, and I saw only the remains of her and her

husband. O Lord, how long shall it be? Oh, I shall have no rest

in my spirit till my tongue is loosed to testify against the

Devil, and deliver the message of God to these His unhappy

bond-slaves. I stammered out something to the wicked Brahmins

about the judgments of God upon them for the murder they had

just committed, but they said it was an act of her own

free-will. Some of the missionaries would have been there, but

they are forbidden by the Governor-General to preach to the

natives in the British territory. Unless this prohibition is

revoked by an order from home it will amount to a total

suppression of the mission.

I know of nothing else that will give you a further idea of the

state of things here. The two ministers continue to oppose my

doctrines with unabated virulence; but they think not that they

fight against God. My own heart is at present cold and slothful.

Oh, that my soul did burn with love and zeal! Surely were you

here I should act with more cheerfulness and activity with so

bright a pattern before me. If Corrie brings me a letter from

you, and the fleet is not sailed, which, however, is not likely,

I shall write to you again. Colonel Sandys will receive a letter

from me and Mr. Brown by this fleet. Continue to remember me in

your prayers, as a weak brother. I shall always think of you as

one to be loved and honoured.

H. MARTYN.

_September 26._--Employed as usual in Hindustani; visited

Marshman at night. He and Mr. Carey sat with us in the evening.

My heart still continuing some degree of watchfulness, but

enjoying less sweetness.

_October 1._--Reading with moonshi and preparing sermon; found

great cause to pray for brotherly love. Preached at night at the

mission-church on Eph. ii. 4. Had a very refreshing conversation

with Corrie afterwards; we wished it to be for the benefit of

two cadets, who supped with us, and I hope it will not be in

vain. May the Lord be pleased to make me act with a single eye

to His glory. How easy it is to preach about Christ Jesus the

Lord, and yet to preach oneself.

None of six letters from Lydia Grenfell have been preserved, but we

find in her _Diary_ more self-revealing of her heart than could be

made to Henry Martyn, and also more severity in judging of herself as

in the presence of God.

_1806, May 23._--Wrote dear H. I have felt to-day a return of

spirits, but have spent them too much in worldly things. I found

it a blessed season in prayer, yet I fear whether my

satisfaction did not rather arise from being enabled to pray

than from any extraordinary communications from above. O Lord,

search and try my heart, let not its deceitfulness impose on me.

_July 19._--Thought much this week of my dear absent friend.

_August 2._--My family's unhappiness preys on my mind--sister

burning with anger and resentment against sister, brother

against brother, a father against his children. Oh, what a

picture! Let me not add to the weight of family sin.

_August 4._--Passed a happy day. Read Baxter, and found in doing

so my soul raised above. Oh, let me have, blessed Lord,

anticipations of this blessedness and foretaste of glory. In Thy

presence above I shall be reunited to Thy dear saint, now

labouring in Thy vineyard in a distant land. One year is nearly

passed since we parted, but scarcely a waking hour, I believe,

has he been absent from my mind. In general my remembrance of

him is productive of pleasure--that I should possess so large a

share of his affection, and be remembered in his prayers, and

have an eternity to spend with him, yielding me in turn

delightful pleasing meditations; but just now nature grieves

that we are no more to meet below; yet, O my blessed Father, I

cry, 'Thy will be done, not as I will, but as Thou wilt.'

_August 10._--Went to church. My soul was very dull and

inanimate throughout the service--the sermon had nothing in it

to enliven or instruct. Barren as this place is for other means

of grace, I have the Word and leisure to search; I cannot then

complain, but of myself there is cause enough. Oh, how is my

soul so earthly? why cannot I rise and dwell above? Tied and

bound with the chain of sin, fettered and confined, I can only

cast a look above. One year is gone since my dear friend left

England. The number of our years of separation is so much

lessened, and our salvation draws near.

