* * * * *
INHABITED HOUSE DUTY.--The servants'. And I wish they'd do it.--Yours,
paterfamilias.
* * * * *
SANCTA SIMPLICITAS.--_Housemaid._ "We're getting up a sweepstakes, Mrs.
Thrupp. Won't you join?"
_Housekeeper._ "Gracious me, child; not I! Why if I _won_ a horse I
shouldn't know what to _do_ with him!"
[Illustration: EARLY DOMESTIC TRIALS.--_Young Wife (in great
trepidation--to her brother)._ "Tommy, I'm going to give the cook
warning. Just listen at this corner, and as soon as you hear me say,
'Cook, I give you a month's warning from to-day,' mind you call me, and
say I'm wanted immediately!"]