Although, as time went on and John had come to a better insight of the
character of the eccentric person whom Dick had failed to fathom, his
half-formed prejudices had fallen away, it must be admitted that he
ofttimes found him a good deal of a puzzle. The domains of the serious
and the facetious in David's mind seemed to have no very well defined
boundaries.
The talk had drifted back to the people and gossip of Homeville, but,
sooth to say, it had not on this occasion got far away from those
topics.
"Yes," said Mr. Harum, "Alf Verjoos is on the hull the best off of any
of the lot. As I told ye, he made money on top of what the old man left
him, an' he married money. The fam'ly--some on 'em--comes here in the
summer, an' he's here part o' the time gen'ally, but the women folks
won't stay here winters, an' the house is left in care of Alf's sister
who never got married. He don't care a hill o' white beans fer anything
in Homeville but the old place, and he don't cal'late to have nobody on
his grass, not if he knows it. Him an' me are on putty friendly terms,
but the fact is," said David, in a semi-confidential tone, "he's about
an even combine of pykery an' viniger, an' about as pop'lar in gen'ral
'round here as a skunk in a hen-house; but Mis' Verjoos is putty well
liked; an' one o' the girls, Claricy is her name, is a good deal of a
fav'rit. Juliet, the other one, don't mix with the village folks much,
an' sometimes don't come with the fam'ly at all. She favors her father,"
remarked the historian.
"Inherits his popularity, I conclude," remarked John, smiling.
"She does favor him to some extent in that respect," was the reply; "an'
she's dark complected like him, but she's a mighty han'some girl,
notwithstandin'. Both on 'em is han'some girls," observed Mr. Harum,
"an' great fer hosses, an' that's the way I got 'quainted with 'em.
They're all fer ridin' hossback when they're up here. Did you ever ride
a hoss?" he asked.
"Oh, yes," said John, "I have ridden a good deal one time and another."
"Never c'd see the sense on't," declared David. "I c'n imagine gettin'
on to a hoss's back when 't was either that or walkin', but to do it fer
the fun o' the thing 's more 'n I c'n understand. There you be," he
continued, "stuck up four five feet up in the air like a clo'espin,
havin' your backbone chucked up into your skull, an' takin' the skin off
in spots an' places, expectin' ev'ry next minute the critter'll git out
f'm under ye--no, sir," he protested, "if it come to be that it was
either to ride a hossback fer the fun o' the thing or have somebody kick
me, an' kick me hard, I'd say, 'Kick away.' It comes to the same thing
fur 's enjoyment goes, and it's a dum sight safer."
John laughed outright, while David leaned forward with his hands on his
knees, looking at him with a broad though somewhat doubtful smile.
"That being your feeling," remarked John, "I should think saddle horses
would be rather out of your line. Was it a saddle horse that the Misses
Verjoos were interested in?"
"Wa'al, I didn't buy him fer that," replied David, "an' in fact when the
feller that sold him to me told me he'd ben rode, I allowed that ought
to knock twenty dollars off 'n the price, but I did have such a hoss,
an', outside o' that, he was a nice piece of hoss flesh. I was up to the
barn one mornin', mebbe four years ago," he continued, "when in drove
the Verjoos carriage with one of the girls, the oldest one, inside, an'
the yeller-haired one on a hossback. 'Good mornin'. You're Mr. Harum,
ain't you?' she says. 'Good mornin',' I says, 'Harum's the name 't I use
when I appear in public. You're Miss Verjoos, I reckon,' I says.
"She laughed a little, an' says, motionin' with her head to'ds the
carriage, 'My sister is Miss Verjoos. I'm Miss Claricy.' I took off my
cap, an' the other girl jest bowed her head a little.
"'I heard you had a hoss 't I could ride,' says the one on hossback.
"'Wa'al,' I says, lookin' at her hoss, an' he was a good one," remarked
David, "'fer a saddle hoss, I shouldn't think you was entirely out o'
hosses long's you got that one.' 'Oh,' she says, this is my sister's
hoss. Mine has hurt his leg so badly that I am 'fraid I sha'n't be able
to ride him this summer.' 'Wa'al,' I says, 'I've got a hoss that's ben
rode, so I was told, but I don't know of my own knowin'.'
"'Don't you ride?' she says. 'Hossback?' I says. 'Why, of course,' she
says. '_No_, ma'am,' I says, 'not when I c'n raise the money to pay my
_fine_' She looked kind o' puzzled at that," remarked David, "but I see
the other girl look at her an' give a kind of quiet laugh."
"'Can I see him?' says Miss Claricy. 'Cert'nly,' I says, an' went an'
brought him out. 'Oh!' she says to her sister, 'ain't he a beauty? C'n I
try him?' she says to me. 'Wa'al,' I says, 'I guess I c'n resk it if you
can, but I didn't buy him fer a saddle hoss, an' if I'm to own him fer
any len'th of time I'd ruther he'd fergit the saddle bus'nis, an' in any
case,' I says, 'I wouldn't like him to git a sore back, an' then agin,'
I says, 'I hain't got no saddle.'
"'Wa'al,' she says, givin' her head a toss, 'if I couldn't sit straight
I'd never ride agin. I never made a hoss's back sore in my life,' she
says. 'We c'n change the saddle,' she says, an' off she jumps, an', scat
my ----!" exclaimed David, "the way she knowed about gettin' that saddle
fixed, pads, straps, girt's, an' the hull bus'nis, an' put up her foot
fer me to give her a lift, an' wheeled that hoss an' went out o' the
yard a-kitin', was as slick a piece o' hoss bus'nis as ever I see. It
took fust money, that did," said Mr. Harum with a confirmatory shake of
the head. "Wa'al," he resumed, "in about a few minutes back she come,
lickity-cut, an' pulled up in front of me. 'C'n you send my sister's
hoss home?' she says, 'an' then I sha'n't have to change agin. I'll stay
on _my_ hoss,' she says, laughin', an' then agin laughin' fit to kill,
fer I stood there with my mouth open clear to my back teeth, not bein'
used to doin' bus'nis 'ith quite so much neatniss an' dispatch, as the
sayin' is.