_October 19._--My birthday. One-and-thirty years have I existed

on this earth, for twenty-five of which all the amount was sin,

vanity, and rebellion against God; the last six, though spent

differently, yet for every day in them I am persuaded I have

sinned in heart, so as justly to merit condemnation of that God

in whose mercy I trust.

_November 5._--To-day I was reading of David's harp driving away

the evil spirit from Saul, and resolved again (the Lord helping

me) to try the sweet harp of Jesse's son in my first and last

waking thoughts, for sad and disordered are my thoughts upon my

friend. The expectation of letters from my dear friend in India

by this fleet is almost over, and my mind is rendered anxious

about him.

_November 25._--My very soul has been cheered by accounts from

my dear friend in India, for whom my mind has been greatly

anxious. 'Cast thy cares on Me' is a command badly attended to

by me.

The formal and first request from Henry Martyn to join him in India

reached Lydia Grenfell on March 2, 1807. We learn from his reply in

October 1807, from Dinapore, that she had sent a refusal in her

mother's name. But, on April 25, the Rev. Charles Simeon called on her

with the result which he thus records:

With her mother's leave Miss G. accompanied us to Col. Sandys',

when I had much conversation with her about Mr. Martyn's affair.

She stated to me all the obstacles to his proposals: first, her

health; second, the indelicacy of her going out to India alone

on such an errand; third, her former engagement with another

person, which had indeed been broken off, and he had actually

gone up to London two years ago to be married to another woman,

but, as he was unmarried, it seemed an obstacle in her mind;

fourth, the certainty that her mother would never consent to it.

On these points I observed that I thought the last was the only

one that was insurmountable; for that, first, India often agreed

best with persons of a delicate constitution--_e.g._ Mr. Martyn

himself and Mr. Brown. Second, it is common for ladies to go

thither without any previous connection; how much more,

therefore, might one go with a connection already formed! Were

this the only difficulty, I engaged, with the help of Mr. Grant

and Mr. Parry, that she should go under such protection as

should obviate all difficulties upon this head. Third, the step

taken by the other person had set her at perfect liberty.

Fourth, the consent of her mother was indispensable, and as that

appeared impossible, the matter might be committed to God in

this way. If her mother, of her own accord, should express

regret that the connection had been prevented, from an idea of

her being irreconcilably averse to it, and that she would not

stand in the way of her daughter's wishes, this would be

considered as a direction from God in answer to her prayers, and

I should instantly be apprised of it by her, in order to

communicate to Mr. M. _In this she perfectly agreed._ I told

her, however, that I would mention nothing of this to Mr. M.,

because it would only tend to keep him in painful suspense.

Thus the matter is entirely set aside, unless God, by a special

interposition of His providence (_i.e._ by taking away her

mother, or overruling her mind, contrary to all reasonable

expectation, to approve of it), mark His own will concerning it.

We find this account of the crisis in her _Diary_:

_1807, March 2._--Passed some peaceful happy days at Tregembo.

My return was marked by two events, long to be

remembered--seeing John and hearing from H.M. Great has been my

distress, but peace is returned, and could I cease from

anticipating future evils I should enjoy more. The Lord has been

gracious in affording me help, but He made me first feel my

weakness, and suffered Satan to harass me. I am called upon now

to act a decisive part.

_Marazion, March 8._--With David let me say, In the multitude of

thoughts within me Thy comforts have refreshed my soul. O Thou!

