I have now given every thing between my beloved and me a full
consideration; and my puzzle is over. What has brought me to a speedier
determination is, that I think I have found out what she means by the
week's distance at which she intends to hold me. It is, that she may
have time to write to Miss Howe, to put in motion that cursed scheme of
her's, and to take measures upon it which shall enable her to abandon and
renounce me for ever. Now, Jack, if I obtain not admission to her
presence on my return; but am refused with haughtiness; if her week be
insisted upon (such prospects before her); I shall be confirmed in my
conjecture; and it will be plain to me, that weak at best was that love,
which could give place to punctilio, at a time when that all-reconciling
ceremony, as she must think, waits her command:--then will I recollect
all her perversenesses; then will I re-peruse Miss Howe's letters, and
the transcripts from others of them; give way to my aversion to the life
of shackles: and then shall she be mine in my own way.
But, after all, I am in hopes that she will have better considered of
every thing by the evening; that her threat of a week's distance was
thrown out in the heat of passion; and that she will allow, that I have
as much cause to quarrel with her for breach of her word, as she has with
me for breach of the peace.
These lines of Rowe have got into my head; and I shall repeat them very
devoutly all the way the chairman shall poppet me towards her by-and-by.
Teach me, some power, the happy art of speech,
To dress my purpose up in gracious words;
Such as may softly steal upon her soul,
And never waken the tempestuous passions.