"'Oh, it's all right,' she says. 'Poppa came home last night an' I'll
have him see you this afternoon or to-morro'.' 'But mebbe he 'n I won't
agree about the price,' I says. 'Yes, you will,' she says, 'an' if you
don't I won't make his back sore'--an' off they went, an' left me
standin' there like a stick in the mud. I've bought an' sold hosses to
some extent fer a consid'able number o' years," said Mr. Harum
reflectively, "but that partic'ler transaction's got a peg all to
itself."
John laughed and asked, "How did it come out? I mean, what sort of an
interview did you have with the young woman's father, the popular Mr.
Verjoos?"
"Oh," said David, "he druv up to the office the next mornin', 'bout ten
o'clock, an' come into the back room here, an' after we'd passed the
time o' day, he says, clearin' his throat in a way he's got, 'He-uh,
he-uh!' he says, 'my daughter tells me that she run off with a hoss of
yours yestidy in rather a summery manner, an--he-uh-uh--I have come to
see you about payin' fer him. What is the price?' he says.
"'Wa'al,' I says, more 'n anythin' to see what he'd say, 'what would you
say he was wuth?' An' with that he kind o' stiffened a little stiffer 'n
he was before, if it could be.
"'Really,' he says, 'he-uh-uh, I haven't any idea. I haven't seen the
animal, an' I should not consider myself qual'fied to give an opinion
upon his value if I had, but,' he says, 'I don't know that that makes
any material diff'rence, however, because I am quite--he-uh, he-uh--in
your hands--he-uh!--within limits--he-uh-uh!--within limits,' he says.
That kind o' riled me," remarked David. "I see in a minute what was
passin' in his mind. 'Wa'al,' I says, 'Mr. Verjoos, I guess the fact o'
the matter is 't I'm about as much in the mud as you be in the
mire--your daughter's got my hoss,' I says. 'Now you ain't dealin' with
a hoss jockey,' I says, 'though I don't deny that I buy an' sell hosses,
an' once in a while make money at it. You're dealin' with David Harum,
Banker, an' I consider 't I'm dealin' with a lady, or the father of one
on her account,' I says.
"'He-uh, he-uh! I meant no offense, sir,' he says.
"'None bein' meant, none will be took,' I says. 'Now,' I says,' I was
offered one-seventy-five fer that hoss day before yestidy, an' wouldn't
take it. I can't sell him fer that,' I says.
"'He-uh, uh! cert'nly not,' he says.
"'Wait a minit,' I says. 'I can't sell him fer that because I
_said_ I wouldn't; but if you feel like drawin' your check fer
one-seventy-_six_,' I says, 'we'll call it a deal,'" The speaker
paused with a chuckle.
"Well?" said John.
"Wa'al," said David, "he, he, he, he! That clean took the wind out of
him, an' he got redder 'n a beet. 'He-uh-uh-uh-huh! really,' he says, 'I
couldn't think of offerin' you less than two hunderd.'
"'All right,' I says, 'I'll send up fer the hoss. One-seventy-six is my
price, no more an' no less,' an' I got up out o' my chair."
"And what did he say then?" asked John.
"Wa'al," replied Mr. Harum, "he settled his neck down into his collar
an' necktie an' cleared his throat a few times, an' says, 'You put me in
ruther an embarrassin' position, Mr. Harum. My daughter has set her
heart on the hoss, an'--he-uh-uh-uh!'--with a kind of a smile like a
wrinkle in a boot, 'I can't very well tell her that I wouldn't buy him
because you wouldn't accept a higher offer than your own price. I--I
think I must accede to your proposition, an'--he-uh-uh--accept the
favor,' he says, draggin' the words out by the roots.
"'No favor at all,' I says, 'not a bit on't, not a bit on't. It was the
cleanest an' slickist deal I ever had,' I says, 'an' I've had a good
many. That girl o' your'n,' I says, 'if you don't mind my sayin' it,
comes as near bein' a full team an' a cross dog under the wagin as you
c'n git; an' you c'n tell her if you think fit,' I says, 'that if she
ever wants anythin' more out o' _my_ barn I'll throw off twenty-four
dollars ev'ry time, if she'll only do her own buyin'.'
"Wa'al," said Mr. Harum, "I didn't know but what he'd gag a little at
that, but he didn't seem to, an' when he went off after givin' me his
check, he put out his hand an' shook hands, a thing he never done
before."
"That was really very amusing," was John's comment.
"'T wa'n't a bad day's work either," observed Mr. Harum. "I've sold the
crowd a good many hosses since then, an' I've laughed a thousan' times
over that pertic'ler trade. Me 'n Miss Claricy," he added, "has alwus
ben good friends sence that time--an' she 'n Polly are reg'lar neetups.
She never sees me in the street but what it's 'How dee do, Mr. H-a-rum?'
An' I'll say, 'Ain't that ole hoss wore out yet?' or, 'When you comin'
'round to run off with another hoss?' I'll say."
At this point David got out of his chair, yawned, and walked over to the
window.
"Did you ever in all your born days," he said, "see such dum'd weather?
Jest look out there--no sleighin', no wheelin', an' a barn full wantin'
exercise. Wa'al, I guess I'll be moseyin' along." And out he went.