my refuge, my rest, my hiding-place, in every time of sorrow to

Thee I fly, and trust in the covert of Thy wings. Thou hast been

a shelter for me and a strong tower. I have liberty to pour out

my griefs into the bosom of my God, and doing so I am lightened

of their burden. The Lord's dealings are singular with me, yet

not severe, yea, they are merciful. Twice have I been called on

to act[24] ... in a way few are tried in, but the Lord's

goodness towards me is so manifest in the first, that I have

come to wait in silence and hope the event of this. I am

satisfied I have done now what is right, and peace has returned

to me; yet there is need of great watchfulness to resist the

enemy of souls, who would weaken and depress my soul, bringing

to remembrance the affection of my dear friend, and representing

my conduct as ungrateful towards him. To-day I have had many

distressing feelings on his account, yet in the general I have

been looking to things invisible and eternal, and therefore

enjoyed peace. I must live more in the contemplation of Christ

and heavenly things. Oh, come, fill and satisfy my soul, be my

leader and guide, dispose of me as Thou wilt. The pain of

writing to him is over, and I feel satisfied I wrote what duty

required of me.[25] Now then, return, O my soul, to thy rest.

_March 22._--A week of conflict and of mercies is over. May the

remembrance of Thy goodness never be forgotten. I bless Thee, O

my God, that Thou hast brought me hitherto, and with more reason

than David, inquire what am I that Thou shouldest do so?

_April 23._--To-day my mind has been painfully affected by the

receipt of letters from ----. I found in the presence of my

mother I dared not indulge the inclination I feel to mourn; and

believing my Heavenly Parent's will to be that I should be

careful for nothing, I ought to be equally exerting myself in

secret to resist the temptation. How true it is we suffer more

in the person of another dear to us than in our own! Lord, I

know Thou canst perfectly satisfy him by the consolation of Thy

Spirit and communications of Thy grace; Thou canst display the

glories of Thy beloved Son to his view, and put gladness into

his heart. Oh, support, cheer, and bless him; let Thy left hand

be under his head, and Thy right hand embrace him, that he may

feel less than my fears suggest. Oh, do Thou powerfully impress

our minds with a persuasion of Thy overruling hand in this

trial. Let us see it to be Thy will, and be now and ever

disposed to bow to it. Uphold me, Jesus, or I fan a prey to

distracting thoughts and imagination.

_April 24._--The arrival of dear Mr. Simeon has been a cordial

to my fainting heart. Lord, do Thou comfort me by him; none but

Thyself can give me lasting comfort--instruments are nothing

without Thee. Oh, may I now be watchful, for often, through my

depraved nature, when unlooked-for deliverance comes, I get

careless and light in my frame; then the Lord hides His face,

and trouble comes, which no outward circumstances can relieve. I

need especial direction from on high. Oh, may my dependence be

on the Lord, and I shall not go astray.

_April 28._--Went on Saturday with Mr. Simeon and Mr. E. to

Helston. Lord, I bless Thy holy name, I adore Thy wonderful

unmerited goodness towards such a base, vile creature, that Thou

shouldest at this particular season send me counsel and support

through the medium of Thy dear servant. I am brought home again

in safety, and enjoyed, during my absence, an opportunity of

seeing how a Christian lives.

_April 29._--The state of my mind lately has led me to fill too

much of my _Diary_ with expressions of regard for an earthly

object, and now I am convinced of the evil of indulging this

affection. Oh, may the Lord enable me to mortify it; may this

mirror of my heart show me more of love to God and less to

anything earthly. This morning was a sad one, and to the present

I have to mourn over the barrenness of my soul, its

indisposedness to any spiritual exertion. Almost constantly do I

remember my dear absent friend; may I do so with less pain.

_May 1._--I begin this month in circumstances peculiarly trying,

such as I can support only by aid vouchsafed from above, and

sought in constant prayer. The Lord is a stronghold in this time

of trouble.

_May 2._--To-day and yesterday I have found more composure of

mind than of late; once indeed the enemy (whose devices I am too

ignorant of to meet them as I ought) succeeded in distracting my

mind, and excited many sinful passions from the probability that

Miss Corrie, who is going to her brother, may be the partner

appointed for my dear friend. This continued for a short time

only, and I found relief at a throne of grace. It is a subject

I must not dwell on--when the trial comes, grace will be given;

but at present I have none to meet it; yet have I prayed the

Lord to provide him a suitable helpmate. Deceitful is my heart;

how little do I know it! O Thou bleeding Saviour, let me hide

myself in Thee from deserved wrath, and oh, speak peace once

more to my soul.

