Fagged and jaded, Daphne mine,
For our annual change I pine.
Once again the problem's here,
Whither we shall go this year.
Let who will seek lake or moor,
"_Bad_" or hydro, spa or "_kur_,"
Switzerland and Germany
Have no charms for you and me.
There while restless tourists haste,
"Good old Margate" suits our taste.
On its old familiar ground
We will make the usual round.
Meet Smith, Robinson and Brown,
Whom we daily see in town;
Hear the niggers or the bands
On the pier, the fort, the sands;
Revel in each well-known joy,
Then, when these enchantments cloy,
And for change again we yearn,
Why, then, Daphne, we'll return.
* * * * *
THE number of stowaways who secrete themselves in big vessels is
becoming a growing evil. A Norwegian barquantine reached Plymouth on
Friday with an entire cargo of hides.
* * * * *
A VERY REVOLTING PLACE.--Brazil.
* * * * *
[Illustration: French Tourist, on a visit to London for the first time,
makes a note in his pocket-book of the name of the street in which his
hotel is situated.]
* * * * *
A BERLIN.--Although Berlin is "on the Spree," its cheerfulness is
considerably discounted by "the Oder" in its vicinity.
* * * * *
[Illustration: "JOINT OCCUPATION"
(_Suggested by Cook's Tourist in Egypt._)]
* * * * *
OVERHEARD AT CHAMONIX.--_Stout British Matron_ (_in a broad British
accent, to a slim diligence driver_). Etes-vous la diligence?
_Driver._ Non, madame, mais j'en suis le cocher.
_Matron_ (_with conviction_). C'est la meme chose; gardez pour moi trois
places dans votre interieur demain.
* * * * *
[Illustration: PHILLIPOPOLIS
_Toper Major_ (_over their third bottle of a Grand Vin_). "I shay, ol'
f'ler, neksh year thinksh'll go see ex'bishun at Ph-Phipp at
Philup-popple----"
_Toper Minor._ "I know, ol' f'ler. You mean Philipoppoppo--poppo----"
_Toper Major._ "Thatsh it--shame place. Have 'nother bo'l!"
[_They drink._
]
* * * * *