_May 3._--A day of much sinful inquietude. Oh, that I could

withdraw my affections! Oh, that I could once more feel I have

no desire but after heavenly things! What a chaos has my mind

been to-day, even in the house of God and at the throne of

grace. I have been, in imagination, conversing with a

fellow-creature. Where is thy heart? is a question not now to be

answered satisfactorily. Tied and bound with this chain, if for

a little time I rise to God, soon I turn from the glories of His

face, grieving His Spirit by preferring the ideal presence of my

friend--sometimes drawing the scene of his distress, at others

the pleasure of his return. Oh, let me not continue thus to walk

in the vanity of my mind. Oh, may I find sufficient happiness in

the presence of my God here, and live looking to the things not

seen, looking to that heavenly country where I shall enjoy in

perfection the blessed society and (of?) all I loved below.

_May 4._--Passed a day of less conflict, though I have very

imperfectly kept my resolution not to indulge vain improbable

expectations of the future; yet I have been favoured with a

greater freedom from them than yesterday.

_May 5._--I have been suddenly to-day seized with a violent

depression of spirits and a sadness of heart, hard to be

concealed. I have not, as before, fallen into a long train of

vain imaginations, drawing scenes improbable and vain, but my

soul has lost its spiritual appetite. I am looking forward to

distant and uncertain events with anticipations of sorrow and

trial impending. O my Lord and my God, come to my relief!

_May 9._--Oh, what great troubles and adversities hast Thou

showed me, and yet Thou didst turn again and refresh me! The

whole of this day has been a dark and exceedingly gloomy season,

my mind tossed to and fro like the tempestuous sea. I think the

chief cause of my distress arises from a dread of dishonouring

the name of the Lord, by appearing to have acted deceitfully in

the eyes of my family, and some pride is at the bottom of this

(I like not to be thought ill of), and also pain for the

disappointment my dear friend will soon know. His situation

grieves me infinitely more than my own. I think, for myself, I

want nothing more than I find in Thy presence.

_May 20._--My chief concern now is lest I should have given too

much reason for my dear friend's hoping I might yet be prevailed

on to attend to his request, and I feel the restraint stronger

than ever, that, having before promised, I am not free to marry.

I paint the scene of his return, and, whichever way I take,

nothing but misery and guilt seems to await me. Yet oh, I will

continue to pray, 'Heal me, and I shall be healed; save me, and

I shall be saved.' Thou art my strength and hope, O Lord; though

shame is my portion among men. Thou who knowest my heart, Thou

wilt not in this condemn me, for oh, Thou knowest these

consequences of my regard for Thy dear saint were not intended

by me, and that first, when I regarded him otherwise than as a

Christian brother, I believed myself free to do so, imagining

him I first loved united to another. When I consider this

circumstance my mind is relieved of a heavy burden, and yet I

must lament the evils that have flown from this mistake. My

thoughts have been called since Sunday into the eternal world by

the sudden death of a very kind friend, H.C. I have found this

event, though the cause of pain, very useful to me at this time.

_May 22._--The way Satan takes is made plain to me, and I must

resist him in the first pleasing ideas arising from the

remembrance of true affection in my dear and ever-esteemed

friend. When I yield to these, I am presently lost to all sober

thoughts, and plunged soon in the deepest sorrow for the

distress it has brought on him; then my conduct towards him and

every part of my family is painted in the most horrid colours,

till I am nearly distracted. Thus has Satan over and over

oppressed me, and relief been afforded my fainting soul through

the help of a superior power even than Satan. I must watch and

pray, for thus the Lord will bruise Satan under my feet.

_August 6._--This season recalls a dear friend to my

remembrance. Oh, may he occupy no more of my thoughts and

affections than is consistent with the will of God, and pleasing

in His sight. May these resignations be manifested by us both.

_August 9._--Just two years since I parted from a dear friend

and brother, whose memory will ever be cherished by me. Blessed

be God! I feel now as if he was the inhabitant of another world,

rather than of another part of this earth.

On October 10, 1806, on the close of his preparations for departure to

Dinapore, 'at night the missionaries, etc., met us at the pagoda for

the purpose of commending me to the grace of God.' 'My soul never yet

had such Divine enjoyment. I felt a desire to break from the body, and

join the high praises of the saints above.' Next day, in Calcutta, at

evening worship at Mr. Myers', 'I found my heaven begun on earth. No

work so sweet as that of praying and living wholly to the service of

God.' On Sunday, the 12th, 'at night I took my leave of the saints in

Calcutta in a sermon on Acts xx. 32. But how very far from being in

spirit like the great apostle.' On Monday he went up by land to

Barrackpore with Mr. Brown, 'happy in general.' On Tuesday 'Corrie

came to me at the pagoda and prayed with me.'

_1806, October 15._--Took my leave of the family at Aldeen in

morning worship; but I have always found my heart most unable to

be tender and solemn when occasions most require it. At eleven I

set off in a budgerow with Mr. Brown, Corrie, and Parson.

Marshman saw us as we passed the mission-house, and could not

help coming aboard. He dined with us, and after going on a

little way left us with a prayer. About sunset we landed at the

house of the former French governor, and walked five miles

through villages to Chandernagore, where we waited at an hotel

till the boats came up. With the French host I found a liberty I

could not have hoped for in his language, and was so enabled to

preach the Gospel to him. There are two Italian monks in this

place, who say Mass every day. I wished much to visit the

fathers, if there had been time. A person of Calcutta, here for

his health, troubled us with his profaneness, but we did not let

him go unwarned, nor kept back the counsel of God. At night in

the budgerow I prayed with my dear brethren.

_October 16._--Rose somewhat dejected, and walked on to

Chinsurah, the Dutch settlement, about three miles. There we

breakfasted, and dined with Mr. Forsyth, the missionary. We all

enjoyed great happiness in the presence and blessing of our God.

Mr. Forsyth came on with us from Chinsurah, till we stopped at

sunset opposite Bandel, a Portuguese settlement, and then we had

Divine service. I prayed and found my heart greatly enlarged.

After his departure our conversation was suitable and spiritual.

How sweet is prayer to my soul at this time! I seem as if I

never could be tired, not only of spiritual joys, but of

spiritual employments, since they are now the same.

_October 17._--My dear brethren, on account of the bad weather,

were obliged to leave me to-day. So we spent the whole morning

in a Divine ordinance in which each read a portion of Scripture

and all sang and prayed. Mr. Brown's passage, chosen from Joshua

i., was very suitable, 'Have I not commanded thee?' Let this be

an answer to my fears, O my Lord, and an assurance that I am in

Thy work. It was a very affecting season to me. In prayer I was

very far from a state of seriousness and affection. Indeed, I

have often remarked that I have never yet prayed comfortably

with friends when it has been preceded by a chapter of the

Revelation. Perhaps because I depend too much on the feelings

which the imagery of that book excites, instead of putting

myself into the hands of the Spirit, the only author of the

prayer of faith. They went away in their boat, and I was left

alone for the first time, with none but natives.

FOOTNOTES:

[22] _The Life and Times of Carey, Marshman, and Ward_, London, 1859.

_The Life of William Carey_ (John Murray), 2nd edition, 1887.

[23] First published (1892) by Rev. H.C.G. Moule from the autograph

collection made by Canon Carus, the successor and biographer of

Charles Simeon.

[24] A line has been erased by a subsequent writer.

[25] 'Her letter was to bid me a last farewell.'--Martyn's _Journal_.

This was received November 23.